I OWN NOTHING! Stephanie Meyer does!
Also… I really love this plot, but if I don't get at least 5 reviews, I will quit this story.
Review would be lovely! Read on!
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God, why de he leave me?
I know I'm not special, not pretty, not smart enough to stand up to his qualifications, but Jesus, it hurts so bad.
Nothing could distract me from the constant pain ripping me up inside like open flames in a scalding fire.
"I don't want you," he spoke; and those words- those four fucking words- are to be embedded in my memory- forever.
Jake, cliff-diving, motorcycles, all too childish for what I was about to do next.
Commit my suicide, of course, if you were wondering. My tourniquet left me, my god, my lover, my best friend- was gone- it was just a stupid game.
The stupid game that caused me to endure so much pain, Charlie to endure pain, hell- even Angela to be in pain. The sight of my lifeless brown eyes was too much for her to bare.
My shaking hands reached out for a piece of blank white paper and a pen, and I wrote one last poem before writing my death letters.
Blood drips slowly
Man creeps lowly, outside of your door.
Knife upraised, life is lost
Your body on the floor
Blood is red on your bed
The cruel man watches with no bore
Your eyes close, breathing stops…your heart beats no more.
( AN: Sorry everyone. This is one of my poems I wrote when one of my friends was in hard times. Her pain was my pain. Onward.)
Tears fell gradually as I wrote my poem. To an outsider, this would look…depressing and odd and most of all; too dramatic. But to me, he- that cruel man- was my killer. He took my heart and played with it, knowing it could be replaced any time he wanted. My blood soon would be on the sheets, however, if everything went right.
Edward's POV
"That's it!" I screamed, "I'm done! I can't take it anymore!"
The gray walls of the basement I was in shuddered through the establishment, making any one upstairs in the restaurant, shut up with a start.
I didn't really care. I just needed Bella back.
What really caused me to leave her? Protection was the main point but what about beauty and insecurity? No matter what, I was never going to be compared to Bella, she was better than me. Better than the devil that tainted each wisp of air when he didn't need it.
"Beauty," I muttered, "Many people love and envy. But it is for the light of Bella's soul her beams- her golden beams will light up this jealous world." ( Sorry again! My poetry once again…"
My feet wandered their way out of an emergency exit and I set off running. The thrill of the run was nothing compared to flying air born in an airplane; besides, what does a demon need to be doing first class on a machine? Nothing, I tell you. Absolutely nothing.
"Insufferable fool!" I shouted at myself. My eyes watered with venom tears that would never fall.
"Bella, please, my love. Wait for me. I need you. Please- oh please- forgive me. I'd give you anything in the world," I cried while running my hand through my tangled, greasy hair.
My thoughts were interrupted by my phone ringing. Alice.
I, stupidly, answered it.
"What?" I asked miffed for taking me out of my minds conflictions.
"YES! Finally, Edward, you see the light of Lisbon! It took you damn long enough!" her voice froze for a a few seconds until I heard her labored breathing, "Bella, God no! Edward! Hurry up! Don't be…too late! Bella," she sniffled," She's gonna commit suicide! Hurry! Run faster!" the phone clicked off.
My eyes widened and I ran faster than ever before, faster than twelve newborns combined. I was speed lighting.
Something cold and stingy whispered across me cheek. My hand reached up to inspect further.
I was crying.
Bella's POV
I had everything.
The knife and the pills. I just needed to write the letters.
One to Alice.
Alice,
You were my best friend. You probably are the only best friend to me. Please, if you see this in your vision, don't try and stop me. I've waited far too long for this and I wont give this up.
But this isn't the point. The point is that, even though you don't love me, I will always love you.
Even in death, my love for you will continue on.
Be safe xxx
-Bella
I kissed my letter shut, showing how much I loved her. Surely, she would be able to detect my kiss on the lined paper.
One to Charlie and Renee.
Dad and Mom,
Mom, I remember you once telling me, "Wherever you are happy is where you belong," and I'm not happy here.
Hopefully, I got up with the spirits in the sky, if not the confines of hell would be better than this torture here on Earth. Just remember mom, I'll always love you.
And dad…I'm sorry I couldn't be the daughter you wanted me to be. Having to watch your own flesh and bones walk around like a zombie and be lifeless- no father should ever go through that, yet here I am, proving I can be selfish. So, I'm going to e selfish one more time and end my sorrow to be happier.
Please know this is going to be the only way I can fine peace and I will see you both in the afterlife.
All my love, your daughter,
Isabella Marie Swan xxx.
My tears were hard and wet on that letter, and next, on the letter soon to come, I knew it would be the hardest of them all.
Edward,
I'm sorry. For everything I've done to you and your family. I guess I wasn't smart enough to know that all you wanted was a game. To play around with for a few months, through out, and find a new one in the next day or two.
I never knew you were that kind of person, yet I didn't know I was going to be the toy.
Even though your vicious character has me mesmerized, I will never stop loving you.
The first kiss, the first dance, the fake love are memories I will always cherish and hopefully bring with me into…wherever I'm going after my death.
I will always love you and hopefully, you will never forgot me and remember to put some flowers on my grave every now and then. It would be highly appreciated, yet I am asking for too much.
Goodbye and good rid dens,
Bella. Xox.
Tears were pouring hot and fast down my cheeks. I bit my lip so hard it drew blood and I immediately tasted the salty taste on my tongue and for once in my life, I savored the feeling.
Creepy? Immensely so.
Finally, my time of release.
I grabbed the pills and looked at the bottle for a moment. I opened the lid and swallowed all of the small blut little pills dry. Everything, now was becoming lighter and cloudy.
I grabbed the knife quickly, knowing I only had 20 minutes before my eyes closed forever.
I dragged the ragged metal across my ivory skin hard and deep. The pain being emitted slowly transformed into pleasure and I repeated the action several times, on both arms, before the bloods scent sent me into dizziness.
I lay there for ten minutes, staring blankly at the white wall and staring blankly at it. I heard a crash from my window and the sound entered my muffled ears. My head was too lazy to form upwards.
"BELLA!" I heard a velvet scream.
I smiled slightly at the illusion.
"Bella, please, you c-c-an't give up," my angel was sobbing. Angels shouldn't cry. "I need you too much. It was all a lie. Bella don't leave me," He whispered brokenly, " Please don't leave me."
I whispered words with the strength I amazingly beheld.
"Find someone new," I said almost inaudibly.
"I cant! Bella, you're my only love! Don't give up, love. Don't. Stay." he bellowed.
I could fell him biting me and the cold venom surging through my empty veins but I was too far gone for anyone to know.
I remembered there was something he needed to know.
"E-E-Edward-d-d- m-my letter," I spoke as the life was being dragged out of me.
"What letter?! Bella, fight for me, keep fighting dammit!" he screamed desperately.
"My suicide letters…" And then, then I was gone.
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Did anyone like it? Sorry about the poetry, I just thought it would fir well into it.
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Monkeys-love-nanners.