The Unloved
By Riquisel Yutifae
Disclaimer: You really think I own Final Fantasy 7 and all its related stuff, huh? Well then you're wasting your time thinking that way. I don't.
XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo oXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX
Dearest Helpless, intent's not as bad as the action…
The CD player in her room just switched on by itself, disturbing her deep slumber. Slowly, she opened her eyes in annoyance to look into the empty space before her. She was lying on her bed facing the left. She thought she saw something white… and she recalled that her room has brown wooden walls. "White?" she thought silently, blinking…and it was gone. Had she been dreaming again?
As she got up from bed to go to her CD player, she was running her fingers through her long dark hair. It was not as long as it was two years ago with the fishtail hairdo… it was only up to her waist now.
Marlene told her at first that she looked better with the longer hair, but she couldn't manage it anymore… and it almost always got caught in almost everything everywhere she passes by. And speaking of Marlene…
Tifa grumbled. "Marlene, this isn't funny. I told you not to switch it on while I'm asleep!" she scolded with a tired voice before switching it off. Then, she turned around to scan the room for Marlene's whereabouts. She saw that there was no one else there but herself.
Thinking that Marlene was playing a trick on her, she went over to her bed and took a peek underneath, but there was no one there. She looked down on the floor and sneezed because of the dust. "Ugh… gotta clean this place up tomorrow… it's getting dusty…" she thought before looking straight ahead again towards the other end of the bed. She frowned when she saw brown leather… shoes or boots… she wasn't sure. She couldn't recall anybody else with brown footwear… but then there's Cloud and Aerith. She instantly sat up to check if it's any of them…
But there was no one there.
Sighing heavily, she looked outside the window and saw that it was still night time. She just got up and plopped down again on her bed. "Marlene, this isn't funny!" she called out.
Silence.
She got up and went over to her closet to check if the little girl is hiding inside, but she saw nothing but her own clothes and stuff. She also took a peek under an elevated cabinet and also under her dresser and also behind her curtains, but she found no one. She just sleepily scratched her head and went over to her bed again to lie down and just decided to just close her eyes.
Moments, later, she heard the song again:
Dearest helpless intent's not as bad as the action… take a breath to distort the fear in your eyes…
Tifa got up in an instant, surprised by the noise. Her crimson-brown eyes were wide in shock and her heart was racing fast because the noise really startled her. She swallowed hard and frowned slightly as she regained composure and went over to the CD player.
I don't mean it to hurt…
She switched it off and backed away from it, sighing in frustration. She turned to the clock and she saw that it was only 3 in the morning. Knowing Marlene, the little girl would still be asleep at that hour… and would only wake up at six thirty in the morning. She never wakes up in the middle of the night, so why would she even wake up at three in the morning?
Maybe it's Barret, she thought.
She turned around again to her bed and her eyes widened in shock when she saw someone sprawled on her bed. She could not determine who it was because he/she was under her blanket. Carefully, she walked towards it, wanting to uncover it. But it moved… and blood seemed to stain it. She gasped slightly, feeling nervous as she stared at it with her wide eyes, reflecting sudden fear. She stopped in her tracks, staring horridly at the blood staining her white blanket. She took a step backward as it began to rise… and it seemed to be reaching out to her. She stepped further backward, keeping her eye on it. The right hand of the figure was exposed to her already… it looked bloody. The person had white sleeves… but beyond that, she could not see anything else. It was still moving towards her, reaching out as if to touch her…
She rushed towards the door opened it. She instantly ran outside into the hallway going to the stairs, fighting the urge not to scream, but intense fear could clearly be seen in her eyes. However, when she reached the stairs and took a first step, she stopped in her tracks and held onto the banister when she saw Cloud staring up at her from below. She was panting hard as she stared into his blue eye and studied the reflection on his face. Something about the way he was looking at her made her shudder. "C…Cloud?" she asked softly.
Cloud just kept on staring at her, unmoving. He was sulking a little and he looked too pale. But before Tifa could say something else, she saw a pair of hands creeping up Cloud's shoulders from his back and then down to his chest… and a head with a pair of big green eyes peeked from behind his shoulders, looking up at her in a rather scary way. Tifa's mouth dropped open, recognizing the young lady behind Cloud… but she could not say her name. She was too shocked to say anything else. But she knew one thing: the young lady was supposed to be dead.
Frightened out of her wits, she turned back to the hallway behind her, but she saw that the figure clad in bloody white sheets was already there, standing face-to-face with her. It touched her face.
