Wes, Wes…Wes .That's all I think about, he's all I think about. He's everything I wanted. I lay beneath my covers, to try to take in his smell, try to savior his aftertaste. I realized now more then ever that I loved Wes, that I never stopped loving him, even when I told myself that I didn't love him, that I never loved him, that I couldn't love him, that I shouldn't love him.
I clutch the cover sheets to my chest, tears began to linger through my face…
Wes. How could you be so blind, how can you not see that I'm crazy for you
Beautiful Wesley, we been friend for so long, so many years, so many secrets, so many moments. But you never did notice that I began to change, you didn't notice my eyes always traveling your body, always staring at your eyes longing for you to look at me the same, longing for the moment I can kiss your soft petal lips.
But there was always her, that girl that stole your heart, the girl you proclaim to love. The one with the long blonde hair, the one with the small nose, lips firm with red lipstick, green eyes and delicate face, the one that had curves that you were always drooling about, that damn women that stole you away, the women that broke your heart.
Flashback
"Thad" I was sitting in my desk, when a small figured came rushing to my side. He tackled me to the ground, I was about to pull away and object when I heard his soft whimpers. Wes held me tight his arms around my backside. Seeing him with tearful eyes, masking his pain I embraced him tightly.
"She cheated on me" his sobs were louder, and my heart was unstill.
"Sweetie I'm sorry" the words slip right out of my mouth but Wes laid his head on my neck and time froze, no words were needed, as our bodies collided, his breathing pressing through my neck, drove me wild. I held him tighter, the atmosphere felt heavy, Wes caught his breath and inhale deeply his soft whimpers echoing through the room.
"I gave her my heart and she-she" I rubbed the temples of his hands, his body warming up to my touch I could feel his temperature rising, realizing our position; we held our breath, his lips looking so inviting so delicious. I used every force of my body to stop myself from pressing my lips to the beautiful man laying right beside me.
"Thad I" the door swung open, Jeff steered himself inside, wide eyes shocked
"I'm sorry did I interrupt something" Wes turn to face him, tears streaming down his beautiful face, faster then lightning Jeff was at Wes side comforting him as well, Wes was our leader seeing him vulnerable was a rare sight, all of the warblers cared so deeply for each other, Wes was close to everyone especially David, Blaine and I, but David left for the weekend with his parents and Blaine went to stay with his boyfriend for the weekend, Wes was my closes friend. As Wes held me tighter I realize, everything came rushing back, the feeling I tried to hide. I was in love with Wes beyond reason…
Holding my pillow I tried to stop the tears from rolling down, but to no avail did I accomplish that, all I could think about was his voice. A light went off, my phone vibrating took me out of my trance
Thnxs for everything! Love you Thad, you're the best =D
My heart began to sink, The words pierced through my soul. It's been a few hours since I last saw Wes and already I missed the warmth of our bodies, I knew I shouldn't feel this way especially since I had a boyfriend, a boyfriend in which I liked, I liked him a lot he made me feel a little better but there was always the but, he was not Wes.
I picked my phone answering a reply
Ur welcome Wesey, I do anything (backspace)
Ur welcome Wesey =D (sent)
I drifted to sleep as soon as I sent the message, wanting to dream, wanting to dream and think about the beautiful gorgeous man that was Wes.
Early in the morning, I felt a pair of hands roaming my body, beginning to travel back and forth between my thighs and waist, mmmhm Wes I moaned in my sleep, the sudden touch froze and I realize that I was dreaming of Wes, I flutter my eyes open and saw the man with a shock expression, his brown eyes shocked his body tensed.
"What did you call me" his voice was shaky
"I…" my words were coming out
"You were dreaming about him, I thought you got over your silly crush, what the hell Thad!, I thought we had something special, we been together for almost three months and you still think of that prick!" I could see in his the hurt, the betrayal, but I could not muster the courage to reply
"I thought you loved me" he spat the words with rage
"I do it's just that I"
"That you what you can't seem to get over your silly stupid crush"
"It's not that it's just that I never realize that I love him"
"God your disgusting, you know that he will never choose you, he will never love you"
My head found the floor more entertaining to look at, I didn´t even realize when my tears began to prick un controllably.
"I just" in an instant the doors flung open
"What did you do to him" I heard him, and with all my strength I looked up, locking eyes with the most beautiful creature I ever saw, but I did not intended to clash our bodies together, the man held me not understanding why but soothing my back with so much tender and love.
"I did nothing! But told him the truth" the truth I thought boy did I hate the truth with an irony passion " the truth about" before he even had chance Wes took me protectively in his arms and tighten his grip
"I don't want to hear it or care, you hurt Thad and that's enough to set me off" he took me by surprise as he lead me away from the room. I could still hear Flints warning from the inside of the room, I could still hear the noises but nothing matter I held the most beautiful man in my arms although I knew I should have felt ashamed, I hurt the man that gave me only tender and care. But in my defense I never ment to hurt him I just…
"Thad, are you ok?"
"yes a little shocked, but now that you're here" I slip his hand in mine
"Yes I'll be here no matter what"
My smiled was bright but it soon became a frown for the last words that he spoke "What are friends for"
And with that my heart died a little bit inside