Disclaimer: I don't own Tokyo Ghoul.
Warning: Kaneki/Hide.
Note: Enjoy.
Summary: "He's hopeless - damaged goods, not desirable anymore. Who would want someone so ugly, anyway?"
Chapter One
He lowered the camera.
He watched them, with a small smile. The couple kissed - passionately and lovingly, just before embracing.
He wanted that too, except that's impossible. He's hopeless - damaged goods, not desirable anymore.
Who would want someone so ugly, anyway?
XOXO
He adjusted the scarf.
He was self-conscious, even insecure nowadays. He was afraid all the time - suffering from nightmares, with anxiety attacks, too.
He was prescribed medication, but they weren't effective. It was no use taking them, then. It never helped him, anyway.
"There you are, Hide."
"You wanted to talk, Kaneki."
"We're having a dance. I thought you should come."
"I don't think so. I'm fine with dorm parties, but not formal dances. Besides, I don't have a date, like you do."
"You don't need one. If you really want one, I'm sure you'll find someone at the dance who's without a date. Anyway, I just want my best friend there for me."
"Fine, I'll come, then. You have to save me a dance, though."
"Thanks, Hide. And, I promise I will."
XOXO
He was lonely.
He felt uninvited, too. Unlike Kaneki and the others, Hide was human.
He came only for Kaneki, though. The ghoul was dancing - swaying and twirling Touka, who he hated deep down. She had him - coiled around her finger, like the other ghouls here.
He didn't trust them, not one. His friend trusted them though, even replaced him with those ghouls.
"You don't belong here."
"Is that so, Tsukiyama? Well, Kaneki asked me to come."
"He did so out of pity."
"He did so because we're best friends. I've known him longer than you have. I've known him since he was human. You can't threaten me, Tsukiyama. Why don't you go bother someone else, then?"
"Whatever."
XOXO
He still felt betrayed.
He was clinging onto the past. He ought to let go, especially because Kaneki has. He loved Kaneki, though. He just can't move on, then.
It's not that simple. It's easier said than done, like always. It's a work in theory, just an appealing idea.
"Why are you leaving so soon?"
"I'm tired, Hinami. It's getting late, anyway. Besides, I have class tomorrow."
"Kaneki would want you to be here, though."
"I'm not so sure. Kaneki looks like he's having more fun without me. Bye, Hinami, I'll see you later."
"Goodbye, Hide."
XOXO
It was cold.
He hugged himself. He would've called a cab, but his phone wasn't working. It was out of battery, like always nowadays.
He never received texts or calls, anyway. His phone remained barely charged, then. That didn't bother him, though.
He stopped outside a building. It was a cosmetology center, but for cosmetic surgery.
"Are you interested in scheduling an appointment, sir?"
"I don't think you'd be able to fix me."
"There is nothing we can't fix, sir."
"I guess I should give you a chance. I don't have anything to lose, anyway."
"You won't be disappointed, sir. We won't let you down."
"I hope not."
XOXO
It was unnerving.
He watched the surgeon, with curious eyes. He was being studied - marked by a black sharpie, where he'll be operated on. He was aware of the procedure - seen them on television, which had been depicted correctly. It's a surprise - considering Hollywood exaggerates everything, especially a certain genre.
His surgeon moved back, then. He was given a mirror, but couldn't take the mirror. He looked away - blond eyebrows furrowing together, as his chin began trembling. He started sobbing - breaking down, a regular occurrence now.
"You remind me of my son."
"H-How can I possibly remind you of your son?"
"My son was a lovestruck boy, too. He was naively loyal, to this girl who didn't give a damn about him. She drove him to his death, to his undoing."
"I-I'm so sorry."
"It's quite alright. That happened years ago, but I get sentimental sometimes. Don't worry, I'll help you get over them."
"I-I don't understand."
"I couldn't help my son. That doesn't mean I can't help you, though. There's no need to thank me, either."
"I still should thank you. This means a lot to me."
XOXO
It was a gas mask.
It temporarily occupied him - making him feel drowsy and delirious, his body numb. He was awake for now, not for long. He couldn't fight anymore, but still kept trying to.
A nurse brushed his hair, as his eyes began drooping down. It was comforting and soothing him - lulling sleep to him, so he couldn't resist. He then surrendered and succumbed - consciousness slipping away, to the realm of dreams.
"It's alright, Hide. You're in good hands."
"I'm so tired … "
"I know you are. I heard my son say the same thing, too. Let me take care of you, then."
"I try so hard. It's just never enough. I'll never be good enough for him … "
"He doesn't deserve you, like that bitch didn't deserve my son. I'll make you a jewel, the greatest mistake of his life. You have my word, Hide."
"I spent my whole life dedicated to him. I want my life back. I need my life back … "
"I'll restore you to your former glory. I'll give you more than just life. I'll give you a purpose of living again."
"That's what I've been missing. For my whole life, I made him my purpose of living … "
"That's where you went wrong. You shouldn't make someone your reason of living in this cruel, cruel world."
"I only know now. If I had known before, I would've let him go a lot sooner … "
"Can you be so sure of yourself?"
"Maybe I can't. But, I know I can't continue on like this … "
"That's why I'm here. I'm going to make you better."
"I'm entrusting myself to you. I don't know what else to do anymore."
"You came to the right place. You came to me. I have dealt with these problems before."
"You will cure me, right?"
"Of course, I will. I gave you my word, Hide."
A/N: What do you think? Leave me your thoughts.