Movie Time: Making "The Mirror-Ash Saga"
By: Bryce Daniel (2016)
"So, Meyer," Alexa said. "I take it you saw Julie's report last night."
"Yeah," he replied dejectedly. "And no matter which way you look at it - it's still MY fault."
"What are you talking about?"
"If I – or the mirror version of me - was a better parent…"
"You cannot blame yourself for what for your MIRROR-self may or may not have done. Look at how your REAL children act: Clemont is a GYM LEADER for the largest city in Kalos and his sister cares more about pokémon than most adults I've met. How many single-fathers do you know who can make THAT claim? Not many I'd venture!"
"How many of said so-called 'fathers' can say they sent the mirror-versions of their own children to their DEATHS? I mean come on, how do you think they ended up in Coumarine City anyway?"
NOW he had her attention.
"Whoa, wait a second, back up – you mean they were in Lumiose City before they met Ash – Mirror-Ash – in Coumarine City?"
"Yeah, they appeared in my shop out of nowhere," he recounted as Alexa started writing furiously. "They threatened to destroy not only my shop but Clembot as well unless I told them exactly where Ash was."
"You're 'Mirror-Ash' aren't you," Nurse Joy asked. "I saw the report last night, and it just pains me that my cousins and I could be so cruel to the trainers we're supposed to support – some things are bigger than money."
"Fortunately, they're gone now," Ritchie said. "The pokémon and trainers of THIS world are being treated by people who actually CARE about pokémon."
"Yeah, t-thank you, Nurse Jo- AAAAGH," he said feeling someone tapping him on the shoulder. He turned around quickly to find himself two inches from a live camera.
"Hehehe"
"ZORUA! I told you not to do that! Sorry about that, Ash, I was hoping I'd run into you here. Yeah, you see, I also saw that report and knew I HAD to film it for my next movie. Are you alright, you look like you've seen a Ghost-type."
"Y-yeah, I'm f-fine... I guess..."
"'Movies?' 'MOVIES,'" Mirror-Luke shouted. "I don't have time to screw around playing over glorified dress-up games – I've got WORK to do! Now either buy a ticket or get the fuck lost!"
"ASH," Ritchie shouted sharply. "You're spacing out again. I'm pretty sure he's not a 'bad guy' either."
"That depends which paper you read," Luke said as his Zorua laughed softly.
"They didn't like YOU either if I recall, but, anyway, can I count you two as my first actors for my 'Mirror Ash Saga?'"
"Sure," Ritchie said.
"F-fine…I guess. I've already b-been on c-camera once t-this week..."
"You assumed they were talking about the REAL Ash didn't you," Alexa asked. "So you sent them to a city he'd already been to in order to buy him some time?"
"Yes, but how was I supposed to know the 'Ash' they were looking for was heading that way? I was lucky Clemont – 'Mirror-Clemont' - decided NOT to 'torch' the shop as his sister suggested."
"Sorry, I just can't picture sweet little Bonnie acting like that. I mean - not that I don't believe you – but, um, do have video of this?"
"I'm sure Clembot has the incident in his archives… but you'd be better off with the security footage from the shop."
"Because it'll be clearer?"
"No, because I can access the tape easier than I can Clembot's hard drive, soft drive or whatever they call it. My son is a whiz at stuff like that, but his ol' man can't even turn on the laptop he got for Father's Day."
"How 'bout this: you retrieve the surveillance video and I'll ask Clembot if he can locate the incident on his server. At the end of the day, hopefully, we'll have ourselves a cover story."
"Yeah, 'Local Store Owner Sells Own Kids Out – Entire Dimension Destroyed.' I can't wait to explain THAT to my customers."
"Oh, Jenny," Alexa said picking up a coffee on her way to the gym. "Any news I should know about?"
"Nah, I just got back from helping my cousin in Shalour City investigate a case about some thieves causing trouble dressed as our city's Gym Leader and his friends."
"Really," Alexa said pulling her notebook out again.
