Treasure These Ancient Feelings:

Story by Vanessa S. Quest

"Hevn, what's the catch? Well? Why are you sending us to a place like that for a job?" Ban continued to converse with the negotiator while fondling her chest.

Ginji watched the two partly interested.

"I told you, it's a simple recovery of a missing chest."

"And what's in the chest? Your clients have to be more forth-coming than that."

"I can't disclose that to uninvolved parties, Ban. But, if you accept the case- that's a different story."

"Fine- what are the risks?"

"Oh, for the Invincible Ban-Midou…"

"Hevn-chan, other groups are after this, too. For different groups, right?"

Hevn blinked then nodded, removing Ban's over-welcomed hands to approach Ginji. "Yes. Shido's been hired by the client as well, but other groups are trying to recover it for themselves."

"Shido, eh? So the Monkey Boy – wait, Hevn. If we succeed, we'd be the only ones paid, right?"

She nodded, "Yes, well, the retrieval fee."

"We're in. Now, what's the loot?"

"Accurately enough, Ban- you'd be recovering—"

"—PIRATE BOOTY!"

"Doubloons. Gold and silver doubloons." Hevn rubber her eye, "Worth 80 million in American dollars."

Ban rung his hands, "And finder's fee?"

"8 Million. American."

Ban grinned, putting a hand around Ginji's shoulder. "We're in!"

"You already said that."

"Yeah, yeah, so where are we headed for?"

"Here's your reservation and room key. It's somewhere on the mountain side. That much has been confirmed. The resort is the only building out there, so meet and greet your competition and avoid the snowline, it's not up there."

"All of last night Ban-chan was trying to find some hot chicks, Shido-kun. He ignored me the whole time." Ginji pouted, his hands muddy and shoes covered in pine needles. "At least we knocked out a huge territory."

"If he's such a jerk why don't you come back?"

"I didn't say that he was. He's just upset that we didn't find it yet."

Shido glowered. "We all can't wait until you come back, you know. You're wanted there, and most of us have either forgiven you or blamed Ban from the beginning."

"Shido-kun…" Ginji turned, "I'm going to find Ban-chan."

As Ginji opened the door he walked right into Ban. Ban glared at Shido then grabbed Ginji's arm with some force. Pulling Ginji back to their room, Ban tossed him onto the bed.

"Itai-tai-tai! Ban-chan! That hurt!"

"Shut up! Why were you with him? Baka were you telling him about the recovery!"

"N… no, Ban-chan that hurt!" Ginji said again, looking for sympathy if not an apology.

"Then what was that about? Huh? You're so buddy-buddy, eh, is Monkey-Boy playing the field? Are you 'with' him now?"

"Ban-chan! Why would you say that! We're friends—aren't we?" The word 'we' was not defined to mean Shido or Ban specifically, but it implied Shido.

"You know what, if you're that friendly with that de-evolved human why don't we just call it quits—get out of here! Go!"

"Ban-chan!"

"I mean it! Let's get rid of the 's' in Get Backers!"

Ginji's eyes froze. "W…what? What do you…"

"They all want you back so much maybe you shouldn't have been gone! Go home, Ginji!"

Ginji backed up to the door, "Do you mean this, Ban-chan?"

"Go home, Ginji!"

Glowing with electricity he ran past Ban, his static electricity crackling as it made contact with Ban's skin. Ginji ran from the hotel, out of the resort and deep into the woods. It didn't matter that it was pitch black, as he ran Raitei's glow buzzed around him, ensuring no living thing would touch Ginji as he went down his dark path.

Just as Ginji ran low on energy, the actual weight of what transpired happened. He slowly continued to walk around, hopelessly lost in the dark woods.

Ban took out a smoke and glared at the door.

So Shido was with Ginji, huh?

Of course, technically, he'd never declared Ginji was his, but come on, wasn't it obvious? Sure he was an idiot, but they had lived together, hadn't that meant anything? But time and again he'd sneak off to that bastard's company. Out of all his no-good 'friends' who didn't even care for him he purposely chose the most obnoxious.

Shido stormed the room. "What the hell was all that about! See Ginji! This is what I mean—he treats you second rate when you were a god to us! Midou where the hell did Ginji go?"

"Out!"

"Why the hell'd he go out now?"

