(I wrote this before actually seeing episode 50 and wrote it based on rumors. Here the blonde child of Sora is a boy even though I now know the child is a girl. Rumor had it that Sora divorced Yamato and married Jou so that's what happened here in this fanfic. I also heard that Mimi married Koushirou but now know she didn't but in this fanfic they did marry. No matter how much I wanted to kill myself when I mentioned that, I wrote it.)
Names of the children of the digidestined_
Taichi's son: Taisuke
Yamato's son: Soichiro
Sora's son: Yamaichi
Koushirou's daughter: Komari
Mimi's son: Kairou
Jou's son: Joujirou
Takeru's son: Kitai
Hikari's son: Hikaru
Daisuke's son: Musuke
Iori's daughter: Irina
Ken and Miyako's children: baby_ Hiroshi, daughter_ Myouko, son_ Osuka
~some children are not mentioned in the story but I use their names in future fanfic I write~
***
Strong Tears
Written by Krissy Ishida
Young Irina sat on the living room floor trying to put together simple building blocks. Her dollies were seated around a small table with cookies and a small white and pink tea set. She got tried of playing tea party and wanted to try something different. Being the only child, she was her father's pride and had a lot to toys to keep her busy. She wasn't spoiled by her father but with her lots of toys sometimes she felt alone.
Finish with her creation, she took a step back to take a better look at it. Surprisingly at a young age, she was able to construct an exact model of a horse. She picked up the beautiful pink creation in her hands to show to her father. Iori just arrived from work. Piles of paper were scattered around his desk. His case had to be finish by tomorrow and he was running late.
"Daddy? Look what I made," Irina smiled lifting up the horse for her father to see.
"That's nice, Irina," Iori said never taking his eyes off his papers.
"But, Daddy! You didn't even look at it so how to you know if it is nice. I build it just for you."
Iori put the papers in his hands back on the top of the table. Irina put on a small smile trying to impress her father. Taking the horse in his hands, Iori looked at the small model impressed with the design and details. Irina bit her bottom lip waiting for her father's approval.
"Irina, it's a beautiful horse. Thank you. How did you make it?" Iori asked.
"With the building blocks you bought me," she answered with a big smile on her face.
"Ah, yes. The building blocks you asked me to get for you because Kitai had some."
"Yeah, Kitai showed me how fun it is to build with blocks."
"And I brought them because of your good behavior when I took you to Auntie Miyako to watch you. I'm very proud of you Irina."
"Now can you play with me, Daddy?"
"Not now, Irina, I have a case to finish. When I'm done, maybe we can play. Why don't you go play with your little white bunny? I hope you understand, Irina."
"I understand Daddy. I'll let your work."
"That's my good little girl. I'll take you out for some ice cream later."
Irina grabbed her little white stuffed bunny and hugged it walking down the hallway.
She reached the end of the hallway to a door twice as big as her. Respectfully, she knocked twice before opening the door. She hugged her bunny tighter when she approached her mother's bed. It has been three months since her mother last got out of her bed and walked. She was deadly ill and rested in bed all day. Caring about her mother, Irina always tries to keep as quiet as she could while her mother slept. Recently, Irina began to help around the house with simple chores and tending to her mother's needs. Every night before she went to bed, Irina would pray for her mother to get better.
Frighten, Irina stepped closer to her mother's side hoping she was still breathing. Her mother turn her head towards the little child. Because of her illness, her skin was pale but still looked as beautiful as the day Iori married her. Her lips were a fair light pink, black long hair as black and beautiful as the night, and her cheeks baring a very light rosy color. Remembering a story her father once told her, Irina sometimes referred to her mother as Snow White.
"Irina. It's so nice to see you," her mother whispered barely able to talk.
"Hi, Mama," Irina greeted smiling as her mother touched the side of her face.
"You look so beautiful in that blue dress Grandma bought you."
"I like it a lot."
"Did you remember to tell Grandma that and thank her?"
"Yes, Mama."
"Why so sad?"
"I have nothing to do."
"But you have lots of toys, I'm sure you can find something."
"I have nobody to play with."
"Did you ask your father?"
"Yes but he is busy with another case."
"Well, we can fix that. Your father is always busy and has a serious attitude. Maybe we can cheer him up and making him laugh. What do you think?"
"Can you do that thing you did when I was younger?"
"Tickle your father? Maybe another day when I'm stronger. I have another idea."
