Author's Note: Here you go. A little Kid!Destiel! :) Slightly fluffy, but it gets a bit angsty at the end. Enjoy! :3
Sam sighs. How did he even get into this mess?
No, scratch that. He knows how it happened. It was Gabriel, stupid, stupid, pain-in-the-ass Gabriel. He just had to come back from the dead and force Sam to take care of… this.
Two five year olds chasing each other around on a playground. One of them has wings.
One hour earlier…
For once, they have a few days of rest between cases. It's 3PM and Dean is sprawled out on his motel bed, absentmindedly flicking through the cheesy soap operas playing on the old television before choosing one. Cas is perched beside him, head tilted and eyes squinting comically at the screen. Sam is watching them both with amusement, seeing how well they fit together, happy to just be near each other. He can't comprehend how they're not together yet.
Everything is fine until there's a flutter of wings and the light bulbs all explode simultaneously while the TV goes dark. Then a whiny voice echoes through the darkened space.
"You've got to be kidding me." A snap of fingers and the lights are all on again, good as new. The archangel Gabriel has appeared right in between the two beds and grinning with a little twinkle in his eyes that Sam doesn't trust. "Hello, boys!"
"Gabriel?" Cas frowns and hops off the bed. "I thought you were dead."
"I thought I was, too, but God seems to have other plans for me."
"What do you want from us?" Sam asks skeptically.
"I don't want anything from you," Gabriel drawls, looking pointedly at Sam. "The real question is, what do I want with them?"
"Wait, us? What the hell would you want with me and Cas?" Dean points a finger at his chest for emphasis.
"To learn a lesson! See you whenever I decide, kiddos!" Gabriel snaps his fingers again, grins impudently, and disappears.
Sam begins to yell, "what the hell was that?" but his voice catches in his throat as he stares at where Cas and Dean used to be. Two little kids are staring at him with wide eyes, one pair unmistakably green and the other unmistakably blue. And then there's the pair of charcoal gray wings sprouting from the blue-eyed one.
"Cas? Dean?"
There's a pause and then the two - kidified, Sam thinks - boys squeal "Sammy!" in unison and run towards him, hugging his legs. "Can you take us out to play?"
GABRIEL! Sam groans inwardly. You son of a BITCH!
Sam does end up driving them to a park and sits on a bench, mulling over his options. As far as he can tell, it's like they've just been shot back in time – they know what monsters are and how hunting works, they just think that Sam has always been their caretaker and don't know any of the things that have happened in Sam's life like the apocalypse and everything, and Cas seems like he's been on earth ever since he was born. In fact, they seem happier than they've ever been, carefree and innocent, like… well, like children.
Sam wonders vaguely why he can suddenly see Cas's wings. Maybe they can only hide them when they're older. Or maybe little Cas is more trusting than when he's older and lets the Winchesters see them. Nobody noticed anything strange about him on the drive there except for the fact that he's still wearing a (now miniature) trench coat and suit. He has to admit, it's kind of cute.
He watches as Dean giggles hysterically and chases the also laughing baby angel around the structure that's thankfully empty of children. It's winter, so they have whole entire park to themselves. After a while, they both collapse onto the grassy hill beside the sand pit and sit together. The two companions lie on their backs and look at the clouds.
(POV change – third person – Cas and Dean)
Dean grins and points up at the sky. "Look, Cas! It's a turtle!"
"And that one's a sailboat!"
"That one looks like a whale!"
"A whale? That's an apple, silly!"
"No, Dean, it's a WHALE! Look at the flippers!"
"Oh, fine! But that one's an angel, see?"
"No, it's more of a moth."
"No, it's an angel."
"Moth!"
"Angel!"
"Moth!"
"You know how I know it's an angel?" Dean says, looking shyly over at Cas.
"How?"
"Because it's got cool wings and I like the way it looks."
Cas is wide-eyed and silent for a while. "Oh." After a moment, he speaks again, shyly, "Then that one's a human, because it has a cool jacket and it's nice."
Dean reaches out a hand and the Castiel grasps it in his own and they both smile. "I like you, Cas."
"I like you too." They sit up and Cas's little wings flutter happily.
Dean stares at them unabashedly. "Can I… can I touch them?"
"I… okay. Just be careful." Cas is blushing furiously as Dean reaches out a hand to run his fingers along the soft feathers. The little bits of paler down at the bas of the wings feel incredibly soft, and Dean can't decide which he likes better – that, or the smooth, sleek, still growing flight feathers. He can feel Cas shivering beneath his touch and Dean stops. "Sorry."
