THIS IS AN A/N YO: 'kay? So this is my first fanfic, and it's from Lily's point of view in the story, and there are two other stories being written, one from Hayley's P.O.V, one from Lizzie's/Benny's. They can be found in my favourite stories :D

THIS AINT TF2, NO, IT'S AN ARMS RACE: Lily

"Maggot!" The tall stranger shouted in my friend Hayley's face. Peering at us, scrutinizing us. You know, if I wasn't so darn scared right about now – and just shy in general – I would probably be sticking up for my friend. I mean, what gives him the right to shout at her like that? And he hasn't even met her properly yet! The nerve of some people. Anyway, he stood up straight and folded his arms, "Looks like we got a couple a' girls here, boys," He chuckled, patronising us in that simple action. To my left I heard my other friend, Elizabeth – or Lizzie, as she prefers – sigh. I didn't need to turn to tell that her head would most likely be cocked to one side.

"I guess none of you are going to make the first move, are ya?" She said to the both of us, Hayley and I. Before we had a chance to reply, another man came up beside the first. He was tall also, and was wearing a blue suit.

"Who do ve have here zen?" He laughed, and Lizzie stepped forward cocking her head to the said as I assume she did before.

"I'm Benny," She said, in a gruff voice that was very different to her own. I gave Hayley a look that said 'What the?' and received one in return. What is that girl playing at now? Honestly, Benny? I didn't know she'd had a sex change in the past five minutes.

"Wha-" I heard Hayley whisper so that only me and Lizzie could hear her, but she was cut off as Lizzie jerked her hand in my direction and said "This is Lily," In that same fake voice. "And this is Hayley" She finished, motioning her hand vaguely to where Hayley was stood.

"I see," Said the man in the suit, a slight smirk evident on his face. "I eh, think I'll leave zeese three to you, Soldier."

Soldier nodded, letting out a deep breath, "Right'ya're," he sighed, looking at each of us in turn. "Better get these three maggots down to Medic then, check overs 'n' all." At that, Hayley turned to look at me, not missing my small grunt of displeasure and somewhat awkwardness.

"Y'okay?" She muttered quietly, obviously not wanting Soldier to think that we were a "bunch of girls".

"Yeah," I replied, giving a small smile. "Better get this over with… I never did like doctors." She grinned back at me, just as Liz – or should I say Benny - spoke.

"Yo guys… we might actually want to follow the maggot man. We don't know where we're going, remember?" We both turned to see Soldier rounding the corner.

Without another thought 'Benny' and I took off, running after him, with Hayley shouting at us as we went "Hey, wait for me!"

We stood outside of a door waiting for Medic – is that what they'd called him? – to show himself. One of the walls was covered in doodles and spray-painted words and whatnot. I could feel Hayley's gaze watch as my fingers traced the same image on said wall repeatedly, whilst she was just leaning against the wall opposite. 'Benny' was lying in a chair, the most relaxed of us all, casually popping her bubble gum every now and again. I jumped slightly at hearing shouts of profanities and curses, the odd gunshot here and there. I sighed, as Hayley sidled up to where I was standing, still tracing over that same image in an odd sort of daze.

"Is that… what I think it is?" She giggled, pointing to something over my left shoulder.

"Well, it's either that or two men hugging reaaaaally close!" We chuckled at this, pointing out other things we could see.

"Look, there's the awesome face," She pointed out the yellow circle of a face that was slightly above my head.

"And here's a few weapons," I said, motioning to the right of what I was drawing over before - which, if you were wondering, was a drawing of what seemed to be a laughing bin-bag with a head setting a small moose on fire.

"And there's a-"

"YO GUYS!" We heard from behind us, both turning around at the same time.

"What is it, LIZZIE?" I said, grinning as I folded my arms.

"You forgot I was here." She demanded.

"No we didn't," I protested. "We just don't want to hang around with a booooooy!" Hayley taunted rather childishly, as we pretended to huddle away from her.

"Vell, Schatz, you are going to have to hang around with plenty of boys here!" A smiling, old-ish looking man came out of the room. Medic, judging by the doctor's coat. "You three must be the new recruits, ja?"

"Mhm," I confirmed smiling. This guy seemed much nicer than those other two blokes. Well, I thought so at least.

"Vell, girls-" Medic said, then noticing Benny adjusting her cap. "…and boy," he continued, cleaning his glasses on the sleeve of his coat, before replacing them. "Ve better get you checked over den." He held the door open, shooing us inside.

