"This is it…Ground Zero. Any last words?"
I thought. It was difficult to say anything when you had a gun pressed between your teeth. Serena Tsukino, I thought, you've really got yourself in a mess now.
The gun came out of my mouth. When you've got a gun between your teeth, your speech is minimal.
"Um…nothing comes to mind"
Allow me to give you the low-down; we're on the top floor of Juuban High's tallest building, explosive charges in the basement will start a chain reaction, and then this school and six buildings belonging to reputable insurance and credit card companies will be reduced to rubble. How, I hear you cry, HOW did you get yourself knee-deep in such a mess?
I'd like to ask myself that question too.
"This is going to be beautiful" the raven haired girl said, stepping away to the window, holding the gun behind her back. The Raven-haired girl…sorry, Rei Hino. "Only two minutes now"
"Look, Rei…"
"Don't want to hear it" Rei replied, sharply.
I was aware that my troubles began with Rei Hino…but the real root of it? Darien Shields. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here. Not that it was his direct actions that led me here…Let's try to recap, shall we?
The self help group was a ridiculous collection of men and women feeling sorry for themselves; I think it was the Testicular cancer group I was at…the weird thing being, that nobody cottoned on that I was a 17 year old girl who was there for kicks.
"Okay Serena…" the big guy said, wiping his eyes "…you cry now"
The guy was called Andrew; he worked down the local arcade, and I hadn't been aware he even had a problem…
"Oh Serena" he burbled in my ear, like a pathetic dog "My girlfriend's gone to New York, I'm all alone…and I'm ill!"
I bet he didn't have testicular cancer; it was just paranoia.
Waitasec, let's backtrack further…
I was having trouble sleeping. My insomnia was leading me to lying awake all night on my bed watching ridiculous game-shows and soaps late at night…I find myself at school, with a pen in my hand and staring straight ahead at Miss Haruna. Nothing goes in, nothing goes out. It's a monotonous, self-deprecating mess.
"Serena?"
I looked up.
"Hm?"
"Have you done your work?"
"Uh nearly…"
She eyes me, and walks off. I stare after her. No reason, of course.
All of a sudden, I'm on the bus home. Then I'm in my room, with the phone in my hand, a plate of sandwiches in front of me; buying Morgan or Topshop stuff, ordering small pieces of pointless furniture from Ikea…my life consists of this, a consistency of moving images that link together to form an incomprehensible whole.
One night, I was out walking; I caught myself wandering into a local hall, where a self-help group was starting their session. I slapped a sticker on my school lapel, gave myself he name of 'Doric' and sat down. It was a new beginning. This is where I met Andrew, where I got a new lease of life. I saw him sitting somewhere to my left, he looked bashful, and smiling nervously. He walked over to me, and put his hand out. I accepted it, and he took me into his arms, hugging me tightly to his chest.
"Oh Serena" he poured out his heart and soul into my ear "…I'm such a failure"
Different from earlier, I know but repeating it would just make it as monotonous as my life. Suddenly…I felt a burst of emotion, and I started to cry too. We cried and cried and cried. All of a sudden, I can sleep. I became addicted, Tuberculosis on Monday nights, Incest Survivors on Wednesday, Testicular Cancer on Saturday, Bowel Cancer on Sunday…Suddenly, I was alive again. But then…he appeared.
Him.
Darien Shields wandered in on Saturday night, and without barely pausing to remove the cigarette from his mouth said
"This testicular cancer?"
He was there. Everywhere. Darien was there every night; I was angry, and felt lost…Suddenly, I couldn't sleep again. My insomnia had returned. Darien…Darien…that little itch on the roof of your mouth that would only heal if you stopped scratching it. He was a tourist. A faker. Like me.
Damn it, why did he have to ruin everything? It wasn't fair.
On the Friday night, he was there, pouring some coffee for the break.
"Hey" I said.
He turned, looking down at me. I was way shorter than him.
"Hey" he replied.
"I'm onto you, Darien" I said, prodding him.
"What?" he asked, narrowing his eyes.
"You're a faker" I accused "A tourist, you're not suffering from TB, Bowel Cancer or anything…"
"…neither are you" he replied, grinning a little.
"Hug again everyone!" A voice announced.
I reluctantly embraced Darien.
"Don't do this" I urged "I need this, I can't sleep without these nights"
"Neither can I" he replied, still icily "You're going to have to find some other way to sleep if you don't like it"
"Oh shut up" I spat, before we let go.
He shrugged, and put his bag on his shoulder.
"Sorry, no deal" he said, before walking out.
I found myself following him into the bright, dangerous night.
"Darien!" I called.
He turned back.
"Why don't we select nights?" I asked.
He looked at me, and considered this.
"Sure; I get TB, Incest and Testicular"
"Nuh-uh!" I said, putting my foot down "I live for incest!"
He raised an eyebrow in amusement.
"I'm gone" he said, before turning away again.
"Hey!" I replied, running up to him "How about I get incest, Bowel and testicular, you get the rest"
He thought, and looked at me blankly.
"Okay" he said, in clipped tones "You got a deal"
Perhaps it was because of this weird relationship I was now in that I ended up meeting Rei Hino. This new way of thinking, Darien's whole interference…it's his fault.
It was on the bus that I met her. Rei Hino.
END OF PART 1