A Decade and Forever
Summary: It all started when...
Disclaimer: Baymax healed me when i got sad because I realized I can never make Kamikoto canon because I don't own it.
A/N: 03/02/15 - Minor edits done
–
You were 16 and she was 14 when you had your first memory of her. She was a little arrogant and a lot violent, but she was nice. She, a Tokiwadai ojou-sama, helped you, a high school idiot, get your money back from the wretched broken vending machine. Given, the way she did it was illegal but it was the thought that counted.
You then saved her life, and as well as her little Sisters, when you found out about the experiments. Sure, you were beaten up badly and had to be hospitalized for a few days but recalling her hopeless crying face tore through your gut. You never wanted to see her like that again.
It felt like breathing fresh air after a long dive; your chest felt light and the world seemed like a much brighter place than before.
"But still… it's my fault that so many of them were…" she trailed off, her gaze turning unfocused as memories of her lost Sisters came to her mind.
You saw her grip tighten around the bag of cookies, and you averted your eyes in favour of looking out the window. It was that face again. "If you hadn't given them access to your DNA map," you said, "the Sisters would never have been born. There was a lot wrong with those experiments, but the fact that the Sisters were born is something you should be proud of. If they hadn't been born, then they'd never have known happiness or pain." You looked back at her, smiling lightly when you finish your words, "And I'm sure that they don't want to see you so down over it."
You were a little disappointed to find that your words didn't seem to do much, only let her think and maybe help a little in making her forgive herself.
She shook her head, smiling lightly before saying, "I don't completely agree with that but… thanks," she glanced at you and you met her gaze, "It makes me feel a bit better. Right now, all I can do is help them get through the rest of their lives; be an Onee-sama to them."
"It would be a lot of work," you agreed, "but I know you can do it. You'll be a great Onee-sama, but if you ever need help, you can always tell me."
"And get you beaten up like this again?" she asked skeptically, eying you as you laid on your bed, "Sorry, but I'd rather not carry the guilt of nearly getting you killed more than once, especially if you're gonna be this ungrateful whenever I buy you expensive cookies." She said, walking around the bed and towards the window.
You almost gaped at her, "I didn't—!"
"But you're right," she cut your protest off, gazing out the window with a wistful yet determined smile on her face, "It'll be a lot of work. This is just the beginning of their lives, and I'll do anything I can to give them the life they deserve."
At that moment, you thought you had never seen a stronger girl than her.
–
It was only several days after getting out of the hospital from the whole Sisters fiasco when you realized the third strongest Level 5 in Academy City was special to you.
You were minding your own business, complaining to your two supposedly best friends for kidnapping you to hang out when you had so much homework to do. You didn't even realize you were walking in front of the Tokiwadai dormitory when she suddenly tackled you and then dragged you off somewhere for a fake date.
At first, you thought it was bothersome but at least she seemed to be better company than your pervert friends. Her help had been greatly welcomed as well. She finished one subject's worth of homework before she declared herself thirsty and offered to buy the two of you some drinks. It was then that you met Unabara Mitsuki, a guy who had claimed to have feelings for her.
He was nice enough, you decided, because even when you were a potential threat to him when it came to Mikoto, he still helped you with your homework. And anyone who could so honestly tell somebody how much he loves a person was sincere enough. His feelings were genuine, you were convinced, even after you found out he wasn't really Unabara Mitsuki—especially after you found that he was fake.
"Can I ask you to protect her?" He had asked, "No matter where, no matter when, no matter who your opponent is, no matter how many times as long as something like this happens, you have to be a hero and go to her side to protect her." You met his eyes, and even in his injured state—a result that both of you knew was Mikoto's choice—he managed to smile whilst he requested, "Can you promise me this?"
You promised that you would protect Misaka Mikoto and the world around her. What else could you say to someone like him? Especially since even without his request, you would've done so in a heartbeat.
But his admission had made you wary. There was a knot in your gut that made you feel threatened by his feelings for the 3rd strongest Level 5. And when you met up with her again after your fight, with her cheeks bright red as she asked if you were okay, you realized you felt different about her.
It was like if there was a long list of names of the people you knew, you'd stop and stare at her name for a long moment, and possibly smile a little whilst thinking about the last time you saw her.
That same night, after Index was saved from that kidnapper, you laid in your tub, trying to figure out why she was so different from others.
–
–
–
You were 17, she was 15, and it was New Year's Eve when you realized you liked her.
