August. It was an unusually sunny day in Forks, Washington. I woke up because of a sharp pain in my abdomen, it was only 6 am on a sunday. I moaned, It was way too early to get up. I stroked my belly. "Why can't you let mommy sleep a bit longer?" I whispered. I decided it was no use going back to sleep. I got up and hurried downstairs to make breakfast. I ate my portion in just three bites, I didn't feel like bumping in to Charlie.. considered.
I hadn't told Charlie yet, I hadn't told anyone for that matter. It was even too hard for me to grasp that this was reality. I really hoped I'd wake up and find myself in Edward's arms, wake up with a flat stomach. I wished all this was just a nightmare. But deep down I knew it wasn't. I was going to be a mother soon, and I wouldn't be able to hide it much longer. I was scared shitless.
I rushed back upstairs. I let the shower run, undressed myself and stood under the hot water. It calmed me down. Charlie would head out soon. It was really hectic at the station, he had to go to work even though it was sunday. People went missing, bodies were found torn apart by an animal. I turned off the water, took a towel and wrapped it around me and went back to my room. I decided to write to Renée, while I was waiting for Charlie to head out.
About an hour later I heard Charlie call me: "Bells, thanks for breakfast, I'm going to the station. See you tonight." "Bye dad" I replied, but I had already hear the door close. I took my time getting my stuff, I decided to enjoy the sun. I took a blanket, some drinks and a book and head out. I spread my blanket on the lawn at the back of the house. I didn't want to be seen. Not if I could avoid being seen.
I lied down, felt the warmth of the sun on my face. I wore big shirts, desperately tying to hide the evidence. No one could know, not now, not yet. The sun reminded me of another sunny day, one of the few of those days here in Forks. It was colder though, at the beginning of this year.
Edward was gone. He had been gone for 7 months. The day he left was painfully vivid in my memories. He'd left a hole. A hole at the place where my heart was supposed to be. But sometimes I seemed to be whole again. When I was with Jacob I could smile. Jacob was my best friend for some months now. After my dad forced me to hang out with people again. I had been a zombie. Jacob got life back into me. I knew Jacob loved me, I loved him too, but I didn't love him the same way. Edward was my life, Jacob my best friend. But that one day changed everything.
The weather was nice, not warm but that wasn't important as Jake was nearby. We went to the beach, we sat down where we had sat where I heard the Quilleute legends. It was cold, and Jake felt I was shivering. He pulled me closer and put his arm around me. I was so grateful that he was so warm. I tried to remember if it had always been that way. Jake was my personal sun, he'd been so for some time now. But the reason was his general happiness and his amazing smile, it never had anything to do with his body heat. Thinking of the legends, reminded me of Edward and I burst into tears.
Jake pulled me even closer, he was tightly hugging me. He stroked my hair out my face and whispered: "It's ok Bells, it's ok, I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you." We stayed like that for some time. It felt good to lie in his strong arms, maybe it was just me but it looked like every time I saw him he got taller and more buff. He was beautiful. My beautiful sun.
After that things went so fast. He started stroking my back with one hand and looked me deep in the eyes. Had Jake's eyes always been that mesmerizing? He came closer and put his soft lips gently against mine, when he saw I didn't resist, he pressed them harder against me. Jake was kissing me? But I couldn't bring myself to stop him. He bit my lower lip gently and licked my lips. He asked for his tongue to be invited in my mouth. Without really thinking about it, I opened my mouth and let our tongues entwine. His kiss became more passionate, more needy, and my body followed his lead.
Suddenly his hands were beneath my shirt. I'm not going to lie, his warm hands felt good against me. With one hand he removed my bra. He took my breasts into his hands and squeezed, it seemed like it fit perfectly. Deep down I knew I shouldn't let him continue, I shouldn't be leading him on. He was my best friend, but to him I was so much more. I couldn't bring myself to stop him though. It felt so nice to be touched so gently, with care, but with an underlying urge. He wanted me, he needed me, no matter how screwed up I was. His need became stronger, he pushed me down. He was so close to me, I didn't think we could get any closer to each other. I felt his member pressing against me through our pants, it was hard as stone. I tried to forget my thought about 'stone', but with Jake around it wasn't difficult to do so. He took off his shirt, he was so hot. I knew Jake was muscular by the sight of his arm, but I had never seen his abs before. He tore my shirt off. Jake was always so caring, even now, but not even once it had crossed my mind that there could be a beast inside. He took of my jeans in one swift move and let his hand run down my body. It gave me chills, in an unexpectedly good way. I felt myself getting wetter by the second, I couldn't stop myself from blushing. He noticed. "Bells, there's no need to blush. God, you're so sexy. I need you, now" He started kissing me again, this time a lot rougher than before and I threw away my shame. He put his hand in my panties and looked in my eyes. He gently entered with his finger. I moaned. It felt so good. He started to nibble my ear. He took his hand out of my panties and licked his finger. "Bells you taste so good." I pulled him closer to me and tugged at his pants. I was jealous at how gracious he had removed my pants and he decided to help me a bit. I took his large dick in my hands and felt it pulsating. "Jake take me, NOW!" I heard myself say. I couldn't believe what I just said, but he seemed all too pleased. He entered me with caution, careful not to hurt me. How could this feel so right, when it was so wrong? From that moment I gave myself completely. His hard thrusts made me moan so loud, I was glad we were alone on the beach. Jake kept on caressing my breasts and kissing me. That moment I forgot everything, the time, the place, my love for Edward and the miserable last few months of my life. It was just me and Jake, me and my sun. And it felt complete. We went to our climax. He bit my nipples. His breathing fastened, mine did too. I was about to come. I grabbed his butt and pushed him deeper inside. He came first. I felt his hot cum pore inside me. At that time I came too. Ecstasy was a suitable way to describe it. I'd never forget this moment. Jake fell exhausted next to me, still pressing me against him.
I opened my eyes and decided to read a bit. That's when I heard something move between the trees. I couldn't see anything, when suddenly Jake came forward. "Jake" I jumped up and thought of running towards him. I wanted to hug him so badly. But I couldn't, If I'd hug him, he'd find out. I wanted to tell him, he was going to be a father. I couldn't possibly ruin is life, he was so young. Nobody could ever find out Jake was the dad of my child, not even when I tell Charlie.
Jake smiled, but it wasn't my smile. He forced himself to smile. "Bells" "how are you, Jake?" Things had been awkward between us for the last two months now. Since I found out about the pregnancy, i tried not to get too close to Jake. I was scared he'd find out, if he did I'd have to explain. There will be a time when he'll find out that I'm having a baby, but I needed some time. I needed to have my explanation ready, "Bells, why are you being so distant? What's wrong?" "Nothing is wrong Jake." I smiled. It wasn't very convincing, even I knew that. "Bells, I can see something is going on. You know you can tell me anything." I wanted to be with him, I wanted to cry in his arms. I wanted to tell him what was going on. But I couldn't, for his sake. "Jake, i think it's best if you would go now. I'm tired. " "It's only 12 O'clock." "Jake, please." I saw the pain in his eyes when he left. When I couldn't see him anymore, I fell on my knees. I started crying. Doing this hurt so much, but I had no choice.