I don't mean it to hurt…
I don't mean it to hurt…
I don't mean it to hurt…
The line from the song kept on playing repeatedly, as if the CD is like a broken record that keeps on repeating and repeating and repeating rather endlessly, tormenting her thoughts.
The figure was taller than her and Cloud… almost Vincent's height… but for sure, it wasn't Vincent because of the white sleeves that she saw.
She looked down at the ground, seeing the brown shoes that the figure in white was wearing. She knew at that instant that it was a man.
I don't mean it to hurt…
I don't mean it to hurt…
She looked up at the man in white again when he touched her face; caressing her cheek. She froze and she felt as if her heart had stopped beating. The lights flickered and the music stopped. She was taking quick sharp intakes of air and she sounded like she was gasping… The man moved closer to her and uttered in a low voice, "Love me…"
She screamed and felt herself falling backwards, away from him… down the stairs.
She felt intense pain on her back and on her head and arms and legs… and the world seemed to spin around her, but the only thing she could still see clearly was the figure in white still reaching out to her and his voice echoing in her thoughts telling her, "Love me…"
The world stopped spinning when she landed on the first floor, writhing in pain. She lingered for a moment, her vision slowly failing her. She saw Cloud and Aerith look at her, looming over her with smiles on their faces. "Welcome home, Tifa," Aerith greeted softly.
Tifa opened her mouth to say something but blood leaked out. She saw Cloud and Aerith look away from her towards another person approaching, descending the stairs. It was the figure clad in white. He slowly approached Tifa as Cloud and Aerith gave way for him. He was still reaching out his right hand to her as he said again, "Love me…"
The white sheet was slowly sliding off of him, but just when his real identity was to be revealed to her, she completely closed her eyes and lost consciousness…
XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo oXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX
He took a sharp intake of breath as if it was the first time he breathed in two years…
His whole body ached and he did not know where he was. He opened his eyes and slowly raised his right hand up to his forehead, shielding his eyes from the blinding sunlight that was hitting his face directly. He grunted as he turned to his left and slowly got up, hearing some of his bones cracking as if he hasn't moved for several years and his joints became too stiff. He felt so dazed, and he was also surprised when he saw that he was in the middle of a small street. He looked down at himself and saw that he was still wearing his same old three-layered suit. Puzzled, he looked around for a sign of anyone else in the area where he was still seated, wondering why on earth was he lying in the middle of a small street. He turned to look at a sign board which read "To Sector 6" and "to Sector 7", with matching arrows pointing towards the north and towards the west. He touched his forehead and rubbed it. He still felt too dazed, but he knew he had to get up. And he just forced himself to stand up when he saw a bicycle coming towards him with a little boy riding it. He ran towards the pavement and followed the little boy with his gaze. The little boy did not switch lanes. He still went on in a straight line as if he did not even notice that there was someone on the street and he could easily ran over him… in fact, Rufus ShinRa's foot almost got run over by the little boy because it really took him a while before he realized that the little boy had no intention of switching lanes and would really run over him if he had to.
Rufus just quietly cursed at the boy, "Watch it!" he was thinking annoyingly before he swallowed hard and rubbed his forehead again.
What happened to him?
He looked around again and stared at the signs while dusting himself frustratingly. Now his long white vest, his white trousers and his white blazer are dusty and dirty, thanks to the filthy street. He felt so disgusted. "Bloody hell…" he muttered to himself before deciding to put his hand inside one of his trouser pockets to get his mobile phone… but he realized that there was nothing inside but some loose change. He realized that maybe someone knocked him off while he was unconscious and stole his mobile phone and his wallet. Angry at the world while still feeling so dazed at the same time, he began to walk towards the street signs, staring hard at them. "Sector 6 and 7?" he thought silently, scanning the words. He could not really remember what kind of places they are, but he just decided to move on. Besides, he has to find the Turks and report to them the incident that he had been robbed. He also wanted to find a telephone where he could call ShinRa Headquarters. With that, he walked towards Sector 7.
Since he doesn't know the way around that area, he just kept on walking and walking, not even bothering to ask for directions until he felt so tired already. Being rich and pampered young man that he is, he isn't really used to such long walks… especially since he is still so dazed upon what happened to him. What happed before he regained consciousness again on the small street was a blur, and he could not remember anything.
But he could recall holding someone's hand… although it was not clear whether he was dreaming or not when it happened. All he could remember clearly was the moment when he woke up in the middle of that small street.
