For I Know the Plans I Have for You

Disclaimer: Don't own- these characters belong to the wonderful Catherine Marshall, who crafted such a beautiful story.

A/N: While I love the original story, for my purposes, I'm having it start where the TV show ended in that horrible cliff hanger!

Prologue- Choices Made

I fingered the velvet box that David had placed in my hands. It felt soft, so soft, almost like a baby's blanket. I focused on that sensation, letting myself get lost in thoughts. He expected an answer- he had waited for me to be ready. And yet, I didn't know what answer to give him. My heart ached, but not with love for David, though I did fancy him. No, if I forced myself to admit it, deep in the depths of my heart, the reason I felt so conflicted was what I saw at Neil's cabin. Why did I encourage Margaret to fight for him? Was I surprised that he gave in so easily? Why couldn't I just have left things the way they were? I knew the reason- because in spite of my feelings, it was the right thing to do. But if that was truly the case, why did it hurt so much? I contemplated these thoughts as I stroked the velvet box.

"Christy" David said, interrupting my thoughts, as his hand reaching out to grasp mine firmly. His voice pulled me back to reality and I forced my eyes up to look at him, quite aware of the warmth of his fingers threaded through mine.

"Be my wife. I've known it since the moment you stumbled into my arms your first night here. Please." His voice was pleading and I knew that I would be safe with David.

"I…" My voice was hoarse with emotion and tears prickled my eyes. In the distance, I heard the galloping of a horse and I turned my head to see who was responsible for the noise. It was Neil- I could tell from the anguished look on his face that he was pleading with me to understand. My heart quickened as I took a step towards him, my fingers still held tight by David's. His eyes rested on the box in my hand. I knew he knew what was happening as his face darkened ever so slightly and his steady gaze faltered. I felt his emotion as his shoulders slumped.

I gave him a weary look, my hands trembling. I cupped my free hand tightly around the box, squeezing it closed, trying to force my hand still. I was conscious to the fact that David could feel my hand shaking in his. What he thought at that moment, I was unsure. But at that same moment, I knew what Neil thought. He understood my predicament. I wasn't strong enough to make the decision. How ironic on so many levels- I came here and against all odds, survived. I built a home for myself among the people who seemingly worlds apart from myself, but whom after many trials, had accepted me. And yet, I wasn't strong enough to make this decision which would alter the course of my life. And Neil- most of the times, he was such a mystery to me. But finally, I was able to read him as clearly as he could read me all the time. In fact, he knew me so well; it infuriated me most of the time.

Neil knew that I couldn't make the choice in front of me. It was like I was paralyzed by indecision. I knew in my heart that Neil was married and that I couldn't give in to my feelings for him and still choose to follow God. But in that moment, my heart was torn and Neil knew that. He knew of my faith and that if I chose him, it would tear my often fragile faith apart. And much as he ridiculed my faith, he also knew that it was a part of me and that my turning away from it would destroy me. So, he made the decision for me. He tugged on the reigns, turning away from me.

My heart lurched. "NEIL!" I managed to get the word out and he stopped at the desperation in my voice. He turned back towards me.

"I'm sorry" I mouthed. "I'm sorry" Tears fell from my eyes.

Neil nodded and galloped away. It was a sound that would echo in my mind.

"Christy" David squeezed my hand. "It will be all right"

I nodded absently. "I do love you, David." I whispered. "I just don't know about anything anymore"

David pulled me closer to him until both of his arms were around me. "Let me help you." He whispered in my ear. "We will figure it out together. Just say you will marry me"

I pulled away from him and in his eyes, for perhaps the first time; I saw just how much he did love me. He reached up and wiped away my tears with his thumb.

I threw myself back into his arms. "Together" My voice was low, but I knew he heard because he swung me around and a cry escaped him. He put me down, knelt on one knee and slipped the ring on my finger. Jumping up, he pulled me closer until I could feel his breath on my face.

"David, the children" I whispered, but he silenced me as his lips pressed firmly against mine, leaving me breathless. The children hooted and hollered behind me.

The choice had been made. Now all I had to do was let myself go down that path. It all seemed so simple. Little did I know that the course chosen would be far from simple.