It's early fall here in Hazzard County, and strange and unusual things is happenin'. Now before you go thinkin' I'm about to dive off into some tale about extra activity at the local haunted house or eerie mists over in the Hazzard cemetery, let me clear thing up. Strange and unusual in Hazzard means thing like havin' the mortgage in on time, havin' a good harvest, or havin' Rosco leave you alone for a day or two. For the Dukes, it just so happened all of those thangs was happenin', and if you know anything about that family, you know none of that stuff usually lasts. Kinda spooky, ain't it?
"Hey fellas!" Daisy sang out, turning from the pot of chili she was stirring on the stove as the men in her family entered the kitchen.
In response, three voices replied 'hey' in unison. The two owners of the younger, tired sounding voices pulled out chairs and sat at the table, rubbing fatigue from their faces while the owner of the optimistic elderly voice removed his hat and hung it on the hook before commencing to rummage through his front pocket.
"Well?" Daisy simply asked. There was no need to add more words to the question.
With a grin, Jesse turned and slapped a small handful of bills and some coins on the table. "Two hundred forty-eight dollars and thirty-nine cents!" He exclaimed in glee.
"Wow!" Daisy exclaimed, hugging her uncle." That's forty-eight more dollars than we expected to get!"
"Don't forget the thirty-nine cents." Luke replied as he stifled a yawn.
"Yeah." Bo nodded. "We earned every penny of that money and it's only fair to acknowledge all of it."
"And thirty-nine cents." Daisy replied after she cleared her throat, giving Bo a good natured hug and a giggle before she turned back to the pot of chili.
"I don't know why you boys is so wore out for, them little square hay bales wadn't all that heavy." Jesse announced as he pulled out a chair and joined them at the table.
"I don't suppose they's all that heavy if you's just movin' one or two of 'em." Luke replied, giving him a sidelong glance.
"Don't sugarcoat it, Luke. If you count the whole day that 's about all he did move. I reckon you and me moved 75, maybe 100 bales each." Bo said it in a teasing manner, but secretly he was somewhat upset. While he and his cousin had sweated through the delivery of the majority of the hay, which had included five trips in which they had loaded the hitch trailer, drove it to Mr. Lewis and unloaded the hay into his barn ('stack it nice and neat boys, ya hear?' he had instructed) Jesse had more or less spent the day in a rocking chair on the front porch, conversing with Mr. Lewis about everything from who had been sick, hospitalized or had died to next years crop forecast.
"I don't seem to recall ya complainin' while you's off on all them different races and I's tendin' to the hay by myself when it came time to plantin' and growin' it." Jesse reminded hm, taking his chair at the table and working with Bo and Luke to slide the crackers, cheddar cheese and sour cream aside for Daisy, who had turned from the stove, pot of chili in hand, and waited for a spot to be cleared in the middle of the table. "Besides, think how good them muscles you two built are gonna look for all them girls you're always chasin' around."
A humorous smile crept up on Bo's face as Daisy took her place at the table. "I have to admit you've got a point there, Uncle Jesse. Of course I don't need no help catchin' girls, but if stacking hay and building muscle with Luke helps his chances any..." He ended with a chuckle as Luke gave him a sidelong glance.
"Oh I don't think it's Luke than needs any luck." Daisy smiled, looking at her older cousin. "Seems things might be getting kind of serious between you and Mary Beth."
"I don't know if I would say serious." Luke responded, although the slight blush and grin that appeared on his face left little doubt to the fact that he was at least infatuated with her.
"You two have been seeing each other practically every other day for three months now." Jesse reminded him, as if he needed reminding. "By your record, I'd be safe to say that it is more than just a a passing fling."
"You can say that again." Bo replied with a chuckle.
"Where do you have room to talk?" Luke asked with an amused grin of his own. "If you were to ever last more than two weeks with a girl we'd consider you practically engaged."
"Engaged is a word you'll never hear in the same sentence with Bo Duke." Bo confirmed.
"Sure, sure." Daisy nodded. "One day, the right girl for you is going to come along, Bo, and she'll have you eating out of her hand."
"Speakin' of eating." Jesse added. "Why don't we go get washed up so we can do just that."
A few minutes after hands had been washed and the prayer had been said (with a special emphasis of thanks on the extra, unexpected windfall of forty-eight dollars and thirty-nine cents). The younger Dukes held their bowls to the chili pot as Jesse ladled out chili for each of them.
"Speaking of Mary Beth, Luke..." Jesse decided to ask after they had all received full bowls that were now adorned with the toppings of their choice "...when are you going to see her again?"
"This evening." Luke simply replied, sliding a sour cream laden spoonful of chili into his mouth.
"This evening? I thought you's wore out."
"Well I am tired." Luke confirmed, after having swallowed the bite. "But I didn't see her yesterday and, well, we sort of got into a routine...seeing each other at least every other day."
