Entering and Breaking
Tony really loved this part of his job; picking up McGee always made his day. Just the fact that Gibbs would be mad as hell with McGee because he needed picking up was good, but then there was the added bonus of annoying McGee by messing with his stuff. The whole situation was excellent in Tony's eyes.
Picking the lock to McGee's apartment, Tony's face was the epitome of mischievous joy. As he slowly inched the door open as quietly as possible, Tony suppressed a giggle as he thought to himself 'This will be great.'
The place was just how he remembered it; messy and geeky. Creeping past the high tech computer system, Tony could see McGee punching away the keys on his typewriter through the large bookcase which took up half the room. The bookcase was messy as ever and brimming with books about subjects that made him sleepy just thinking about.
Still having not made a sound, he was past the bookcase divider and able to finally get a proper glimpse at the engrossed federal agent. Delightedly Tony noticed that he was in boxers and a t-shirt.
'Fantastic' Tony thought with an evil smirk on his face. It was always better to catch them unaware and vulnerably undressed.
Tony made it to a foot away from McGee's back before the man stiffened, finally sensing something was different about his environment.
Just before McGee turned around, Tony shouted in his loudest and most jovial voice: "HEY MCGEE!!! What are you doing?"
The man jumped so high in his chair Tony could only imagine the head rush he must have gotten. What was even more priceless was the squeal and sudden terror that flashed across his face. Yep… Tony really loved this part of the job.
When he had calmed down enough to talk, McGee threw his most annoyed glare at DiNozzo before answering, "Do you mind Tony? Haven't you ever heard of knocking or that fact that breaking and entering is against the law?"
"Sure thing probie, but we have a case and Gibbs needs you ASAP so I didn't have time to knock."
"Yeah right…" Somehow McGee didn't look like he quite believed him. "Well just wait here I'll be ready in a second." McGee began walking into an adjacent room when he suddenly realized who he was talking to. "And DON'T touch anything"
"Now am I the kind of person to mess with someone's personal items?" Tony gave McGee his best innocent face (which in reality was far from innocent looking).
McGee's only answer was to throw another glare in Tony's direction before he headed into the bedroom, leaving Tony to inevitably make a mess of his things.
With McGee out of the way, Tony was finally able to look around the room. He started with the much beloved typewriter, reading over the most recent page before becoming bored with what was written.
"So McGeek… how's the story coming?"
Tony only got the one syllabic answer from the bedroom of "fine" but he didn't mind. He was busy adding his own ending to the story. It went along the lines of "And then the whole world was taken over by zombies and they all started eating brains to survive. THE END"
Tony knew McGee wouldn't get so mad at this because it was the second draft of this page from the title on top. That done, Tony moved systematically around the room, touching things and putting them back in different places, looking through books before dumping them on the ground and all the while asking a stream of questions about each random item to McGee.
When he reached the bookcase, Tony hit the treasure trove of mockery. For nearly every item in it, Tony could come up with at least 1 comment to stir McGee up.
When McGee finished getting ready about 5 minutes later, he stood at the doorframe to his bedroom. The room looked like a tornado had gone through it. But then again, one had…. Tornado Tony.
Tony was casually leaning against the bookcase as he looked McGee over before adding
"Well finally… what took you so long?"
McGee just sighed in exasperation before realizing what Tony was actually doing.
"Ah Tony… I wouldn't lean against that if I was you."
"What do you mean Probie, it's perfectly secure" To prove his point Tony began rocking the overly full bookcase.
The problem didn't arise until Tony gave it a powerful pull in his own direction.
McGee saw the bookcase fall as if in slow motion. It had been becoming steadily more unsound, leaning in the one direction since he'd had it installed, and the contraption decided to make Tony its unlucky victim.
Mounds of books, photo frames, circuit boards and other decorations such as ceramic vases and other boxes full of trinkets fell first, closely followed by the massive contraption itself.
McGee could just see Tony's panicked face before he was buried under the rain of items and then the large metal bookcase.
When everything finally settled, McGee could only stare in shock at the disaster zone that had become of his house… that was until he heard a groan of pain from Tony.
Rushing into the mess, McGee quickly evaluated the scene in front of him. He could see one of Tony's legs sticking out the side of the rubble, but he could also tell that the rest of him was trapped under the mass of objects that used to be his study area.
"Tony! Are you alright?" As much as he wanted to be furious at the man, he had to admit he was a bit worried. All he had heard from him was a groan and for Tony, that had to mean something bad was wrong with him.
When he got no reply to his inquiry McGee started to panic.
"Tony, TONY!" …nothing. He had to get Tony out from under there… and quickly.
Moving to the side of the bookcase, he grasped the edge and began trying to lift the whole thing off Tony. McGee didn't get very far lifting it off though; he'd never realized how heavy a metal bookcase really was. Since lifting the whole thing back into position was out of the question, the next best thing was to slide it past Dinozzo and put it back down.
With the plan firmly set McGee lifted the bookcase as far as he could off the ground, grunting with the effort it was taking him. When the bloody thing was high enough he began the process of sliding in to the side past Tony's body which he could just see beneath a pile of books now.
When he began to slide it, the case grated against the floor setting his hearing on edge. Beneath the loud noise McGee almost didn't hear the grunt of pain coming from the pile of rubble.
Finally when he was almost certain the heavy case was beyond Tony's body he dropped it back on the ground with a resounding crash. Panting in short gasps, McGee took a moment to catch his breath before rushing to his stricken colleague's side.
Moving the books and other objects away, McGee finally caught a glimpse of Tony's condition and was shocked to see that it involved lots of blood. When Tony was completely free of the rubble, McGee placed a hand on his cheek, tapping it lightly and trying to bring Tony back into the land of the conscious.
A large gash on his forehead which still oozed blood down Tony's face was the likely culprit for his lapse into unconsciousness.
"Tony! Hey Tony! You have to wake up for me buddy!"
At that, Tony's eyes slowly came apart eliciting another groan from the man. "Who you calling buddy, probie?" Tony's voice was small and weak as was his attempt at a smile.
Looking down his body McGee noticed that Tony's leg was at a very wrong angel, but even more worrying was the piece of mother board sticking out of his midsection. A blossom of bright red blood now stained Tony's Armani shirt around the foreign piece of metal.
"Don't worry Tony, We'll get you some help."
Cursing, McGee stood up moved towards his phone and help. He thought about moving Tony to somewhere more comfortable but knew better then to move someone after sustaining such injuries. Besides, McGee didn't even have a couch to move him too.
Thankfully it didn't take emergency services long to reach the apartment, by which time Gibbs and Ziva had shown up, following Gibbs' gut instinct when the pair had taken too long to arrive.
Ziva was the one to accompany Tony to the hospital and Gibbs and McGee would follow close behind. Tony hadn't looking so hot when they took him out in the ambulance and the paramedics suspected he was bleeding internally on top of everything else.
After watching Tony's stretcher disappear through the doorway, McGee and Gibbs turned to survey the destruction of McGee's home.
About the time McGee decided to never again let Tony in his apartment, Gibbs pointed to a mangled piece of metal among the rubble.
"Hey McGee! Is that your type writer?"