HEYO! :D
It was like 12 or something in the morning and I was tired and something popped into my head.
So this is just a one shot. :)
She's nothing, just a temp from Chiswick, never left home, she's nothing, going nowhere, always going to stay nothing. She doesn't know she's the most important woman in the universe, she doesn't know that there's planets singing her praises, she doesn't know she's brilliant, she's fantastic and she's not allowed to remember, she's not allowed to know, if she knows, she burns.
She rolls out of bed every morning, reluctant, regretful. She puts a smile, an up curved frown, on her face, a mask, a cover. Somehow there's a twinkle in her eyes that always makes it look like they're smiling, they're not. Every morning she looks in the mirror and every morning she absolutely hates what she sees staring back.
She goes through the day, laughing, smiling, joking with everyone around her, but out of sight, out of mind, that laugh becomes a cry, the smile becomes a frown, the joke becomes the hell she finds herself living in.
At night, she wanders the house, unable to find sleep for every time she closes her eyes, she feels as if she's burning. She wanders until she collapses and in the morning, her granddad and her mother carry her back to bed before she wakes up, she never remembers the wandering. Those night time wanderings just add to the list of things she can't remember.
She shouldn't feel happy, standing on the edge of the cliff, looking down at the murky, rocky water below, she shouldn't feel alive, shouldn't feel like she's on top of the world. But she does and she doesn't know why, she doesn't know anything anymore.
She watches the water crashing against the rocks and she wonders how long it takes to hit the water from the cliff. She wonders if it should even matter, if the thought's meant to even register in her mind. She wonders if the shorter the fall the better, she wonders why she's here.
She feels eyes on her, worried and anxious, but she's not scared, panicked, she's going to step back from the edge any moment now, isn't she? Of course she is, she's not stupid, she's not suicidal! She knows she's got plenty to do in life, plenty to look forward to, she knows she's someone in this big world... but does she know? Does she really?
She wants to take a step forward, to take the plunge, she wants to, oh how she does, but she can't, she won't, she shouldn't...
She doesn't because she doesn't want to die, she just wants to feel alive, so every day for the rest of her life, she stands at the edge of a cliff, looks down at the water below and contemplates jumping. She never does.
A/N: I think I'm going to do more one shots just about Donna. I find it's fun! :D So anyways. R&R and all that jazz. DD out biatches!