It was a party held by a Tokiwadai Dorm, the one where she lived. Komoe-sensei was apparently a good friend of the Dorm Mistress, so you and the other students in your class were invited.
Due to your hopefully subtle efforts, she had become a bigger part of your life. She was no longer just a simple acquaintance like how you were almost two years ago, but a close friend who knew you inside and out. You no longer needed an excuse to spend time with her, and it was such a great achievement for you.
She had performed a violin solo for the occasion, something that you had watched her practice before. It was something that you were silently proud of. She didn't like having someone else listen when she practiced, but for some reason, you had the privilege to do so.
The first time you watched her practice was for some kind of recital. You didn't particularly understand why she had needed to go through with it when she had been so reluctant to, but she had always been a diligent student so she did.
She had been practicing in a secluded place in the park near sunset when you stumbled upon her. You had actually messaged her to meet with you nearby, but she had failed to reply. In the end, while attempting to contact her through her phone, you heard a beautiful melody.
It was late so the area was almost deserted. You had been a little curious of the sound and had began searching around to find the source.
When you stumbled upon her, she was bathed with the orange glow of the setting sun, its rays framing her silhouette in an angelic manner as she held her violin with such a peaceful expression on her face. It had taken your breath away, and due to the daze you had been in, she had caught you watching her, resulting to another one of those Biribiri moments of hers.
Later, when you two had decided to head home, you asked if you could watch her practice again, and to your surprise, with plenty of blushing and stuttering, she had said yes.
Now, you watched her as she performed the beautiful piece she had prepared. She would never tell anyone else but she had been so nervous before the performance, and she had almost freaked out when she saw the sheer mass of crowd attending the party.
You vaguely remembered something like this happening before and decided to make her flustered and possibly anger her—at he expense of your own well-being.
You had complimented her about her dress first. It was red, and it flowed down in waves below her knees. There were black frills and a small bow along the bodice, and it was held in place by thin straps that hung around her neck.
She was absolutely stunning, no jokes, no teasing. And the very first thing that came to your mind when you saw her was 'beautiful'.
She had gotten flustered at your words and became almost shy as she tried to thank you. But then, you commented about how she didn't seem to fill the whole dress up and suddenly your life was in danger.
Your plan had worked though, and you were just happy to see her perform on that stage where she shined the brightest.
"That was rude, you know." She told you after the performance and about half an hour before midnight, still in her dress. You two found yourselves alone together walking around the side gardens of the dormitory. The main event had been in the middle where the stage was set up, so there wasn't anyone else in your vicinity. She crossed her arms as she glared at you, "And I wasn't nervous. I was just... I was worried that a string might break in the middle of the performance! That would hurt, you know?"
You sighed at her pathetic attempt at being dishonest, "You do remember that you replaced the strings right before the performance, yes? I was with you the whole time."
"T-that's—!" Her face became an impressive shade of red before she burst out, smacking you on the head as she went, "Shut up, you idiot!"
Bodily harm aside, you found long ago that you liked teasing her. It always brings out her dishonest personality that was so adorable it could pass as tsundere. You rather liked your life though so you kept the teasing to a minimum.
You two ended up sitting on one of the concrete planter boxes on the side of the dormitory building. There were only a few minutes before midnight, and you two decided to watch the fireworks right there.
"Did you know that in some Western countries, it's a custom to kiss someone on New Year's Eve?" she asked.
"Really?" you replied. It was actually the first time you'd heard of that tradition, and her asking you that pretty much opened several teasing jabs, so you said, "With you asking me that, does that mean you're asking me to kiss you?"
Once again, she turned a million shades of red, but to your surprise, instead of being violent, she looked away and acted like a shy kitten as she mumbled incomprehensible words under her breath.
You blinked, "Um... Biribiri? You know, this is the part where you say I'm wrong and then you'll hit me..."
She seemed to flinch at your words. But then she burst out, "Ah mou! You're a really insensitive idiot, you know that?"
You just laughed, "Haha, sorry, sorry. I was joking really." You told her, but the idea of kissing her didn't really leave your mind.
It was then that you heard the countdown start.
"It's here!" she said excitedly as the unified shouts of 'Nine!' entered her ears, completely forgetting that she was mad at you.
Eight. Seven.
You glanced at her, watching as her eyes shined in the moonlight waiting for the fireworks. There was a huge smile on her face, and you couldn't help but smile a little too.
Six. Five.
You thought about the tradition she had mentioned earlier, about kissing someone on New Year's Eve when the clock strikes at midnight. Would she mention it to you if she didn't at least consider you a potential kissing partner?