He saw a few passersby and approached one of them, "Pardon me,"
But he was ignored.
He tried again, but he still had no luck. How come people kept on ignoring him? Do they really hate ShinRa that much?! But they should fear him because he is a person of authority and he would not allow such disrespect to him, especially since he is the President. He even tried to run after one young man who just ignored him and went on as if he couldn't hear anything that Rufus was saying. Rufus placed his hand on the young man's shoulder to make him stop to look at him. The man did stop walking and looked over his shoulder, staring strangely at Rufus, and then shrugged off Rufus's hand from himself before running off away from him.
Rufus was stunned. "What the--?!" he thought in confusion. He was beginning to lose his patience as he decided to just search for a public payphone. With enough little patience, he finally found one. He entered the phone booth and got some of his loose change and used one of the coins to put inside the coin slot before dialing the numbers.
The computer-operated voice spoke up, "The number you have dialed does not exist."
Rufus frowned. "What the hell?!" he thought in annoyance before hanging up. His coin was ejected. He got it and picked up the receiver again, placed the coin in the coin slot and dialed the number again.
The same computer-operated voice spoke up to him, "The number you have dialed does not exist."
He repeated the process, dialing the same number over and over again… but still, he got the same results. Giving up, he just stepped out of the phone booth and took a deep breath. It was already night time. How long had he been inside the phone booth?!
He turned towards the main street with a confused look on his face and saw a cab parked by a pavement. The cab driver was just seated inside in front of the wheel and staring into empty space. Rufus looked at the cab driver rather disgustedly because he looked like a slob, but he knew he needed to get back to ShinRa so he rushed over to the cab. He did not have money to pay for the fare, but he just thought of paying the cab fare once he arrives in ShinRa. He can go inside first to get some money in his room then maybe give the man a tip too. Going home means so much to him at that moment in his life because he wanted to take a bath already and change into cleaner clothes. He got inside the cab, shut the door and told the cab driver, "To ShinRa, please."
Silence.
Rufus frowned. "Sir, could you drive me to ShinRa HQ?" he asked.
The cab driver gave a quick start with the engine and stepped on the pedal. Rufus held onto the door handle in surprise to fight the force that almost made his body crash towards one of the front seats. The speed of the cab was pretty fast and Rufus was beginning to feel nervous, even though he still appeared poker-faced throughout the ride. "Slow down!" he instructed in annoyance. On second thought, maybe he would withdraw the tip… and just report this man for reckless driving.
The man did not seem to hear him. He still maintained the same speed. Rufus looked over the man's shoulder and saw that he was holding a bottle of beer. Rufus's eyes widened. The driver was drunk. "Dammit!" he thought in more panic. What if he dies because of a car crash. "Ugh! That would be ugly! My body decapitated in a car crash?!" he thought in disgust before attempting to open the door and just jump out, but for some reason, it would not even budge. He tried rolling down one of the windows but it won't.
"Stop the bloody car! I'm getting off!" he instructed stiffly.
But the cab driver still went on.
Rufus got very impatient so he grabbed the cab driver's shoulder rather roughly, "I said stop the car!!!" he commanded angrily.
The driver's eyes widened and he instantly stepped on the brakes. The cab came to a sudden halt. The cab driver was panting hard. Rufus flipped his hair, regaining his composure before he tried to open the door again.
It opened.
Relieved, he stepped out immediately and moved away from the cab as fast as he could. He ran and ran until he reached Sector 7 again, panting hard. He continued to walk again, not wanting to stop until he sees someone who is willing to help him. But he was really tired…
Finally, he arrived at a bar. He scanned the area, and although it didn't really appeal to his tastes, he still forced himself inside because he wanted to ask for directions and maybe rest for a while. He also heard that food and drinks were cheap in Sector 7, and since he's in an establishment at that said place, maybe he could prove to himself that heard-of fact. The place was rather small and there was no one there but a young lady wearing black knitted top with a zipper in the middle, and black loose cargo shorts. She turned to him with a sweet smile on her face, "Oh hi. Welcome to the 7th Heaven Bar." She greeted mindlessly as if it's her usual line to customers. He approached the bar and took a seat. She wasn't exactly looking at him at first because her eyes seemed to linger past him… so she continued to speak, "You're the first customer for tonight," and then finally looked at him.
They stared at one another for several seconds without saying anything.
Rufus could recall her from somewhere, but he was not sure where and when he had met her. "Good evening, miss." He greeted softly.
Her smile, which had faded when she was staring at him, returned again. "Good evening, Sir…" she said.
