Chapter 1: Fear

So many things have happened since I overheard that one conversation that changed my life forever. Before the thing I worried about most was that Ren would know that I had fallen in love with him after I had vowed to never love again. In comparison this seems much worse because of how many people would be hurt if this secret was discovered. I've already been hurt physically by it because I chose to protect my niece from a man with a grudge against my father, her grandfather. The man isn't in his right mind, and he has tortured me making the marks only noticeable in area's that won't show when I act.

Today I had to meet with the man after my shoot, and the only thing that kept me from screaming in fear was that I had to protect her. She is just a child, and the marks from the whip that I have on my back would have killed her. Every time after I see him I go to a doctor disguised with realistic long hair that scrapes across the floor that I got from Ten-san. I used the name Misao, but I know the doctor realizes it's a disguise, and I know he has figured out I'm an actress. Thanks to him though the marks don't scar, and heal quickly. As long as they aren't fresh I could just say that they were scars from my childhood. Luckily he has not tried to claim me as a woman I don't think I'd be able to handle it if he did.

I have already turned eighteen, and I have been in many dramas. The one I'm in now I'm co-starring with Ren as his childhood friend, so far the script hasn't had any romance between the two of us. Right now Ren's character Kalen is dating his brother Kaito's best friend Reina, and my character to hide who she really likes has been flirting with Kaito. It has been hinted at though in the drama that Kalen and Ayano (my character) are in love, but don't want to ruin their friendship by pursuing it thinking that other could never feel that way about them. We've been filming it for about four months, and it's my first non-bully role. I am also in another drama as a teenage girl whose parents died, and is now running the family Ryokan.

"Kyoko it's time to go to the next scene," Director Ogata called, it's actually because of Director Ogata that I got this role.

"Alright director," I said smiling back as I became Ayano.

"You know Aya I've been lying to you," Reina said as she looked at me her eyes filled with tears.

I had to respond without a script, so I had no clue how the scene would go. Reina only had basic lines in order to make the drama flow the way he wanted. Sort of like how Ren did in Dark Moon once he had Katsuki perfected.

"Come on it can't be that bad Rei," I responded looking her in the eye.

"Yes it is. I've probably ruined our friendship because I stupidly listened to Kaito's advice," she said crying as she put her face into her hands.

"What did you do this time Rei?" I asked knowing when she and Kaito got together and plotted anything can happen.

"I know I told you I was dating Kalen, and we were just keeping it on the down low, but we aren't dating," she said shocking me as I stared at her my face showing my shock and anger.

"Why the hell would you make me think you were dating Kalen? Does he even know that you had told me you two were dating?" I asked my voice filled with anger.

"It's because Kaito thought you would get jealous if Kalen was dating someone, but the stupid idiot doesn't want to hurt you. Kalen is in love with you!" she said and I laughed my voice filled with pain.

"Kalen isn't in love with me. We are just childhood friends even if we did kiss when he got drunk," I said accidentally letting some Kyoko out.

"Wait you two kissed?" she asked looking shocked, looking around the set discreetly I noticed that most people thought I was still completely in character.

"Yes we kissed. I doubt he even knew it was me though, he was so drunk he probably would have even kissed a guy," I said letting the pain seep into my voice it was harder to keep a grasp on Ayano right now.

"He wouldn't do that Aya for goodness sakes Kalen has been in love with you since we were eight!" she said making my face go pale.

"You're lying," I said tears flowing down my face as I spun and ran away knowing that was what Ayano would do.

We were filming in the park, and I'd been told talking with Reina wouldn't be the whole scene, so I just ran blindly through the park. Which wasn't really smart considering I bumped into someone, and through my tears I could see Ren, as Kalen looking down at me concerned. I turned to run from him, but his arms wrapped around me trapping me there.

"Aya what's wrong?" he asked brushing a strand of hair out of my face as he looked down at me gently.

"Reina lied to me about something," I answered vaguely, recognizing his Katsuki look.

"I guess that would make you upset, you two tell each other everything," he said with a smile.

"She told me you two were dating," I blurted out before covering my mouth blushing red.

"Why would she tell you we were dating? Reina is going out with Kaito," he said shocking me even more and I probably resembled a fish at the moment.

"She's dating Kaito?" I asked and his eyes darkened.

"Maybe she lied because she knows you are in love with Kaito, and didn't want to hurt you," he said darkly as he turned to leave.

"She wouldn't do that Reina's always known that I've never loved Kaito, he was just a shield," I said without thinking again not wanting Kalen to keep looking so angry and depressed.

"Then why would she lie to you about dating me?" he asked his voice raising as he pinned my arms to my side as he looked down at me.

"She and Kaito thought I'd get jealous if you two were dating, and then she told me today that you two had never dated. She must have realized I'd never get jealous," I said lying to him while looking at him defiantly.

"If you'd never get jealous, why are you so angry she lied then?" he asked his eyes darkening more as his grip on my tightened.

"That's ... that's because she's my best friend we aren't suppose to lie to each other," I said stumbling a little.

