Authors Note: Hi! Thanks for clicking! This is either a friendship story or a romantic story, depending on how you read it. I will warn you, there's a bit of touchy feely-ness involved, but it can be platonic if you want it to be. This story picks up where 1.05 left off- Cal figured out that Ria had been abused and that's why she was so passionate about a case they were doing surrounding a historically violent person. He confronted her about it kind of inappropriately and at the end of the episode he went to apologize and say...
"Your abuse is what made you a natural. He made you who you are" Cal stated, looking her straight in the eye. It came as a bit of a surprise to Ria how honest and open and just, compassionate, he was being, but she didn't let it show. No, never. I guess he taught her that too. Read other people's emotions, but don't show your own.
"I'll be sure to thank him" She replied with an edge, the walls around her not even considering letting up.
"What about you?" She asked, putting the ball in his court. It made Ria awfully uncomfortable to be in the center of such personal attention with anyone, let alone Cal Lightman.
"I'm no natural. I studied for years" He replied, his tone even, looking her straight in the eye.
"Why? Became suddenly interested in facial expressions?" She asked honestly. Ria felt as if she was treading on delicate waters; her boss could very easily become annoyed with her questioning and make it about her again, which he frequently did. But she genuinely wanted to know. If he was going to prod into her private past, she was going to prod into his. It was only fair.
"Who was it?" She asked, reading him. It had to be somebody that had hurt him, hurt him so badly that he needed to know when people were lying from then on. Cal flashed her a challenging look, one that spoke volumes to her. There was no way he was going to give up that information, she concluded. Ria didn't even really know why she cared, why she needed to know. But she did.
"Emily's mother? Your ex wife? She cheat on you?" Ria interrogated, the thrill of knowing he could slam his fist down and walk out on her at any moment acting as a fuse.
"You know this is none of your business, Torres" He stated blankly, a surprising lack of anger across his face.
"I know" She replied, just as blank and even. He could walk out. He knew it, she knew it. But he hadn't, not yet at least, and that in itself told Ria she was onto something.
"You really loved her" Ria stated, looking straight at him, not even bothering to make it a question. She knew it. She had figured it out, pieced it together, like she so often did. Part of her felt that jolt of pride that she had become accustomed to feeling whenever she read someone perfectly, but part of her actually felt compassionate towards him and guilty for knowing what he didn't want her to know.
"Why are you asking?" Cal asked, not accusatory or angry, just curious. Ria pursed her lips together, trying to come up with some sort of reason.
"I don't know. You're prodding into my private, personal, history, so why not?" She replied, and he nodded.
"You're lying" He stated, and she groaned inwardly in frustration. Sometimes Cal could tell that she was lying even when she couldn't; a trait she enjoyed about herself but found downright annoying in others.
"There's something else. What is it, Torres?" He asked, that slight edge returning to his voice and demeanor. She felt challenged, but not in the sense that she enjoyed.
"I could ask you the same" She replied evenly, looking him square in the eye.
"You intrigue me. All naturals do. I used to think you were just born seeing everything I've studied for years to see, but I'm realizing that that's not true. In your own way, you earned this knowledge and ability as much or more than I did. I got my heart torn in two and studied for decades; you got beat up and tossed around. I used to envy naturals; I thought that they were safe from what I'd gone through. But now I have no reason to envy you, Ria. You went through more than your fair share of pain to become what you are" He explained. Ria was silenced, her mind reeling. She just didn't know where to start. She was shocked by his honest revelation, and she didn't know what to feel. She was kind of impressed with him and slightly disgusted by the way he compared getting his heart broken with what she had gone through growing up, and then there was the whole way he used her first name and by no means were they on a first name basis. Ria was silenced, her mind reeling.
They sat there, across the desk from each other, silence hanging heavily in between them. Ria tried to process everything in her mind; come up with some sort of answer or response.
"What was it like? When he beat you?" He asked in a whisper. It was so quiet that she might have missed it had she not been so tuned into the silence that had previously encompassed them. She was kind of shocked that he had conjured up the guts to ask her that, and she wasn't sure if she should be offended or intrigued with the question, the latter soon settling inside her.