Irina's weak mother slowly forced herself up trying not to get up too fast so the blood wouldn't rush from her head making her pass out. She hasn't been up for there months so when Irina saw what her mother was doing she smiled. Reaching into a near by drawer, her mother pulled out two bunny ear headbands. Smiling at her daughter, she placed one of the headbands on Irina's head making her look like a white bunny. Trying to stand up, Irina grabbed her mother's hand helping her up. Walking slowly, Irina didn't mind that she had to walk so slow. She was smiling because for the first time in three months her mother was walking again.
Wondering where Irina disappeared to, Iori looked around the living room trying to find his little daughter. Two figures walked from the shadows of the hallway. Recognizing one of those figures as his daughter, Iori smiled but wasn't sure who was the other person walking to him.
"Iori," Irina's Mom called his name still holding onto Irina's hand and the wall.
"Oh my-" Iori gasped.
"Yes, Iori. It's me."
"Reina? Reina!"
Iori ran up to his wife and hugged her weak body into a warm embrace. He kissed her and held her in his arms.
"How did you get out of bed?" Iori asked still holding his wife.
"Irina helped me," Reina smiled putting the second bunny headband on his head.
"You should be in bed. You are still weak."
"I don't feel weak. I feel very active from Irina's visit and her warm smile."
"I guess my Snow White finally woke up from the spell. I'll call the Jou right away. He would love to hear about this and it's around time for your check up."
"Iori, you can do that later! Right now we have to focus on Irina."
"Why what's wrong with Irina?"
"She has been telling me that she has nothing to do. Now don't you think it's unnatural for a young child to have nothing to do?"
"Since you put it that way."
"Iori, hold me."
Reina's body all of a sudden became very limp. She was so weak she couldn't hold up her own body strength. Iori tighten his grip around her and held her there trying to figure out what happened. Grabbing the phone, Irina began to dial Dr. Kido's number.
Sitting in the lobby, Iori worriedly read through his many papers. Even though he didn't want to work, he had to or else he wouldn't have enough money to feed Irina and take care of her. Irina squeezed her bunny in her arms. She tried her hardest not to cry but a single tear dropped from her eyes. Sitting next to her, Joujirou noticed the tear that fell to the carpet. He has seen many patients enter the hospital to visit his father but he never really thought about them until today.
"Irina, are you okay?" Joujirou asked wrapping his arm around her shoulder trying to calm her down.
"Not really. I'm worried about my mother," Irina said sniffing but still refuse to cry.
"Your mother is in good hands. My father is the best doctor in town. Don't worry. I'm sure she's okay."
"I hope so, Joujirou. I can't even think about what would happen if my Mama, my best friend, leaves me."
"You know it's okay to cry."
"No. I have to stay strong for me, my Mama, and my Daddy."
"You are the bravest little girl I know."
"If you excuse me, Joujirou, I want to sit next to my Daddy."
"Okay."
Irina hopped out of her seat and moved to the seat next to her father. Joujirou also changed seats so he could sit next to her just in case she needs a friend. Irina sniffed again but still no tears fell. Iori noticed this and handed her a tissue. She blew her nose and trashed the tissue in the trash can. Iori placed one arm around her while he used the other arm to hold the paper out in front of him.
Walking out of the room, Jou approached them carrying a clipboard in his hands. He waved his hand signaling Iori to come over. Iori quickly stood up and signaled Irina to stay seated. Irina just squeezed her stuffed bunny and sat patiently with Joujirou seated next to her. Worried, she suspiciously thought of the worse possibilities but tried to focus her mind on something Kitai once told her before, think positive.
The two grown adults approached the waiting child. Having a smile on his face, Jou kneeled in front of Irina so he was talking face to face with her. Irina brushed her hair out of her face and waited to hear the news he had for her.
"Irina, your mother is going to be just fine," Jou stated.
"Then why did she fall down?" Irina asked innocently trying to fulfill her curiosity.
"Her body isn't used to supporting her weight and was weak from lying in a bed for three months."
"What's going to happen?"
"To get her body adjusted, she has to take easy walks, about five minute walks, every thirty minutes. I would like you to have the job of helping your mother remember that."
"Okay. Will she come home?"
"After you father signs some paper, she will be able to come home tonight."
Jou stood up and his cheery smile diminished to a serious expression. Iori followed Jou as they continued to talk about this serious issue.
