Author: Scealai
Rating: R for Violence and Language
Spoilers: all episodes of Season One are fair game
Summary: (FutureFic) After the demon that killed their mother is destroyed, Sam returns to a normal life and finds himself on the outside looking in when Dean picks up a new partner to hunt with.
Disclaimer: The characters from 'Supernatural' are the property of Kripke Enterprises, Wonderland, and the CW. I'll give them back after I've had my fun.

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Part One

Fire devoured and seared the air. Orange and red, and yellow flames morphing into horrible yellow eyes that glared and mocked and luxuriated in the pain it created. Screaming. Crying. Cursing. Thick black, acrid smoke that choked and caused tears to well up and course down his cheeks. A horrible agonizing scream, "No, Dad! No!"

Sam woke up with a gasp still feeling the intense heat on his face and the scream reverberating in his mind. The afterimage of the glowing flames was superimposed over the darkness of the room. He pressed the heel of his hand to his forehead hard, panting softly while his heart rate started to slow. He looked over to the other side of the room and saw the door to his bedroom. This wasn't a generic motel room in some off the map town, this was his bedroom in his apartment in Palo Alto, California. Dean wasn't sprawled in a bed across from his or hovering over him with barely concealed concern. He was God knows where hunting things that most people only saw in horror movies. They had finally destroyed the demon that had killed their mother and Jessica and it was over. It was finally over and Dean had let Sam go. He was back at Stanford. He was normal. Sam let those facts sift through his brain until his perspective could shift from his dream to reality.

With a sigh, Sam pushed the blankets off of him and sat up. He knew from experience that he was finished sleeping for the night and he might as well do something productive. At least his nightmares were now about things that had happened and not things that would happen. He hadn't had a precognitive or telekinetic event since they had destroyed the demon and he had quit hunting. He walked into the small kitchen and got some milk from the fridge and some cereal from the cupboard. He sat down at the table with his bowl of Lucky Charms. The clock ticked loudly in the silence.

When he had first come to Stanford as a freshman, the first two weeks had been agony. He hadn't expected the lack of Dean in his life to leave such an immeasurable void. He had missed Dean's soft snoring and even how Dean would occasionally kick him as he turned over in his sleep. He had missed the way Dean would tease him and ruffle his hair. He had missed his big brother who had protected him and looked after him. It was different the way he missed Dean now. He missed Dean as an actual person. He missed watching for the moment when Dean would drop his devil-may-care jackass act and really relate to the people that he helped with a compassion had astounded Sam at first. He missed how Dean would always grouse about how the coffee was bad the morning after a hunt even if he had raved about it the night before just because the rush was over. He missed cruising across the country in the Impala with the music blaring and his brother behind the wheel. He still missed the big brother things too - like how Dean would nag him about not eating or sleeping. When he looked back on the two and half years he had spent with his brother hunting and tracking their father and the demon, Sam wasn't ashamed of it like he had been of his childhood. He didn't want to brush it into the past and forget about it, it was too important to him because in his memory, the hunting was inconsequential - the important part was that he had gotten to really know his brother and he wouldn't give that up for anything.

Suddenly, Sam really wanted to hear Dean's voice. He stood up, leaving the soggy dregs of his cereal in the bowl and snagged the cordless phone from its cradle on the wall. It was three in the morning, but the odds were that Dean was still awake and if he wasn't then Sam would just get an earful of half asleep bitching or his brother's voicemail. Either way he would have accomplished his goal.

"Dean's phone," a young man's voice answered on the third ring. "Ben speaking."

"Oh." Sam tried to keep his disappointment out of his voice. "Hi, Ben, it's Sam. Is Dean around?"

"He's in the shower. We just got in from ousting a poltergeist. It was awesome, you should have seen Dean," Ben babbled enthusiastically. "And last week we tracked down a werewolf and Dean let me kill it. He said I was a natural and then we went out for a beer and he taught me the Winchester Double Bank shot and we won fifty bucks from a couple of college kids."

