In a desperate attempt to avoid being the first against the wall when
the revolution comes, the Marketing Division of the Sirius Cybernetics
Corporation came up with a brilliant strategy. They would issue free
products to famous revolutionary leaders on *every* planet in the
galaxy.
Their chosen representative for earth was Karl Marx, who at the time was
campaigning against the use of sweatshop labour on the Indian tea
plantations. He had even written several letters to the East India
Company, threatening to boycott all tea unless something was done to end
this unethical practice.
Naturally, Marx was pleased to be given a Nutrimat vending machine of
his own. Although its "advanced tea substitute" tasted almost, but not
quite, entirely unlike tea, he vowed never to touch the real stuff
again.
As he famously explained: "All proper tea is theft!"