She hates this feeling. And it's not because she doesn't know what it is. She knows. And it hurts. It hurts because it's him, and they're in a hospital, and this shouldn't be happening, but it is.
Fear is not something that Alex Eames is comfortable with feeling, but it is fear that has overtaken her now. It has been years since she was last on her knees, praying. But she's there now, with her eyes closed, desperately begging God not to take him from her.
Guilt is something that she's felt more often than she cares to remember. And she's feeling it again. She should have been there covering him, but she wasn't. And now he's hanging in the balance, and she's fine, and she hates it, because he doesn't deserve this.
Silence falls with the tears she feels streaming down her face. He is all she's ever wanted, and all she'll ever need. The thought of losing him hurts, more than she can bear. She isn't sure she'll be able to carry on without him, and at the same time, knows that he would want her to. And that thought is the one that hurts the most.
The bright lights hurt her eyes when she leaves the hospital's chapel to go back to the waiting room where everyone else is. She finds it ironic that in a moment, everything really can change. That in a moment, her life can go from normal to chaotic.
And as she walks, she cannot help but feel that the avenging angels have been called to punish her for something she has done wrong.