"That's great, Ben," Sam attempted enthusiasm for Ben's sake. The kid had idolized Dean almost immediately upon meeting him and had practically begged Dean to teach him how to hunt. A part of Sam knew he should be grateful that Dean wasn't out there alone, that he had some one to watch his back - even if it was green twenty-year-old kid who had never left his small town until the Winchesters had shown up - but instead it bugged him. He couldn't help thinking about his sixteenth birthday when Dean had gotten him a fake ID, taken him to a bar, taught him the Winchester Double Bank shot - which he had said was a Winchester family secret - and then bought him his first beer. They had won a hundred bucks from a couple of college kids. Sam really didn't feel like talking to Ben. "Uh, could you tell Dean that I called..."

"Hey, Sam," Dean interrupted Sam's brush off as he came on the line. "Are you pulling an all-nighter? Or are you doing your big brother proud and just stumbling in after an awesome toga party?"

Sam grinned, the sound of Dean's voice chasing away the lingering melancholy caused by the nightmare and his conversation with Ben. "You've been watching 'Animal House' again."

"It's a classic and Benny here had never seen it."

"Did you use that excuse to make him watch 'Ghostbusters' and 'The Shining' too?" Sam kept his voice light even though he frowned. He wished Dean wouldn't bring up Ben when they talked. Since he had left to start school he had so little time with his brother that he found himself being selfish with it. He didn't want to talk about Ben during the few phone calls a week they shared or see Ben during the few visits Dean had managed in the past six months. Unfortunately, these days Dean came with a Ben shadow and there was no avoiding it.

"Those are training videos, Sam." Dean chuckled. "Strictly business."

"Yeah, right. I barely bought that when I was ten." Sam laughed. He wandered from the kitchen to the small living room and made himself comfortable on the couch. "So, where are you?"

"Reno. It's not Vegas, but close enough. A poltergeist was tearing up a new casino. It had attached itself to the owner's little girl. She was feeling neglected because Daddy was spending all of his time with his new business and his new ex-showgirl wife." Dean's voice took on the satisfied, cocky tone that meant the hunt had went well. "We were actually well compensated for our time and trouble."

"Trouble? Were you hurt?" Sam sat up straight. Ben didn't have extensive knowledge of first-aid and he was pretty the kid was crap with stitches.

"Nah. The little darling threw a major temper tantrum and I got beaned with most of the buffet. Seafood sauce is hell to get out of your hair, Sam."

"I'll bet." Sam smiled as he pictured Dean with his hair tinged red from the sauce. He reached out and picked up the newspaper from the coffee table in front of him. The headline was circled in pen multiple times. "Are you headed anywhere in particular next? Because you are pretty close and there's something interesting around here that I'm sure you're going to want to check out."

"Really? Has something tripped your psychic meter, Sam?" Dean asked, suddenly serious.

"No." Sam shook his head." I haven't had any visions or bad feelings since...well, you know...I just know that you've been dying for a reason to poke around The Winchester Mystery House for most of your life and this would be your chance. A few tourists and a tour guide have disappeared in the house over the last few weeks. You could stay here while we check it out."

"Look, Sam, we are definitely looking into this, but I can't stay with you."

The elation at the thought of seeing his brother again was tempered with frustration over Dean's stubbornness. "Dean..."

"Sam," Dean cut him off. "I can't stay with you. I'll call when Ben and I get into town. Okay?"

"Fine." Sam sighed in defeat. At least he would get to see Dean and spend time with him like they used to.

"Sam," Dean's concerned voice broke into Sam's thoughts. "It was a bad one tonight, wasn't it?"

"Yeah." Sam rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Fire, the demon. The usual. I just...I close my eyes and I see flames, I feel heat, hear the crying and I thought...I just thought that after the demon was destroyed, this would all go away."

"I know, Sam, but it was only a nightmare about something that isn't coming back. You have the life you wanted now and you should be focusing on that."

"Yeah." Sam traced the circle around the headline with his finger. "This is my life,' he whispered.

"That's right," Dean confirmed supportively. "So, from now on, the only late nights you're going to have are going to involve studying, excess amounts of booze, or sorority girls' panties and the only nightmare you're going to have is taking the bar exam naked. Clear?"

Sam snorted. "Clear." He wished that he could tell Dean how much he meant to him. They had been through so much together that words and feelings shouldn't be so damn scary, but it was also because of that, that Sam wasn't sure he could even articulate properly how much he loved and needed his brother. So instead of trying he said, "So, what color is the ugly ass wallpaper and bedspread this time?" and hoped that Dean knew that meant he missed him.