Sitting down on a spinny chair and picking up a clipboard from his desk, he looked at us three in turn. "So… names?" We were all sat on the medical bed and, being on the end, he pointed to me first.

"Lily." I said timidly.

"Lily," He replied, smiling. "Sounds like a flower…" He stared at a black and white photograph on the wall, an odd glaze over his eyes.

"Erm… sir?" I asked, clearing my throat to regain his attention.

"Oh, right…" Medic said, shaking himself out of his reverie. "Lily, let's have you first." I jumped off the bed, and stepped into a separate room that lead off from the one we were in now. The door snapped shut behind me and I warily looked around the room.

"Sit down, von't you? Don't be shy now." He said kindly, somehow sensing that I really did not like doctors. "Ve'll make this quick, ja? I'll even give you a sehr nice treat aftervards."

"O-okay" I said, taking the offered seat.

"So Lily, your full name is?" He said after scratching out my first name onto his clipboard.

"Lily Kaitlyn Mariani" I told him.

"Ah, vat an interesting name! Your middle name spelt C-A-I-T-L-I-N, ja?" He asked. I sighed, people always spelt my middle name wrong.

"No-no, it's spelt with a K and the ending is L-Y-N not L-I-N" I corrected, smiling a little all the same.

"I see, thank you. Ve can come back to most of this another time. So moving on, age and date of birth?" He continued, ready to fill out the sheet on his clipboard once more.

"2nd of January, 1984, 26 years of age." I informed "27 in a few days!"

"Any medical problems?" He asked, moving onto the next box.

"Not that I know of" I replied.

"Okay then, and vat job vere you recruited for?"

"Oh, er, I'm the new cook, I believe." I answered.

"Ah, so you vill be helping me then."

"I-I will?" I asked.

"Ja, but don't vorry, I von't bite." He chuckled, and I smiled slightly too.

"Vell, ve'll leave it there for now, any problems then tell me, ja?" I nodded my head in response, "Here you go then." And as promised he gave me a treat, which turned out to be a strawberry lollipop – yum!

I left the room with Medic to find 'Benny' standing just a little too close to Medic's confidential work computer. I rolled my eyes – Lizzie would be Lizzie, just a little bit overly nosey at times.

"Seeing as you seem very enthusiastic," Medic said, peering over his glasses at her. "You can go next." Benny gave Hayley a look, one that said something like: 'I'm done for!'

"Don't worry," I said soothingly. "It'll be over in five minutes."

"Why are you so cheery?" Hayley asked as Benny was lead into the next room. "I thought you hated the doctor?"

"Oh I do," I confirmed. "I don't hate lollipops though." I continued whilst dropping back down next to her, revealing the lollipop that Medic had given me. I ripped the plastic off, and shoved it in my mouth, letting out a satisfied 'mmm' as I took in the strawberry flavour. I Looked around the room, the only sounds being the scuffing of Hayley's shoes as she kicked her feet idly accompanied every few seconds by the soft sucking noise made as I enjoyed my lolly. A few moments later, a flustered looking Benny emerged from the other room; her hat out of place from where it had been previously. I shook my head slightly as Hayley jumped up from her seat on the bed.

"Me next then." Medic nodded, and held the door open for her to walk through.

It was quite after the door clicked shut. I looked over at Benny – I'm getting used to calling her that now – to see that she was, it seemed, hiding her face from me. So that I couldn't tell how embarrassed she was, perhaps? She was moving shiftily which caused me to cock my head to the side.

"Are you okay?" I asked concernedly.

"Erm… yes I-… I just don't like doctors." She remarked, without looking at me. I could understand where she was coming from, I didn't like doctors either, but I never knew that she didn't like them either. Besides, this one seemed nice and he acted, well as a somewhat father figure. "Not the best of company, are they? Hah!" She added with slight enthusiasm, causing me to become only more suspicious.

"Okay… You just didn't look too great-" I said with a little bit of worry but I was cut off as we heard a shout from the doctor's office. "SPY!" It roared the walls muffling the sound slightly. Benny and I looked at each other, curiosity as to what was taking place in the other room evident in both of our features. Benny quickly hopped off the bed and went to press her ear against the door. I joined her without hesitation, raising my eyebrows at the shocked look she gave me. We stood there for a few seconds before I found myself being pulled to the floor by Benny. However, despite Benny's actions, it was still rather obvious that we had been eavesdropping.

"Had a nice time, have we?" Hayley said as she stepped over us and walked towards the door.

"Yep." We said in unison.

"Well, at least two of us have…"

"Now what?" I asked, looking at them both as we just stood there.

