by deprived
homepage:envy.nu/invader
Yet another weird fic....I'm thinking of adding chapters to it and making in ongoing .....
Zim and Gir were sitting on the couch and watching a movie.It was about a troop of girl scouts that used magic and martial arts to rescue their cookies from an evil overlord.Zim leaned forward,fascinated."What kind of power do these scouts wield?I must have it...." At the end of the movie the scout leader said "Girl Scouts have the power!Contact your local scout chapter to get involved."
Zim's brow furrowed as he thought to himself"I must gain this power.With it,I can subjugate this entire planet.... I know! I will become one of these girl scouts....they will be happy to accept me.I am an invader after all." he laughed maniacally.
The next day Zim went to his local scout chapter.There was a very large,fierce looking woman at the front desk.She wore a sash that said 'Scout Master'."Heeelooo Scout master....I am Zim.I wish to join your girl scouts."
The scout leader scowled and said "Your a little green boy...this is the girl scouts.Only girls can join the girl scouts." Zim squinted his eyes "You will regret this day......scout master..." he said.
He walked home and went in his subterranean lair."It seems one must be a female to join these scouts ...damn those filthy humans!I must have this power....Hmmmm...I can disguise myself as a female.It shouldn't be too hard to fool these idiotic humans.Yes.I will disguise myself as a girl and when I have the power nothing will stop me.Nothing!My doom shall rain on their heads like DOOM!Muhahahahahaha!"
Zim programmed his computer and walked inside the capsule.When he got out he had long blond hair with a huge pink bow in it,mounds of makeup on,and huge breasts.Zim wobbled a bit and stood straight.
When Gir saw him he started laughing."Stop that Gir!Noone laughs at an invader!I will cru...." Zim's breasts were too heavy for him and he fell on his face.Gir laughed so hard he fell down,spinning in circles on the floor. Zim glared at him from the floor."Help me up Gir!"
Zim went back into the capsule and came out with smaller breasts."There,that's better" he patted his new breasts.He walked over to Gir and said."Gir.You will come with me and monitor the situation.If I'm in trouble I want you to use this secret weapon." He handed Gir a gray box."Just press the red button." Gir saluted Zim."Yes master." "When we return I shall have the secret power of the girl scouts.We will live like kings.Kings I tell you!" Zim said.
Zim strode into the scout building,wobbling a bit in his high heels.He slammed his hands on the scout masters desk and said"Helloooo....I am a girl human.I want to become a girl scout."
The scout master peered into Zim' eyes.She walked around his body looking him up and down.Zim started to sweat."Aren't you the same little green boy that came in earlier?" she asked.
"No!I am some.....other...person.My name is.....Tina.Yeah,Tina...um...Rock.Now tell me how to join the girl scouts" he said. "Well...first you fill out these forms" she said,handing Zim some papers and a pen.Zim took them and sat down.He looked at the form and filled it in.He handed the completed forms back to the scout master and asked"When do I get the protective armor?"
"The protective....oh!You mean the scout uniform.Yeah,I suppose I can find out that fits you." she said.She went into the back for a minute and brought out a package."Here.Come back dressed in this at six o'clock tonight.Were having an initiation party." Zim walked out.
Zim found Gir creeping behind the bushes."Gir,you will stay here.Observe these girl scouts and report to me later.I will go home and prepare for tonight." he said and went home.
Zim arrived at the scout building at six.When Gir saw him he whistled."You look pretty master.Wanna go dancing?"he asked. "No.Just stay here and wait for my signal." Zim said.Zim was distracted by a few balloons tied to the doorknob."Hmmm....could this could this be some sort of a secret weapon?" he said.He poked one of them and it popped."Ahhhhh. Foul humans! They have somehow trapped the enterance!How dare they!" he screamed. The door opened and the scout master said "That you Tina?Well come on in." she grabbed Zim by the shoulder and dragged him in.
They walked to a room in the back where about a dozen scouts were gathered.They were playing pin the tail on the donkey. "Girls!Girls!GIRLS!SHUT UP!" the scout master yelled.The girls went quiet and she said "This is Tina,our newest member. Everyone make her welcome." she said.
The scouts gathered around Zim."Hi!I'm Ragou!Wanna play pin the tail on the donkey?" a pink haired little girl asked."What sort of ritual is this pin the tail on the donkey?" he asked."It's a game...come on..we'll show you." Ragou said.She led Zim into the middle of the room.One of the girls put a blind fold on him.
"Were going to spin you around and around.When you stop spinning you have to try to pin this on the donkey." she said.They spun him around and around."Hey..stop this..Stop I say!" he yelled.They stopped spinning him and handed him a piece of paper with a tack attached to it.Zim had never been dizzy before.He fell forward and the tack imbedded itself in his thigh."You evil humans! It was a trap all along...AHhhhhhhh!It hurts..it hurts...Gir!Use the secret weapon!" he yelled.
Gir pressed the button and an explosion rocked the building.As the girls were running around in panic a purple light shot out of the secret weapon."Ohhh...pretty light.." Gir said.Bees started swarming around the scouts.Zim ripped off the blind fold and laughed."Run you filthy himans!Feel the wrath of.....the bees. Yessss...Ahahahaha." he laughed harder and harder until he fell on the ground"Ow...That hurt!" he said.He got up and limped towards Gir."Come Gir!We may have lost the power this time but there will be others...we will gain this power or my name is not.....INVADER ZIM!".Gir smiled and asked "Can we get a slushy on the way home?" "Yeah sure...whatever..." Zim replied.
the end