"You think you want to know what it was like being five, six, eleven, thirteen, sixteen, seventeen, and getting the shit kicked out of me at random? You don't. You don't want to hear the stories about the smashed nose, the black eyes, the scars... you don't want to hear about the time that he told my school nurse that I hurt myself. Just like I don't want to hear about your drunken nights and tears when that woman broke you" Ria explained, her anger bubbling at the surface. Her abuse was something she didn't speak of- ever- to anyone.
"But I do, Ria. I don't want to make you relive your pain, but I am intrigued by you and I do want to know you" He explained, his eyes looking deep into hers. So much so that she was actually forced to believe him. For some reason, Cal Lightman actually wanted to know her and it made no sense.
"Why? You've been getting off on shutting me down every five seconds since the day I started here, and now all of a sudden you care about me and want to know me?" She asked, maybe slightly too harshly, genuinely confused with the revelation.
"I told you, I envied your natural ability, I didn't get you. Now that I got this glimpse of you, who you really are, and it's... you intrigue me, Ria Torres" He explained. She was still kind of surprised at this new level of understanding and compassion Lightman had for her, and she didn't quite know how to react. His hand was moving soothingly, or so she assumed he meant for it to be, on her arm and she was feeling trapped.
"It's really late" She said kind of pathetically, grasping at straws.
"Yeah, it is. You up for a drink?" He asked in reply. She bit her lip quickly and contemplated the offer.
"Drinks are never just drinks" Ria stated. People always had ulterior motives when they mentioned drinks.
"Lets go get drunk and you can tell me what you don't want to tell me and listen to me tell you what you don't want to hear, and hopefully you'll be too drunk to remember it in the morning" He proposed. She laughed slightly at his honesty, but had to appreciate it. She shrugged before nodding and getting up, grabbing her purse, following Lightman out of the office. It's not like she had anything better to do, anyway.
"Where are we going?" Ria asked as they neared the parking garage.
"My place" He replied, grabbing onto her arm and leading her towards his car.
"But how am I supposed to get home? And here tomorrow morning? And why wouldn't we just go to a bar? What makes you think I want to go to your place?" She asked incredulously, taken aback by his previous statement, but doing nothing to break his grip on her arm.
"I'll call you a taxi. Bars are too public and too loud, besides, Emily is with her mother tonight" Cal replied as they approached his car. She didn't completely buy his excuses but slid into the passengers seat in a wordless agreement anyway, and he got in as well, smiling to himself at her lack of complaints.
They were seated on the couch across from each other, a bottle of wine in between them and a glass in each of their hands. Ria was sitting cross legged, her back to the arm of the chair and Cal's legs hung off the side of the couch, him too resting his back against the opposite arm.
"He told the school nurse that you hurt yourself" Cal stated, and she nodded, holding down on her lip in hopes of maintaing some control over the situation. Ria Torres didn't just give herself over to people like this, yet she couldn't help herself.
"They started to notice the marks and the bruises, you know, and I would never say how they were caused. He made up this elaborate scheme about how I was hurting myself and how difficult it was for our whole family and they bought it. The looks that woman gave me when she would check my arms and my legs... she completely believed him. She would ask me how I did it, and sometimes I would just want to scream out 'I didn't'" Ria explained, Cal watching her intently.
"Why didn't you?" He asked. She shrugged.
"I knew it would get worse, if I did. I was afraid of what would happen, and even though he tortured me, he was still my father. By the time I was ready to tell, I had been going along with it for too long, nobody would've believed me" She explained. She noticed how Cal didn't quite seem satisfied with her answer, but was glad when he didn't push it. She wasn't ready to give up more than she had.
"What happened to your nose?" He asked, and she sighed, ready to recount her story.
Ria was just ten years old. She sat in the corner of her closet, the door closed, the light off. She heard him tearing around downstairs; heard the pots and pans flying across the room and the screams that raged on. She cried silently into her hands, praying to avoid detection but unable to hold in her fear. She would be next, she just knew it. She could hear him coming up the stairs, his feet pounding like hopeless drumsticks.