"Ask Benny," Said Hayley, noticing that we didn't have the slightest bit of her attention.

"Whuzza?" She said, shaking her head and coming back to the present.

"Nothing," I said. "We're just wondering what to do now."

"Well," Benny said, hesitantly. "I guess it's time to go shoot some bas-"

"Look, it's those maggots again!" Shouted a man who we recognised as the soldier, cutting off whatever Benny was saying. We decided not to let this get to us this time, however – he probably spoke to most new recruits like that. As he approached we got up from where we'd been sitting on the floor, noticing that there was someone else with Soldier. The other man was a slightly shorter than Soldier and wearing a yellow builder's hat on his head, and some goggles on his face. He was spinning a wrench around his finger. I watched it cautiously, begging, in my head, that it wouldn't fly off and hit me to anyone who was listening. It did fly off a few seconds later, but that was because Benny flicked it from the man's hand. "Hey, what d'ya do that for?" He shouted, outraged.

"Kicks," Benny replied, casually.

"Well," the man replied. "If that's how you get ye' kicks, think again, or you'll end up dead." Soldier then turned and looked at Benny.

"Engy here's very protective over his tools. Don't touch, maggot."

"Fine," she replied, raising her hands as she stepped backwards slightly.

"You two are pretty quiet," The person referred to as 'Engy' said, jerking his head towards Hayley and I. "Who are you three anyway?"

"The new recruits," Hayley said, clearing her throat, as if to remove the sound of fear from her voice.

"Ah," Engy nodded. "I was wondering when we'd be seeing those. Didn't realise there were three of ye' though…"

"Didn't think two of 'em would be girls either!" Soldier said, causing himself and Engy to chuckle loudly.

"Guys, leave 'em alone," Another voice said, in what I thought to be an Australian accent. A few seconds later, a man came through one of the doors in the corridor we were standing in. He was tall, about the same height as Spy, with a hat on his head and dark sunglasses on his face. "If I didn't know betta', I'd think you were afraid of girls!" He winked at us.

"Scared of girls?" Engy echoed. "Hehe… you gotta be kidding me, I was just thinking how much… worse they are at stuff." He sounded quite hesitant, as if he was getting flustered at what this Australian man said.

"Yeah, Sniper," Soldier said. "Scared of girls? I thought that was only Scout…"

"So," the Australian man said, disregarding what Soldier had said, turning to us again. "What am I calling you three?"

"I'm Lily," I smiling. This man was far nicer than the other two.

"Lily," Sniper smiled, and nodded. "And you?"

"Hayley," She said, giving him a quick nod as if to say hello.

"And… you are?" Sniper turned to Benny, who Was once again sitting in the chair from earlier. It took a few seconds for her to realise she was supposed to answer.

"Uh… L-Benny," She said, flustered. Her voice returning somewhat back to her natural voice. Hayley and I tittered, watching her act falter . "I'm the, uh, new assassin."

"Ah," Sniper said, grinning. "You'll be with me for a bit then, to get started."

"G-great!" She mumbled, blushing. We could hear Engy and Soldier quietly laughing, watching 'Benny' get more and more feminine by the second.

"I'm the intelligence watcher," Said Hayley, trying to save Benny from slipping up any further and to draw attention off of her.

"Nice," Sniper said. "Been waitin' for that for weeks, don't think I can take much more runnin' after the little bastard Scout. He uses his running to his advantage, y'see… always takes our intelligence… anyway," he said, pulling out of his thoughts. He stopped pummelling his fist into his other hand, and turned to me, smiling. "And what might you be, now?"

"I'm the cook," I replied. "Medic told me that I would be helping him?"

"Ah yeah," Sniper said. "Medic's a mate, good person to talk to. You'll enjoy yourself, even if you don't enjoy the food!" He laughed as he watched me. Was I supposed to laugh too? "Nah, I'm just messin' with ya, you'll like it." He put a hand on my shoulder, and guided me to the door. "Y'see that buildin', that one over there?" He pointed to a building across what appeared to be a courtyard and I nodded.

"Sure do."

"Well, that's where you gotta be, right now," Sniper said. "Medic will be there, but if for some reason he ain't, just wait there. Play with a Rubik's cube or somethin', Medic has loads in the kitchen."

"Okay!" I said and opened the door, heading towards the building that he'd pointed out. I turned back briefly to see Sniper give me a thumbs up to indicate that I was headed in the right direction, and Benny and Hayley both had a hand up slightly as to say 'see you later'.

"Right," I heard Sniper say, his voice fading as I walked further away. "You're coming with me Benny."