Joujirou smiled at Irina but she just still sat there hugging her stuffed bunny. There was something hidden in Jou's voice that she couldn't pick out. Good news was coming out from Jou's mouth but a sense of sadness was hidden behind it.
"Irina," Sora called just entering the waiting room with three boys following after her.
"Hello Mrs. Kido," Irina greeted.
"You don't have to call me that. Just call me, Auntie Sora."
"Okay, Auntie Sora."
"Where's your father?"
"He's with Dr. Kido."
"Irina, you don't have to be so formal."
"But that's what my Daddy taught me, Auntie Sora."
"Your father did a good job raising you. I have a hard time trying to get Soichiro to eat his vegetables. You can just call Dr. Kido, Uncle Jou. You can call all of us uncle and aunts."
"Okay, Auntie Sora."
"I'm here to take you home. Are you ready to go?"
"I'm ready."
"We will have a fun day today. Joujirou, do you want to come?"
"Not today. Father is going to show me around the hospital," Joujirou explained walking towards his father's office.
"Okay. See you tonight."
Irina grabbed her bunny and held Sora's hand. Sora just smiled at Irina as more suspicious thoughts fled Irina's mind. Sora's smile didn't seem so cheery. It was a forced smile. Something was going on that she didn't know about that Irina had to find out about.
Seeming a little distant, Kitai began to wonder about Irina. He let go of his younger cousin's hand and pulled Irina's hand away from his aunt. Confused, Irina looked at him but smiled because she enjoyed Kitai's attention.
"Hey, Irina," Kitai smiled at her.
"Hi," she answered.
"You seem a little distant."
"Well, I was just thinking."
"Thinking? Thinking about what?"
"Have you ever noticed that people try to hide things?"
"Is that what you are thinking about?"
"Dr. Kido, er, I mean Uncle Jou, and Auntie Sora seemed to be hiding something behind their smiles."
"Really? I haven't noticed."
"I'm just wondering what could they be hiding."
"Irina, I think you are letting your imagination go wild again. You are a very curious girl, aren't you?"
"I got it from my Daddy."
"You shouldn't look at things negatively. Trying viewing the world through a positive view. That way, you will always be happy."
"Kitai, I never said I wasn't happy."
"Oh?" Kitai reached over and grabbed Irina's bunny out of her arms. "What about now?"
"Give it back!" Irina shouted playfully chasing after him. "Kitai Takaishi! I'm warning you!"
***
Tired from a busy day playing with Kitai, Irina slept peacefully in her bed with her arm wrapped around her stuffed white bunny. Silently slipping into her room, her mother, Reina, walked in to kiss her daughter good night. Hoping not to wake her up, Reina didn't realize that Irina was already awaken by her string movements.
"Mama," Irina mumbled with her eyes half open.
"I'm sorry for waking you up," her mother replied.
"That's okay. Are you going to finish reading Snow White and the Seven Dwarves? Daddy didn't have time to read it to me for a couple of nights."
"I will Irina but not tonight."
"Promise you will finish it?"
"I promise."
"Mama, can you promise never to get sick again?"
"I don't know if I can promise you that but I will promise you that I will keep on fighting to not get sick."
"Then can you promise me that you will never leave me?"
"Irina, dear, I will never leave you. I will always be there for you. What made you think that I'm leaving you?"
"I don't know. In the voices of the other adults, they talk with a hidden tone as if you were going to leave me."
"Irina, you are such a bright and an imaginative young girl. Don't worry. I will be with you as long as you need me."
"Tomorrow can we go to the park with Kitai?"
"How about this? If you go to sleep now, I'll take you to the park with Kitai, treat you guys to some ice cream, and then we can go see that movie you two have been wanting to see."
"That's a great plan," Irina yawned trying to keep her eyes open.
"Good night, Irina. I love you."
"Nite Mama. I love you, too."
Reina quietly walked out and closed the door behind her as Irina dozed off to sleep hugging her trusty stuff bunny.
***
Waking up to a surprise, Irina blinked doubting what she saw.
"Komari?" Irina asked confused hoping she was not dreaming.
"Oh, Irina, you are awake," the red headed girl sitting on the edge of the bed replied.
"It was about time you woke up. We can't watch you sleep the whole day," Kairou hissed leaning against the doorway.
"What are you guys doing here? What time is it? Mama?" Irina shouted.
"I'm sorry, Irina. Your mother had to leave for the hospital and your father had to go to work but don't worry. Your parents put me in charge to watch you," Mimi smiled peeking her head in Irina's room when she heard the shouts.
