Disclaimer: This story will primarily focus on Haru/ Rin. The only other paring will be Rin and a girl that I make up. The other characters are just there for support.

CHAPTER 1

Distance…..

There were two types

The first Physical

The other Emotional

Both of which keep me away from you

I'm so wrapped up in my thoughts that my sense of time is slipping. Seconds, minutes, hours are all a blur. To be labelled as someone of few words, my minds is racing with thoughts, questions, and concerns all about him. I barely feel myself walk down the aisle. Legs and arms moving on instinct. I take my place behind him. Makoto, Rei, Nagisa, Sousuke, and Nitori take their places behind me and thus my torment begins.

My ears perk as the pastor asks if anyone objects. With vigour I raise my hand, and shout 'Yes, I do'….Ha if only. My heart won't let me do something like that to him. Today is his special day, not mine. It's not about me and my feelings. I've had countless opportunities to tell him how my heart felt. That time in when we were in high school and he came to my house in tears when his first girlfriend cheated. He said, 'Haru you would never do something like this. You would always be loyal. Why can't I find someone like you'? Or that time in the hotel just a few weeks ago, with his head resting on my lap he quietly whispered 'Do you love me'? He waited in silence for an answer, but one never came. I suddenly found beating of the rain on the window pane more interesting. Yet another perfect opportunity ruined by my silence. Even now as the pastor waits with anticipation for someone, anyone to speak up, I remain silent. The pastor moves on, and I ponder whether I just lost the last chance I will ever get.

The next few hours. No. Seconds. No. Minutes pass and then she speaks. The rhinestones on her cream coloured dress, glisten like the tears in the corners of her eyes. She speaks of an undying love for him and paints picture of a beautiful future filled with love and prosperity and a white picket fence. She is absolutely beautiful, stunning rather. But not in comparison to the man standing across from her. She finishes her speech and we move on.

My ears are trained to his deep voice. The second he opens his mouth, my world seems to make sense again. My eyes meet the back of his tuxedo and I find myself staring in awe at the man in front of me. His hair usually a dishevelled mess, now combed thoroughly and tucked behind his ears. Black polyester cascading down his broad shoulders, highlighting the curve of his back and continuing down his long legs and toned arse. My halt their travel at his legs. They were always the part of him that got to me. Though he hasn't swam for years, his legs still have the definition of a swimmer. Polyester teasing me as it wraps around his legs like a vice, bring my attention to every muscle. Abductors, Biceps, Hamstrings, oh my. I am suddenly jealous of his suit and want nothing but to rip it off. He cleans up nicely, but I like him best in his swim suit. His voice suddenly stops and I am brought back to reality.

His muscles tense as he struggles to find his words. On instinct, I place a hand on his back. Ruby eyes meet mine and I feel his muscles relax under my touch. He finds his words and directs his attention to her. I can feel the distance between myself and him growing the longer he speaks. He says 'You are wonderful' and we grow 1,000 feet apart. He says 'you are special'; another 1,000 feet. He says 'I love you'; another 1,000 feet. He finishes with 'forever' and that seals the deal. I am forever chained to my position as best friend, as confidant; but never lover. For I'm not the one wearing the expensive white dress across from him. I merely stand in a tuxedo at his side. He takes her hand and I can't breathe. The room is suddenly spinning. My eyes zero-in on the tiny piece of gold resting in the palm of his hand. My chest clenches as he slides it on her appendage. This is it. This my death and I welcome it with open arms. Sweat cascading down my brow, heart beating erratically, breathing laboured, I brace myself for what's coming next: The kiss.

We were always neck and neck in and out of the water, but he has strayed too far this time. He is too far out of my grasp. He doesn't just belong to me and our friendship anymore. He's taken on much more serious covenant: marriage. The pastor announces the three words I've been dreading all day. Kiss. The. Bride. Those three words echo in my ears and I feel my legs buckle beneath. I don't think I'm strong enough to watch this. Against my will, I feel myself reach out for him. I can almost feel his broad comforting shoulder, but he leans in instead.

Time stops as he moves in to seal the deal. Watching this scene play out before me, I so desperately wish I could find the pause button and come back to this when I was ready. This is the reality that I have chosen. I have lost him forever. I watch as the distance between their lips grows closer. 3 feet. I am drenched in sweat. 2 feet. My airways are closing down. 6 inches. My heart is beating out of my chest. 2 inches. My knees have given way. 1 inch. I close my eyes and brace for impact. I feel my muscles relax against the cool tile floor. I shut my eyes and dream of Rin.

Haru….….Haru... Are you alright?...Haru ….Wake Up!…..HARUKA….