No Hope
Chapter One
Summary: Ryou is going a bit loony. So, he ends up the Mental Hospital, Pine Rest. A very religious environment, he is rather more or less shocked when he hears the outburst of "Ra Damn It, You Bitch!" from one of the rooms during journaling.
Notes: This is NOT AU, alternate universe. Names have been altered to Ryou Takeya and Bakura Yono. Please don't steal their last names, they're borrowed from OCs of mine in my original novel, Pictures of You. Based on real life experience, though I've never been inpatient and never experienced "Code Red" or whatever you want to call it. Rated Teen for sexual implications, slight light yaoi-ness and of course, swearing. Part One of the Insanity Trilogy. The Poem is mine, you take without permission, you DIE. Thank you, and have a nice day.
x-Begin-x
Ryou Takeya stared at his arms. He had had this growing feeling, in the back of his mind, that won't stop, that they are too perfect. Everything about him was too perfect. It was nauseating.
He had tried the whole college thing with Yugi, but it hadn't worked. Every time he got up in the morning for school, there was this feeling of dread in him so severe, it caused him to throw up, get dizzy, and pass out.
Yugi was very concerned, and Ryou hated that. Why should Yugi concern himself with that. Ryou couldn't even attend school.
Ryou wanted to major in Creative Writing. He loved to write. That was the only time when he felt free, at ease. But he couldn't anymore, from all his shaking. And with his laptop broken, there was no hope...
"No hope..."
The words echoed through Ryou's mind as he stared at his too perfect, pasty white arms.
"Too Perfect..."
All right, that was the last straw, he had to add some color to his life. Like Red. Red was a happy color, an energetic color, the color of blood...
"The Color of Blood..."
He stood from the living room couch, and crossed, with quick strides, into the kitchen, still staring at his arms. Harshly, Ryou picked up a knife and-
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Yugi opened the door, and immediately the metallic smell assaulted him. "Oh, Kami," he gasped, covering his mouth with his sleeve. Blood was smeared all over the usually clean and white apartment, spread out everywhere because the boy only had so much. Yugi walked into the apartment slowly, thanking Kami and all his ancestors that Ryou had given him a key.
He eventually found Ryou in his room.
A sight to be seen, Ryou was covered in gashes, along his arms and legs, wearing only a white tank top and blue shorts. His breathing was ragged and heavy, as though each breath was a painful struggle. He even had cuts across his face. Yugi gagged.
"R-ryou!" he gasped, but the boy made no move to respond. Yugi ran from the room, scavenged up the phone, and dialed 911.
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It was an odd sensation. Sort of like... déja vu, as Ryou walked into the hospital. But it wasn't a real hospital, it was a mental hospital. 'I don't belong here...'
He looked around, eyes wide from fear, head still light from blood loss. Patients watched him with hunger in their eyes, and the other staff members with a wary, weary expression.
He wore a short sleeved light blue t-shirt and white slacks. So, much to his discomfort, the numerous stitches on his arms were visible. And of course there was his face...
"Now, you will be staying in suite four," the nurse said kindly. She was the only truly nice person Ryou had seen since he'd woken up, about two days ago. He hadn't even seen Yugi yet.
"T-thank you," Ryou whispered politely, looking up at her. She was quite tall, with short dark hair and dark eyes, but her eyes contained light.
"May God heal you," she whispered, and let him into the room.
"Y-yes," Ryou said, rather uncomfortable. He'd never been very good with religion. Sighing, he stepped inside to take a look around. It was rather plain. with white walls and a light blue carpet. The bed was well kept, white sheets and a white comforter and a white pillow. The white-haired teen literally twitched, and turned around.
"Miss?" he asked softly, and the Nurse stopped right before leaving and walked over.
"Yes, Takeya?" she said softly. Ryou smiled as best he could.
"Could I get some color in this room, please? It's... a tad too white, for my tastes...," he said softly. The nurse looked at him for a moment, from his white skin to his white hair. Everything about this boy was so faintly colored, it may as well have BEEN white. Even his clothes. She sighed.
"I'll get some paper and crayons, and you can decorate the walls with pictures." Ryou nodded. He would probably write on the paper instead, if he could manage to stop shaking. "You stay here," and she hurried off.
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I wake up to find myself
In a place that is not home
Oh how I miss myself
God, someone take me home.
