Hello my beautiful fanfictioners. This is my first fic so don't murder me with reviews please. I appreciate all constructive criticism as long as it isn't commenting on the length. Because I know that it isn't as long as more experienced peeps, but hey! writing them that lengthy is not easy. I got the inspiration for this little fic from the song "See You Again" by Carrie Underwood. It's an amazing song that makes me cry, and feel hopeful and just... is amazing. I found out that she actually submitted it along with "There's a Place for Us" for VoTD, and while I love the one they chose, I can't help but love this one all the more. Song lyrics are in bold. I do not own the Chronicles of Narnia or "See You Again."
You will never return to Narnia. Never. Lucy's eyes well up with tears at the thought. This journey, through beauty and terror, and this glimpse into the world she so loves, this world she has always called home even in England, was worth the pain. Now the only thing left for her to do was leave it. Saying goodbye to all her friends, forever, that is what threatens to break her heart. Saying goodbye to Aslan, despite his assurance that he is in her original world as much as he is here, that all she needs to do is to find him under a new name.
Caspian. A new tug on her heart, sharper than the last. She closes her eyes thinking of all their moments. Her crush formed when she first saw him, a tall, dark, handsome hero. Unattainable with a cruel age difference and her beautiful sister there, easily able to make claims on his heart being his age. That crush was nothing to how her feelings have since grown on the Dawn Treader. Her thoughts of him never faded in the other world-she refused to call it hers- and to turn in the cold waters to find him there, holding her so close to his perfection. Every moment she was near him turned a childish crush on a heroic figure into full-blown love. How can she stand to leave him, especially when she swears that she sees the stirrings of an all to familiar emotion in his warm eyes as he looks at her? For a moment, she doesn't think she can stand to leave, despite what Aslan tells her.
She looks around her and sighs, the beauty of Narnia making memories of England seem faded as if she jumped from a cloudy haze of black and white into full blown Technicolor. This world is her fate, her one true love. It has always been her home, and it always will be. A tear trails down her cheek as she looks around once more, wondering again how she can bear to leave.
Dearest one. An all too familiar voice sounds in her head. I know of your longing. I wish I could give in to you for a future here would be happy and bright. Yet this is not how your story is meant to end. Dear one, you must return, for reasons I can never give you. A brief moment of anger rips through her. Aslan always said he could tell no other person's story, but this is her own.
The future is not for me to tell, but for you to experience. Dearest, know that you shall see Narnia again, never doubt it. A surge of hope and doubt war through her, conflicting words barreling through and lodging themselves in her chest. Not to the Narnia you know, but to the True Narnia. That of my father's land. Now it is time to return to England, the other place which must be called yours.
Tears fall over the tracks of the ones before them, but she does not doubt his word. It is time to return to the place of her birth. She cannot hope for an early entrance to Aslan's country, but she can look forward to the time. She looks into the eyes of the man she loves and then into the gentle eyes of her Lion. A slow nod and a soft goodbye were her last actions in Narnia.
Said goodbye, turned around and you were gone, gone, gone
Faded into the setting sun, slipped away.
The shock of being back to the small room, a beautiful picture before her eyes, knocks her off her feet. Edmund has sorrow written all over his face, and Eustace seems conflicted, sad to have left but hopeful with the almost promise to come again. A wave of pure despair rocks through Lucy's body as she stares at the picture before. It is Dawn Treader to a T, but it looks slightly different from before she left. In the distance, barely distinguishable from the stormy sky, is a faded but ever present shape of the Lion. She can make out no distinguishable face but feels comforted. She will one day see him in his Father's land. She can almost hear his roar, and still sees the slight motion of the waves. Her tears dry instantly.
But I won't cry 'cause I know I'll never be lonely
For You are the stars to me, You are the light I follow
Lucy remembers every moment of Narnia. Every battle she fought alongside of Peter and Edmund, refusing to be left behind when her love, her world, was threatened. Every drop of her beloved cordial, wiping away every trace of injury in her many beloveds. She remembers meeting Mr. Tumnus, meeting Aslan, discovering Edmund's kindness. Meeting Caspian. But she will see them all again one day.
I will see you again, This is not where it ends.
I will carry you with me 'till I see you again
That night and every night afterwards, Lucy remembers. She listens to storms, winds, and noises of her homeland, stockpiling every memory as a story for the future. She remembers Aslan's promise. With this promise of a forever in True Narnia, she cannot fear death. She refuses to fear life because she cannot let Aslan down by moping. Her days are filled with England, but her nights of futures in Narnia.
I can hear those echoes in the wind at night
Calling me back in time, back to you
She can never quite imagine True Narnia. She suspects it is much like the land she loves, only forever peaceful. Somehow it must be more beautiful, though she cannot fathom how. Before her nights of Narnia end, she often goes to a secret nook to look out on the horizon deep in the harsh oceans of England. Sometimes, as the sun fills the sky with a golden beauty, she thinks she can almost see the mane of a beautiful Lion, reminding her of what awaits when she finishes the adventure of life. There is the place where she will join Caspian, the version of Caspian she knows, one which will love her. She grins at the thought.
In a place far away, where the water meets the sky
The thought of it makes me smile
You were my tomorrow
She forces herself to remember even insignificant moments, even the bad ones. Her jealousy of Susan's beauty and her suitors, her annoyance at Peter and Edmund's protectiveness. She often muffles laughs at the idea of the Valiant Queen needing protection from a scared boy awed by her stories, as her own suitors often were frightened by a single glare by Edmund, yet they kept returning for her stories of happenings both real and imagined. She could never- and still cannot-doubt her brother's love.
I will see you again, this is not where it ends
I will carry you with me 'till I see you again
Homesickness often racks her heart. She tries to change England as she once could Narnia, but even as she ages into a young woman, her words mean nothing. She misses those times at which she could say one word and have a kingdom heed it. She is not angry at her lack of power, rather she simply longs for a world which all her ideas for the good of the people could be used. She often dreams of Caspian and wonders if he took a wife, had a child. If by now, with the time difference, he is long dead.
Sometimes I feel my heart is breaking
But I stay strong and I hold on because I know
I will see you again, this is not where it ends
I will carry you with me
She does not cry at the thought. If he passed on, he would be in True Narnia. She hopes he waits for her, for she loves him still. No boy ever brings on this level of affection. She would not blame him if he loved another for she is sure, deep in her heart that he, in those moments on Dawn Treader, returned her love. This feeling, that corner of his heart, shall forever be hers and Aslan's country will reinforce this. Joy is in her being at this knowledge, and she does not envy Peter, nor Edmund, nor even Susan as they each find loves to cherish in England, for she cherishes her own. Her own love in her most secret heart. She only ever cries from the strength of her joy in living now.
I will see you again, this is not where it ends
I will carry you with me 'till I see you again
Lucy forever remembers her bittersweet goodbye to the only home she has ever known. The beauty of Narnia truly made its final impression on her as she realized she would never again see this moment. Her hope to see its original, rather than the Narnia she knew as the replicate it was, overpowers any feeling of sadness. She refuses to forget, so she will forever have a place to compare her other sadnesses in life.
Said goodbye, turned around, and you were gone, gone, gone.
And when the time in her homeland ends, despite the situation which was deemed tragic in all involved, Lucy feels true happiness surge back to her. Narnia will forever be with her. She has returned to her true home, the home of her heart and birthplace of her soul. And it is everything she imagined-plus so very much more.