Four. Three. Two.
Did you... consider her a potential kissing partner too?
One.
With a split decision, you acted.
Happy New Year!
Your lips lingered on her cheek for a full second before you finally leaned back. You could feel your own face burn at your action, but you were more worried about the fact that though she was blushing even harder than you were, she hadn't moved a single muscle.
Slowly, her head turned in your direction and she stammered, "T-t-t-that-t's—W-w-w-ha—y-y-y-yoouu..."
You began to realize the reason why you felt different about her, why she seemed so special compared to others.
Looking at her bewildered face, you just smiled. "Well, you got your New Year's Eve kiss now. Why don't we go greet everyone a Happy New Year?"
You grabbed her hand and led her away. You two never talked about the incident again, but that was okay.
Because after that, you realized how you really felt about her.
You liked Misaka Mikoto.
As you pushed through the crowds with her in tow, there was a light feeling of happiness in your chest, and you couldn't be more content to have her by your side.
–
–
–
You were 18, she was 15, and it was the Tokiwadai Middle School's Graduation when you realized how different your worlds were.
She had found her passion in helping people, in saving lives, so during the second semester of her third year in middle school, she had decided to be a doctor.
A Neurologist, she said, so she could accomplish what she had wanted to do ever since she was a little kid: to cure Muscular Dystrophy.
She had also begun consulting Heaven Canceller about it, learning from him the basics of how she could use her ability to help people. She had studied diligently to get the best education, and now, she was graduating middle school as Valedictorian.
There was a huge fuss, as was to be expected. The Third Strongest Level 5 was graduating as the top student in the most prestigious school in Academy City. There were reporters from both inside and outside the city in an attempt to commemorate this important event of the most famous esper.
For the special event, the Garden of Education opened its gates to everyone. Because of this, you were able to go to her graduation without any problems, along with her friends and family. Some of your classmates were there too, having met her before through you.
But the day was special, not because of the occasion, but because you had decided you would tell her how you felt that day. You were so nervous, you couldn't gather enough courage to talk to her before the ceremony started.
"If there's something I've always believed in, it's that levels don't matter." She spoke in her Valedictorian Speech, all eyes and ears on her. "That may sound a little presumptuous coming from me, a Level 5, but I know it's true. I'm not referring to myself, reaching Level 5 when I started off as a Level 1. I'm talking about those people who, despite having no power, choose to help those in need.
"I may be a Level 5, but I'm not invincible. Several times, I had found myself cornered and powerless, unable to fight back. Imagine that, the supposed third most powerful esper, helpless." She met your eyes then, and she smiled, "But at those times, it was those who are considered weak who saved me. It was them who pulled me out of the darkness." You slowly smiled back. She turned back to the audience as she continued, "So to those who think of themselves weak, thank you. You're the reason why I'm strong now."
You didn't think you clapped loud enough when she finished her speech. You were so proud of her, and because of her words, you suddenly felt like you could tell her everything that you felt about her.
Caps were finally tossed and the ceremony was over. You tried to make your way to her through the crowd so you could ask her to come with you to some place more private, and there you'd tell her. But someone else reached her first, and you realized it was Shokuhou Misaki, the 5th Level 5 whom you knew was at odds with Mikoto. She had graduated too, but it seemed like she had been subtly using her ability to make herself less interesting and away from the spotlight.
You stopped a few meters from them, just enough distance to hear their conversation above the noise of the crowd.
"Congratulations, Misaka-san~" the blonde greeted with a mischievous smile, and for once, you noticed Mikoto didn't look irritated even as she pushed her chest out almost tauntingly, "As expected of the Ace, giving such a wonderful Valedictorian speech. Your public speaking ability really is incredible."
"Shokuhou Misaki," Mikoto spoke, matching her rival's gaze for a moment before giving the other girl a soft smile, "Thank you. Congratulations on graduating too."
For a moment, Shokuhou looked stunned, but then she let out a little smirk and replied, "My, my, this is unexpected. Misaka-san is actually saying something nice to me?"
"It's normal, right? We just graduated. We should celebrate, not argue for once."
There was still a gentle smile on Mikoto's face as she spoke while Shokuhou began to fidget lightly under her gaze. You couldn't help but chuckle softly at the scene. Mikoto had always had this strange charm that could make anyone feel warm inside. Being someone who had been subjected to the same thing, you knew exactly how the psychic felt.