"You don't sound so sure about that Aya," he said chuckling darkly as he pulled me against his body making me remember this drama wasn't just going to be a single kiss like a Fairy Tale romance would have. This drama's audience was older teens or young adults meaning some scenes could get a little heated.

"I ... I ... of course I'm sure," I choked out turning bright red, and trying to hide it by burying my head into his chest.

"Then look me in the eye, and tell me without stuttering that you weren't angry because she succeeded in making you jealous," he said daringly his voice filled with amusement and something I couldn't pin point.

"I wasn't jealous," I mumbled looking into his dark eyes filled with so many emotions.

"I think you were," he said.

Then before I knew what was happening he pulled me up tight against him, tilted my head, and kissed me. To everyone else even him I had never truly kissed Ren before, and Ayano's character left me as I remembered the night that he had been drunk. My arms wrapped around his neck, as I pulled myself tight against Ren and kissed him back with abandon. His lips tasted like chocolate which is weird considering Ren hate's sweets, but I could feel myself melting. All too soon he pulled away.

My eyes alight with the love I felt for him I struggled to make myself seem like I was still in Ayano's character as I blushed. Stumbling I pushed myself away from him, and looked at him letting the love fade my eyes as disbelief replaced it. I was glad that his eyes had been closed well I regained the emotion I should be feeling, and when his eyes opened the love I saw their made me choke on the words I wanted to say.

"Why the hell did you do that?" I asked angrily knowing that Ayano would think their friendship wouldn't last if they became a couple.

"Because maybe I want you to be jealous if I was dating someone else, Aya! Maybe I want to be introduced as more than your childhood friend, or your best friend!" he shouted as he looked down at me.

"I think you're confused Kalen. You can't want me to be jealous. It's ridiculous," I said with a laugh.

"Why is my love for you ridiculous!?" he shouted angrily.

"Kalen you are my best friend, and I think you've been around Kaito too much. You've never loved anyone before, so you are probably mistaking your protectiveness for me for love. I'll see you tomorrow Kalen," I said walking away from him my eyes filling with tears as I forced myself not to look back.

"Alright cut, good work guys we got what I wanted in one take," Director Ogata said with a bright smile.

I turned around to look at the set, and found Ren kneeling on the ground probably what Kalen had done when Ayano walked away. Ren seemed to still be in character because he was shaking as if he had really been rejected by the girl he loved. Now that I think about it he had told Bo basically two years ago that he was in love with a high school girl, but no one has ever heard of a love life involving Ren.

"Ren the takes over are you alright?" I asked looking down at him, and trying to not think about how much I wanted to kiss him again.

"Yeah I'm fine. Just a little trouble breaking away from Kalen's emotions is all, I wonder if it would hurt that much, or more to be rejected in real life," he said and then went pale. "I'm so sorry Kyoko I didn't mean to refer to you."

"Ren it's fine. I rarely even think of Shoutaro these days," I replied truthfully and I could see he was shocked that I could say the name without anger.

"Does that mean you no longer want revenge?" he asked standing up, and looking down at me with a gentle smile.

"I haven't for a long time, there are more important things in my life right now then revenge," I said my eyes going dark as I thought of how I had to protect her from that monster.

"Kyoko are you alright?" he asked making me realize he had noticed the darkness I felt.

"Yeah I just have a lot on my mind right now Ren," I said, but as my phone rang I could feel the fear creeping up on me, "if you'll excuse me I have to take this."

I walked off the set feeling his eyes bore into me as I answered the phone my hand shaking. I knew without even looking at the name that it was him calling, and I was trying not to let my fear show on my face. Anyone who could see my face would end up worrying, and that could be dangerous.

"I thought you'd be here by now," he said his voice filled with anger that made my spine tingle.

"The shoot is taking longer than I thought it would," I said my words slightly shaking.

"You better get here soon, or I'll just go find your precious niece to entertain me, and my whip," he said laughing darkly.

"No don't I'll be there in twenty minutes at the most," I said my voice full of my fear and anguish.

"You better be," he said laughing crazily.

"Kyoko-chan is everything alright?" Director Ogata said.

After I learned the secret, I had asked for all of my jobs to only call me Kyoko and for my last name to remain a secret. I had told President Takarada that it was because with people looking me up more, and more if they knew my last name they could link me with Shou. He realized of course that it could be negative or positive and agreed to keep my name a secret.

"I'm sorry director I have to leave, I had forgotten I had a rescheduling with another job today, and I'm late," I said bowing down hating that I had to lie to him.

"It's fine Kyoko, I should have made sure to double check you had nothing else tonight when I decided to go a little longer," he said bowing down to me in return.

"No it's my fault by director."

With that I ran off knowing that my behaviour had been a little strange considering I never left a job without saying bye to everyone. My fear was building as I ran to the building I had to meet him at, afraid that he would take her anyway. I never had a taxi or car bring me here knowing that they'd find the place weird, and might stay around to make sure I was fine. If he had any reason to believe I had told anyone what he was doing, I know he would kill her.

"I'm sorry I'm late," I gasped as I ran into the warehouse and immediately felt the whip go across my bare stomach my top having ridden up when I ran here.

