Title: Speak Silently As You Fall
Summary: His pain is her pain. She catches ahold of his hand and never lets go.
Word Count: 638 (I would've made it longer, but my muse wasn't cooperating.)
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Contains an allusion to sex. Other than that - there's a lot of angst. There's some fluff to balance that out though so...win win! And after you finish the fic I won't blame you at all if you want to kill me. This also has some minor spoilers for DH. And there's a character death or two.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter's not mine - it's all JKR's. The only thing that belongs to me is this fic.
Notes: I wrote this for Ely's Harry/Hermione ficathon, which can be found at anythingbutgrey's livejournal (under the tag h/hr ficathon).
It's for vagabondher and my assignment was this: 1) Fluffy angst. Or angsty fluffy. Something that kind of strikes a balance between the two. Them being happy but also not glossing over the consequences of stuff. 2) Alternate takes on canon moments, or in-between canon moments. 3) People being IN CHARACTER! Not even just H/Hr, but Ron and Ginny and even Cho.
I hope you like this!
And I kinda sorta followed the prompt(s)..does that count?
- - -
The world falls down around her.
She feels nothing when Voldemort announces triumphantly that Harry (oh god Harry) is dead. (A part of her dies.)
-
She's frozen, rooted to the spot.
Completely numb.
She tastes tears on her lips and realizes with a detached sense of disbelief that she's crying.
She can't accept it. He's not dead he's not dead he's not dead. It becomes a mantra. He's only acting. It's a desperate thought, but it gives her hope.
-
She doesn't hear everyone's yells or see their silent tears. Her eyes zero in the prone form that lies before them and she can't think. Can't feel. Can't move.
It all becomes a blur after that. She forgets everything and remembers him.
(When she sees that Harry's alive –) Such a powerful wave of relief and happiness washes over her she's almost light-headed.
She forgets to breathe.
-
It's over. The end.
He survives. And that's all she needs to keep going on.
-
She is the first person to visit him in the hospital wing.
As she watches him sleep serenely, a sharp pang of pain hits her so forcefully she almost gasps.
His pain is her pain. She catches ahold of his hand and never lets go.
-
Once he's awake, she rushes over and hugs him tightly.
He's embarrassed, she knows, yet he doesn't tell her to let go of him.
She feels his heartbeat, steady and strong, against her ear. The sound of his breathing (inhale, exhale) calms her. His skinny arms are awkwardly wrapped around her.
They sit there in silence, holding onto each other. There's no need for words.
She closes her eyes. Only then does she let herself cry. (After keeping herself from breaking for so long, she's surprised she didn't fall apart sooner.)
She's thankful that he's alive. Alive, breathing, next to her.
He starts to say "I'm sorry," his apology muffled into her hair, but she shushes him.
You have nothing to be sorry for, her eyes tell him.
He doesn't say anything more then. He knows that she needs this. That they both need this.
"I'm sorry," he says finally, and she doesn't stop him.
She entwines their fingers together and smiles bravely at him. "It's okay. You're here, now, alive. That's all that's important now."
And he believes her.
-
She holds him when Ginny dies during childbirth.
She is all he's got now.
-
It's hard to tell where she begins (ends) and he ends (begins). They're closer than they were before, if that's possible. They're partners in crime, best friends, kindred spirits.
Slowly, slowly, he starts to laugh more and learns to live again.
(She mends him when he's broken.)
She can't imagine her life without him. Can't imagine herself without him. He's a part of her.
And it's that thought that scares her more than anything.
-
She realizes it before he does.
Neither of them makes the tentative step forward. They can't risk it.
She wonders if this delicate dance they're doing will last forever.
-
In the end, he doesn't tell her.
He shows her.
(She's a part of him too.)
-
He doesn't want to imagine his life without her. Doesn't even want to think about it.
She's here with him. That's more than enough.
-
She wakes up in the hospital wing next to him. Their hands are still entwined together.
It was a dream. Reality slaps her in the face.
She lets out a shuddering breath and looks at his peaceful face, relishing in the little time they have now. Before we get our own tidy happy ending, she thinks glumly.
She kisses his cheek and holds his hand in hers, feeling his pulse beating steadily with hers – like a lifeline.
-
This is how our story ends.