---
Everything is white
too bright
too right
everything is light
---
And it's driving me insane
Driving me to pain
It's driving me insane
Driving me to maim
---
Everything I know
Has been here all along
Oh how I wish
things could change
---
Everything is white
too bright
too right
everything is light
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Ryou smiled at his poem. It exactly described the situation. He loved it when he could do that. And sure, the letters were squiggly, but they were his, and more importantly, they were legible.
"Ra Damn It, You Bitch!" broke the calm. Ryou jumped, and started coughing up blood. He stood shakily, still coughing, and walked toward the door and peered out.
"LEGGO! I'LL FUCKING MURDER YOU!" The screams were louder now, and more anger was in them. A man, with spiky silver hair, and glaring, sharp red eyes, was struggling against an army of attendants, one of whom was holding a syringe. He had pulled himself free and they were deadlocked
"Please, Yono, please just calm down-"
"I am NOT fucking 'Journaling' and I am DEFINITELY NOT Yono. My name is-"
They tackled him, and the man with the syringe jabbed it into the boy's arm.
"FUCK!" the boy screamed.
They clambered off him, and he sat up and coughed up a small amount of blood. Ryou watched this, then stared at his own bloodied hand. Then he looked back out the window.
"I hate you all," he heard Yono huff. But hadn't the boy said his name wasn't Yono? Why would they call him that?
"Yes, well, now you can go to your room," the nice Nurse from before informed Yono. He glared at her.
"No, i can't, because now I'm dizzy," Yono stated matter-of-factly. The nurse sighed.
"Bakura-"
"-Thank Ra SOMEONE knows-"
"- if you won't move, I'll carry you."
This so called Bakura looked at her, and watched for a long moment. Then sighed. "Do what you must, Nancy."
So Nancy scooped him up and carried him to his room. He didn't even squirm, merely sat there, arms and legs crossed, like a limp, very upset doll.
Ryou came out, watching as one of the other employees opened the door for Nancy to suite six, two doors down.
One of the nurses glanced at Ryou, and sputtered. "C-code Red!" Ryou blinked. Code what?
There was chaos after that. Everyone went berserk. Ryou merely stood there, dumbfounded, until finally, a Nurse wearing a surgical mask and latex gloves that went up to his elbows, took Ryou's arm, and led him into the examination room.
"Excuse me, what is Code Red? What's going on?" Ryou asked as the male Nurse sat him down and went to the sink.
"Kid, you've got blood on your hand."
"Oh! I-I'm sorry. But, what's the, Code Red?" Ryou insisted.
"That is Code Red. Blood. Red is the Color of Blood," the employee explained, coming over with a wash cloth and a bucket of sanitizing liquid.
"Oh..." Ryou breathed. "So, why such a fuss?"
"HIV, for one thing," the nurse said, cautiously cleaning off Ryou's hand. Ryou blinked.
"But I don't have-"
"-Never know here," the nurse stated. Ryou frowned.
"What's the other thing? Or things?" Ryou asked softly.
"Danger. Blood means someone's hurt-"
"I was just coughing."
The nurse looked up at him, then dabbed off the rest of the blood and set the bucket aside. "So you have internal bleeding."
"Well I- I have never coughed up blood before, and really, I don't think I got hurt-"
"Kid, you're covered in stitches. Self-mutilation stitches."
"Well, besides that!" Ryou snapped. The nurse blinked, then shook his head.
"Never mind, we'll have one of our doctors check you out a-sap. Yono too.."
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"Idiots... I ought to..." Bakura stopped. Then swore in his own language, ancient Egyptian. "There I go, speaking japanese again! Course, it's the only thing these morons actually understand, but still. When I talk to my self I ought to-" he stopped, and gripped his head. "I ought to calm down. I'm going to pass out at this rate."
Slowly, carefully, he got up and walked to the door. His room was barren- free of sheets, crayons, writing utensils, pillowcases, anything. Bakura peered out the window.
That's when he saw him.
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"I don't care," Bakura snapped at the figure he could barely make out. They looked like him, but different, and had unfurled a pair of enormous angelic wings, a light gray. The figure flexed it's wings.
"Please, just, just come back."
"No!"
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What he wasn't coming back to, Bakura was unsure. But if this truly was the one from his dreams, he'd find out.
That's when he and Ryou locked eyes.