"We can have tons of fun today," Komari smiled squeezing her own little doll.
"So get dressed and we will be going to the mall," Mimi said disappearing in the kitchen to finish the dish she was cooking.
"Oh, okay," Irina said hopping out of bed.
"I think this dress looks pretty," Komari suggested showing the blue and white dress with a cute little cotton bunny on the front of it.
"Kairou! Get out and close the door!" Irina shouted pointing the way out.
"Why?" he asked trying to act innocent.
"Kairou, just leave please," his sister pleaded.
"Because Kairou I'm going to change my clothes and boys aren't supposed to watch girls change!" Irina shouted throwing a small stuffed bunny at him.
"It's not like I haven't seen anything before," Kairou grinned loving how Irina was boiling mad at him.
"If you don't get out, I'm going to start crying. 1... 2..." Irina smartly smirked preparing herself to cry.
"Okay. Okay. I'm leaving!" Kairou said disappearing behind the door but not before sticking his tongue at Irina.
"And stay out!" Irina shouted slamming her bedroom door.
"I apologize for my brother's behavior. Boys. They are all trouble makers," Komari sighed.
"Not all boys," Irina replied slipping the dress over her head thinking about Kitai.
***
Shocked by the sudden upsetting news, Reina began to weep in her hands as Hikari tried to comfort her by patting her back. Jou removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes trying not to think about reality.
"I promise my daughter a day at the park, ice cream, and a movie," Reina sobbed.
"But if you don't take it easy," Jou warned.
"I know. How am I going to tell this to my husband and Irina?"
"Iori already knows but I think you should tell your daughter about your condition."
"I can't even imagine my little Irina growing up without me."
"Well, that's the truth."
"Please, Jou, is there a cure?" Hikari asked trying to use her optimistic personality to cheer up the depressing atmosphere.
"Not for her advance condition. I'm terribly sorry," Jou explained trying to put it in nice words.
"Reina?" Hikari called her checking to see if she was okay. "I'm here if you need me."
"Thanks, Hikari. I'm okay now. When it's my time, it's my time. I just have to accept it."
Reina still discourage stood up and began to head towards the door. Jou and Hikari quickly stood up trying to stop her.
"What are you doing? Your condition," Jou reminded her trying to help her through her illness.
"I promised my daughter a day at the park," Reina explained turning the doorknob.
"You should take it easy for now. Maybe you can go another day when you are stronger but right now I don't recommend a day at the park."
"I'm sure Mimi is taking good care of Irina right now. Let me drive you home," Hikari suggested holding Reina's left arm helping her out the door.
"Thanks, Hikari. I don't know what I'm going to do without you," Reina sighed finally excepting their help. "But I will fight. I'm not a quitter. I will overcome this illness."
***
"Duck!" Taisuke shouted warning the other kids to duck from his super extreme kick.
Growing up just like his father, Taisuke was an excellent soccer player and mostly invented his own moves usually resulting to an injury. There is one thing he hasn't master yet, playing a controlled and safe soccer game. Scurrying around the field trying not to get hit from the flying soccer ball that seemed to have a mind of its own, the little young children searched for shelter.
"Irina, watch out!" Musuke shouted warning the little girl.
"What?" Irina said turning around.
The soccer ball bounced and flew into the sky finally settling in the grass.
A white stuffed bunny laid on the floor collected dirt from the ground. Holding her face in her hands, Irina kneeled to the ground. Rushing to help her, all her friends crowded around her side.
"Taisuke! Look what you did!" Yamaichi shouted angrily at Taisuke.
"I did say duck!" Taisuke shouted back at him.
Just like their fathers, their friendship was nothing but fighting and arguing. Yamaichi pushed Taisuke and Taisuke reacted by throwing a punch at Yamaichi's head. Cleverly he ducked and tackled Taisuke to the ground. Kitai quickly kneeled to the ground near Irina and slowly removed her hands from her face. Irina ashamed turned her face and tried to hide in her long black hair. A red mark was bright against her yellowish skin. Bravely, she held back all the tears that wanted to fall.
"Irina, are you okay?" Kitai asked giving her an ice pack that he grabbed just for her.
"Yeah," she muttered pressing the cold bag of ice against her cheek.
"I think we should sit down until you feel like playing again."
Like a kind gentleman, Kitai helped Irina to the benches and sat with her to keep her company. Irina just stared off into the sky which immediately made Kitai suspect something was troubling her.
