Yes, no. Maybe…I don't know. Can you repeat that question? You're not the boss of me now. You're not the boss of me now. You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big. You're not the boss of me now. You're not the boss on me now. You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big…. Life is unfair…

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a partridge in a pear tree.

Malcolm to camera: Me and Stevie have this project due in a week so we're gonna be working on it all weekend. We're not telling anyone what it is yet because we don't want Reese to over hear. We're gonna be testing it on him and Francis. Him and Piama are coming to visit for Christmas tomorrow.

"Seriously, Malcolm," Reese said, "You have to stop talking to yourself."

"You didn't hear what I said, did you?" Malcolm asked.

"Why would I pay attention to you?" he laughed. "I got better things to do."

"Like what? Stare at the ceiling?"

"I'm looking for pictures in the texture!" he argued. "See look! A raccoon giving birth!"

"That's not…a raccoon…" Stevie struggled to say, "giving birth…. That's a skunk…eating…a grasshopper…"

"Stevie!" Malcolm snapped. "Focus! Now, I'm gonna come over to your house on Sunday so I can get the stuff. Then we'll test it on Monday."

"I know that…already," Stevie said, annoyed. "We've been…through it…many times."

The door opened and Dewey came in. He threw his backpack on his bed and said, "I'm back from Noah's house." He smiled. "It was so fun. We're both really excited for Christmas. I'm gonna stay up all night on Christmas Eve so I can meet Santa!"

"Santa?" Malcolm asked.

"You still believe in that crap?" Reese laughed.

"What do you mean by 'Do I believe in it?'" Dewey wondered.

"Dewey, Santa Clause isn't real," Malcolm said.

"He is to. Why would you even say that? That's like saying dad's not real."

"Why?" Reese asked.

"Because all people on Earth exist."

"Okay, fine," Malcolm said. "Santa exists."

"Really?" Stevie wondered.

"No," Malcolm whispered.

"I heard that!" Dewey said angrily. "If you don't believe in Santa, I don't care!" He jumped on his bed and looked at the ceiling. "Hey look! Mom's face is in the ceiling!"

"Really?" Reese asked. "I thought it looked more like the face of a pig."|