If anyone has been following Banana Man (Although it is unlikely, since he hasn't been around nearly long enough, and I haven't developed a large fan-base) this will be the third or fourth installment, depending on how I recover from this hiatus. I think I may do some kind of milestone eventually, though I think it will be on fiction press or something. I'm getting ahead of myself though. Rest assured this will be the first multi-chaptered one I'll do, maybe the only one, so be proud, Rune-Scape fan-boys and girls. (Girl…girls? Are they out there?)

Side note: I do not own Rune-Scape. Also, if you have no sense of humor, don't read this fic. Please. Do not go out on a tear at me because I spell "Rune-Scape" funny or I put spaces in the screen names; I'm trying to avoid having Word calling me a moron for spelling stuff weird, ok? Banana Man 752 is actually my character, but none of the others are, so don't bother them because they're mentioned. Thank you for reading this legal mumbo jumbo. Why are you still reading this? Stop! The story's down there! Stop reading the disclaimers! Don't make me come out of this computer!

It was on a busy, industrious path that a mysterious figure clad in baggy yellow garments appeared. "Banana Man 752 has logged in" A strange voice announced.

The character known as Banana Man looked around his peculiar surroundings. All around him, people leading long conga lines marched this way and that to go wherever they were going today. Goblins milled about as well, taking no notice of the abundance of humans, even though some were taking supreme pleasure in slaughtering them.

"Grape Girl 526 has logged in."

Banana Man cried out at the mention of his friend/sidekick/fellow fruit-themed superhero's name. He sent out a telepathic message to her (Which could be done here, surprisingly, with a push of a button.) ((Hey! You made it on!))

((So did you!)) His friend/sidekick/et cetera answered, ((Where are you?))

((In front of some freaky castle, with a bunch of people asking for free stuff. I came in a few seconds after you. Where are you now?))

((I'm on Tutorial Island, learning the basics.)) A pause, then Grape Girl asked ((Wait a minute. If you have only been here a few minutes longer than me, why aren't you going through the tutorial?))

((Because no one cares to hear about Banana Man going through a boring tutorial.))

Fan-Person: But the tutorial contains vital tips that could help you on your quest to become the ultimate Rune-Scaper!

Narrator: NO ONE!!!... Wants to hear about tutorials! Gat back behind the Anti-Narrator force field where I can't see you or narrate you eaten by wildebeests.

Fan-Person: Pfft… you used that same gimmick last time, I think… It really depends on how you recover from your hiatus…

"Hey!" Banana Man yelled, "We kinda have a story to run here! Do either of you mind?"

Narrator: Oh… right, well… (Clears throat) okay, where was I…

Banana Man thought for a second ((I get the feeling that this castle is the central point, where every lay line of power connects, that when a situation arises of dire straits, or those with limited battle skills arrive, here is where they congregate.)) he finally reported to Grape Girl.

((What was that? I was too busy learning how to fish.))

Our hero sighed, ((New players and people who die come to this freaky castle, so I'll meet you there, 'kay?))

((Okay, I'll meet you at wherever you're talking about. Have you seen Piney yet?))

Banana Man looked around. Piney the Pineapple Wonder was the third member of their elite cadre, as well as the one who introduced them to the game. ((No, I have yet to meet anyone named Piney. I've met 2 hot 4 U, I like Swords, Dancing Penguin, Hot Fudge Sundae…))

"Warrior Kitty 2937 has logged in!"

A female character in plate mail approached our hero. (I don't care what kind of metal it is, just imagine some über-powerful armor) "Hey! Banana Man!" she yelled, "I see you finally made it to Lum-bridge."

Our hero broke off the peculiar connection to Grape Girl to regard the character speaking to him, "Um, excuse me? Do I know you? Or are you one of my many fans?"

Fan-person: Pfft! Fans, that's a hoot. Like a two-bit story like this would have any fans.

The one (Non-Fan-person) fan in the audience: (Sniffle) Waaaaaaaaaahhhh! (Runs off, sobbing)

Narrator: Aw man! You see what you do? Come back, he was just kidding! (Makes the "I'm watching you." pantomime to the Fan-person, and then runs after)

Banana Man: Now what?

Grape Girl: Just keep going, I'll take the narrating until he gets back.

Warrior Kitty shook his head (via an exaggerated and ridiculous emote) "No, Banana Man, it's me, Piney."

"Piney?" Banana Man's incredulous stare would be so much more effective if one could actually see his face, "You're…wearing a skirt?"

"Well I am a female character here."

Profuse exaggerated laughing emotes burst from our hero, "Dude, who are you trying to kid? You're a guy, or that's the ugliest lady avatar ever. You so totally do not look like a chick."

"Oh yeah?" Piney/Warrior Kitty snapped back, "Well you don't look like a banana!"

Banana Man laughed, turning to look in a conveniently placed fountain, "What are you talking about? Of course I look like a ba…nan…AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!" He recoiled at the sight of his non-fruit related visage, "I look like a… like a…"

It is at this point that I appeared like a bolt out of the blue, except my entrance wasn't nearly as dramatic. (One minute I wasn't there, the next I was. Go figure.) No sooner had I entered than I heard the scream (Or read the scream, it only took up the entire chat-box-thing.) "Banana Man!" I yelled, "Where are you? Banana Man!!!!"

Banana Man turned to me, and for a moment we were both silent. We both stared at each other's grotesque forms, (I should mention we look anything but human on the other side of the monitor, and on that note, those characters were really ugly at close range.) and then, as one, we opened our mouths, breathed in sharply, and screamed.

"AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!"

OOOOOOOHHHH!!!"

"AAAAHHHH!!!!"

"OOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!!"

Warrior Kitty tried for the longest time to make us both stop, then finally shrugged his shoulders and joined us in our screaming match. Faintly, I could hear a user by the name of "Teh Haxxors" mutter a simple "Noobs." before walking off.

Banana Man, logging out. End of Chapter one. Don't worry; I'll get to the real game-bashing next time. Until then, keep your eyes on the monitor, and your fruit salads delicious and free of disgusting fruit flies!