A/N: Hello all. Second go at this. This one is different than my first MMAD. This is one of though stories where I attempt to insert the reasons why a character was acting a certain way. The character of course is Minerva. So the Italics are scenes from Half Blood Prince. The flashback is regular type. Minerva's feeling's in between HBP scenes are regular type as well. Got that?? Hope so, but if not please let me know, and I'll try my best to fix it.

Summary: Ever read HBP and realized Minerva had a bunch of little distractions when they're discussing what happened on the Tower scene? That she seems to be recalling a particular conversation when talking about Severus. I did. MMAD

Disclaimer: I own the plot behind the plot. Anything you recognize as JK's is JK's, you see that how works? All Italicized scenes are taken from "Half Blood Prince, Hard Cover American Edition, Page 615" and on.

--

Who Will Be Loved?

'… and Professor McGonagall entered the ward. Like all the rest, she bore marks of the recent battle: There were grazes on her face and her robes were ripped.

"Molly and Arthur are on their way," she said, the spell of the music was broken: Everyone roused themselves as though coming out of trances, turning again to look at Bill, or else to rub their own eyes, shake their heads. "Harry, what happened? According to Hagrid you were with Professor Dumbledore when he— when it happened. He says Professor Snape was involved in some--"

"Snape killed Dumbledore," said Harry.

She stared at him for a moment-

--Begin Flashback—

"Minerva, to what-" Dumbledore started.

"Don't play games with me Albus Dumbledore" Minerva said sternly.

"You're upset I take it?" He said smiling.

"Don't you smile at me either? Yes, I'm upset. How is it that Severus is aware of your travel destinations and I am not? I am your-" Minerva started.

"Calm Down. Severus was told because I needed him to know. I told you that when the time is right I will tell you all that you want to hear." Dumbledore explained.

"Well that time had better be right now Albus. Imagine my shock when Severus and I were talking and he asked me had you remembered to pack warm clothes for your trip up north? My expression of shock made him realize that I wasn't aware you were going up north. Of course, I had know idea you were going anywhere…"

Minerva stopped as she watched him sigh and take a seat behind his desk. He extended his good arm out, inviting her to take a seat as well. She reluctantly took the seat and stared at him. His eyes weren't twinkling- she hated that. But she would not be led astray from the point of her visit; not this time.

"Well?" she said.

"Do you trust me?" He asked quietly.

"Albus this is not about trust-" Minerva started.

"Quite wrong, actually… This has everything to do with trust." He said interrupting her.

"It can't all be about trust… I… I know it can't…" Minerva said leaving the sentence hanging.

"And why is that?" He said looking at her curiously.

Minerva lowered her face and frowned. A part of her wanted to cry- she was sick of having this conversation. And now, he had to ask why? She forced herself to look him in the eyes. He was obviously waiting for an answer. But Minerva was sure if she spoke right now, she would say something she would regret.

"Did you hear me Minerva?" He asked looking at her with a bit of concern.

"Yes I heard you…" she replied trying to get her emotions in check.

"So, why is it that you think this isn't just about trust?" He said scanning her face.

"Because…" she said before leaving another sentence hanging.

"Yes, well, as fascinating at that answer may be-" He started.

"Because," she interrupted. "I can't believe I have to say this…" she said absent mindedly.

"Have to say what my dear?" He asked.

"Have to say it can't all be about trust, Albus Dumbledore," she said angrily standing up over the desk, shaking her finger in his face. "Because there is no one in this world who trusts you more than me, that's why?"

"Minerva calm your-" he started to say, still sitting.

"No. I will not calm down. I will not relax. And I certainly will not hold back. I was trying to, but why should I? There is no one who trusts you more than I." She continued her rant.

She suddenly reached into the neck of her robes as if feeling for something. A second later, her hand appeared from under them holding a gold chain. Not a spectacular chain, or anything, that wasn't the purpose, otherwise it would be out in the open. No, what was on the chain was the important feature. Hanging from her grasp, on that little gold chain, while still around her neck, was a ring- her ring. The ring he gave her on their wedding day, so many years ago.

"No. I have not forgotten."

Albus said pulling an identical chain from inside his robes, to which a ring hung from it as well. And he knew that there would be no way of this conversation ending well… because he could not tell her all that she wanted to know.

"You haven't? I am finding that hard to believe." She said, tears forming in her eyes.

"I know you are upset, but do not for a second think that I have forgotten the happiest day of my life." He said seriously.

"What do you expect me to think Albus? Then why can't you tell me? Why…" Minerva stopped, as a thought occurred to her. "Unless… you don't trust me…"

Minerva didn't really believe it, but this was a time for re-assurance that her husband hadn't left her out to dry.

"You know that isn't true Minerva. I trust you with my life." He said standing up to look her in the eyes.

"Then wh-" she started again.

"I don't trust my enemies Minerva. Do you not think that as my next in line at Hogwarts they would not expect you to know everything about me? If you were captured…"

This time it was his turn to leave the sentence hanging. Minerva watched him as he closed his eyes behind those half moon spectacles. And she watched as he opened them and he looked unusually grave at the words he had started to say.