"No, I mean you, get the hell out! You're a home-wrecker! Does Madako even know you're cheating on her? Well?"

"Don't you give me that vindicated look—and what do you mean, did you jagan yourself? Where's Ginji?"

"Stop playing coy! I know you two hooked up behind my back! I hear how he describes his secret love with Kazuki!"

"Where is he?"

"I kicked his ass out for the night, I don't need to deal with you feral beasts! He's probably lost trying to get to your room. For all I care he can stay lost. It's better for him that you bastards can't turn him into Raitei at least!"

"And people think you're a genius? You idiot! Ginji'd never think of any of his four kings like that! He's not even into any of the former Volt's fanclub! If he's into anyone you'd have to know them. Like Himiko or Hevn…"

"Yeah? Not with what his conversations suggested."

"Well maybe he meant someone he saw, as far as we all knew he wasn't official! No one's said yes or asked him."

"Like I'd believe you."

"And why the hell not? If he really liked me do you think he'd still be hanging around you? I'd have moved him back to Mugenjo where he'd be treated right!"

And then, Shido hit the floor.

"You know what, screw this. I'll find Ginji myself, and make him explain, I don't need you spreading rumors about me that might hurt Madako."

Shido banged on Ban's door, he swore under his breath, "Go away! You aren't wanted here!" He muttered, "I just got rid of you a few minutes ago…"

Shido continued to bang on the door. "Ginji's not in the hotel! And he's not on the grounds! What did you really say to him!"

Ban opened the door. "It's not my problem. He's your problem."

Shido threw a punch, Ban caught his fist.

"How can you say that! He's your partner and he's missing!"

"WRONG. He WAS my partner, now he's yours and probably in a different way, too. So you go find him and fuck off, together."

"I can't believe I'm saying this." Shido said to himself, "He went away with you didn't he? He lived in a car with you and starved with you—he might be stupid but no one would go through that much shit just to be friends with a business partner, do they! If he's really so deep in boy-love do you really think it wouldn't be for you! How can someone as egotistical as you not make that assumption? FINE I'LL go look for my friend!"

Ban froze, still latching onto Shido's fist.

"You mean… he liked me back? Shit! Hey, Monkey-Boy do you have any good search animals around?"

"For all we know he could be looking for the treasure to make you forgive him as backwards as he is."

Ginji held his arms around his chest, crying as he forged deeper through the woods. He stopped after stumbling over a rock for a moment to look up at the darkness consuming the sky. Dry, bushy evergreen needles blocked out star and moonlight, but he could tell dawn was still a few hours before coming.

'Maybe he didn't really mean it…'

He looked at his hands. "Than again, maybe he really did. Look at yourself, Ginji, you're a freak, a monster… no wonder he can't trust me."

Ginji's eyes hardened as the soul behind them pounding within his own pools of sorrow as they formed riptides to suck in and drown in.

No longer bothering to watch the ground he blindly wandered for another half an hour before consequence bit him in the ass.

Fat droplets of rain pelted through the tree line and plodded onto him, making him soaking wet within the two minutes the rain lasted.

Screaming, louder on the outside to drown out the inside, he frantically sucked in the lightning as dozens of bolts came down in frenzy to the small area.

The heat from the strike allowed him to throw off his vest as he wandered onto a construction site, after less than 80 paces as lightning guided with every five steps he returned to the tree lines and stumbled into a sink hole.

His last freely made step sank sixteen centimeters, and as the soil went into a chain reaction, the last lightning bolt hit a tree both splintering a branch and shooting sparks.

The branch falling, as Ginji attempted to pull free his foot came with two additional surprises, the weight of the branch and angle, as it landed on Ginji knocked him onto the unsettled soil but not before piercing his stomach. In addendum to the weight pinning Ginji, the excess weight also caused the soil to shift downward, forming a 3 meter dip pulling Ginji down, along for the ride. Upon hitting the hard, semi-settled ground the branch impaled through Ginji's abdomen and into the hard soil under him.

Ginji let out a huff before his eyes flickered shut. He wondered if he had a right to call out for Ban-chan anymore, but dismissed it.

If his arm hadn't been so sore, maybe he could move the branch—he attempted it before realizing that he had, in fact, been impaled.

Wonder between both where he was and why he was there evoked Raitei's attentions.