"Green and gold. Now go get some sleep, Sam. You know I don't like you cranky." And in those words, Sam heard that Dean loved and missed him too.

---

The baby was screaming. Absurdly, Sam remembered that her name was Melinda and that this morning when they had first met the family she had smiled and squawk-laughed when Dean had made a funny face and tickled her behind her ear. Sam coughed and wiped at the tears in his eyes. The smoke in the room was thick and Sam could barely make out the crib across the room or the man bending over it.

"Dean," Sam croaked a feeble warning as the demon dressed as Melinda's father turned from him to his brother. Dean straightened from over the crib, the baby girl cradled in his arms. The red gold flames licked across the ceiling, running away from the inert female form plastered above them in a pose of horror and sadness. Sam's mind insisted on supplying her name as well, Victoria Cooper, Melinda's mother. They were too late to save her.

The demon stepped toward Dean and the baby. "Give her to me."

Dean clutched the baby closer to his chest and even as his eyes narrowed menacingly at the demon, he caressed Melinda's soft curls with his fingers and murmured soothing nonsense into her ear. Sam used the opportunity to regain his concentration. He focussed on the demon and called up the part of his mind he was finally learning to accept and control. He pushed outward and when he hit unfathomable darkness, he didn't shy away, instead he gathered his strength and gave a hard mental shove. The demon flew across the room and out into the hall where he crashed into the wall and fell to the floor unconscious.

"Nice work, Sammy." Dean smiled grimly. He nodded at the door that connected the nursery to the master bedroom. "Now let's get the hell out of here."

---

It was light outside. The sun had risen while Sam had sat on the couch remembering the beginning of the end of the Great Winchester Crusade. The birds were already chirping excitedly outside the window and he could hear the faint beeping of a delivery truck as it backed up. Sam rubbed at his eyes. He really should have gone back to bed like Dean had told him to, but it was too late now. He had a class in a couple of hours and then a study group and he had agreed to meet Jen for lunch. He had a full normal day ahead of him. Sam's gaze was drawn back to the headline of the newspaper. It wouldn't hurt to do a little extra research into the disappearances before Dean got there.

"Morning, Sam." John walked into the living room from his room. He yawned and scratched his fingers through his greying hair. "You're up early. Are you going to the library before class?" He moved into the kitchen and started preparing coffee.

"Maybe." Sam turned to face his father from over the back of the couch and regarded him cautiously. First thing in the morning was not the most ideal time to spring the news that his eldest son was headed their way, but Sam doubted that John would take that news well at any time of the day. Might as well get it over with. "Dad, I talked to Dean this morning."

"Are you having lunch with that nice girl from the coffee shop? Because if you are then I probably won't see you until late tonight, I'm putting in some extra time at the garage."

"Okay." Sam frowned. He wondered if his Dad had acted like this after he had left the family for Stanford all those years ago - like his name was no longer a recognizable word in the English language - and how the hell Dean had handled it. "Dean's in Reno," Sam persisted. He noticed a slight tightening of John's jaw, but no other reaction. "He cleared a poltergeist out of casino and things got a bit tricky." Sam paused and waited.

John poured a cup of coffee for himself and then one for his son. He walked over and handed it to Sam. "Is he hurt?" he asked quietly.

Sam shook his head. "He's fine. He even got paid for his trouble and he'll probably double it at some poker game before he leaves." Sam took a sip of his coffee and was heartened to see a faint amused smile on his father's face. He handed John the newspaper. "He's going to call when he gets into town."

"I better get started if I want to get to work on time." John tossed the newspaper onto the couch beside Sam. He turned and walked to the bathroom. "Have a good day, Sam," he called over his shoulder. A few moments after the door closed, Sam heard the shower start up.

Sam sighed. He wasn't a peacemaker. He really had no idea how to heal the rift between Dean and their Dad. Hell, he could hardly believe that there was a rift. It still felt a bit surreal to him that John had retired from hunting and moved to Palo Alto with him while Dean had taken off on his own. The demon had been wrong that horrible night he had taunted and almost killed Dean - Dean didn't need his family more than they needed him. While Dean was off hunting monsters and demons, Sam and John had settled into a normal life, but without Dean they were just two people who shared an apartment. Dean was the one who made them a family and Sam would give anything to have him back.

TBC