"Albus, I understand, but when this war started we all knew there would be chances to take-" Minerva started.

"I will not take any chance with you." He said quickly, a fire blazed in his eyes.

"And so you endanger Severus instead? You trust him, that much." She replied sternly.

"Severus is a spy. Voldermort will not presume him to know of my travels, because if Severus had known, he would have expected him to turn over the locations to his Lord. You, on the other hand, do not have that luxury. If Voldermort were to capture you, there would be no doubt in his mind you knew of my travels, and he would torture you to no end, until you told." Albus explained calmly. "And yes, I have my reasons for trusting him. He has admitted his downfalls, and is working genuinely hard to make up for it," he added.

Minerva took all this in. She knew it made sense. She could even understand his worry. But she needed him to understand her feelings and her worry.

"I understand that Albus. But I need you to understand me. Imagine if something happened to you, and I didn't even have an idea where to look for you, or what to look for? Severus's role is a dangerous one. At any moment he may be available, and then what would I do?" She explained, hoping he finally understood her point of view.

She watched as he blinked a few times and sighed heavily.

"You will wait" He said quietly.

"Wait?" she repeated. "You would expect me to wait? You could be lying in a ditch somewhere dying, and you would expect me in perfect health to wait? It is bad enough that I could do nothing when you appeared with your hand blackened, and you told me not to worry because Severus had taken care of it. And now you would expect me to wait?" she said unbelievingly.

"I expect that you would use any resource available to find me and that would only cause suspicion; possibly jeopardizing all that we have worked to accomplished." He replied calmly, and then added. "What I am asking, however, is that you wait."

To wait, she thought. He wanted her to wait. Minerva wanted to scream, to shout, to cry and to laugh… but eventually she just said-

"Alright Albus"

"I'm sorry I can not say more." He said looking into her eyes.

Minerva just nodded her head in understanding. But she was holding in her frustration as well. And rather than stand there and pretend as if everything was ok, she decided to leave.

"Good Night Albus" she said simply.

No usual good night kiss, no embrace, nothing but a simple goodbye. And she turned away, to head back to her chambers.

"Min, I am truly sorry. I love you too much to let anything happen to you." He said sincerely as she reached his door.

Minerva stopped, and forced herself to face him. She looked at the man she loved. But all she could think about was what she hated. She hated that he felt he had to put his Headmaster duties over their marriage. She hated that they're marriage had to be secret. And as she watched him standing sadly behind his desk, the thing she hated most was that he still didn't have a twinkle in his eyes. This was what he wanted after all.

"I know… But Albus?" she said as tears started forming in her eyes again.

"Yes, Min?' He replied.

"If not me…" she started sadly.

"If not you, what?" He asked curiously.

"If not me, then who will you let love you too much, that they won't let anything happen to you?"

And before he could answer she turned and left his office, tears sliding down her face.

--End Flashback—

In that quick moment Minerva had flashed that moment between them at the beginning of the school year.

'-then swayed alarmingly: Madam Pomfrey, who seemed to have pulled herself together, ran forward, conjuring a chair from thin air, which pushed under McGonagall

"Snape," repeated McGonagall faintly, falling into the chair. "We all wondered… but he trusted… always… Snape… I can't believe it…"

"But Dumbledore swore he was on our side!" whispered Tonks. "I always thought Dumbledore knew something about Snape that we didn't…"

"He always hinted that he had an ironclad reason for trusting Snape," muttered Professor McGonagall, now dabbing ay the corners of her leaking eyes with a tartan-edged handkerchief. "I mean… with Snape's history… of course people were bound to wonder… but Dumbledore told me explicitly that Snape's repentance was absolutely genuine… wouldn't hear a word against him!"

Minerva listened as the conversation continued, but she couldn't help but remember that moment between her and Albus… it was driving her mad…

"This is all my fault," said Professor McGonagall suddenly. She looked disoriented, twisting her handkerchief in her hands. "My fault. I sent Filius to fetch Snape tonight, I actually sent for him to come and help us! If I hadn't alerted Snape to what was going on, he might not have joined forces with the Death Eaters. I don't think he knew they were there before Filius told him, I don't think he knew they were coming."

She ignored Lupin's words of comfort that followed; they would do nothing to sooth her soul. Of course after that conversation between herself Albus he had at least starting alerting her that he would be going, whether the reason was Order business or other, and for how long… but her husband was gone, and she had no idea how it happened.

"I don't know exactly how it happened," said Professor McGonagall distractedly."

She went on to explain the measures they had taken… but all she could think was it wasn't enough. As they all managed to piece together the missing parts, of what transpired, she wanted to break down and cry.

But Molly and Arthur bursting into the hospital wing and she pushed those feelings aside- she could dwell on herself later.

--

Ok, so at first this was the first chapter, then it was the second, and now it's back at the first because it really does fit better here. The whole story is written already, I just have to type it, and whenever I get free time, next part will be up. Expect that to be Sunday-ish.

Oh and did I do good job? I mean, knowing your husband just died would be distracting wouldn't it? And remembering that moment between her and Albus talking about Snape and the reason he gave, seemed fitting I thought. But who knows...

Oh this may be another Trilogy, by the way. Happy Readings. :)