He flipped his hair. "What do you have here?" he asked.
"Uhm… whatever you want." She replied.
He thought for a while before saying, "Just a glass of water if you may," he told her.
She stared into his blue eyes. "You seem famished too. Would you like something to eat?" she asked.
His eyes lit up when he heard that. "Oh, yes please. Thank you, miss." He told her. She giggled. "Just call me Tifa." She told him before turning away to start preparing his food.
"Alright… Tifa…" he repeated. "Does she know who I am?" he thought silently to himself while observing her. She does seem very familiar, but he could not remember anything else.
"You're not from here, are you?" she asked.
"No." he replied simply.
"Where are you from?" she asked.
"Sector 1." He replied rather uneasily. What if she found out that he's from ShinRa?
"Heehee! I knew it. I knew from the moment I first saw you step inside this place. Your clothes and your poise gave it away," she explained before facing him again, handing him a glass of cold water and a bowl of soup and a small loaf of bread. "I'm sorry, this is all the food that I have at the moment. Times are really hard nowadays…" she explained.
He stared unbelievably at her for a while before turning his gaze to the food that she had just offered to him. "…thank you." He said softly.
Tifa moved away and proceeded to clean some glasses. Rufus was watching her, suddenly losing his appetite to eat. He was aware of the poverty in Sector 7… and had been aware of it ever since he was a little boy, but never really cared… until that moment when she told him about the difficulty of the present times. "You've had your dinner already?" he asked.
She just chuckled lightly, "I don't mind not eating for a few days. I'm used to it." She told him.
"You didn't answer my question, Tifa," he pointed out sternly.
She stopped and shook her head. "Well… that's supposed to be my dinner tonight, but since it looks like you need it more than I do, I'll just give it to you," she turned her head to her side, taking a look at him from her peripheral vision. He was looking unbelievably at her but could not say anything else. He felt so guilty all of a sudden. She turned to face him again. "Your name is?" she asked.
"Rufus." He replied mindlessly.
She nodded with a smile on her face. "You know, it seems strange now… but I feel like we've met before," she said before approaching him and touched his right hand, holding it with her own two hands. She smiled sweetly at him as he stared back at her…
And then he suddenly felt some kind of invisible force pulling him away from her, although he could still feel her hands holding his.
Everything was beginning to turn so dark… and it was like he was moving farther and farther away from her in a really swift motion…
You're all I ever wanted…
His eyes widened.
…could you want me?
He felt himself landing on some hard concrete.
…Do you feel the same?
The pain that shot through his spine and to the back of his head was intense.
Love me…
"I just want to go home…"
Love me…
And everything seemed to move backwards… until he found himself inside his old office on the 70th floor of the ShinRa building. He saw some blinding light approaching him.
But he could still feel Tifa hold his hand…
He swallowed hard, his eyes wide in sudden shock upon coming into a big realization.
Then, he felt a pair of hands creeping over his shoulders, going down to his chest. He shuddered as he looked down at the hands and saw that they were black and blue. He looked towards the glass of the window and the blinding light seemed to dim a little and was moving towards him in very slow motion.
He saw his own reflection and the hands on his chest. A young lady's head peeked from over his shoulder and he just stared in horror at the reflection on the glass…
Love me…
He heard Tifa's voice whisper…
"But I do…" he thought to himself with tears in his eyes.
The young lady from behind him had a very pale face and there were dark circles around her eyes. She smiled eerily at him, "I heard that no one's ever seen you bleed or cry…"
Tears fell from his eyes when he realized that there was someone else standing beside him on his right side, holding his right hand. He was still looking at the reflection. It was Tifa wearing the same outfit from the bar. She was crying uncontrollably and sobbing lightly. She looked deathly pale and she had black and blue bruises all over her exposed skin.
"Come home with us, Rufus," the young lady from behind him said.
It was Aerith. Rufus's eyes widened further when he realized something: "Isn't she supposed to be--…"
The blinding light suddenly regained its original speed towards him and lit up much brighter than the first time he saw it.
XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo oXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX
Tifa gasped and she instantly sat up straight. She was seated on one of the chairs in her bar.
"Tifa, Tifa!"
She instantly turned to her left side and there was Rufus ShinRa seated beside her, shaking her slightly. She blinked. "R…Rufus?" she asked softly.
"Tifa," he began with a stiff look on his face.
She calmed down a little but she still felt confused. She realized that he still hasn't eaten the soup and the bread that she had offered to him.
