Here I stand on the slightly slanting floor, the silver buttons on my blue jacket twinkling in the dim light cast by the lamps. A slight creaking as footsteps clatter overhead. Shouts can be heard over the gusting wind, growing slightly frightened and high pitched. A loud crack and a splash, shouts stop, turn to screams. The dark brown floorboards are glistening; a very small puddle is forming as the water leaks through a gap in the ceiling.
The smell of salt water is becoming stronger, I inhaled deeply. Letting the smell carry my mind to a beautiful beach. The walls of the cabin were replaced with blue skies and sandcastles.
The door was smashed open and I am wrenched back to reality. It turn to see a ghostly pale figure standing slightly hunched, with fear or cold? Their voice sounded far away and strangely echoed. I catch the words lifebelt, sir and save yourself. I turn away from the figure, my feet squelching as I make my way across the floorboards to the window.
I hear the man move towards me, his boots hitting the floor unnecessarily loud. I hold my hand up to halt him; I utter a single word, leave. I hear his hesitation, so I speak again, ordering him to leave. He mutters goodbye sir and good luck as he pulls the door shut.
I laugh, the word sir has never been so amusing. My father had wanted me to marry into a rich family but I couldn't stand dry land. The feel of the wind on my face, the smell of the salty mysterious depths, the gentle rock of the boat, so tempting, like a drug. I ran away to join the navy, my mother died of shock of course. Father moved to Australia with my sister, looking for a fresh start.
Reaching up I remove my hat and pull the pin out. My waist length mahogany hair falls down my back. The word sir couldn't have been further from the truth. Rejected by the navy because I was female was a devastating blow. The sea was all I had left, all I wanted. So I disguised myself as a man, leaving the inappropriate dresses behind with a smile.
My supervisors insisted I had a natural talent, so I ascended through the ranks faster than my fellows. I had only captained a ship twice before, but I was the only sailor willing to take on such a challenge with this vessel.
I stride to the door and pull the bolts across, the screams of fear growing louder and louder as chaos and pandemonium reign. I glance around the steering room, I take in everything from the smooth oak steering wheel that was spinning gently as the waves crashed against the ship, to the candles burning gently in the lamps on the wall.
I move across the floorboards, which are now covered in several inches of sea water, to hold the wheel still. I trace my slender fingers over the patterns in the wood. Cool and smooth like the surface of the sea on my last voyage. Perfect in comparison to the waves today. Now lapping over the deck above, slowly trickling through the gaps, adding to the rising water. It was biting at my skin, as it reached my knees. The creaking of the ship is growing louder, as more water builds the pressure on the somewhat weak wood.
The little cabin won't hold up to the strain much longer. Even if I had the strength to pull my feet off the floorboards, I wouldn't escape. My brain was yelling go but my heart was screaming stay. The blood was beating in my ears, my heart in my mouth, butterflies in my stomach. My father and sister would never know how far I had got, never be proud of me. My crewmates would never know I had been living in disguise all this time. My headstone wouldn't read Sarah Jones, but Captain John Smith. The ceiling cracked spilling ice cold seawater into the cabin, this was it, the end, goodbye.