"…But it turned out to be nothing. If it wasn't for the view from the top of the tower, it would've been a completely wasted trip."
"Shalour City, huh, that's out near Coumarine City, right?"
"Yeah," Jenny said as if it was obvious.
"Do you have any similar reports in that area? I'm working on a story about a similar group of troublemakers here in Lumious City. Any information you give me could be extremely helpful – to BOTH of us."
"See," Iris shouted as she burst into the Pokémon Center. "I told you we'd make to the Pokémon Center before dinner! Oh would you hurry up already! Gah, I swear if you were any slower we'd have to change your name to Ash!"
When she turned back into the lobby, there were two "Ashes" standing there with their arms crossed.
"Wait there are TWO of you now," she said until she saw Luke out of the corner of her eye. "Oh right, I get it now, this is a game: 'Which one is the REAL Ash.'"
"That's easy," said a voice from behind her. "Neither of them are the 'Real' Ash."
"Oh n-no, n-not CILAN," Ash said jumping behind Ritchie's back.
"You call THIS 'food," Mirror-Cilan shouted throwing the carefully crafted plate in Ash's face. "What the fuck did you do, scrape it directly from A GRIMER'S ASSHOLE? Start over, you worthless ingrate!"
"What's with him," Iris asked. "He's acting like a bigger kid than us-"
"Shh," Cilan whispered. "I'll explain it to you later."
"You can come out now, Ash," Ritchie said reassuringly. "This isn't the Mirror-World anymore. He's not going to hurt you."
"SHE migh-OW, but I won't."
"Good to know," Luke said. "Now, you wouldn't happen to know where I can find a pair of actors do you?"
"How…many…badges…do…you…have?"
"I'm not here for a gym battle," Alexa said. "I'm here to ask you about an incident in your shop a few weeks ago."
"Please…enter…Ms…Alexa," he intoned as the door opened in front of her.
Alexa entered the battlefield and explained her assignment to the robotic Gym Leader.
"Yes…I…remember…that…incident…I…can…project…it… ahead…of…us… if…you…wish."
Seeing the kids she THOUGHT she knew, act like that made her both sad and angry at the same time (though she'd tell you she was a "detached observer"), but knowing that no other trainers would have to deal with their evil behavior - which matched Mirror-Ash's description of it perfectly - still gave her a morbid satisfaction.
"Do…you…need…to…see… the…video…again?"
"No, but could you send a copy to my work e-mail? I'll ask my editor if we can use it on our website."
"Done…I…am…looking…forward…to…reading…your…article."
"Thank you, Clembot. I just wish I looked forward to WRITING it…"
True to form, Officer Jenny had a copy of her cousin's report on Alexa's desk before she returned to the newsroom. As she sat down to write her article, a young man approached her and gave her a VHS shaped package with her name on it.
She got a third of the way through her writing when her editor appeared behind her, and she explained her story to him and both of the videos she had. He seemed happy about it being a "front page story," and he even took her VHS tape with him though what he was planning to DO with it was a mystery to her.
When he left, she read the Jenny's report and noticed the dates didn't quite add up. This essentially killed her "multi-city reign of terror" narrative, but she knew facts had a nasty habit of not fitting convenient "narratives." Besides, she felt she had enough information for a compelling story without these "extra" incidents. She just hoped her editors agreed with her…
"This story is great," Luke said reviewing their script. "…But it's still missing something. It's a good ending… but the viewer isn't really given a reason to be 'scared' of Mirror-Clemont and Serena."
"Bark," Zorua cried motioning toward a nearby television.
"BREAKING NEWS," Malva shouted dramatically. "MTV has just learned the so-called 'Mirror Children' from last night's report apparently started their ill-fated reign of terror in Shalour City before moving onto Lumiose City where we have just obtained this SHOCKING video of a store owner under siege…"
"Well, isn't THAT convenient," Iris said sarcastically.
"I believe the technical term is 'Dues Ex Machina' – a trope in which 'unexpected characters, events or ab-'"
"Oh brother, you'd think he'd learn by…Wow, those kids really ARE crazy!"
