House Mates

Disclaimer: Why would I own Naruto If I'm doing this? xD

Luna: My updating sucks... ehh, but I have some good news. That's right... DUN DUN DUN!

R.E.V.A.M.P.!

Naruto: OMG. -squees-

Sasuke: -squees aswell-

Luna: o.o ...My revamp is still gonna be bad I bet. xD BTW, I HATE BIG BROTHER WITH PASSION! ...So I figured writing a fanfic with Naruto characters going in the show would be more awesome. ...Okay, maybe not.

Pairings:
The pairings will be everywhere for this fic... consider it to give you a wide variety of uhh different types of couples.
I think that's my biggest danger in writing this fic...
Because someone might LOVE SasuSaku for instance, but then the next chapter, Sasuke could be paired with Ino.
(Hah, like that would happen. ...Then again, it's possible.)
...-expects to lose lots of readers- xD

REMEMBER TO RE-READ THIS CHAPTER EVEN IF YOU READ THE OLD ONE.
THERE'LL BE MAJOR CHANGES!

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"Oooh, I got mail! ...Oi Sakura-chan, what the heck is a 'Big Brother'?"

"Agh, Idiot!"

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"...Ne, be a good boy and get the mail! ...Why do I hear crunching noises? AHH, AKAMARU! I bet you ruined my Hentai maga- I mean..."

"WHAT?"

"Er, um... Ooh, what's this! ...Big Brother? Gah, I hate that lame show."

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"A-Ah, there seems to be mail for me and Neji-niisan... B-Big Brother? ...N-N-Neji-niisan always forbidded me to watch that show..."

"Hinata-sama? ...Is that Big Brother? I thought I forbidded you to watch that-! ..Eh? It seems we both have invitations to it..."

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"...What the hell? This is the same mail Naruto had..."

"OH SASUKE-KUNNN! I heard you got an invitation to Big Brother, ne?! This is gonna be soooo fun! I got one TOO!"

"Oh yeah, Forehead-girl?! Well I got one ASWELL! So don't bother going near him!"

"INO-PIG!"

'...EEEEEEEKKK!!'

Sasuke now had suddenly awakened his Inner.

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"Yosh! Big Brother!"

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"AND WELCOME TO A NEW YEAR OF BIG BROTHER! I'M YOUR NEW HOST, GAI!"

...Chirp, chirp.

"I liked the old host better!", yelled a member of the audience. "She was HOT!"

Gai struck a pose in his green tuxedo and jumped up onto a blue couch, which was meant for the guests. "Well, whoever this old host was, I'm sure she spent most of her youth! I am your new host from now on!"

SPLAT!

Gai started to get splattered in fruit and vegetables.

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10 Minutes Later...

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Gai nursed his head using another ice pack. "Hmm... I never knew that pumpkins could do that much damage. This is a splendid new discovery! I should inform my student, Lee-"

"WE LOVE YOU, KAKASHI!"

Gai suddenly turned around from backstage and noticed his eternal rival; Kakashi, was getting his fame and glory! The nerve! He had to do something!

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"I'm sorry, Gai! But Kakashi seems to have more of a... flow with the audience! From now on, you'll just have to stick with co-hosting!" The manager of the program took a bite out of his danish. "Anyway, Kakashi seems to have more of a friendly nature when he hosts..."

Gai was stunned!

Flowing? Friendly? Gai was all about flowing friendlyness! (If only he realised the two things were seperate matters...)

He would find a way to get back at Kakashi... somehow.

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"Ahh, I wonder if they have ramen in the Big Brother house..."

"Quit drooling, idiot."

"Shut up, Sasuke-teme!", Naruto retorted. "I can't help that ramen is sooo delicious, and beautiful, and the best thing in the world!!" Lovey hearts began to come out of Naruto's eyes as he began drooling once more. "If ramen was a person- I bet ya that you would get a nosebleed just looking at it! Oh and not to mention- OW!" Naruto cried, sobbing at the new lump on his head that Sasuke had given him.

"We have to leave in five minutes, idiot, so stop wasting our time," Sasuke demanded, "Oh, and you should get dressed into some proper clothes."

Sasuke was wearing a simple pair of pants with a shirt.

Naruto was wearing a simple pair of underwear.

"Fine! But you better not leave without me!" He disappeared into his bedroom (don't get ideas, people! xD).

"As much as I'd like to leave, we still have to wait for Sakura...", muttered Sasuke.

'But we don't care about Naruto OR Sakura! Let's just leave!'

'Kakashi said there'd be a certain punishment if I didn't wait for them.'

'Oh yeah! ...I'd rather read Kakashi's books than wait for these two idiots, though!'

The thought filled Sasuke with unthinkable terror.

Ironic, ne?

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"So, shall we welcome our new members of the House? Let's bring our first guest... Uh, Hinata?" Kakashi went to check if his list was right. From what he had heard, the show ended up with many disturbing things... Hinata's too innocent for this!