Ginji continued to feel colder and colder but not for the more physical reasons. Why? Why after all he lost, all he went through, was he even there? Just to be discarded?

Just to be discarded.

Thrown away.

Used up.

No good to anyone anymore. He was sure, once; he was special. Is this how it really was supposed to go? He had to have meant something to his folks, long ago—then he was discarded. People once chose to follow and believe in him… until he was swallowed in so much grief even he didn't think he existed. Hollow. And then, before he could fully be void, be dead, truly, on the inside Ban had come like some wonderful act of redemption and he was happy and alive—then what? This?

Why did Ban even bother if he was just going to do this to him! At least if he stayed in Mugenjo all his sacrifice meant something! Sure he'd be dead inside but his carcass held use! But now?

Now what! He'd die and he'd fail everyone.

The real legacy that Raitei was born from to prevent.

At least as Raitei he could spare the people that he loved.

Ginji wanted to burn. With that fire, redemption, retribution, would come, but even as he pleaded for the sky to keep pouring into him, the winds seemed to ignore the request.

He wanted nothing to do with that weak boy anymore. Laying his head back he reached for the soil wondering if he could climb out and maybe get back Raitei for the people who had lost their hope.

Funny, because Raitei meant abyss and perpetual sorrow to Ginji, but maybe that really was hope. Oblivion, complete obliteration, meant no more pain, and as his eyes replayed Ban go from kind, warm eyes to furious, passionate spiteful eyes that jump of thought seemed reasonable.

He made up his mind not to die here. Here had no use, at least dead inside at Mugenjo did. He'd even get to make the others happy again. He had been selfish.

Palming at the dirt to try to force himself up had a reversing effect. Damn gravity. The soil fell in on him, a small chain reaction sent some sprinkling to the bottom, rounding out some hard edges while creating pockets of it's own in others.

No, he couldn't call Ban, could he? Even though he had finally been given permission to be himself again.

He wondered if Raitei would like that, or hate someone trying to control him. Ginji hated to think. He was bad at it. To feel, supposedly, had been his talent, it was more like to grossly misread bad-sides of people.

Cynics are optimists after hitting rock bottom. If Raitei was that, but Ginji was there, did that mean even Raitei was ignoring his calls now?

Ginji grabbed hold of the branch and pushed up screaming. "GYAAH!" He panted out, near inaudibly, "Make it go away, make me go away, make me go away!"

No one. He had it. Nothing. He owned all it was worth. Emptiness, useless, trash to be discarded. Flammable. Ginji's eyes successfully were now void, as he smiled vacantly. "That's right, I bet that's how they'd throw me out." As he lost his expressive smirk his hair seemed to match Raitei, if, say, he ran out of power. Then again, Raitei never rode on empty.

Shido and Ban growled as they – by they meaning Shido – had gotten word of Ginji's whereabouts from a helpful fox only to be stopped by a member of the hotel staff.

"It is important to stay on the grounds and accounted for. A storm has started a wildfire 25 kilometers away. We have evacuation capability if necessary and the fire marshals are fighting to contain it as we speak."

Ban glared at Shido, "Where did it say he was!"

"Definitely to the West, near that origin point…"

"Shit, then I have little choice, excuse me, excuse me miss, yes, you dear. Look here, my partner and I, we're going to check in then head back to our room, don't disturb us, 'kay?"

She smiled understandingly. After all, two men at an isolated resort in the mountains sharing a room rocket science hardly.

Ban gave Shido a glare, "Oi, any birds or something that can circle in for me?"

Shido nodded. "I'm coming too, of course—"

"—Not. You are going to tell them we're missing in two hours if we're not back. Ginji might be really hurt. It's my fault, my partner, my neck- no complaints from you, now do you have something I can use or not?"

Shido whistled, a species of mountain hawk flew over. "Pay attention- white tale feathers, gold wings, he'll go through and circle Ginji, he'll also give you the least resistant path—but Ban, if Ginji's dead… I'll have a snake-bastard skin belt."

:Like I'd let that happen."

"Hurry up, 2 hours."

Ginji watched upward blankly, reacting to the sky aimlessly. A shroud of smoke had rolled by for a few moments before wind blew it past. His eyes felt too heavy with deeper concerns then to address that.

"No more 's' in Get Backers, hmm?"