After another moment, Mikoto said, "I know we always get on each other's nerves and most of those instances were probably because of me. Well... you too, because even though you know I have a temper, you always tease the heck out of me." She took a step towards the other Level 5 as she continued, "But even with that, I... consider you a friend Shokuhou." You witnessed Mental Out blush and you couldn't look away from the scene, "A... really annoying one, but still a friend." With a smile, she held her hand out to Shokuhou, offering it to her. "So... truce?"
The blonde stared at Mikoto's hand for a moment before breaking out into another mischievous smile. "My, my, to be considered as one of Misaka-san's friends, it truly is a great honour."
Mikoto rolled her eyes at this. "Oh just take the damn hand and shake it."
You felt like you just witnessed a truly important event. The Railgun and Mental Out were finally friends. You were impressed that she had managed to put that pride of hers aside for that moment and reconcile with one of her long time allies. You made a move to approach her once again when Shokuhou left, already planning on talking to her about what you had just witnessed.
But the press didn't give you the chance, whisking her away for interviews as soon as they could. All at once, cameras and microphones surrounded her as reporters threw question after question at her. You had no choice but to retreat and watch her from a distance as she tried to answer them all.
They asked her about her plans for high school, for college, and for the future. How did she feel, graduating as the top student in Tokiwadai? Is she planning on studying abroad? What profession did she want to enter? It was obvious that the crowd was overwhelming her, but she was used to it, and you thought her expressions were just too adorable to pass up.
But then, one of the female reporters asked.
"Do you have a boyfriend, Misaka-san?"
You were probably just as surprised as she was by the question, and she instantly blushed a deep red. "W-what? A b-boyfriend?"
"Surely, you have plenty of suitors, right? Or is it a girlfriend?"
You found yourself holding back a snicker as you listened. "W-w-w-what?! G-g-g-g-girlfriend?! N-no!"
"Does that mean you rejected them?"
"Are you in a relationship with anyone then?"
"Was your special person mentioned in your speech earlier?"
She became more flustered at the onslaught of questions and stuttered out, "E-eh? N-no! Th-th-there's no one! I don't like anyone!"
Something stabbed in your chest at her outburst. Even though she was obviously flustered and most likely lying, you couldn't help but doubt.
Apparently, the reporters realized the same thing and immediately dove on the possible scoop.
"Who is he, Misaka-san?
"Or is it a she?"
"This person must be a high-leveled esper to catch your eye!
"Of course, only someone on the same par as a Level 5 can be worthy of the great Railgun!
"This person must be a Level 5 too then!"
You froze at their words, and all of a sudden, you began to wonder if they were right.
Mikoto didn't seem too keen on answering the questions, and so she announced, "Ah! There are my parents! I'm sorry but I have to be with my family now!" before escaping the crowd of reporters.
The news people were left murmuring to themselves, asking each other 'Who is the Railgun's crush?' as they dispersed into groups and focused on other things.
You were left standing where you were, frozen, as if you had been drenched with cold water. The courage you had gathered earlier to confess was suddenly gone, leaving a huge hole of uncertainty in your chest.
And so the plan of pulling her into one of those deserted alleys, telling her you liked her, asking her to be your girlfriend, and maybe greeting their friends together with your hands intertwined vanished, and all you could do was force yourself to smile as you congratulated her on her graduation.
In the end, you didn't tell her.
Such misfortune.
–
You didn't understand.
You couldn't understand.
You were never one to care about levels, social status and all that crap about someone being unworthy of something (or in this case, someone), so you wondered why you did now.
You frowned as you read the headlines on your phone.
'Who is the Railgun's Crush?'
You honestly thought that was the worst title in the world. The content was even worse, having a full list of possible candidates of who the girl you liked might like. It was absolutely ridiculous. Those guys didn't even put research into the list! Why would Accelerator, Kakine Teitoku and Sogiita Gunha even be on the list? Sure, she got along pretty well with Sogiita, and the Kakine Beetle that was permanently attached to Fremea was okay with her too, but Accelerator was a whole other thing! Why would she even consider them? Just because they're Level 5s doesn't mean she should date them!
And those other people on the list... there were some familiar last names, probably kids of big shot businessmen who wanted to multiply their wealth and fame. You honestly didn't care about those people, but, even if it's a bit childish, what really bothered you was—
"WHY AM I NOT ON THE LIST?!"
You sent a dry look to your left, the one who had just shouted being Shirai after reading the news headline on her own phone. You weren't sure if you should be sympathetic or be creeped out that you were thinking the same thing.
