The
Hurley Show
by
Hoogiman
Episode One: Pilot
The picture on the screen is black, with nothing but spots from the projector showing. A black and white movie is played on the tape, with a muffled low quality audio as the backing. The show is on, the old ragtime music plays, the audience claps.
A title shows on the screen, 'The Hurley Show'. An obviously cropped out picture of Hurley with the outlining of the island near his neck shows, as an announcer in the background yells, "Welcome to the Hurley Show!"
A fade-out transition is seen. The audience sees Hurley sitting on a table, picture still black and white, ragtime music still abundant. A scruffy 1920's announcer style voice is heard.
"Eating cookies again, are we?" asks the announcer to Hurley.
Hurley stuffs his face with some cookies, before wolfing them down and giving a big cheesy grin, with a nod accompanying.
"Are you hungry Hurley?" asks the announcer, "I think you are!"
Hurley nods in agreement, with the cheesy grin still shining.
"Maybe you should check the fridge!" says the announcer.
Hurley gets out from his seat, and walks over to the clothing cupboard.
"Hurley, I don't think that's the fridge!" says the announcer.
An obviously overacting Hurley gives a rather false-looking shocked expression.
"But there might still be some food in it!"
Hurley nods with the cheesy grin now showing, then starts eating various items of clothing.
"Oh no, Hurley!" says the announcer, "Your wife Libby is home! She might not be too impressed!"
The same fake shocked expression is seen on Hurley's face.
Libby walks in smiling, but sees Hurley eating her lingerie, and then proceeds to start hitting him repeatedly with an umbrella.
The audience gasps.
In a family friendly, comedic sort of way.
The audience claps.
"I guess that's all for today!" says the announcer, cheerfully.
THE END
I am so, so, sorry.