"No, it's… it's fine," Castiel squeaks. Dean continues and pulls slightly on the feathers, watching Cas's reaction. The little angel's blue eyes are still way too wide, but not in pain, so Dean doesn't stop. It's only when there's another squeak that Dean pauses. Sam turns around to see what's happening.
(Sam's POV)
"Hey, Dean, don't pull on his wings!" Sam can't believe that Dean would invade the angel's privacy like that. To his utter surprise, Cas just folds his wings behind his back and pipes up,
"No, I don't… he let me!" Dean protests.
Sam is dumbfounded. "Cas, is that true?"
"Yes," Cas says shyly. "As long as he doesn't pull too hard."
He's speechless. Sam never would have guessed that this was how they'd end up getting together… but hey, who's he to judge? This whole thing is a mess anyhow.
"Okay. Um, how about we get back to the motel now?"
To his utter surprise, they come willingly. However, they both straggle behind on the way back to the car, and when Sam looks back, they're rolling down the hillside, parallel to the ground and giggling hysterically. At the end, Cas and Dean end up entangled and squealing in laughter. Sam has to admit, it's pretty damn cute!
"Come on you two! You're going to get dirty!" Too late – they're already coated with mud, grass, and leaves from their little trip. He sighs.
(Third person POV again)
Dean squeals happily when Sam chases him around the motel room. Cas looks slightly amused but also afraid, standing obediently in the bathroom already. Dean doesn't need a bath! It satisfies him to see Sam frantically trying to catch up with Dean, who's much more agile with his smaller body. Eventually, Sam resorts to desperate measures and throws his jacket over Dean, who instantly trips. His older brother swoops him up before he can fall. Dean laughs hysterically as Sam tickles him all over, and eventually gives in and allows him to guide him into the bathroom.
"Okay, you two, it's bath time for real now." Sam looks pointedly at Dean, who had fled when he announced it earlier. Dean drops his gaze to his mud-covered shoes.
When Sam begins to strip off the little boys' layers, neither child minds. At first, they are both confused when Sam leaves on their shorts for a bath, but they don't ask.
(Sam)
Secretly, Sam just really doesn't want to see them both naked and in the same tub together – and he knows that Dean would be furious when he went back to normal.
At first, it's a normal bath. Sam fills the tub up with hot water and carefully lifts Cas and Dean into the bathtub. He realizes too late that it was a bad idea to just hand them shampoo bottles, and soon, the whole tub is filled with foam. Sam sighs heavily when he realizes that he's really going to have to work at this. He decides to start with Dean and thoroughly washes out the boy's hair, half-smiling at the annoyed expression on his brother's face. He feels incredibly weird doing this, not knowing what emotions he's supposed to have about his older brother suddenly being younger and now he has to give him a bath.
Dean sees Sam's moment of pause and takes the opportunity to extract his hands from his hair. Sam just forces him to dunk under the water to rinse out, and Dean emerges looking like a drowned rat again.
Next, Sam just hands Dean a washcloth and instructs him, "You know how to use this – if I find any more dirt on you, no pie for you tonight!" Dean looks like a kicked puppy and gets to work.
Now he's faced with the troubling task of having to wash a baby angel. Cas stares up at him with those wide blue eyes, just waiting. That's when Sam stops to think. Cas has never had to actually take a bath. Even as a child, he'd just have had other angels to work their mojo on him… This should be interesting.
"Okay, Cas, I'm just going to wash your hair. You've got to get it wet first, though. Just hold your breath and go underwater." Sam watches carefully as the angel does as he was told and emerges looking no less dirt-caked but a lot less dry.
Carefully, Sam runs his fingers through Cas's soaked hair, shampoo suds floating down from his head every once in a while. He basically goes through the same thing as he did with Dean, except for that he helps Cas with the washcloth, but then when Castiel turns around in the tub, he suddenly remembers that Cas, being an angel, has wings. Which just so happen to be covered in twigs and mud. Great.
Now, Sam is stumped. Most of the cute little angel's wings are already somewhat wet, but apparently the oils on them prevent them from being soaked through. He has no idea how soap will affect them, and is guessing that they're normally just groomed by other angels or, when he's older, by his mojo or his own hands. Sam just sits there staring at this problem until Dean moves forward in the warm water and starts to pick at the wings.
Sam starts to protest, but stops when he sees that Cas looks perfectly content to allow his friend to (rather carefully, Sam notices) clean out his wings.