"Irina, what are you thinking about?" Kitai asked.
"How did you know I was thinking about something?" Irina asked looking in his eyes.
"I can just tell. What kind of a best friend would I be if I didn't know?"
"Well, I was just thinking about my Mama. She promised that she would take us to the park."
"I'm sure she will keep her promise."
"How do you know, Kitai? You haven't known my Mama that long enough to be able to read her thoughts like mine."
"I know that she will keep her promises because I know that you are good at keeping your promises."
"Are you hinting at the promise I made?"
"Well..."
"Like I told you before, I will give you a piece of candy when I get some from my Daddy this afternoon when he picks me up."
"Thanks. You're a great friend."
"Your welcome and I would like to thank you."
"Why?"
"For being there for me when I need somebody."
"No problem. That's what I'm here for."
Kitai walked Irina home that afternoon. He wanted to keep a close eye on her after her little accident. She shyly waved good-bye and walked inside her home to find her mother sitting waiting for her.
"Irina. I'm glad that you are home," Reina said hugging her daughter.
"Mama. You broke your promise!" Irina shouted dropping her stuff on the floor.
"I'm sorry, Irina, but..."
"No buts! A promise is a promise! You made a promise and you have to keep it just like Daddy always says!"
"I know, Sweetie. I'll make it up to you. Tomorrow we will go to the park with Kitai. This time I promise that I won't break this promise."
"Okay, Mama."
"Are you still mad at me?"
"No, not anymore. I can't stay angry at you. But Mama, why did you break your promise."
Reina kneeled in front of Irina so she was talking face to face with her. This was something important and shouldn't be ignored. She was always truthful to her daughter so why should she hide her unusually news. They were more like friends then a mother and daughter. Irina's eyes widen and she quickly grabbed her bunny to squeeze as her mother began to tell her what she discovered in the hospital.
"But I want to you to be a big girl about this, okay? I don't want you to treat tomorrow or any day differently. I will always be here for you. Please don't worry," Reina said trying to finish off her explanation.
"Yes, Mama. We will always be together," Irina sighed hugging her mother tightly not wanting to let go.
"Now go to your room and get cleaned up. Dinner is ready and Daddy will be coming home soon."
"Okay, Mama."
Irina grabbed her bunny and walked down towards her room instead of happily skipping down her usual skip. This wasn't such a cheery time. Her mother almost burst into tears while she was explaining her condition. Irina had to give a tissue for her mother to wipe her tears and blow her nose. Her mother was crying, but why isn't she? Why is it just now she found out when her father knew about it earlier? Too many questions. Too many possible answers. She sighed and held her head up straight. Think positive and act like this is just like an ordinary day, she thought to herself trying to stay strong.
***
Skipping merrily through the park, Irina tried her best to keep in a distant lead away from Kitai. Being older than her, he easily caught up. Reina stumbled from behind constantly coughing. Irina could easily hear her poor mother's coughs and decided to stop skipping. Catching up behind her, Kitai also stopped.
"Why did we stop skipping?" Kitai asked trying to read Irina's mind.
"Because my Mama can't keep up," Irina explained pointing to the person lagging behind.
"Oh, okay. Then I guess we should walk."
"Yeah, besides we are in no hurry. Lookie Kitai! A balloon!"
"Balloons?"
"Yeah, come on. I want one. Can you get one of me?"
"Sure, anything for you."
Both young children continue to run ahead. Trying to catch her breath, Reina took a sip from her water bottle. Maybe Jou and Hikari were right when they warned her to take it easy. Oddly, she was having a hard time keeping up with the children and having a harder time breathing.
Bobbing up and down, a blue balloon floated being pushed by the gentle breeze. Memorized by the balloon's movement, Irina giggled and smiled pointing towards the bobbing balloon trapped on a branch of a tree. Kitai jumped reaching his hand out trying to grab it. Toying with him, the balloon rocked backwards not wanting to be caught.
"Kitai!" Irina giggled.
"Hold on. I can reach it. No balloon is going to beat me," Kitai growled as the balloon escaped his reach again.
"Here I'll get it for you," Reina smiled reaching out towards the balloon.
A small breeze blew pushing the balloon out of Reina's reach. Irina and Kitai laughed to themselves as a grown adult looked foolishly trying to reach a simple child's toy.
"Hmmm... This balloon is trickier than I thought. We might have to trap it," Reina suggested.