"You're lucky I decided to call," he said darkly as he handcuffed me to a post and whipped my back.

He never forced me to undress, and I had a feeling it was because he loved watching my clothes become tattered and bloodied as he whipped me. He never got turned on by this, but he found it highly entertaining as he thought of my father when he whipped me. When I asked him once what my father had done to him, I was forced to cancel my jobs for a week, and the doctor didn't let me out for that long. After the first time he stopped asking for me to pay, I wouldn't tell him who I was, and because he couldn't be sure I had the money I'd need he used his own money to pay for my treatments. In turn I secretly donated money every month to the hospitals abuse program.

I screamed against the gag as he broke open the skin on my back. The whip coming down again, and again. For an hour he whipped my back, breasts, and thighs, making sure they couldn't be seen no matter what type of costume I was wearing. He knew that if anyone had any idea of what was happening they'd secretly follow me, and he'd get caught. Because of that he made sure my costumes never revealed it knowing I wouldn't say anything in order to protect her.

"We're done for today, leave," he said as he licked at the blood on his whip smiling like the maniac he is.

I went out the side door that was blocked from view because of the dumpster in front of it. Changing quickly into the clothes I wore as Misao, and making sure I was walking confidently I made my way to the doctors. Walking there was difficult, and I was on the verge of passing out as I entered the small clinic. The nurse immediately took me to a room, after the third time I was here doctor Alain told them to take me to a room immediately, and unless if he was doing surgery to have someone else examine his patients for him. The nurses never thought I was his lover because I could see the pitying looks they gave me, but I also knew they had no clue why I was here so often, all they knew is that Alain would become pale and look horrified after I was here.

"Misao why won't you let me call the police?" he begged me as he walked in taking in my pale face immediately as he looked at me.

"I can't if he thinks the police know what's going on he'll kill someone very important to me," I told him gasping as he took my shirt off to look at my injuries.

"Misao you'll end up dead because of this. How can no one notice what is going on between you and your husband?" he asked looking at me angrily.

"Why do you think I'm married?" I asked panicking thinking he had found out who I really was.

"Because you're the type of girl who'd only have a child with the man she loves, and if she's married," he said shocking me as I stared at him.

"What do you mean child!?" I asked him scared at the prospect of being a mother.

"You're three months pregnant Misao, you left last time before I could tell you. Why would you stay with a man who hurts you like this? Do you want him to do this to your child after it's born, or kill it before it has the chance to live?" he asked me angrily as he applied medicine to the marks over my body.

"Wait you think the baby's father is the one doing this don't you? I asked as realization for his anger dawned on me.

"You mean it isn't?" he asked his voice tinged slightly with relief.

"No he's someone who'd rather die than hurt another human being. The man who did this has a grudge against my father, and because my father never knew I was born the man was going after my young niece. I had gone to pick her up from school since we became friends a long time ago, and he had been watching her creepily. The man didn't even hide the fact that he was going after her because of who her grandfather was, so I told him who I was, and showed him proof of it. I promised that any time he was to angry at what my father had done I'd let him do what he wanted to me without the police being involved, as long as he left my family alone," I told him knowing without details he'd still believe that it was the baby's father who had done this.

"Isn't there anything you can do to stop him?" he begged me.

"No, all I can do is protect her she's just a little girl she would end up dead if he took her," I said crying as I thought of her beautiful face covered in bruises as she was put into a coffin.

"Here's my home address Misao, if you ever need me when the clinic isn't open come there alright. I have a feeling you won't get treated otherwise," he told me tears flowing down his face.

"I will, but please keep my condition a secret Alain. No matter what happens though remember that I wouldn't accept any more help than this," I told him fearing that the moment that man knew I was expecting he'd kill me, and my unborn child.

"Misao be careful alright," he told me as I left the clinic.

The nurses eyes were on my, and I knew they could feel the tension from Alain. As I walked out the door of the clinic I found myself once again bumping into someone that day. I looked up to apologize, and felt my breathe freeze as I stared into the eyes of President Takarada. For a moment I had no clue what to say, and realized that if I didn't say anything it would be weird.

"I am so sorry sir are you alright?" I asked speaking in a heavily accented Japanese making it sound broken like I was struggling to speak.

"I'm fine miss are you?" he asked as he made sure I was steady on my feet probably noticing my wince when he touched my back.

"I fine. I had appointment to see doctor about my anemia," I said brokenly again making it sound like I was unsteady on my feet because I was anemic.

"Well maybe you can help me?" he asked switching to English.

"Of course," I replied with a Canadian accent.

"A young charge of my company has been donating money to this clinic, and I was hoping to do the same. Do you know if the doctor in charge is here?" he asked me.

"Yes Alain is in. He'd welcome any donation," I said happily.

"Thank you miss, and I hope you have a good day," he said leaving.

I sighed in relief as he went, and was glad that not even a hint of recognition had gone through his eyes. The president had probably heard from Sawara-san that I was donating money to a few clinics in the area, and wanted to join in. He always loved charities, and I was certain that neither he nor Alain could connect Misao with Kyoko.

I do not own Skip Beat, but it is one of my favorite animes/mangas