"I realize that but couldn't she come over here tonight? She lives so far away, clean over in the next county, and I need you boys up early in the morning. Cyrus Nelson got a couple of horses last week and decided he needs some hay too. You ain't gonna do much good movin' bales if I can't get ya ta quit countin' sheep first."
"I promise I'll be able to work, Uncle Jesse, but I do have to go over there this time. She met me in Hazzard the last two times and when we talked earlier today, she told me that her Pa's truck had broke down and she didn't have a way over here. I promise I'll only be gone for a couple of hours at most."
Jesse sighed. "Well see that it ain't no more than that. I realize the work I'm asking you to do right now is tiring, and I just don't like to see any of you kids any more wore out than you hafta be. Besides, if you keep sneakin' over the county line, it ain't gonna be long before Rosco catches you and you'll be over at the Hazzard jail on probation violation."
"I'll keep that in mind." Luke confirmed as they finished their dinner.
(The next morning...)
"Bo, wake up!"
Bo cringed as the overhead light invaded his eyes and he felt his blanket being flung off of his body. As far as he was concerned, five in the morning seemed to be a torturous time to leave your pillow behind, especially when one was not considered much of a morning person anyway.
When he finally managed slits in his eyelids he looked at the small analog clock and realized that it was 4:45, fifteen minutes before he was even supposed to hear the alarm going off for the first time. He then looked over and noticed that Luke's bed was already made. Good ole' early bird Luke, no matter how wore out he might be. Showoff.
"Get dressed, we're headin' to the jail." Jesse then ordered him.
It was only in that moment that Bo realized exactly who was calling him out of bed a full fifteen minutes early. "To the jail? Why? What's going on?"
"What's goin' on is that we don't have to figure out what to do with that extra forty dollars and thirty-nine cents because Luke's figured it out for us. Let's git over there and see how much of it and the other money we earned yesterday it's gonna take to post bail for him."
Bo stretched, groaned and got out of bed. Moments later, he and Daisy were next to their uncle as he drove his truck into town, stifling yawns and mostly remaining silent as they struggled on the journey to full consciousness.
"Dagnabbit!"
Having dozed off, that statement brought both of the cousins awake a few moments later after Jesse slammed the door of the truck.
"What's wrong, Uncle Jesse?" Daisy asked, rubbing her eyes.
"What's wrong is I've been beating on the door of the jail for five minutes!" Jesse replied as he started the truck and steered toward Boss Hogg's house. "That dang sheriff of ours, how dare he leave Luke in there over nite by himself? What if there had been a fire? Why when that district judge comes back to town I'm going to have a word with him!"
"Calm down Uncle Jesse, I don't know about Rosco and Boss, but I know Enos wouldn't leave him by himself. Maybe he was off where he couldn't hear you...or maybe he had dozed off."
"We'll get to the bottom of this in just a minute." Jesse replied, slamming on the brakes in front of Boss's house, causing Bo and Daisy to have to catch themselves. Moments after he had began to make his way up Boss's walkway, the cousins exited the truck to join him.
After a few minutes of beating on the door and doorbell ringing, a light came on from within the house and, as Daisy peared through the window, she could see Boss...wearing a red and white striped nightgown with a matching night cap, and Lulu, dressed in a housecoat with curlers in her hair, descending the stairs.
After hearing Boss mutter 'I'm coming I'm coming' from the other side, the trio finally heard the door unlock and watched as Boss peered out, first with a look of curiosity, surprise, then annoyance. "Jesse Duke! What in tarnation are you doing waking decent folks up at such an ungodly hour?"
"The only decent folks around here are the ones that ain't wearin' a nightcap!" Jesse exclaimed. "I come over here to ask what kind of a commissioner we have around here that allows his sheriff to leave the jail without a guard?"
Boss snarled. "Jesse I know you, for reasons I can't imagine, usually aren't happy with my work. But considerin' the hour, don't you think your questions can wait until the next county meeting or something? Goodnight!"
Boss started to shut the door but Jesse thrust his boot into the door frame, preventing him from doing so. He then leaned toward the door frame. "J.D., if you think I'm going to wait until some county meeting to find out why you though it was okay to leave my nephew locked up in the county jail overnight unsupervised..."
"Unsupervised? And just when was this supposed to have happened?"
"Just now. I went over to the jail and beat on the door for a solid five minutes and no one answered!"
"Well it just so happens there was a very good reason for that, Jesse." Boss snarled. "The reason than you didn't get an answer was because no one is over there...including that no account nephew of yours!"
Ya know, I don't know who to feel more sorry for...the Dukes, on accounta they don't know where Luke is, or Lulu...on accounta she's gonna hafta start breakfast early. Any of ya'll ever try to turn a dozen decent omelets before 6 a.m.?