"Pick me up, Mama," Irina asked reaching out to her mother.
Her mother, with her strong, gentle arms, lifted her little child towards the balloon. Bravely, Irina caught the cunning balloon refusing to stay settled in her hands.
Finally having it in her grip, Irina quickly released the balloon back into the air. Something bothered her, something not quiet right. She could sense it. Dropping her child on the ground, Reina's strength weaken as they both fell to the ground. Kitai bend down on the ground and picked up his weaken friend. Irina wiped a tear from her eye and rubbed the bleeding cut on her knee.
"Irina, are you okay?" Kitai asked very concerned about her safety.
"I'm fine," Irina sighed looking towards her mother. "Mama!"
The fallen adult laid still faced down in the dark green park grass. The chilled wind blew bending the tree forward hiding them from the other families and people in the park. A loud pop was heard high above in the sky believed to be the balloon but to high in the sky to see. The two young children rushed to the fallen adult.
"Mama? Mama, wake up," Irina shouted shaking her mother. "Mama, I don't like this game."
"Mrs. Hida?" Kitai shouted trying to fight back the tears.
"Mama! Wake up! You got me. You win. Mama, stand up now."
"Irina."
"Come on, Mama. We have to take Kitai home. His father will be worried."
"Stop it, Irina! She can't get up!"
Kitai wrapped his arms around Irina and slowly pulled her away from her lifeless mother. The young girl just stared. Why today? Stubborn, Irina struggled trying to get out of Kitai's grip. She laughed and giggled confident that her mother will wake up. She had to wake up. There were many promises she wanted to keep. Believing her mother will keep her promises, Irina quietly laid down beside her mother in the grass. Kitai couldn't bare to see his friend like this so he started running trying to get help, trying to escaped from what just happened. Even with the earlier warnings, nothing could have prepared them for what just happened. They were just young children who were not mature enough to handle the death of a loved one.
***
Tossing a white rose above her mother's grave, no tears dropped from Irina's brown eyes. Everybody sob and cried for their lost but a strong little girl stood gripping her stuffed bunny in her arms. The howl of the chilling wind silenced the sobs of the mourners as they seemed to disappear with the wind. Something felt incomplete. She felt alone. A piece of her was gone forever.
Black clouds engulfed the bright sun as they cried with tears of sadness. Scurrying to keep try, black umbrellas popped up as some people seek shelter under the trees. Irina stood planted in front of her mother's tombstone refusing to move. Drops of rain fell from her face but still no signs of tears. She had to be strong. Her father was a wreck mourning for her mother. If she couldn't turn to her father for help, she had to rely on herself. She had to be strong for her and her father.
Walking to her, Kitai wasn't sure how Irina was going to react to his presence but he had to join her. Walking up behind her, he wrapped his black jacket around her shoulders trying to prevent the rain from falling on Irina's gentle head. She lowered her head not wanting to see him. All she wanted was to be alone. She was afraid she might be weaken by the compassion of others.
"Irina," Kitai said calling her name.
She showed no response and kept as still as an undisturbed rock. Trying to get some kind of response from her, Kitai pulled her close to his body in a comforting hug.
"Irina, talk to me," Kitai tried to get her to talk again.
"What do you want to talk about?" Irina weakly smiled looking up at him.
"Well, I was just wondering how you were feeling."
"I'm feeling fine."
Realizing she was in denial, Kitai brushed her hair with his fingers trying to get her to tell him her true feelings about her mother's death. Irina sighed and pulled away from Kitai's warm arms.
"I'm okay, honestly. Everybody dies, right? Soon we might die. It was just her time to go," Irina sighed backing away from her mother's grave.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"Positive. My father isn't doing so well. If you excuse me, my father needs me."
She skipped off in the puddles towards her father trying to help him in this sad time. Having a feeling that this wasn't healthy for her, Kitai just watched Irina trying to think of a way to get to her.
***
Everything in her room remind her of her mother. Irina frantically tore her room apart. Wallpaper, stuff animals, her tea set, and other toys were flying everywhere. The pink bed sheets were stripped off her bed as she laid silently on her white mattress. She held her stuffed white bunny close to her body cherishing the treasure, the only toy her parents didn't give to her.
"Irina," Iori called knocking at her locked door. "Are you okay? I heard some noises."
"I'm fine!" she shouted.
"Are you sure?"
"GO AWAY!"
"Irina, please."
"I don't want to see you!"
