Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me as I have stated on everything I've written. This gets very redundant. Anyway, neither do I own the song that inspired the fic. That is by Xtreme.
Authors Note: Despite the fact that I love Remus/Tonks, this isn't about them. This story takes place before in two different times, at the beginning and end of OotP. Mentions when Tonks is at Hogwarts in her seventh year and Snape is 27, after she leaves Hogwarts.
Summary: Snape has noticed there is something strange going on between Nymphadora Tonks and Lupin and he doesn't like it. At ALL. One Shot.
"Where there was once fire, ashes remain."
Ashes
Severus sat down at the first meeting of the Order of the Phoenix. To his great displeasure, both Sirius and Remus were there, though the latter he didn't care much for. Severus sat back in the shadows and crossed his arms over his chest. Mostly all the members of the Order of the Phoenix had arrived. Or at least, the room was getting filled rapidly. He was not actually sure how many would be arriving and he wasn't sure that the shabby kitchen in Number 12 Grimmauld place would hold all the members of the Order.
El tiempo pasa y pasa
Y yo sigo asi
Queriendo te en mis brazos
Sin poderte tener
Y busco una salida
Para no ver me asi
Hay que lejos de mi lado
Tu amor ha estado en mi
Severus looked up from his thoughts as he felt someone fall on him, or on the floor before him. His eyes narrowed on the small figure that placed its small hand on his knee to get up. He hated it when people violated his personal space. At that moment the person looked up and black eyes widened in what seemed to be horror.
As Severus realized who was staring at him, he felt a tinge of pain that there was horror written on her features. He gently clasped her hand in his as he stood up and helped her to her feet. She stood up and stared at him blushingly. Her violently purple hair was starting to turn pink at its roots. The heart shaped face was completely the only thing that nearly never changed about her ever-changing appearance.
He could still remember a time, when he just started teaching at Hogwarts, after she'd left the school at the completion of her second NEWT year, how he felt that he could not go on without her. It seemed that with every moment that passed by that he would want to hold her in his arms like he did on those long nights in winter. He hated not being able to hold her. For many years he tried to find some way to stop the way that he felt, but to no avail. There was always a rain cloud following him everywhere he went.
"I'm very sorry, I tripped," Tonks said as she looked into his eyes. He stared deep into her eyes as he let go of her eyes. He was pleased to see that after all these years; she was still much shorter then he was. He stared at her unsmilingly, he had no will to smile anymore. The closest thing to a smile that would ever grace his face anymore was a smirk.
"Yes I can see that. I thought you would've grown out of your clumsiness, quite obviously you have not," Severus said as he stared down at her. She sighed as she looked up into his eyes unsmilingly.
"I can see that you have not grown out of being snide either. Perhaps if you could, things would not have ended as they did," Tonks said as she turned away from him and walked away. To his displeasure she chose a seat near Sirius Black and Remus J. Lupin.
Yo lloro y lloro
Al saber que no estas
Con mis labios
Mira mami yo te quiero besar
Y trato y trato
Por no sentir me asi
Pero es malo saber
Que ya no me quieres ami
Seeing Tonks again was definitely not something that he was planning on doing again. He wanted her buried in the past along with all his private shames. He didn't know how, but Tonks had managed to break through all his outer barriers and completely destroy him. She reduced him to tears once because that was simply how much he missed her.
There were times, in his sleep, were all he could think about was her lips and what it would be like to taste them one last time. He tried so hard throughout the years to push away those thoughts, especially since he was very much aware that she didn't love him anymore. Besides, he was slowly and steadily getting the picture that perhaps she was in love with someone else now and as the days passed by, it was becoming more evident with whom it was that she was falling in love with.
Every time that he would see them together he would have to grit his teeth and try his best to ignore them. But how do you ignore the women, the only one you have ever loved and that has ever loved you in return, flirting with a man your age that you despise, a creature actually. Severus didn't understand how she could still like him, knowing what he was. Severus wondered how he had fallen in love with her to begin with. She was a clumsy, average, trouble making Griffindor. There wasn't anything other then her being a metamorphmagus that was special about her. Yet he was in love.
He wondered how it was that she did not love him anymore. He was her first, how could she so easily cast him aside like that? Severus turned away from the sight of Tonks feeding Remus ice cream in his mouth. He didn't even know what he was in Grimmauld. Dumbledore said that after that night in the Ministry that no one should go to Grimmauld for it was not known whether or not Grimmauld would pass to Harry or to Bellatrix. He figured that the only reason that he was there was because Dumbledore specifically asked for him to make sure that nothing was left behind in Grimmauld. Personally, he would have preferred if they could just leave Remus and Tonks behind. He shook his head. Shouldn't they be in mourning because they lost Black instead of sitting at a table flirting with each other?