He contently watched the sky before a curious, sharp pain made him glance downward. "So I can bleed. That means I still have a heart left. Raitei why are you taking so long to take over? Am I not good enough for you, too?"

Glancing up, Ginji spotted a buzzard. "Huh. So I'll be recycled after all. Damn, poor thing'll get a stomach ache eating trash like me."

Headlights poured straight across but Ginji doubted higher calling of spirits. He closed his eyes to relax, no matter who this rescuer might be he really didn't want to deal with it.

"Ginji!"

His eyes partly opened, looking toward his stomach at first then scanning slowly up to the source.

"Ginji! Baka! Say something!"

He formed a ball of electricity in his hand, shooting past Ban as a warning. "Stay away." His voice was calm, flat, void. Maybe Ban'd think it really was Raitei and leave him alone. He really didn't want to find out Ban only liked him as Raitei, that would be too much of a kick to the balls.

"Come on man, I came all this way—I'm s—"

"STAY AWAY!" This time Ginji intentionally hit him. Why was Ban-chan being the idiot here! He had to hit him hard enough to look like Raitei but not enough to kill him. Oh the balances one keeps.

"Listen, I know you're mad, but not calling for when you're like this?"

Ginji threw up a patch of soil with a rock in it at Ban. "Leave me alone! You said it! Go back home- but I don't have one so here's good enough!"

Ban wiped the muddy soil, finding a doubloon in place of a rock. "Gin- you're amazing. You found them…"

Ginji's heart winced, but that was right. He meant nothing to Ban, so a leap in direction like that… "At least wait 'til I'm dead, dude, I don't want to talk to you right now."

Ban walked away from the hole.

Ginji laughed, tears streaking his face. "So it's that easy…" He muttered.

An unwinding rope hit the ground opposite of him.

"Then get out of the hole. I'm still in the recovery business you know. Some of us have to make a living."

Ginji screamed angrily, throwing his arm at the ropes direction and an electric blast. "No! You threw me away! Just let me rot away! Damn it just let me rot away…" Tears ran down Ginji's face as he used one hand to bat them away.

He swore vehemently inside the Subaru 360.

"Just one minute. Have any good dreams?"

Ginji tried to throw a punch only to find his arm refusing to work.

"Now don't do anything particularly stupid and fry the car, you see, I don't plan on dying in a fire." Ban motioned for an excuse about witches and fires and bad blood in between.

"K'so! Let me out of the car, Ban!"

"Iya."

"You might not want to die but what life do you really think I have left! Are you crossing into torture now! Once we're back to any civilization I'm taking off!"

"I doubt it with you like that, partner."

Ginji visibly winced. "Screw you! We're not partners anymore, remember? You said you wanted to lose the 's' in Get Backers. You TOLD ME TO LEAVE!" Tears streamed down his face, but Raitei's eyes were far removed.

"What, that taste of death dream didn't fill you? Do you really want to die that much Ginji? Himiko told you I've killed before, is that what you want?"

"Right now, kami-sama yes! You left me alone… you promised you wouldn't, I left everything I had and knew. I don't have anything or anyone anymore! Not even Raitei wants me… I… this doesn't matter to you." Ginji's face became heavy as stone. In an act of spite Ban didn't even think Ginji was capable of, Ginji continued. "I'lljust talk to Shido-kun about it."

Bowing his face, Ginji watched the floor refusing to look Ban in the eyes regardless that his 'trump card' evil eye was already spent. He knew the real power in Ban's eyes were not nearly as limited as the three-times-a-day jagan. He caught the feeling of a hand under his chin, fingers clasping around his throat. Closing his eyes, serenely he waited for the suffocating squeeze while letting go of his air. Yes, he could die like this, it would be okay.

Instead of death's embrace he found Ban's lips pressed into his own with a gentle strength Ban meant to pass on to his partner Ginji.

Ginji pinched his eyes closed tightly as tears bled out in a light trickle before a complete halt. "I'm sorry Ginji. For all of it, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you like this, I didn't plan for it to turn out this way, I never would have…"

Ginji turned his face away not wanting to lock stares with Ban, the one person ever in Mugenjo who could stare down the Raitei and actually make 'Raitei' flinch. He continuously exasperated his wound in his own act of rebellion, intent to bleed to death just inside the resort grounds. This was merely Ban mocking him, now. The cruel farce of a love confession coming from the person who Ginji was convinced hated him most, at the time.