...Eh, wasn't his problem.

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Half an hour later...

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Hinata stared at the alcoholic drinks that were sitting right next to her on a huge red couch. She was currently in the waiting room, waiting for all the other housemates to join her.

But those drinks...

It was as if they were glaring at her, practically screaming 'DRINK ME!!'.

Never- never in her life, in her sixteen years, she had never had any alcohol. Yet, maybe she was supposed to drink it... after all, they look like they were intentionally left there for the housemates to 'enjoy'... But there had been many stories on what happens to alcoholics... They end up living with no life, losing their money, many losing their - dare she think it? - She could very well lose her 'innocents'. (As Hiashi told her)

But, Hinata was brave now. So, taking up the last of her courage, she extended her hand towards one of the bottles and opened it.

She took a sip. And another. One more. Hm, maybe just two more. Ohohoho, more!

...Hinata had made a new friend called alcohol!

'Sniff, you made me disappointed!', echoed Neji's voice in her head.

...Well, one thing's for sure; it was making her hear voices.

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A few minutes ago...

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Neji opened the door to the waiting room, nodding to the bouncer. As soon as he walked in there, he saw the most sad sight. His dear Hinata-sama was drinking!

He wiped a tear from his cheek, sniffling. "Sniff, you made me disappointed!", he wailed.

Apparently, Hinata was thinking that OC Neji was basically just a side-effect from the drink. So she ignored it.

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Meanwhile...

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"Well, if Sakura and Ino can't decide who will go first in the interview, shall we interview you both at the same time?"

"NO!", they screamed.

Kakashi sweat dropped. "Well, er, let's just try this... Okay, first question: What is your reason for wanting to enter the house?"

Ino and Sakura suddenly had lovey-hearts in their eyes. "Sasuke-kunnn!", they sighed dreamily. Seeing this, they both growled at each other and now had flames in their eyes. "Why you-!"

Kakashi sweat dropped again.

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"This is troublesome... Why did you drag me here, Chouji?", Shikamaru questioned. Both him and Chouji were making their way to the waiting room after being interviewed.

The teen continued happily munching on a bunch of potato chips. "Free food. And I thought it'd be pretty boring to enter by myself, so I entered you in as well."

Shikamaru sighed. "This is going to be troub-"

"H-Hinata! Please, listen to your Niisan! Now just put down the drink!", cried a sober Neji.

Shikamaru and Chouji paused and looked at each other.

"Hinata drinking?"

"Neji crying?"

They both curiously opened the door, greeting the bouncer quickly.

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.

Chouji was wondering what type of food they had in there.

There was Hinata dancing on a couch, whilst Neji kept trying to grab her and calm her down.

She swooned as Neji caught her, and looked at his face dreamily. She then frowned. "You're not Narutoooo-kunnn! GET AWAY!" She then threw some alcohol her unfortunate shocked cousin and skipped out of his arms. Chouji made his way over to the couch (and is sadly wondering why there was no food, sniff), whilst Shikamaru just kept staring at the current situation, leaning against the wall.

"H-H-Hinata! Please!" Neji had to admit to himself though, he was starting to sound like Hinata when she's sober. Of course, that's because Hinata is a very crazy drunk, and it's very dangerous for her to be drunk when she's about to share a house with about... twelve people?

"OMG, Sasuke-teme, look! HINATA, NEJI, SHIKAMARU AND CHOU- what the heck?"

Neji turned around, still looking worried.

Naruto stared at him and Hinata crazily. "Why is it like Hinata and Neji have swapped bodies? OOOH, maybe it's like on those shows! HEY, HINATA!" Naruto exclaimed, waving to Neji. Neji just glared at Naruto before going back to trying to calm Hinata down.

Sasuke was standing there, munching on a tomato. Neji's behaviour wasn't anything new, but Hinata acting crazy-like made him slightly amused.

Chouji's eyes lit up at the sight of the tomato Sasuke had been eating. "F-FOOD!"

Munch. Gulp.

Chouji's eyes started to form tears as he watched the dear tomato being eaten. Sniffle, he was hungry! And all there was... was alcohol. Hm. Then again, drinks can be a good replacment for food.

He turned to look beside him, eyeing the bottles strangely.

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Ten minutes later...

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"C-Chouji, listen to Shikamaru, okay? Now just PUT THE BOTTLE DOWN!"

"W-What are you doing, Hinata? ...Is that Chouji's underwear on your head?"

Sasuke and Naruto mentally shuddered.

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A/N: I found this in my Documents section and decided to submit it, since I wanted to revamp it quickly, I'll try to update it soon! I wanted to submit it because I'm on a roll... I've done three chapters in about one or two days (two for my other story, "More Than One Way", and this one... yayyy! Oh, and review!