I walked through the door on the right of the building that Sniper had shown me and sure enough, there were a few unfinished Rubik's cubes lying around amongst over things. I walked further into the room and noticed Medic leaning over a large book. I cleared my throat in order to get his attention.

"Ah, there you are, I've been vaiting for you to get here so that ve can start on lunch. The rest of the team must be hungry." He informed.

"Oh." I replied, "I'm, er, sorry to keep you waiting."

"It's no problem, lunch von't take as long as normal vith the two of us."

"And lunch is…?"

"Sandviches of course!" Medic said with a bit of enthusiasm. Well this shouldn't be too difficult then, I thought. "You can make Heavy's sandviches, he'll eat quite a lot of them so you should make about half a dozen; I've got a list of ingredients so you know how to make them. It's over there," He pointed to a nearby counter which had a scrap of paper on it.

Medic turned to the fridge and started pulling out all the things for the rest of the team's sandwiches. I thought I was being let off easily at first, only having to make one team members sandwiches, but then I saw the ingredients for Heavy's lunch:

White Bread;

Butter;

Ham;

Cheese;

Lettuce;

Tomato;

Bologna;

Olive.

I could see why I was only told to make these ones, especially if it was to be six of them!

Sighing, I went to the fridge and took out everything I needed, then to the bread box to get the slices of white bread. Back at the counter I buttered the first two slices and placed the bologna, followed by the ham, onto one of the slices. I then proceeded to put in the cheese, tomato and lettuce.

"Umm, Medic," I called over my shoulder at him. "What do I do with the olives?"

"Vell, you need to put the other slice of bread on the sandvich then cut it in half in triangles," was his reply. "Then you need to put an olive on a cocktail stick and put one in each sandvich half."

"Okay then." I said, and went to look for the cocktail sticks.

20 minutes later I had finished making all of Heavy's sandwiches and had made some for myself, Hayley and 'Benny'; so only about a dozen then.

Medic went to take Heavy's lunch to him and some of the others their lunch too so I was all alone, left to play with a Rubik's cube for 5 minutes or so; which I did.

On one of the counters were a few plates of sandwiches, some accompanied by the odd drink. They had names attached and I was told to give them out when the right team member came in, but how the heck am I supposed to know who Scout, Demoman or Pyro are? What if they're just as intimidating as that Soldier, or Engy, or Spy? I wasn't worrying about those questions for very long however, because just as I stood to get myself a glass of water I was caught completely off guard and knocked to the floor, pinned to the ground by another body.

"Ouch." I mumbled from my trapped position.

"Well this is a real frickin' embarrassment!" Said the stranger I was knocked over by, standing up and offering a hand to me. I took it hesitantly and allowed him to pull me to my feet. I brushed myself off as he said "Sorry for knockin' ya over like that; didn't see ya there. I, er, came for my lunch. Scout's the name by the way."

"Oh, n-no, it's okay." I replied, handing over the plate labelled 'Scout' and the drink that was beside it – 'Bonk!' I think it was called, what an odd name for a drink.

"So, ah, what's ya name kid." He asked, making light conversation. 'Kid?' I thought. He looked around the same age as me, if not younger.

"Lily," I replied, "I'm the new cook. I'll be helping Medic too."

"So did you make these sandwiches then?" He asked.

"No, um, Medic made those ones; I made Heavy's, Hayley's and L-Benny's. Of course, you won't know Hayley or Benny though." I rambled.

"Hayley, eh? Rings a bell, might-a ran into her earlier on my way here." He muttered taking another bite of sandwich, "Mmm, this is good. You, er, you can have one if ya like."

"Okay then." I said, growing used to this guy's company already. I reached for a sandwich off of the plate just as he reached for another too. Our hands brushed together and his stayed on mine for a few seconds before he took it away, a slight blush tingeing his cheeks. He had reasonably soft hands and his skin was quite warm. My own skin was tingling slightly from where his had made contact and I felt a bit of a blush of my own forming but I looked down quickly.

"I, er, have to go, enemy intelligence to capture, ya' know? Well, it, um, it was nice meetin' ya, Lily. I'll see ya again sometime?" He stumbled over his words a few times but had a small smile lighting up his features.

"Sure," I confirmed. "See you again sometime." And with that he drank the rest of his 'Bonk!' and ran from the room.

Just as he'd left, Medic came back in through the other door, finished being delivery boy.

"How's it going in here?" He asked.

"I think I am seriously going to like this place." I replied, my face breaking into a huge grin.