"Ria" He said in a high pitched, sick, masochistic tone. He wasn't angry or loud, but his voice made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. She bit her lip strongly and wiped the tears from her eyes furiously. She heard him come into her room and walk around in pursuit of her.
"Ria, come out here baby girl, daddy has something for you" He stated, and she covered her face furiously as sobs shook her body with fear. He opened the door to her closet and her breath hitched as he flicked the light on. He spotted her hidden in the corner, and cocked his head sideways.
"Ria, there you are. Why are you hiding? Are you scared of me Ria?" He asked, getting more and more angry and frustrated with each passing word, the sick softness disappearing altogether. She forced her tears back and simply shook her head, not moving from her spot.
"Well then why don't you get up and come out so we can talk" He replied, his tone a little more even. She simply nodded, terror filling her body. She lifted her petite frame from the ground and walked with as much confidence as possible out of the closet, past her father. He gripped his hand tightly around her arm and she tried to cover up her flinch, but she saw the micro expression of anger on his face; he had caught it.
"Why are you so scared, Ria?" He asked, angry, backing her against the wall. She couldn't contain herself anymore. She began to panic and sobs began to escape her; she knew it was about to start.
She was completely right. He lifted a hand to her cheek, moving to cup it quickly, pressing his entire body against hers, pinning her strongly to the wall. He moved his hand away just slightly and slapped her hard across the face. More tears poured from her eyes and she tried to contain her screams, but they came falling out when he grabbed her by the wrist and turned her around.
"Why are you hiding from me, you little whore?" He interrogated, his voice angry in her ear. She couldn't reply, the sobs of pain and fear overtaking her. He slammed her body against the wall, and she screamed out in agony. He kept his grip on her wrist strong, deepening already formed bruises and spinning her back around once again.
"You're a useless little shit, I hope you always remember that" He told his petite, innocent, pained and tear struck daughter straight in the eye. Then he took his free hand and punched her face with such force that she flung to the ground and was knocked unconscious, her nose beginning to bleed out all over the carpet.
By the end of the story, Lightman had moved towards Torres and placed a comforting hand on her own, humbled by her story.
"It's just so pathetic, I've been crying over him since I was five and he doesn't deserve it" She stated, sniffling back her tears. Cal rested back against the chair and held Ria's hand firmly in his, the other moving to run up her other arm soothingly.
"It's not pathetic. It's incredible, how you turned out to be this fascinatingly strong and riveting woman. You've had someone calling you a worthless piece of shit before you could even understand what the words meant and here you are, finding out the truth and detecting liars. It's so ironic. He tried to make you believe that you were talentless, but by doing it he gave you the incredible talent you possess today. Even though he doesn't deserve your tears, you deserve to feel the way you do about it. You're allowed to still be upset about it, about having to recount it" Cal explained, rubbing his thumb across her hand and wrist, thinking about how much pain those very wrists had felt at such a young age. Instead of replying Ria simply dropped her head to bury it in his chest.
"Did you ever believe that you deserved it?" Cal asked, finally voicing his concern about the reason she gave for not telling the school nurse, or anyone, really, the truth behind the bruises and scars.
"I truly believed it was my fault until I was fourteen or fifteen. By the time I realized that maybe it wasn't all me, I was too immersed in all of it. I didn't want to make it worse by telling him that I knew he was full of BS" She explained, but Cal still wasn't quite satisfied. He was hesitant to push her further, understanding that the stories he had heard tonight from Ria Torres were stories that very few ears had been granted the opportunity to hear. They simply sat there on the couch, her head against his chest and his hands comforting her. It was vulnerable; the kind of vulnerable that Cal didn't believe he would ever have been exposed to by Ria Torres.
"How much worse could it have gotten?" He asked hesitantly after a minute. She picked her head up from his chest and got up the courage to look him in the eye.
