Title: Tell Me How You Lived
Summary: Elliot doesn't blame, neither does he regret.
Pairings: None~
Genre: Friendship
Rating: T
Warnings: Uhm. Sadness and mentions of blood and death? And SPOILERS for up to chapter 59, this is the last warning.
Disclaimer: I don't own Pandora Hearts or Elliot or Leo or any of the characters. They are the amazing creations of Mochizuki Jun.
This drabble came to me in a sudden flash of inspiration and I had to write it. So. Here it is. asfksdg this chapter just. Oh my god. ;; E-enjoy.
Tell Me How You Lived
The time just comes when Elliot realises perhaps this end has been set in stone for quite a while.
Not to be pessimistic, and, really, thinking something is set in stone is the complete opposite of what he always likes to believe, but it's just the truth. Perhaps saying it's set in stone is pushing it, but a stone that could have been cracked if given the right opportunity would be a right way to put it, wouldn't it? Except that opportunity hasn't come, and here he is now.
With a contractor seal advanced at least three-fourths and Humpty Dumpty's damages being transferred onto him (there is so much blood already) and being told that there really is no way to save him.
And Vincent asks who he wants to kill him?
Really, he asks Elliot Nightray who he wants to kill him? It's laughable, and he grins as he answers because that's the most stupid question he has ever heard.
And it's just like those moments in books where the characters have their lives flashing before their eyes, something he has always wondered if it really is like that. He figured he would get the answer eventually, everyone dies after all, he just didn't expect it quite this soon. And it is, indeed, very much true. Everything, what he remembered and what he forgot, and as painful as some of it is, some of it is the very opposite.
And everything is a part of him. Everything he has done, everything someone else has done to him… or for him… And he will not let Humpty Dumpty take that from him.
Leo… Leo is the one who made this happen, Elliot isn't going to deny it. Leo is the one who made him an illegal contractor, Leo is the one who made him end up killing his family, it's because of that one move Leo pulled. That one stupid move that in a way technically ruined everything.
But it's also because he tried to protect Leo and the kids. It's also because they decided to help those kids. And one thing led to another and, really, he doesn't think it's anyone's fault.
It just happened.
The only thing he regrets about all this crap is that Leo will blame himself, he's sure of it. He's worried of how Leo will take it, and how Oz will take it (and Oz will blame himself, so hell if Elliot's going to let him be the reason he dies, he's not going to let the damages Oz is giving them be what kills him), and everyone else (his father, Gilbert, Ada he supposes, not so much Vincent but a little) and how they'll all deal with it. But he's especially worried about Leo and he really wishes there was some time to say something but… he'll just have to hope the others take care of the very best friend in his life. That's the only thing he can do.
And he wishes he could do what he and Oz agreed on; change the relationship between Nightrays and Vessalius… But it's fine. With Gilbert, that's just as easy, if that idiot will accept the position he's been given now (he better, goddamnit, because leaving it to Vincent? Ahaha no). He would like to be there to see it, but it's fine.
It ended up this way because he met Leo in the first place, that's fact. But, hell, how could they have known where it would lead? They just couldn't. So wallowing over that is useless. And he just hopes Leo can think the same way, he really, really does. Because that's the truth. He doesn't believe in lies.
Yes, it's because he met Leo.
But he doesn't regret a single thing about it.