strange names / vowels / namine

We had started playing a game of sorts.

days go by

Entertainment was something he came upon very often. As for me, it was a rare treat. It seemed so new to me, but to him, it was a daily activity.

summer ends sometimes i walk right past you

I guess the occasional feelings of wanting to erase everything were natural. After all, I didn't want him to remember anything he did with me. The games.

night fall comes sun sets

But sometimes, it hurt. Those feelings. They made me feel so guilty; it was just too painful. Even if I did have half a heart, it still hurt as if I had a whole.

you hide from me

The first time he came over, we didn't know anything would happen. We didn't think anything would happen. At least, that's what I thought went through his mind.

sometimes i wonder if the gods hate us all

It hurt at times. I mean, it was my first time playing a game. He didn't have a problem; playing games was something he did back home.

Home. I wonder if he liked it there better. After all, his real special person was living there. The real princess. I was just a replacement, created by them.

sometimes i ponder their hatred towards me

When he asked me if I wanted to play, I think he immediately took note of the obvious confusion that captured my facial features. He laughed; one filled with utter innocence, not knowing of the destruction it was causing. But it was to be. Supposedly. I smiled; I don't know if it was genuine. But I smiled, and he was happy.

when you're not here all i feel is nothing

He taught me, knowing it was my first time. He tried to be simple, though I knew anything for him was just simple enough. I again smiled, this time hiding it from him. I was happy that he was trying. Trying for me. Or so he…I…thought.

It was too dangerous.

I knew he couldn't stay too long. They could find him anytime soon, and he could be killed. But of course, being the hero he was, he wouldn't leave until he taught me at least one game. He was always too kind for his own good. I smiled again.

when i can't see you

The game required our hands. It seemed to be a clapping game. He and I would simultaneously let a palm kiss and visa versa. There would be certain parts where a pattern would interchange and start a new game. It was confusing at first, but he helped me through it.

I was grateful. "Eternally".

all i feel is temptation
to run that razor blade

We finished the "clapping game", which he told me was called "Patty Cake" by some girls back home. Home again. The word melted like a candle into my mind, the remaining wax leaving a burning sensation. The word was one I came to hate.

days go by summer ends

We were done with the game. His manyth time and my first. Such differences were apparent but yet the smiled we shared could've been identical twins. The azure gleam in his eyes so lovingly drowned in my own, and I couldn't help but feel a tinge of guilt. He was looking at me in such a way because he thought I was his princess. His princess.

sometimes you walk right past me

I'm not a princess. I'm a witch. He cannot know that, and he will not know that. Because one day it will all end. Everything single moment that he so treasures within his heart will be erased forever, into absolute nothing. All because I have to. I have to.

night fall comes

I can't refuse them. It would only make my heart even less that half. All the meaningless material items I have in that secluded room will instantly dissolve, as if they never existed. Dust will take their place.

The dead while walls that house that gray floor only look at me with pity. They know that the boy they see and protect will one day maim their faces, and I'm the only one who can stop him. It's as if they have eyes of their own. Eyes that are ripping through my half-heart.

the sun melts away the moon dies for nothing

I look at him again. His smile remains on his bright face, and his posture stands tall and heroic. I look away from those topaz blue gems that have the power to tear. I don't want them to destroy what I have. Because I can destroy them.

I look out the window. One of them is standing there.

It's time.

you hide from me

I watch him. His body lays dead cold on the grayscaled tiles. His eyelashes frame his closed eyes, and his lips are slighted parted to form a complete pursed pout. Sometimes, I just can't take it.

Looking at him while he's sleeping seems like a sin. I feel undeserving to witness such a sacred time and moment. After all, I'm not his princess. She is. The real one.

I'm only but a witch.

but i'll find you
and wake you up

from this dream

Are these tears?

and then we'll die again

- Fin.