Got inspired by a fanfiction I read on tumblr, Atemu's final thoughts as he passes on to the afterlife. I bawled my eyes out, and then decided that I wanted to show Yuugi's thoughts in that same moment.
It's not fair that you have to leave for the afterlife.
And yet, it is.
It's so difficult to come to terms with that fact—the uncontrollable tears that slide over the caps of my cheeks seem to prove that as I watch you turn to the door—but I don't have much of a choice, do I, Pharaoh?
We've been partners for years now. You and I know each other more intimately than anyone in this world, what with sharing everything, from mind to body to soul together. The feeling of being forced to lose you sort of resembles what I felt when your soul was lost to me the moment I watched the Millennium Puzzle crumble before me. I was nearly engulfed with flames back then, but I refused to leave your side. I refused to die without seeing your kind face one more time. I had solved the puzzle again to save you, to keep you with me.
But I can't save you this time. I can't keep you with me, no matter the determination I feel, as I had then, to beg you to stay.
I can only imagine what you're feeling right now—the bond between us is broken now in which I can't tell. But surely your heart is as torn in this moment as mine is. The thought makes this parting even more unbearable.
My friends call out to you mere moments before you step through the light beyond the door. They also say it's not fair, they voice everything that I want to say. But it saddens me to admit that I cannot join in their pleas. That is not my place. That is none of our places. We came this far for a reason. You were never meant to stay in this world with us. From the very beginning, I had a feeling that a day like this would come… I never allowed myself to go in full depth of what it would mean, refusing to acknowledge… that one day, we would have to go our separate ways; for better or for worse. And now that I'm here, I grudgingly realize that it is for the better.
As my friends' cries continue, I stand silent and watch you. Your back is turned to us, but you haven't taken that extra step, listening to what they have to say. I can imagine your eyes closed, trying to process, yourself, what separation will mean for you… for all of us. We all know you're walking to your death. And when I really look at you, I can't help but think about how young you are. Sure, your spirit has lived in that puzzle for thousands of years, but you… Mou Hitori no Boku, you are so young. Just like the rest of us.
And yet again, I'm compelled to remind myself that you just don't belong here. Your physical life was, indeed, thousands of years ago. Your life ended thousands of years ago. You've been wandering aimlessly in this modern age, trying to figure out who you are and why you're here. The reason was this. That door that would allow your spirit to end its fatiguing journey and invite you to sweet rest, is the reason for my finding you. That has been my role since the moment I completed the Puzzle for the first time, although we both hadn't known it at the time.
The doors are wide open now, waiting. I vaguely wondered if there was a time limit. That if you waited too long, you would be trapped here forever. Life would go on for us as it normally has, but it would always remain in the back of our minds that when I died, you would be within the puzzle again: lonely, scared, empty, wandering. Everything we'd worked for up to this point would be thrown into an endless abyss.
I can't bear that thought. I can't stand the idea that you would have to watch me die someday, and I wouldn't be able to comfort you or give you any reason to be hopeful or uplifted. Your days chained to the puzzle would continue in a torturous cycle, and I wouldn't be able to solve the puzzle again to ensure that your efforts with me to go home weren't in vain.
Now at this point, it seems fairly logical to me why you must go, and why I must stay and live for you. You would want that, wouldn't you, Pharaoh? Even if it is separation, I know you'll be watching me somewhere up there with pride, not to mention that the separation is only temporary.
That's right. It's only for a short time. I'll live to however long I'm meant to live on this planet, and then I'll continue living… up there, with you. We'll be together for eternity. Eternity is a very, very long time. I let my lips curl into the smallest smile at that thought.
I remember what you told me so long ago… do you remember that night, Mou Hitori no Boku? The night a few days after I'd saved you from the fire: You told me you wanted to be with me forever. I remember those exact words. You smiled as you said it, and I agreed with such heartwarming emotion that yes, I wanted to be with you, too… forever. I was cradling the puzzle as if that I were to let go, you'd disappear. You reached over to touch your ghostly hands to mine, and you continued to smile.
When I remember those words, I understand that we aren't breaking our promise today. Someday, we will be together forever. I will personally see to it that happens.
I still continue to mourn your leaving from the tears in my eyes, but I'm smiling, and I close one of my hands into a fist. You still seem reluctant, but when I finally call out, "I won't forget you!"… You seem to have made your decision. You give us all a thumbs-up, our old sign, and walk into the light. You don't look back. I'm rather glad you didn't.
"Mou Hitori no… Boku…" I don't feel you with us anymore. Goodbye, for just a little while.