"Are you two merely going to sit there making puppy eyes at each other or are you actually going to do what you were sent here to do?" he asked as he stared at them. They were sitting at the kitchen table and they both looked over at him. Tonks' eyes narrowed as she looked over at him but Remus seemed slightly flustered by the comment, but he kept his cool.
"If you wish Severus, we could finish up here and you can go," Remus said as he looked over at him. Severus got off the wall that he was leaning on.
"So be it, I have better things to do with my time," he said as he opened the door of the kitchen and stormed out of the room. He was getting so sick and tired of the two lovebirds.
Mira
Como estoy sufriendo
Me quemo por dentro
Por sentir tu amor
Severus stormed up the stairs and made his way across the dreary hallway of Number 12 Grimmauld place. As he made his way towards the door, he heard the sound of someone following him. He slowly turned around and saw that Tonks was making her way over to him. He turned around once more and opened the door of Grimmauld and walked out, closely followed by Tonks.
"Severus, we need to talk," Tonks said as she stood behind him on the bright and sunny day. He slowly turned around and stared over at her with a raised brow. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked over at her, wondering what it was that she wanted. "What's wrong with you? You've acting far more of a misanthropist then what is usual of you."
Severus stared at her and looked around. As far as the eye could see there were no muggle around to witness what was happening. He wondered if perhaps she was so thick that she did not see what was wrong with him or if perhaps he was just that good at cloaking his emotions? Could she truly not see that he was suffering? Could she truly not see that he was burning inside for her? Well if she couldn't see, he was certainly not going to say anything to her. It was not in his nature to speak of anything personal.
"I didn't know that you knew the definition of misanthrope. Bravo Tonks, I truly feel safe knowing that they allow people like you to become Aurors," he said sarcastically as his words dripped with disdain as he stared at her. He turned away from her and was about to walk away before he heard the word SNAPE ringing in his ears as she called him out by his surname. She only did this when she really wanted to get his attention or when she was pissed. He stopped in his tracks but did not want to turn around and face her.
Mami
No me hagas eso
Sabes que te quiero
Con todo el corazon
"You can't hide what you feel Severus, I know that my relationship with Remus bothers you, but you need to get over it. What happened between us is in the past and you need to let it go," He heard Tonks saying to him. He closed his eyes tight at the sound of the words. No, what was she doing to him? She knew that he was in love with her with every piece of his black heart, how could she ask him to move on? He just hoped that she would not say what he dreaded would one day spill forth from her lips.
Te amo y te extraño
Quiero verte junto a mi
Abrasado de las manos
Y estar junto a ti
Pero me mata la conciencia
Al saber que no esta aqui
Oh baby why you gotta be doing this to me
Severus stood with his back to her. He opened his eyes. He loved her and he missed her. He wanted her by his side and he wanted to hold her small hands in his once more, but he couldn't. "What are you doing to me?" he whispered.
"What?" she said. He turned around to face her and saw that she was staring at him.
"I said what are you doing to me?" he said as he stared over at her. He walked closer to her and looked down into her eyes.
Me duele tanto saber
Que ya no eres para mi
Y ese lindo cuerpesito
Que contigo comparti
Me duele tanto saber
Que ya no eres para mi
Te extraño
"Look at what you have done to me. Have you any notion of what it is like to know that you do not love me anymore? Have you any idea what kind of pain that is? And these memories will simply not cease to run through my head when I am awake of asleep. I keep dreaming about your first time and sharing that petite little figure of yours and the pain of never being able to hold you or know that you are no longer for me makes me miss you and hurt even more," he then stopped himself and took a step away from her. She was staring up at him with wide eyes.
"Sev?"
Hay amor
Como me duele
Estar sin ti
Tu no me amas
"It hurts Tonks to not be with you, but I get it. You don't love me. I understand you would prefer an animal," he said as if spitting poison as he stared at her. All love in his heart was fading and turning black as he could finally begin to feel hate spreading into one of the last planes in his heart hat could still feel love. He walked away, turned on the spot and disappeared. With Tonks went anything that seemed human within him.
Authors Note: Well that's it. I really hope you liked this one. Please leave a review, comment on something please.
