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iLoveYOu

Chapter One: One Night to Be Confused

By Romanticfor3ver

Inspired by: Jose Gonzalez: Heartbeats

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My feelings for him aren't natural. They are too strong and too emotional. They give me nightmares about what he really is and how he acts around me.

He ignores me and says mean things to me. I get annoyed and don't pay attention to him for a few days. We meet up with each other in the hallways of Cross Academy and talk to each other. He tells me that it wasn't his fault that he said all those things. He says that it was the fault of his friends that didn't want him to be with me. He says that he loves me.

I don't know how to react and instead of embracing it I run away from him to my closest friend. She tells me that I should follow my heart and listen to it. She tells me that my heart belongs to feelings for love and nothing else. She tells me, 'If you are the person that he loves and you feel the same way; you should tell him that you do love him. You shouldn't be hiding it, idiot.'

Things don't turn out the way that I thought that they would and I end up learning of the missing past that I had been longing for. 'Vampire,' he calls me, 'do you know what of your past?' I do not believe what I am remembering but I am forced to protect this person that I love so much from a person of a kind heart but have been inflicted with evil spirit.

I call out at this other person, 'he isn't your enemy, Zero. There isn't an enemy because this person...' I hug Kaname, 'this person...he is the person that...he is the person that is my brother.' I finally spit out the words but then I don't realize until minutes later when we are leaving Cross Academy what it means.

We are fighting against our uncle, Rido who has been trying to find and kill me for the past years since our parents had died. I realize that this is the person that Kaname has been trying to protect me from since birth. I remember the room with no windows and only a door; at the bottom of the house.

We succeed in fighting Rido because of a bargain that Kaname had made with Zero long ago.

There is something that is still unresolved though; feelings that Zero has regarding my leave. We meet each other on the balcony of the clock tower that I remembered. Zero tells me that he doesn't want to see me but I don't think that it is what he really means. Relating back to the evidence that Yori had said I realize that a while back he had been trying to show me that he loved me. I ask him, 'do you love me?'

He replies, 'how could I love a monster?' He contradicts his word and hugs me, whispering to me softly in my ear while I notice that Kaname is waiting for me at the fountain, 'not if you could show me that you aren't a monster.' I tell him that I can't do it. I look up into his anger filled violet-grey eyes that are urging me to show that I am really the monster. I realize that I can't have it both ways. I cannot have two men that I love in my life. I have to choose.

I can't though; that choice has already been made by parents. I chose Kaname. I bite him on the neck and drink his blood; I cannot show that I am not the monster that he says that I am and the monster that he despises. He blood tastes sweet but sickly. I know what he is turning into. That other monster that had been lurking in my dark dreams.

In the end we leave before anything more can be done between Zero and me. That wasn't the end of it though...I knew that there would definitely be more drama involved than this that I had experienced. Kaname and me are walking hand in hand through the demolished Cross Academy Gates from the battle with Rido but I don't understand the reason that we had to leave nor where we are going after this terrible battle where I parted with many people that I loved.

No. This wasn't the end.

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I wrapped my arms around him as we paused in his room to rest on the bed. It has definitely been a long day of travel. 'I love you.' He whispers it in my ear but for some reason I don't feel anything anymore. I wonder what this feeling is and then I realize. It's definitely just weariness from the journey. It's nothing more than that. I definitely love Kaname too. No doubt about that.

Our hearts are beating together. I can hear it as I fall asleep just listening to his chest. It reminds me of the sea; the rocking of the ocean waves. Back and forth. Back and forth. It soothes me as we lie there being close to each other. It's all that I need at the moment. There is nothing that I want more and there is nothing that I need more. We could just be with each other forever and I wouldn't be bored; ever.

A knock on the door interrupts the calm silence and we both jump up to answer it. Aidou is standing at the door and I turn to Kaname to find what his answer to this sudden intrusion would be. He closes the door and tells Aidou, 'Yuki and I would like to be alone at the moment. I want to get to know the person that I love but haven't been able to be close to.' I ask him whether it is true; what he said but he only carries me by the waist back to his bedroom and lays me down on one side while he goes to the other. In the middle he reaches his hand over to touch mine. He faces me and I face him. We don't know what to do but our lips meet each other. It is the same with our hands.

I don't know why but being with this person makes me immensely happy. It makes me feel as though the sun is shining on me alone. It makes me feel magical. It is a simple treat that he and I are able to enjoy ourselves. I wake up at another time. It is morning but he isn't there lying next to me. Instead; there is a note and a rose that is stinging my hand.

Love is simple,

Love is you and me,

Love is something that gives me joy to reminisce about,

Love is forever you and me.

I was almost moved to tears that he had written something that he knew that I would enjoy and that I would treasure. The love that was between us in my description would be the simple love that he describes; it would be just us; it would be a joy to reminisce about and it is forever.

Forever...it's a word that has resinated with me today; I don't know why- it's just there in my mind. Forever is a long time. Forever is a hard decision to make. Forever isn't forever when you think about it. There was something that forever meant though; I could think about him forever. Forever between Kaname and I was forever though; it was eternity that I would spend with him.

For the moment though he wasn't there for me. I missed his voice. I missed the feeling of his hand touching mine and I missed the reasons that we had spent an entire night just staring at each other and saying nothing. That seemed to be our way of getting to know each other.

It was only a night ago that we confessed to each other but...

...it was our own kind of magic. We are in love.

END OF CHAPTER ONE

I hoped that you liked it; please review because I would definitely like to know that you think about it.