You were with her friends, being the only guy in the group. There was a total of seven people in your table, and going clockwise from Shirai was Uiharu-san, Saten-san, Wannai-san, Awatsuki-san, Kongou-san and finally yourself. You were supposed to have a private celebration with just you and Mikoto, but one way or another, Shirai found out and everyone was coming along.
Such misfortune.
Beside you, Shirai continued to rant, "How do they not know that Shirai Kuroko is the one for Onee-sama?! I'm Onee-sama's partner! I'm a Level 4! I also go to Tokiwadai! I fit all of the list's requirements."
No one dared to point out the huge flaw in her reasoning but Uiharu-san, "...except being a boy..." the girl muttered.
"What did you say?!"
Thankfully, before Shirai could go on a killing spree, Saten-san interrupted, "Ah, but look, Shirai-san! There's a girl list too!" she exclaimed, showing her phone's screen to the twin-tailed teleporter.
"Where?!"
You sighed at the scene in front of you.
Shirai had practically pushed Uiharu-san aside just to read the list that Saten-san had found. "Shokuhou Misaki... Mugino Shizuru... Konori-senpai?! Why is she here?! AND WHERE IS SHIRAI KUROKO ON THIS LIST?!"
"What list are you talking about anyway?" You asked, somehow interested in the supposed Potential Girlfriend List.
"Ah, I found it~" Uiharu-san, ever the reliable computer genius, turned her laptop around so everyone at the table could look at the list that Saten-san had found.
The very first thing you saw was a picture of Shokuhou and Mikoto from graduation, shaking hands. It seemed like she was also the first one on the list, much to your amusement. For some reason though, Mugino, the 4th Level 5 that Mikoto was still not on speaking terms with, was second on the list. It really proved that the media didn't care about the facts as long as they had a headline.
You imagined Shokuhou giggling hysterically at the news though, while Mugino would probably crush whatever device she had read the list on.
There was also a picture of Mikoto and that senior member at the 177th Judgment branch, Konori-san. And as Uiharu-san scrolled down, the list continued; "Wannai Kinuho, Awatsuki Maaya, Saten Ruiko..." you read out loud, getting extremely amused at each picture you saw.
Saten-san was obviously surprised. "Eh?! What? How am I on the list?"
"We're wondering the same," Awatsuki-san spoke up, also looking intently at the screen. There was a picture of the two girls with Mikoto in a pool together. "Ah, that picture!" She exclaimed when she saw it. They weren't wearing school swimsuits so you assumed they went to a public pool somewhere.
"I wonder how they were able to get a hold of those images," Wannai-san said, sounding more curious than anything else.
"It seems everyone has a picture with Misaka-san," Kongou-san pointed out, "Look at this one. Uiharu Kazari."
The flower-head girl seemed to be surprised at the utterance of her name, "Eh?!"
Saten-san immediately took control of Uiharu-san's computer, reading the text out loud, "Uiharu Kazari, a computer nerd of Judgment's 177th branch has been seen alone with the Railgun multiple times. Could she be the one that Number 3 desires?" She scrolled down a bit more and showed everyone the pictures, "Wow, look! There's a lot!"
There was a picture of Mikoto seemingly teaching Uiharu-san to play the violin. While the image did look cute, you wondered why people jumped to conclusions. There was another with the two of them shopping, and the last one was...
"YOU FED HER ICE CREAM?!" Shirai exclaimed, probably damaging your eardrums at the same time.
The girl in question ignored the murderous Teleporter though and was more concerned about the article itself. "C-computer nerd? Do I really look like that?"
You went on and read the next person as the three girls mingled with themselves. "Ah, Kongou-san's here too." You stated.
There was an immediate blush on her cheeks. "A-ara? Really?"
You nodded. "Yeah, and there's more pictures of the two of you than with Uiharu-san." You told her, showing her the pictures.
Three of the five pictures were from the previous Daihaseisai events where Mikoto and Kongou-san had teamed up. You remembered they won all those events and that they had been dubbed as the 'Wind God and Lightning God combo'. You found it adorable, really.
Another picture was of them baking something. There seemed to have been batter on Koongou-san's nose though and the picture captured it at the moment she was trying to wipe it off. The last one was of the two of them waiting at the bus stop. It was raining and Mikoto was lying down on the bench with her head on Kongou-san's lap. You actually felt yourself blush a little. They were too cute.
