Sirius Black is gay.
There's no other reasonable solution. He. Dumped. Moi. No man dumps 'God's gift to men' –no straight man anyway. Ok, I can admit to being a bit of a bitch at times, but I have reason! Like when the hottest, most charming guy in all of Hogwarts dumps me! The sexiest, hottest, prettiest, most amaaaaazing girl (etc. etc…) in all of Britain. It doesn't add up. Which is why I know and I think all of iyou /i know that he his most definitely totally and completely gay.
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"Siri! Siri, dear!" I called down the corridor, "Wait up!"
He froze and turned, and looked at me with tense shoulders, "What is it Angie?" I kept my smile in place though I was dying (absolutely dying) to stick my tongue out at him.
"Oh, nothing really, I just wanted to let you know that your secret is safe with me." I turned up the sympathy in my voice. Inwardly I patted myself on the back- Mother's acting lessons are starting to pay-off.
For a moment a look of alarm passed over his features, but then they relaxed and he shook his head, causing his wonderful black hair to flop into his gray eyes; a poor attempt to look mysterious, "My secret, m'dear?" Honestly, he needs the lessons more than I do.
"There, there." I patted him softly on his bristled cheek, "I know it's difficult to admit at first but it will get easier. I promise. You'll finally be able to stop leading those poor girls on." I put my hand on his shoulder and his merely amused smile turned into a serious frown.
"What are you on about Dussell?" I noted the use of my surname.
I gave him a look that clearly shouted pity, "Okay Sir-"
" Sirius ," he muttered and brushed my hand off his shoulder.
"-I understand, but I know you'll share your secret openly someday. Hopefully-for your sake and the rest of the females in your little…club- it will be soon." I spun on my heel and headed back to my common room.
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I sighed contentedly in front of the fire in the Hufflepuff common with my best friend, Celia, right next to me. Celia was my opposite in looks and personality -a Courtney Cox to my Jennifer Anniston- a brunette with big chocolate brown doll eyes and a huge heart. Where as I was a short blond with blue-gray eyes and a history of escapades ending in disaster, we were balanced.
"Revenge is definitely sweet, right up with sugar quills." I said jokingly.
She mock giggled and her wavy brown hair bounced up and down wildly, "What are you going to do to him?" Her brown eyes widened sarcastically, "Wait, no, don't tell me. You're going to make him look gay!"
I frowned at her, "Yeah…how'd ya know?"
"Well it's what you did to Alex when he dumped you, and Nick and come to think about it… I think you've done it to every guy who's dumped you."
"Ugh…" I took one of the pillows from the couch and buried my face in the Hufflepuff crest, "Shut up."
She rolled her eyes at me, "It's not a big deal, you'll just have to change it up a bit."
Encouraged I lifted my head, "How so?"
She smiled evilly (I swear I'm a bad influence on this girl), "Well… it's mostly the same," I lowered my head back down to the pillow, "just a little more…interesting." Interested again I sat up straight. "Instead of making him look gay, make him look like a transvestite." (SEE! BAD INFLUENCE!) Both my smile and hers grew wide.
"Brilliant, Cellie, Brilliant!
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The next morning I got to the Great Hall early eager to see if my little 'scheme' would work. Fortunately for me Sirius's IQ must have dropped some major points since I went out with him, he didn't even noticed what I had done.
-Recall-
"What are you on about Dussell?" he asked, my hand reached a little over his shoulder toward his bag.
I gave him a look, "Okay Siri-" I unzipped the bag a little.
I slipped a couple of 'items' into his backpack, " Sirius ,"he corrected me and brushed my hand off his shoulder.
"-I understand, but I know you'll share your secret openly someday. Hopefully-for your sake- it will be soon." I spun on my heel and headed back to my common room, with a satisfied smirk on my face.
-End Recall-
Entering the Great Hall I walked over to the Hufflepuff table and quietly snuck up behind Celia, "Cellie!" I yelled in her ear. She jumped nearly a foot.
"What was that for!?" she clapped her hands over her ears, "Argh, my ears are going to be ringing for the rest of the day."
"You know you love me." I said cheekily and sat down next to her and started piling waffles on my plate, she ignored me and started eating again. "And," I continued, "you're going to love this!"