"Okay, if you need me, I'll be in the living room."
Frustrated she threw one of her dress shoes against her bedroom door trying to scare away her father.
Daddy is a mean person. He should have told me of Mama's condition sooner. It's his fault she died! If only he would have told me, I could have helped her but he didn't. They are all against me. They all kept it a secret from me. They all knew about her condition but never bothered to explain it to me. It is as if I'm not important enough to know about my mother. Is it true? I'm not important to them?
Nobody understands how I feel. I'm alone now. Mama, why did you have to leave me? You were the only one who cared about me. Daddy doesn't love me. He loves his job more than me. My friends. What friends? They are only my friends because you were friends with their parents. Come back, Mama. I need you to come back to me. Or am I not important enough for you? That's probably it. You didn't love me enough to stay with me. If you loved me, you would have kept your promises instead of breaking them. I hate you! I hate everybody!!
Feeling hurt and the loneliness of her mother not being there, her mind started to wonder off twisting reality to what into what it really wasn't. Her mind and spirit became bruised. She was always behaving and obeying the rules so her mother would be proud of her but her mother wasn't there anymore. She was gone.
What's the use of being prefect? Nobody is proud of me. Irina, admit it. She's gone and never coming back. You are alone now. You have to protect yourself because nobody loves you enough to take care of you.
With new thoughts planted in her mind, there was only one thing her mind was set on. Escaping. She didn't want to feel hurt anymore. All she wanted was to feel loved, to feel the love of her departed mother. The world didn't seem so cheerful and happy without her.
Leaping out of her window, carrying only her stuffed bunny, Irina ran. She didn't know where she was going. She just knew she wanted to go, leave her past behind, leave the ones that didn't love her. Her feet guided her just taking her anywhere but a small voice in her head begged her to run back, run back home.
Worrying about his friend, Kitai sat on the front steps of his apartment and started kicking a small rock. Takeru noticed his son sitting alone to himself and decided to join him.
"Kitai, just tell me if something is bothering you," Takeru said.
"It's Irina," Kitai muttered.
"What about Irina?"
"In the park, she was laughing and having fun. When... when..."
"I don't have to say her name."
"When she died, Irina became very worried and kept saying she was going to wake up again. During the funeral, she was cheery again but now she just keeps to herself. I don't think that's healthy, is it?"
"She is just going through some tough times. I think she needs you as a friend right now."
"But that's the problem. She keeps pushing me away. Just yesterday she started shouting and screaming at everybody. She didn't show up at school today."
"No matter how tough it is, I want you to stay by her side and be her friend."
"Yeah, you're right."
"Is that Irina?" Takeru asked looking cross the street from them.
"What?" Kitai asked surprised.
Both Takaishi's turned their attention to the girl running towards them. Kitai ran towards her and threw his arms around her as she began crying. Takeru rushed in the house to make a phone call to her father.
"Kitai," Irina cried making his shirt wet with tears.
"I'm here Irina," Kitai said holding her close to him. "Now tell me what's wrong."
"I don't know. I don't know. I just feel very alone right now."
"You don't have to feel alone any more. I'm here."
"You don't understand. I'm alone! Mama is gone! There's nobody to love me anymore!"
"Irina?"
"Why am I telling you this? I'm just making myself feel worse."
"Irina, if nobody loves you anymore, why do you think you father took care of you since you were a little child?"
"He did it because he knew it was the right thing to do."
"What makes you think he doesn't love you?"
"This whole week he has been bottled up in his library working. He loves his work more than me! Mama! I want my Mama back!"
"He just needs time alone. He will be back to normal."
"Normal? Nothing will be normal anymore! Can't you see everything changed! It will never be the same without my mother."
"Irina, I think I should take you home."
"No! I don't want to go back! That's where it all started. That's where my Mama first got sick. I never want to see that place ever again. It reminds me too much of my mother."
"But your father would be very worried that you aren't home."
"I don't care. He doesn't love me. Nobody does!"
"I do."
"Kitai?"
"Your my friend. How can I not love you?"
"Well..."
"Are you willing to go home to work things out with your father now?"
"I guess so."
"That a girl. I'm sure my father is willing to drive you. Come inside and wash those tears off your face."
***
Ashamed from disobeying her father, Irina looked down at the ground as her father discussed with Takeru what happened. Kitai stood by her side and wrapped his arm around her shoulder sensing her unstable state. Her eyes watered up as a natural reaction when she gets in trouble but no tears fell. This is a time to be tough so she will be able to explain to her father her mistakes.