Shirai seemed to have seen the picture as well and was now seething. "Kooonnngggoooouuuu Miiiiittssuukkkoooooo!"
Kongou-san blushed deeper, and she flicked her ever present fan open to hide her reddening cheeks behind it. "A-ara, I never knew someone was taking a picture of us..."
Shirai practically leaped—or teleported—over the table and onto Kongou-san, grasping the girl's shoulders, "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ONEE-SAMA IN THAT PICTURE?!"
"N-nothing! I was merely trying to help her relax since she told me the thunderstorm had been bothering her!"
"LIES!"
Actually, Kongou-san wasn't lying. You knew from Mikoto herself that particularly strong thunderstorms did affect her electromagnetic senses. She had told you it made her so itchy and tingly that she couldn't relax, so much so that she couldn't sleep at night.
Logic wouldn't work on Shirai though, you decided, as she announced loudly when she realized she wasn't on the girls list either.
"How can they believe any other girl—no, person, or HUMAN BEING—on this planet is worthy of being on that list? They should have a Shirai Kuroko list! Onee-sama's Shirai Kuroko list!"
You let the chaos around you continue as you turned your attention back to the news article. You were waiting for the Level 5 in the family restaurant that she frequented for a small get-together, but she had some sudden errand to run for enrolling in Nagatenjouki, so she was running late.
Reading the stupid bold letters of 'Who is the Railgun's Crush?' (the guys list one) was ticking you off for some reason so you decided to look for other articles about her that didn't include her lovelife.
It was stupid. Why should levels matter when you like someone? Just because she was a super rich, super smart, Level 5 ojou-sama didn't mean she had to date a rich high-leveled esper too. That wasn't like her. If she was, she would have never become friends with you and your other low leveled friends.
You began to feel a little stupid for chickening out on her graduation, and now, you once again felt determined to confess.
You smiled a little to yourself as you read an article of an interview with her, asking about her plans in the future. You knew most of these things but you read them anyway.
She was already Heaven Canceller's apprentice, training herself to be more adept in using her ability to control nerve impulses. She was to enroll in Nagatenjouki, the most prestigious high school in Academy City. She had no concrete plans about college yet, but at the very least, she wanted to try for Tokyo University, or if she was lucky, maybe a university overseas. She would take a premed course, and take higher education to be a Neurologist, and once she had achieved that, she would go back to Academy City and rebuild the Muscular Dystrophy Research Center that had been closed down long ago.
It was such a great dream that you couldn't stop imagining her accomplishing it.
But then... where would you be in that future of hers?
She'd be studying in some faraway university while you were stuck in some normal college here in Academy City, failing your classes. She'd be working to be a doctor while you attempted to be a measly high school teacher. She'd be helping people, saving lives, curing the once incurable disease and getting awards for it while you sat at home eating cup noodles and grading papers.
Suddenly, you wondered...
Where was your place in her brilliant future?
"Oh, right..." you mumbled to yourself, finally realizing how naive you had been, "We live in totally different worlds."
"Hm?" Uiharu-san perked up from across the chair that Shirai had vacated, "Did you say something, Kamijou-san?"
You shook your head, unable to stop a self-mocking smile from creeping up your lips. "It's nothing."
That was what all the fuss had been about. She deserved someone who would be able to stand beside her at those times, someone who could measure up to her and someone who would not bring shame to her name.
She deserved someone a hell lot better than plain old you.
You had always thought you were good enough for her, that if she liked you, that was all that really mattered. But it was merely an illusion you had made up for yourself, a mirror that had cracked when you heard those reporters and finally broke when you realized they were right.
It was such a simple realization that your chest ached all the more.
The last of your courage vanished as you realized you'd never measure up to what she deserved. You clenched your fists as you struggled not to let any emotions show.
"I'm sorry I'm late!"
As expected of your luck, she arrived at that moment. Kongou-san politely scooted closer to Awatsuki-san to make space for Mikoto's chair, and she ended up sitting next to you.
She smiled at you when she was settled, asking, "Did I miss anything?"
There were about a hundred things you wanted to tell her she missed: your plan B for confessing to her, Shirai getting mad for not being on the list of her potential boyfriends (and girlfriends), and you realizing how utterly pathetic you were compared to her.
And finally, realizing how much you didn't deserve her.
"Nothing much," you told her, giving her your usual smile even though your heart was breaking into pieces, "Just Shirai being Shirai. You done with your enrolment?"
"Yeah. They should get back to me next month."