"Are you alright?" he asked her.
She swallowed hard and nodded slightly. "I… fell asleep?" she asked.
"No, you fainted." He pointed out.
"I did?!" she asked in disbelief.
Rufus stared strangely at her, "Are you sure you're feeling alright?" he asked.
She just got up and went to the other side of the bar, "I… thought it was real!" she told him as she got herself a glass of water to drink.
"What's real?" he asked curiously.
She took a quick gulp and placed the empty glass by the sink. "I fell down the stairs and… there was this guy covered with bloody white cloth walking towards me… and then… I don't know… I thought I died!" she told him.
Rufus blinked and stared unbelievably at her. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of. What time is it anyway? I should be going home now," he told her.
She turned to the direction where the wall clock was located. Rufus followed her gaze and read the time with her: 3:00 am.
They were stunned. 3:00 am?!
They shivered.
"How long had we been here?" she asked softly.
"I… don't know…" he replied, feeling unsure.
Tifa felt so stunned. "I'm beyond closing time…" she muttered before she frantically got the washcloth to wipe the remaining glasses and put everything away. "It's late, Rufus. Do you want to stay here? I have one spare room. And old friend of mine used to occupy that room but since he moved into the Church at Sector 6…" she began.
"No, can I just use your telephone?" he asked.
"Sure, it's over there," she said, referring to the phone by the counter. Rufus approached the phone, picked up the receiver and began to dial some numbers.
The computer-operated voice spoke up again, "The number you have dialed does not exist…"
"Damn! What is wrong with this damn number?!" he thought in annoyance as he hung up in frustration before turning to Tifa again.
"Why?" she asked.
"How can I go home?" he asked in confusion.
She blinked at him. "Well… this could be your temporary home…" she said softly.
They froze when they heard some quick simultaneous thumping noises from the back as if something heavy fell down the stairs.
"What was that?!" Tifa asked in surprise, jumping in the process.
Rufus just grumpily shrugged. "I don't know. Why don't you check it out?" he asked. She turned back to him. "What if it's a burglar?" she asked with fear in her eyes.
He just stared at her. "Beats me." He muttered carelessly. She turned away from him and just rushed to the back, leaving him there. He checked the clock. It was already 3:30. How fast time flies…
But then he felt guilty about letting her deal with the burglar alone… after all, she was nice to him. So he decided follow after her, "Tifa," he called out.
But when he stepped inside the main house connected to the bar, he froze when he saw that Tifa was just standing by the doorway and staring horridly at the floor.
"Tifa," he began.
She was still staring at the floor. Nervously, he looked down to the floor, following her gaze… and saw a girl lying there with a broken neck… and she looked exactly like her!
Tifa was panting hard in fear and confusion while staring at the body on the floor. "What's going on… why am I… there?!" she thought in panic before taking a step backward and held onto Rufus's right hand as everything came back into her memory.
I don't mean it to hurt…
I don't mean it to hurt…
I don't mean it to hurt…
The song began to play again… like a broken record repeating the same lines…
She shuddered, feeling more afraid. Her grip on Rufus's hand tightened. "Rufus," she said softly, seeking comfort from him. But she froze when she felt that his hand suddenly felt so cold. She slowly turned to where he was standing next to her… and her eyes widened when she realized that he was covered in the bloody white blanket and only his right hand is exposed and she was even holding it. She heard faint girly giggles coming from somewhere and then someone just touched her right shoulder. She instantly turned to look at the person who touched her shoulder. It was Cloud, staring eerily at her. "Time to go home, Tifa," he told her.
She felt her hairs rising as she saw Aerith's hands creeping over Cloud's shoulders down to his chest and her head emerging from behind him and eyeing her eerily. "Heehee! Aren't you glad to be home with us, Tifa?" she asked sweetly.
Tifa felt another hand touch her, this time on her cheek. It was the other hand of the veiled figure… but when she looked at him again, he was not covered in bloody white blanket anymore.
I don't mean it to hurt…
You're all I ever wanted…
She stared horridly at him
Could you want me?
Tifa realized she was dead.
Love me…
XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo oXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX
-end-
Author's notes: The songs used here belong to Silverchair (Dearest Helpless, intent's not as bad as the action…and the line I don't mean it to hurt ---from the song Dearest Helpless. and Incubus (You're all I ever wanted… and the line Could you want me… ---from the song "Southern Girl"). This fic is… twisted, I know… but… this is a one-shot… Oh the strange things that enter my mind… Oo'