(Cas and Dean)
Dean doesn't know why he does it, only that he does. He simply feels the need to help out Cas, and to… well, to touch his wings again, not only because of his own fascination, but because Cas seems to enjoy it, and he needs help. So Dean gently moves his fingers through the soft, deep gray feathers, shifting the gunk out of the way. Eventually, he gets most of the bigger pieces out, and then Dean begins to gingerly bring water up to the feathers and rub them in between his fingers, getting all of the tiny grains of dirt and mud out. When he's nearly done, Cas shakes his wings out, a shiver going through every individual feather, causing water droplets to spew across the room and flinging off the last bits of dirt. Then Cas folds them up neatly and looks over his shoulder at Dean, who smiles.
Castiel feels so much better now, cleaner than he's felt in a while, though he's not sure why. He looks at Dean and suddenly feels something strange, different, in his heart. Then he shakes it off and he's once again an unsuspecting little child. Dean beams at the angel and says, "All done! Come on, let's get out!"
Without asking for Sam's help, Dean clambers out of the bathtub and Cas follows a bit too soon. They end up in a pile on the floor, giggling. The two of them disentangle and Sam has to work pretty hard to get them good and dry. Eventually, he can't avoid the problem of the wet underwear, so he simply lets them wear their previous clothes over them. Cas looks uncomfortable but Dean doesn't mind much, except for that he's a bit cold.
Sam lets them run around in the motel for another hour, much to their happiness. First, Cas decides to play hide and seek. The first place that Dean thinks to hide is underneath the bed, which only takes a few minutes to guess. Then it's Castiel's turn. Dean looks almost everywhere and can't find him.
Dean ponders his choices. Suddenly, he's angry. "CAS, THAT'S AGAINST THE RULES, YOU CAN'T GO OUTSIDE!" He's about to charge through the door when he hears a little voice muttering, "But I'm not outside."
The boy freezes in his footsteps. "Cas, where are you?" He whips around to see a flicker in the open (and empty) closet, where he'd already checked.
Unexpectedly, the little angel is suddenly visible, looking somewhat drained, and sat in the corner of the wardrobe. "I've never done that before," Cas says shakily, looking scared.
Sam walks over to stand next to Dean and crouches in front of Cas. "Hey buddy, looks like you're getting a hold of your mojo. It's time for dinner, both of you." He hands them both hamburgers, which they quickly devour.
(Sam)
All of a sudden, Sam finds himself standing between two extremely sleepy little kids. Sighing heavily once more, he helps them out of their top layers, leaving them in their underwear and two of (normal sized) Dean's old shirts. They look ridiculous but don't seem to mind. And then Sam has another dilemma.
"Would you two mind… um… sharing a bed?"
(Dean and Cas)
Dean looks up at his brother in annoyance. "Of course not, Sammy! Cas is my friend!"
Cas nods vigorously.
"Okay then you two. Bedtime."
For once, Dean doesn't mind being told what to do. He's exhausted, and he doesn't really know why, but he doesn't care, just as long as he can sleep soon and Cas is with him. In a few more minutes, the lights are switched off, Sam is in the corner with his laptop, and Dean and Cas are lying in the bed, side by side.
It's in the moments before he falls asleep that Dean feels something shifting in his child's mind. A heavy weight is beginning to lower itself onto his shoulders once more, and the younger version of himself is feeling afraid and alone and exposed, but then he feels an arm curling around him, a warm body pressing against his back, and soft breath caressing his neck.
"It's okay," Cas murmurs.
They both fall asleep feeling more comfortable and relaxed than they've been in years.
(Sam, briefly)
He opens his eyes for a moment, late at night, to see an adult's body in Dean's bed. Sam is momentarily confused and then smiles.
Thank you, Gabriel.
A warm laugh touches his consciousness, like a hand brushing across his arm, flickering against his mind, and then the archangel is gone. Sam drifts back to sleep with a silly grin plastered on his face.
(Dean)
Blurred. Everything is blurred.
Memories slowly rotate around, giving me only small glimpses of events that I can't fully decipher.
A dark feather, floating down to touch a pool of water.
Silence, broken by a child's laughter. It strikes a chord of familiarity.
I wonder why.
Sand. Climbing up a metal structure, racing back down. A flash of innocent, wide blue eyes.
Wings. Dark, half-fledged. Beautiful.
Darkness infiltrated by a ray of light as fabric is lifted before my eyes, to reveal a young, smiling face – I recognize it, but from where? – and a voice squeaking out "I found you!"
Then there's fear, and then warmth, and then contentment.
Dean surfaces to full consciousness slowly. For a moment, he just lays there, wondering what the hell just happened. Then he detects something strange.
