32. How Many Snakes Are We Talking About?

Germany sat at his living room couch with all his dogs sitting around him and a plate of wurst and a beer in front of him. He had planned his day off carefully, seeking the most efficient way to maximize relaxation.

This would make up for the last hellish work week he had just finished. He leaned back and turned the tv on to a soccer game. Yes, he calculated a 30% relaxation increase.

His cell phone rang. On the screen flashed a photo of his brother.

"Please don't make me go anywhere," he prayed quickly and picked up.

"Bruder?"

"Aaah, West, I'm so happy to hear you," said his brother with a hint of despair in his voice.

The front door slammed open and closed, and his dogs jumped up excitedly.

"Germany! Germany! I heard it was your day off so I brought pasta and a gift for you!" Said Italy in a singsong voice.

"Are you alright Bruder?" Asked Germany, lifting a hand to let Italy know where he was. A delicious smell filled the house. Wurst and Italian pasta, his relaxation and happiness levels increased fast.

"Well, remember that zoo party at France's?"

"No"

"Ah, I didn't tell you?"

"No"

"W-well it was a blast. But-," his brother gave a little choked screech.

"Bruder?"

Italy wandered into the living room. He wore a long tan trenchcoat along with a hat, and Germany glared at him. Why han't he taken that off? It was too hot for that today.

"Is that Prussia? Tell him I say hi!"

He bent over to leave the plate in the coffee table in front of him and germany noticed he didn't seem to be wearing any pants under the trenchcoat.

"Long story short," continued his brother. "We lost control of the snakes and now Spain and I are trapped in a closet with a bunch of them."

Italy took off his hat to reveal a bow on top of his head, and winked at Germany, who turned completely red.

"Spain is unconscious though…or asleep I have no idea. The absinthe did it for him."

"Uhuh," said Germany. Italy opened the top button of his trenchcoat. He wasn't wearing a shirt. He was, in all probability, not wearing anything underneath.

"Uff, tell Prussia to hurry, it's too hot with this thing!" said Italy

"I have no idea what kind of snakes they were. But…I can…West there's one on my thigh…" kept saying Prussia.

"Uhuh"

"Then what are you waiting for?! Come get me out of here!"

Germany bit his lower lip and pondered.

"…How many snakes are we talking about?"