Celia turned to me and raised one eyebrow in question, "Just watch." I told her. As I ate I kept my gaze fixed on the doors to the hall, keeping an eye out for Sirius, this caused a few problems I'll admit- (Angie! You knocked your OJ on my Potions Essay!!)-but nothing that couldn't easily be fixed with a quick wave of a wand. When he arrived with his friends I stopped eating anyway- the waffles lay soaking up the syrup beside them. ("You gonna eat that?")
Sirius and his best mates James, Remus and Peter strutted (Well Sirius did…) over to the almost full Gryffindor table. As they reached the table, four empty seats all next to each other- curtsey of the I ♥ the Marauder's Club (Minus Peter). The Marauder's were the pride of Hogwarts four of the most brilliant, charming, talented, handsome students in a long time. (Again Minus Peter)
Sirius was known as the rogue, handsome and charming with a new girl every week. (Why didn't I realize why before?) And what was even more unfair was that he was brilliant in every class with out trying.
James Potter, Sirius's best mate. They're close as brothers, they even looked somewhat alike, both tall with shaggy black hair. James was a Quidditch player, a chaser. He carried the snitch around with him and played with it when ever he was bored he'd play with it, catching it and letting it go and catching it again. James didn't date very often; he was too far gone with Lily Evans, a red-haired Gryffindor who hated him with a passion.
Remus Lupin is sort of the nerdy, smart, quiet type. That's not to say he's not good looking, because he is. He has this whole relaxed, almost oblivious air about him.
Peter Pettigrew, what a terrible name huh? He doesn't look much better. He's kind of pasty, his hair is brown but all… washed out so it looks kind of gray and he has these watery blue eyes and weird pointy front teeth. Over all he's kind of gross, short and sweaty all the time.
When I saw those girls scrambled to make room for the Marauder's I did the natural thing- I rolled my eyes, they were so easily deceived by good looks and charm. Some may call me a hypocrite since I had been one of those girls, but that was before I knew. Before I knew how big of assholes they were. Disgusted I turned to Celia to engage in some sort of distracting conversation, but before I could open my mouth I heart James's voice cut threw the noise in the Hall.
"Oh la la Padfoot! Looks like you've been keeping a secret from us!" I could see Sirius shaking his head madly and mouthing the word, 'No' over and over. James brandished a thick piece of parchment with little hearts over the front Sirius' name was written in neat calligraphy in the middle. "Let's open it shall we?" Most of the school had caught on to going on with the Marauders and it was really quiet while James opened the letter. I swear I heard a faint "Oh God." From Sirius and I smiled wide.
"James!" said Sirius, "Stop!" He made a lunge for the letter but missed and slipped off the bench. James didn't even blink.
He finally had the letter open in his hand and his eyes grew wide as he read out loud,
"Dear Sirius,
I had fun the other night. I never knew you were so loving! I enjoyed your kisses in the broom closet! Yummy. I hope we'll do it again soon. I can think of a couple of things I'd love to do.
Love, He stopped and I knew why. James's face turned bright, bright red and he shoved the letter at Sirius and walked quickly from the Great Hall. Sirius just sat there and read the letter and his face turned an even deeper red then James'.
I think most people thought the letter was from Lily and so he was just pissed at Sirius, which kinda defeats the point of it- but still Sirius looked more embarrassed than I've ever seen him so I accomplished what I had been trying to do.
Then suddenly Sirius stood up and stalked over to the Hufflepuff table, he had probably figured out that it was me who put the letter in his bag. I got up and grabbed my bag and started to run out of the Hall, but he beat me to it; Sirius grabbed my elbow and dragged me out of the Hall and down the corridor to the staircases. I looked at his angry face and flashing eyes and finally grasped the fact that I was in some deep crap. (A/N :that sounds funny!!!!)
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"What's your damage, Heather?" I snapped, when he dropped my arm.
"My name is not Heather!" He said indignantly.
I sighed obnoxiously, "I know it's not your name, it's a muggle-"
"-Saying." He cut me off. Sirius sighed and some of his obvious anger dissipated.
"Um, yeah…" I scuffed the ground with the front of my shoe, "So…why'd you bring me out here?"
"Why do you think? I'm not stupid, Angie."
I rolled my eyes but said nothing. The two of us stood saying nothing for a minute, until Sirius made a disgusted noise and walked away.
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