"Thanks, Takeru, for taking her home," Iori sighed leading Takeru towards the door.
"Happy to help. You know, Iori, if you need me," Takeru suggested.
"Yeah. I'll contact you."
"Just be careful. If I really know you, Iori, I can predict that you might do something similar to Irina, like father like daughter."
"Takeru..."
"Just joking. I think it would be a good idea for Kitai to stay for a while, if you don't mind."
"Not at all. Kitai is always welcomed in this home."
"See you later."
Takeru disappeared into his car driving away down the street to his house. The two children shyly stepped into the house as Kitai held young Irina's hand giving her courage. She squeezed her stuffed bunny in her left arm frighten about her father's reaction.
Offering two seats for the children, Iori kept a grim expression. Irina and Kitai both took their seats as Iori pulled up his chair in front of them.
"Daddy," Irina muttered wishing she never left in the first place.
"I'm very disappointed in you," Iori said looking into his daughter's eyes.
"I know, Daddy. I'm very sorry."
"I know you are sorry but I'm confuse. Why did you do it?"
"Didn't Mr. Takaishi tell you?"
"He gave me a rough summary and a couple of details but I want to hear the whole story from you."
"I ran away because I just wanted to escape."
"From what?"
"You."
"Me?"
"How can I trust you if you didn't tell me what was wrong with Mama in the first place? You just kept it to yourself! You never told me! I wanted to know! But it's too late. She's already gone! You killed her by not telling me in advance!"
"Irina."
"She was supposed to be better. You said in three months she would be better. Just a month ago, she started walking again, being normal again. But now... but now she's gone. She was getting better. One night I heard you talking to her about her dream to be able to take care of herself on her own and be able to be a mother to me again. For the first time, she was really being a mother to me and a friend but she passed away before I could ever tell her. She probably died never realizing it."
"I think she knew."
"Huh?"
"I begged her to stay at home the day she passed away. Your mother refused even if it meant death. She simply replied that she is ready to die if her time was today or even far off into the future because she was happy, happy to see you. I know you are upset right now but what would you have done if I told you earlier?"
"I would have..."
"You would have tried your hardest to find the best doctor in Tokyo but I already tried that. Doctor after doctor, they all gave me the same results. She wasn't going to last that long even if I told you."
"What were the results?"
"Your mother had a brain tumor."
"But I thought that was taken out months ago. That's why she was still trying to recover those three months ago."
"The operation didn't go as smoothly as we all thought. The tumor spread. If she was to have another operation, she would have less than half of her brain. There was nothing we could do but wait until that day where she would be relieved from her pain and suffering."
"So she was looking forward to..."
Iori nodded his head as a reply. Her small eyes began to water up as she and her father talked about this delicate situation. She wasn't the only one trying to be strong. Lowering his head, Iori tried not to show his tears to his daughter. He didn't want to upset her more. Kitai sensed and felt the sorrow in the room. He gave his friend a comforting hug trying hard not to cry. Shaking her head, Irina tried to shake away the tears wanting to fall but felt courage from her friend.
"Now do you still hate me?" Iori asked his young daughter trying to drop the delicate topic.
"No. I was just upset that you stayed in your library," she answered.
"People need to be alone, Irina, just like how you needed to be alone."
"Daddy!"
Irina rushed into her father's arms crying from all the sad emotions that were bottled up inside of her. Her father patted her back and hugged her trying to stop her tears. Thinking about his daughter, he didn't realize that tears were falling from his eyes.
"Foolish me," Irina hissed into his father's shirt.
"Foolish you?" Iori asked shocked by his daughter's statement.
"Crying makes a person weak."
"Irina, don't think like that. It's normal to cry."
"But sometimes it makes you weak."
"Tears can also be a sign that a person is strong."
"Daddy?"
"When I was younger I learned that keeping your emotions bottled up inside of you makes you vulnerable to darkness, releasing your emotions takes strength and sometimes tears come with those emotions. It is okay to cry."
"Irina, if you ever need a friend, I will be here for you," Kitai reminded her handing her stuffed bunny that he once gave to her as a birthday present.
"Thank you, Kitai. Thank you, Daddy," Irina said having difficulty because of her crying.
"We can make it together through this difficulty. Your mother would be proud of us," Iori whispered noticing his daughter was now fast asleep in his arms. "I'm proud of you."
//..The End..\\