As you went on with your little celebration, you kept stealing glances at her from the corner of your eye. And whenever you saw that beautiful smile of hers, there was one thing on your mind.
'She deserves better.'
And it was then that you decided never to tell her how you felt—even if it hurt like hell.
–
–
–
She was 16, and you were 18 when you realized you loved her.
To some people, this might not be such a big deal, but to you who takes the word and its meaning seriously, it was such an eye-opening event.
Even more so when you've known for a long time that you and her did not match. You cursed the society that gave you these stupid labels, that showed how pathetic you were compared to her, and you cursed yourself for—even after becoming aware of that you weren't good enough—falling in love with her anyway.
It was summer, a few months after her graduation, and you and your friends were on vacation. Your group was supposed to stay in a huge beach house owned by her family as a celebration of her graduation and her recentl birthday. You had wanted to decline when she asked you to come, telling her half-assed excuses about summer homework and extra classes, but you were such a sucker for teary hazel eyes and pouty lips that you gave in.
You've actually been trying to avoid her these past months, but again and again, your will crumbles, and you end up seeking her company because you just wanted to spend time with her.
It was hard for you, to feel so happy whenever she was near, but know that you were forbidden to get any closer.
She was your closest friend, and yet you wanted to be closer than that.
You were wary of joining this little group vacation, knowing that with your misfortune, something was bound to happen that could jeopardize your friendship with her. You couldn't even stand to be alone with her, fearing that if you were given the chance, you would accidentally confess to her or take advantage of her. And while the thought of kissing her senseless was thoroughly enticing, you would never do anything that could potentially lead her to hate you.
You had thought you were safe when on the last night, you two have yet to be left alone together. Nothing unlucky had happened—that was if you didn't consider getting pinched by crabs, stung by a sea urchin (there wasn't even supposed to be urchins on the beach! She said so!) and getting peed on by Tsuchimikado in turn to 'neutralize' the urchin's poison, unlucky—except for that one instance when you tried surfing and fell face first into the water, hitting your head in the process.
You had blacked out underwater, and when you came to, you were greeted by a very worried yet incredibly relieved Mikoto.
"You got us all worried, you idiot." She had said so affectionately.
With your mind in a haze, you had whispered to her, "I don't mind doing it again if I'll always wake up to your face."
She had blushed at that, and only then did you realize what you had said. Thankfully, she had been the only one to hear your words, and the others quickly interrupted your moment to ask about your well-being.
You two hadn't spoken about it since then.
You sighed loudly as you recalled that memory on the last day of your stay on the beach. You sat on the comfy bench on the balcony of the beach house, staring at the countless stars that littered the dark sky. You never asked, and no one ever said anything, but you still wondered, back then when you almost drowned and she had saved you, did she...
Did she perform mouth to mouth resuscitation on you?
You felt yourself blush at the thought, but you couldn't get rid of the idea. You could almost imagine her hands touching your mouth as she opened it, her soft lips pressing against yours and your tongue tasting her warm breath as she—
You slapped yourself. You were seriously turning into a pervert.
"What are you doing?"
Your head snapped towards the entrance of the balcony, and there you saw her standing, newly bathed and looking at you as if she thought you had gone insane.
You didn't think she was completely wrong though.
"N-nothing." You wanted to hit yourself again for stuttering. Just your luck. She had to appear at the exact moment you were thinking about her lips. Such misfortune.
You didn't know what else to say so you kept quiet. She didn't speak for a while either, but after a moment of silence, you heard her approach and finally stop in front of you.
"Can I sit?" she asked, and you merely nodded, trying to avoid her gaze at all costs. You still weren't sure whether you could control yourself around her, especially right after that short daydream of you two kissing.
You felt her sit down beside you, near enough that you could feel her warmth but too far for you to touch. Even though it was summer, the night could get a bit chilly by the beach so she was wearing a thin green jacket. She had her arms crossed over her chest, even as she looked up to the sky you had been gazing at a few moments ago, and the silence dragged on.
It was a few minutes later when she let out an audible breath and asked, "Are you mad at me?"
You were surprised at her question, and immediately answered, "Huh? Of course not."
When you looked at her, there was a worried frown on her face as she looked down on her lap. "Is there something bothering you then?"
This time, you didn't reply right away, hesitating for just a moment before saying, "No... I'm fine."
She sighed, "You know I can tell when you're lying most of the time."