"Gin, please- I thought you and Shido… and you know how much I can't stand the guy, and how jealous I get… it's not a good excuse. I never should have said that to you, but I can't go back on my word."

Ginji unbuckled his seatbelt waiting for the hammer to fall, to hurt his heart too much to stand.

"We said forever, Ginji. Forever."

Ginji turned to face Ban for the first time since that car ride. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes but even in that sad state his eyes pierced into Ban's like cold icicles clearly reading: Are 'ya done? He smacked Ban across the face and somehow through stubbornness alone walked the distance to the hotel, clamping his functioning arm around his pierced side.

Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars, Ginji hit the bar in seconds flat before pouring on the heavy liquor. He was stupid, Ban knew that, Shido knew that, Kazu, Hevn, Himiko- everyone knew that. Even Ginji knew there was something grossly wrong with his cognitive capacity, of course in dumbed-down laymens for kids (with mental defect) version.

How could he interpret that? How was he supposed to take hearing something like that?

Ginji watched his hands. Drinking plus massive blood loss equals bad. His face sunk into his arm on the counter.

No home to return to, and Ban sure as hell would begrudge any yen taken away from the gig. 'I found it. I used my jagan, saved your life, was the reason for you finding it and used my car to transport it.' He was poor. He had nothing. Nothing, he was nothing. Why couldn't Ban just leave him in his perfect, free grave!

Ginji tipped over his empty glass, put the money down on the table and sobbed.

Perpetually alone and crying, and always, always empty so why couldn't he just die? They act like he's some savior… oh what he would do to die and just play the martyr today.

He didn't realize he'd fallen into a drunken sleep, nor did he feel Ban and Shido carry him into Ban and his reserved room. The subtleties of a mattress, pillows, and blankets were lost to him, as was the awareness of just how meticulously they bandaged him up, and even slipped him a vitamin cocktail to prevent hangover.

He did, however, recognize, albeit groggily, two people who hated each other even in their sleep bicker over what 'half of the chair' meant as they slept on the hideous thing leaving Ginji the full-sized bed all to himself.

"Ban-chan, Shido-kun…?" The day before temporarily blurred over, Ginji recognized the odd special treatment. With no response he tried again, as loud as his voice permitted. "Ban-chan, Shido-kun?"

Ban's eyes shot open wide, his shades still on his nose he pushed them up and staggering to gain morning legs made his way to Ginji's side.

"Gin! Thank goodness you're awake!" He kneeled at the bedside, forehead touching Ginji's sensitive wound lightly. As Ginji breathed the more pressure from Ban's head was felt.

"Please, please forgive me, Gin. I should've done this a long time ago… Ginji I love you, you're my world, so please forgive me, and even if you can't don't take it out on you." He stroked Ginji's pale cheek, "You're so fragile and beautiful…"

"Of course Ban-chan… but, what's going on…?" Ginji's eyes widened, morning haze tapered off now. He attempted to sit up. Ah, so the strategical genius that is Ban Midou strikes.

"Ban… you… Don't ever do that again to me! Do you know how many ways you actually almost lost me!"

"I know and I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry! It was stupid… I mean really stupid I was jealous of monkey boy and you have way better taste than that… I made a horrible mistake, but, I love you. How can I make this up to you?"

Ginji's eyes could not meet Ban's for a long moment as he looked down at his arm. "I… don't know." His hands laced around Ban, locking his back to Ginji's chest. "I mean really, I'm such an idiot without you." He laid his head down on Ban's shoulder then turned so their cheeks rested against each other, his left, brown eye parallel to his partner's right, blue eye. Eyelashes meeting as Ginji's eyelashes batted and Ban blinked.

Ginji gave Ban a gentle kiss.

"What I do know is forever… and that's good because I can't do that without you. But you owe me big."

"And should apologize to Shido-kun."

"What! No way – not to that jerk—"

"Ban-chan!"

"Okay… okay… anything for you, because I love you."

"Ban-chan, I love you too."

"Did you go Raitei—?"

"Gomen… ITAI! Watch the wound!"

"Baka!"

"You gave me permission, remember!"

Completed 06.01.2006