"…That help solve a previously unsolvable problem.' Unless it's a 'Coincidental Broadcast'…"
"Is he STILL prattling on? Do you think we can use this story in our movie?"
"Sure," Luke said. "But only if we change the name to 'Clemdroid' or something and make Real-Clemont his inventor – ooh and make the shopkeeper the 'Real-World' version of their dad."
"The only problem is," Luke said as they walked through the plaza. "We're going to have to find new actors for the shopkeeper, Serena and-"
"I thought I was playing Serena!"
"Sorry, but I'm sure we'll find another part for y-"
"Oh, Luuuuke," a voice exclaimed from behind him. "I thought I recognized that cute little Zorua."
"Oh God," Iris said burying her face in her hands as Zorua whimpered and hid behind Mirror-Ash's back.
"I t-take it, s-she isn't actually the 's-smartest trainer in all Unova.'"
"Nah, Ashy-Boy," her companion said. "You'll just to settle for the 'smartest trainer in KANTO.'"
"Great timing," Luke said. "You'll be perfect for Serena! But who are we getting to play Scotty? Hmm, Ritchie isn't in any scenes with him so…"
"N-no," Ash said glancing over at Gary knowingly. "I-I've got s-someone BETTER in m-mind…"
"'Someone better,'" Luke asked. "How? Cilan is playing Clemont and Professor Oak, Bianca is Serena, Zorua is Bon-"
"Wait," Iris interrupted. "How is ZORUA playing Bonnie?"
"Hrmph," Zorua (as Bonnie) snorted turning away from Iris while flipping her hand towards her tetchily.
"No, I mean, doesn't Bonnie have, you know, LINES in the script? Who's going to re…"
"See? I TOLD you we'd 'find a part' for you. As for Scotty… I don't see Gary playing him as they share a scene together so that leaves Ritchie…"
"A-and s-someone else," Ash said nodding over to Gary who pulls a green fashion wig out of the mirror-trainer's bag and plops it on Luke's head. "Now for the matching vest, orange c-cut-off tie and a beige pokéball notebook and… ta-da, we've g-got our s-selves a character!"
"ARRRGH," Mirror-Ash shouted.
"What is it," Iris asked.
"No matter wh-what I do, this outfit j-just does. Not. WORK!"
"Can't you just MAKE it work?"
"O-one does not s-simply 'make' f-fashion work. If y-you have to 'MAKE' it work, t-then it doesn't 'work!' Period."
"I don't know," Cilan said looking over his blue and yellow jumpsuit in the side mirror. "I think it looks pretty darned good on me. What do you think?"
"NO," Ash and Iris shouted simultaneously.
"Maybe, if I try his bag oooon," he said straining to lift it. "Sweet tea and crackers, what did you put in this thing?"
"Humph," Gary said lifting Clemont's bag effortlessly. "You call yourself a 'science nerd?' Bah, you wouldn't last ten seconds in the field."
"Hey, Bee," Gary shouted. "Would you come over here and work your magic on this bag."
"'Maaagic,'" Ash said distantly.
"Oh please," Bianca said. "There's no 'magic,' silly, you just have to know how to pack things. Trust me, it's more of a science than anything else."
"Ex-zactly – 'no magic' t-that's IT – T-THAT's the problem here!"
"Oh no," Bianca said rustling through Clemont's bag. "The problem is the weight is badly distributed. Move this here…lay that flat…toss this in the side compartment…stack everything else on top. NOW, try it."
"N-no," he said cutting her off and turning her towards Gary. "Y-YOU try it…. Oh much better, now take t-this s-staff…and SQEEE it-it's p-peerfect!"
"Don't do that again," Gary said.
"But whaat about MEEEE," Cilan whined. "I thought I was supposed to be Clemont!"
"N-no," Ash said pulling a charcoal colored helmet out of his bag. "I've got a b-better idea for you..."
(To be continued…)