His back is warm, yet his front is not, despite the blanket encasing him on the motel bed. He thinks for a moment and then stiffens.
Who the fuck is in my bed?
A familiar scent tickles his nostrils, a faint hint of pine and mountain air, and somehow of feathers.
Cas?
Dean almost sits up and then realizes that he doesn't mind.
Why don't I mind? This is fucking WEIRD.
But it's good.
It's really good.
He realizes that it's because he feels safe. Really, truly, completely safe, for once. His body slowly relaxes, and then he falls asleep again.
Dean opens his eyes to a shaft of sunlight creeping from behind closed drapes, and thinks, that was the weirdest dream, EVER. Cas is still holding him, which is still okay, somehow. But the dream?
Then he looks at the ground by the bed and sees a few deep gray feathers, edged with down. The remains of a burger and splashes of mud decorate the carpet, like little needles bringing him back to reality.
Oh god.
Now Dean remembers Gabriel, waving his fingers and disappearing, and then suddenly feeling warm and safe and then waking from a dream that he'd been reverted back to a child with Castiel.
That wasn't a dream, apparently.
Dean reflects on the experience, and lets out a shaky breath. It felt good to be a kid again, to let everything go.
Stripped bare of all shields, he had been free to express all of his feelings on his face and in his motions, just have freedom, no secrets. The weight on his shoulders was lessened, for once. And it was Cas that did this.
Castiel had made him smile, made him laugh, made him cry. Made tears stream down his face in the pitch black of the night, wondering simply, why, why had he betrayed Dean, why had he done what he did.
And some part of him had always known that Cas had done it all for him.
And he was grateful. He hadn't wanted to admit it, because he saw the destruction that Castiel had caused, but every molecule in his body wanted to forgive Cas, because he had such sad hope in his eyes, such devotion, and Dean always felt the angel's eyes boring into him when he wasn't looking, and nobody saw Dean's little glances back, nobody felt the intense heat that was carried in his gaze, the care that he had around Cas. It was all in the eyes, nothing more. The only reason that he had ever pushed Cas away when he was too close to him was because he was afraid of attachment. He did not deserve love, he thought, and he doesn't want to hurt Cas's fragile heart.
As much as he was annoyed with Gabriel, he was also glad for what he did, because it helped Dean recognize that Cas was already close, and he just had to take the next step. That, he realizes, will be the hardest part. Dean's stomach knots at the thought.
What am I even doing?
It's still too much for his mind to wrap around, but he supposes that the very first step will have to be a small one – to have an open mind.
I'm going to try this, or at least try to accept it, he tells himself. But I'm going to take very, very, VERY tiny steps. Take it slow. Yeah, that'll make this easier. Dean lets out a slow breath, and suddenly, Cas's arm coils tighter around his waist, and the air hitches in his throat.
The angel makes a little sleepy noise, and Dean's expression softens a little bit and he allows himself to sink deeper into the mattress and Cas at the same time.
"Dean?" Cas's voice is a low, half-awake rumble, vibrating against Dean's back.
"Cas," Dean breathes out. "You okay?"
"Yes. I… I remember. And you?"
"Yeah."
For a full minute, they're both silent. Then Cas starts to speak, haltingly. "I… Dean… Is this… is this okay?" Pause. "Personal space?"
"Yeah… No, it's… it's fine. It's good."
"Okay." Breathing. Slight shift in weight. Bed creaking.
Content. Somehow, just the breaths are enough to make them happy, Cas curled around Dean's form and holding him comfortingly.
Cas, do you still hear my thoughts if I think them… at you like this?
To Dean's surprise, something enters his mind. Yes.
Oh.
Is there something you wanted to say?
Yeah. Um, well… this is… this is the safest I've ever felt since Dad and then Bobby died. Safer, actually. Thanks.
It's my pleasure. Dean senses a slight amusement. Hesitantly, Cas brushes his lips against Dean's neck. Always happy if it makes you happy.
Dean breathes out again. Out loud, he murmurs, "Thank you, Cas. For everything."
"Everything?" The word is heavy with unsaid thoughts. Even after I betrayed you? Cas holds his breath, waiting for a reply.
"Yeah. I forgive you."
"Thank you." Cas lets all of his emotions spill out this time, and feels a wave of content rippling off of Dean. After Cas made contact with Dean in his mind, he's more attuned to his feelings, but Dean doesn't feel Cas's in return, since he's human. However, Cas doesn't mind. As long as Dean is with him and safe in his arms, it doesn't matter.