"He never, um, sexually, assaulted me. He told me I was so ugly that nobody would ever want to see me naked, but eventually I realized that he was just not going to go there, and for that I'm still grateful. He took a lot of innocence away from me, but he didn't take my virginity, and all those years it was what I clung to, it was the one thing I felt like I still had rights to on my own body, you know? I was afraid that if I did something to piss him off, that he would have the ammunition to go there. I don't think I would've been able to take it anymore if he did" Ria admitted, lowering her gaze, feeling embarrassed and ashamed and all sorts of emotions she had been spending years avoiding. Cal reached one hand down to run his fingers through her hair, before dipping his head down to place a tender kiss on the top of her head. They sat in silence for a moment before Cal began to recount his own story.
"When I found out that she'd been cheating on me and lying to me, pretty much ever since we'd known each other, I was broken. She was my entire life and it had all been a lie. She didn't really love me, I wasn't really the one for her. I felt like I was nothing and I had nothing without her. I gave her everything I had and she betrayed me. I couldn't believe I had been that stupid, that she had been able to lie to me for that long and I never realized it. The study of micro expressions is what got me out of bed, when I was finally ready. I thought that if I figured out how to detect when people are lying, I would be able to avoid all emotional pain for the rest of my life; not only that, but I'd be able to help other people not have to go through what I went through. So I dedicated my life to studying the science behind facial expressions and lying. It became my life" Cal explained. He was also not one to share his story to just anyone, but he had gotten to a place with Ria where he felt it was almost easy. She had entrusted in him her deepest, darkest stories, and he was going to do the same. Ria picked her head up again and tenderly grabbed a hold of each of his hands, securing them in hers.
"I'm sorry she did that to you. Some people are really sick and senseless; it's only human nature to not want others to live through what we did. We understand our pain like only people who have lived it can. Every time I see a child with scars or bruises I automatically think about the possibility that someone's hurting them, and I just want to run up to them and say 'hey, baby, it's okay, it's not your fault, you don't have to tolerate it'. Just like I'm sure you wish you could tell every guy or girl you see being lied to by their spouse to run" Ria explained, one hand moving to trace their way casually up and down his arm before intertwining their fingers again. Cal watched her fingers ghost across his skin and glanced up at her; her black locks tossed carelessly behind her, her red rimmed eyes and the sensuality of her whole demeanor amazing him.
"You're really beautiful, Ria. You know that, right? You give off this tough girl exterior, which is all sexy and badass, but right now I really am getting a chance to see the more vulnerable and compassionate side of you. This is the side that makes you so startlingly beautiful. You sitting here, slightly puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks, your hair all over the place and you giving your soul over to me, that's so much more than the wit and the sexy smirks. The woman behind Ria Torres is really incredible, and she doesn't get to show herself often enough" Cal explained, moving to run a hand down her face, drying her cheek and cupping it.
"I should get home" Ria responds, dropping her head back onto his chest. He ran a hand down her back and squeezed his other hand in hers before moving out from underneath her.
"Stay" He demanded, and she simply nodded, getting up as well. She followed him into a bedroom, his bedroom, she presumed, and he tossed her a tee shirt before turning around to change. Ria bit back a chuckle after she pulled off her navy button down and her bra and looked at the shirt Cal had tossed her- it was hot pink. She pulled off her slacks and tossed them onto the ground with her other discarded clothing.
"Hot pink, Cal? Really? Why do you even own this?" She asked, getting into the bed and pulling the covers onto herself.
"Whatver, Ri. Just be glad I didn't make you sleep in your work clothes" He replied jokingly, and she smiled in response, getting comfortable in the large, unfamiliar bed.
"Thanks Cal" Ria whispered seriously, a beat later.
"No, thank you, Ria" He replied sincerely, and she smiled childishly to herself, before cuddling into the covers and closing her eyes. The emotional catharsis had exhausted her, and before Ria knew it, she was sound asleep, Cal glancing over at her with a small smile grazing his face.
Authors Note: Hi! Thanks so much for reading! I just started watching Lie to Me (hence the fact that I wrote this post 1.05), and I'm totally in love with Monica Raymund, and that fact was totally irrelevant but it's true. So, yeah, you have no reason to review because chances are I probably won't add to this but it would make me reallly happy so please go for it! :).