Me: Well I'm back for another great fic.
Kyo: Shut up already! No one cares but you.
Soujiro: That's not nice Kyo, sure he's a horrible writer
Me: Hey!
Soujiro: And he…
Me: Just say the legal thing.
Kyo: Dumb ass here doesn't own Evangelion nor will he ever.
The Holy Church of Asuka x Shinji
"Hey I have a surprise for my two favorite Eva Characters" I said to a confused Asuka and Shinji.
"You know you're breaking the fourth wall by talking directly to us." Asuka scolded.
"Shut up, I'm the writer here and can do what ever I want." I replied to the ungrateful redhead.
Asuka just sighed "Fine then what did you want to show us?"
"This" and before the two pilots was a massive church. "This is the Church dedicated to the love you two share with each other."
"WHAT!!!!" They both screamed in unison.
"Well I like to stay but I think I'll just put the fourth wall back up and leave you guys to do what you want."
"HELL NO YOU CAN'T BREAK THE FOURTH WALL, MAKE A CHURCH ABOUT ME BEING IN LOVE WITH BAKA OVER HERE AND JUST PUT THE WALL BACK UP."
"Yes I can, I have duct tape I can do anything. If you have anymore questions take them up with Cardinal Katsuragi." And I leave.
"Wait Cardinal Katsuragi, you mean Misato?" Shinji so got his answer when the cardinal of the Shinji x Asuka church/ their roommate came out. Misato's outfit was a short red skirt with slits up both legs. She was also wearing a low cut red silk top with a designer silk red coat and a jewel incrusted red hat.
"Yay you two came" As the 'cardinal' grabbed both kids into a strong hug. "I'm so happy you two are finally realizing the love you have for each other"
"Ummm Misato what's going on?"
"Well Shinji we decided to create a church for you two lovebirds because you two are the author's favorite couple. Let me show you inside."
The 'cardinal' lead them through the doors and into a massive chapel that several stain glass windows showing images of the couple. Some of the images were just sweet things like the two of them holding hands, while others could be considered boarder line hentai and everything in between. There were already several people in the chapel, mainly men who came to see the 'cardinal' in her outfit which probably why Maya was there.
"IS EVERYONE HERE INSAINE?" Asuka yelled.
"Wack wack wack"
"What's PenPen doing here?" Asked Shinji
"You mean Archbishop PenPen" Misato corrected.
"He's an Archbishop!" Shinji looked shocked
"Wack wack wack wack"
"I don't want to donate money."
"Wack wack wack"
"Fine" Shinji started to pull money out of his pocket and 'donated' to the church.
"I still don't like the fact that people think that I'm in love with baka here."
"Shhh Asuka reverend Akagi coming to do a sermon."
Ritsuko came out wearing a pair of very tight black pants and a black silk shirt that had several of the top buttons missing to show of Ritsuko's 'assets'
"Oops I dropped something" As Ritsuko bended over to pick up some papers Maya got real red and nearly fainted and some guys could be hear "Danm baby got back."
Ritsuko began "The read for today is from Asuka's diary December 19th. 'I caught some stupid bimbo trying to hit on my Shinji-kun. Who does she think she is. I'm 100 times better looking and not nearly as easy. If anyone is going to do anything with Shinji its going to be me. Only the Great Auska Langley Soryu should have a boyfriend as sweet, kind, and hot as Shinji-kun.'"
Asuka's face went beat red
Ritsuko continued " The next reading is from the journal of Shinji Ikari January 2nd. 'I think I finally figured out why Asuka's so mean all the time. She's just scared that other people will hurt her so she lashes out first. I know deep inside Asuka is a wonderful person. And I won't be driven away because I will never hurt her. Man Asuka looked fine today. I'd hit that like it owes me money."'
Now Shinji's face was red.
"Reverend Akagi can I join the church?" Asked a blushing Maya.
"Sure come with me to my office and I can 'baptize' you" Ritsuko said with a wink. And soon the two ladies walk hand and hand to the back offices.
"Look at her baptizing only one person, I can baptize ten guys at once, that's why I'm the Cardinal and you're just a reverend.
"Ten guys at once, I knew those collage stories about you were true." Said a still red faced Asuka
Then Rei and Kaworu approached Asuka and Shinji. "As two of the main rivals for Shinji's love we just like to say we support both of you and are happy you found each other."
"Umm thanks Kaworu" Said Shinji.
"Good luck with Ikari pilot Soryu I'm going over in the back pew with Kaworu and making out with him. Goodbye." And so they went to the back pew and started to make out.
"Wow that was random." Said the 'Cardinal'.
"JUST END THE STORY ALREADY WILL YOU!!" screamed the still blushing red head.
"Fine I'll end the story if you two will admit you love each other and kiss." Said the author.
"Right Asuka I love you"
"Fine Shinji I love you" The two teen started to kiss and after three seconds they pulled apart and looked deep in each others eyes and then started to make out passionately.
The End
Me: All's well that ends well.
Misato: Weren't you putting the fourth wall back up with duct tape?
Me: Yea, well I didn't have any duct tape so I decided to eat bread pudding instead.
Misato: Can I have some?
Me: Sure (Hands Misato some bread pudding) You want some too Archbishop?
PenPen: Wack Wack.
Me: Cool slap me some fin bro. (Me and hi five) Now readers review or else you won't get any bread pudding.