You turned your gaze to the ground in front of you, pondering. Of course she'd notice. You've been friends for years. But how could you tell her that what's bothering you was your ever growing feelings for her? That you liked her so much that it hurts when she wasn't around? That even though you felt this way, you could never tell her because you knew you weren't worthy of her?
You pursed your lips, unsure of what to say. You could tell her, but the insecurities that had been building up inside were already at the point that you'd believe anyone who would say that she was too good for you.
So instead you asked, "How do you know you're right about me lying?"
"It just... it feels like you've been avoiding me lately..."
Her shy admission made you turn back to her and see the troubled expression on her face.
She continued, "And not just from when you said..." she trailed off, and you knew she was referring to that surfing incident, "I mean, even long before this week, there have been times that you seem so keen on avoiding me. Like, when I try to call you, your phone's always empty or when I ask you to hang out, you always have homework to do. But then, the next day or so, you'll be the one visiting me at my dorm and dragging me to places, and I just..."
You suddenly felt guilty when she explained. You didn't think she'd even noticed your attempts at distancing yourself from her. You forgot that though you were so conflicted about spending time with her, to her you were still her friend. Nothing really changed between the two of you, except that you found yourself liking her more each day.
"I'm sorry," you apologized quietly, "I didn't think you'd notice."
She looked at you then, "So there is something bothering you."
You gave her a guilty smile, not knowing how to deny her claim. "It's... nothing you should worry about though, I promise." You told her, hoping she wouldn't pry enough that you'd reveal your secret. "I was just a bit conflicted about some things and I didn't want you to worry about it."
She was still staring at you, studying your face for any hint of dishonesty before her cheeks started to redden. "And what about t-the... w-what you s-s-said o-on the b-beach..."
"That was to bring out that exact reaction of yours," you said, putting on the biggest grin on your face that you could muster and hoping she'd believe that terrible lie, "Really, Biribiri, haven't you gotten used to my teasing yet?"
She became silent, and you felt her aura become darker as she began to growl, "Y-you... YOU IDIOT!"
"OW! What the hell was that for?!"
"I can't believe you'd pull a trick like that on me! I almost thought that you—" she suddenly cut herself off, and you wondered why.
So you prompted, "That I what?"
Her face became a darker hue as she vehemently denied, "N-nothing! It's nothing at all! Haha. You must be imagining things."
Your conversation went like usual, bickering, being embarrassed, getting hit, until you two settled to a more familiar atmosphere where you only occasionally spoke in low voices to break the comfortable silence.
Next thing you knew, she had her head settled on your shoulder and your cheek was on top of her head. Your arms were intertwined, and neither of you minded as you gazed at the glittering stars.
"Hey, Touma?" she murmured in the middle of the silence.
"Hm?" you hummed back without moving an inch.
"Don't scare me like that again, you hear?" she said softly but sternly, making you turn your head a little so you could see a part of her head. Some loose strands of her hair tickled your nostrils as she continued, "You can tease me all you want, and you can make fun of me, but take care of yourself next time, okay? I... I don't want to lose you again."
You remembered Misaka Imouto telling you once that after you had turned down her help in World War III, the clone with her had witnessed her cry.
You felt something twist in your gut, and you took her hand in yours and squeezed it as you said, "Never," you vowed, "I won't leave you alone, Mikoto."
You were sure that her face was burning as she squeezed back but she didn't let go. And as the summer night breeze blew the scent of her shampoo to your nose, you knew.
You loved Misaka Mikoto.
And with that, there was only one thought in your mind.
Damn it all.
–
–
–
She just turned 17, and you were 19 when you realized she loved you back.
It was the night of her birthday... well, actually it was the early morning of the day after her birthday since the date had already turned. As a celebration of her birth, you had planned an overnight birthday party for her, booking a big hotel room in the process. Many of her and your friends chipped in for the payment though mostly those rich friends she had from Nagatenjouki (Shirai, Kongou-san, Awatsuki-san, Wannai-san, and even Shokuhou too) were the ones who did most of the paying. Those who weren't as financially able were given the task of shopping, cooking and decorating the room for the night, or in the case of Aogami and Tsuchimikado, they were the errand boys.
You had all managed to surprise her. You led her to a hotel room after 'accidentally' spilling your drink all over her, though in response, she had thrown hers at your face, drenching you in her drink as well. With the two of you both sticky and wet, you insisted that you two should go rent a hotel room and change.
It was honestly pretty funny and odd for you, because she didn't even question it. You knew she usually booked hotel rooms to change clothes but you still couldn't fathom why she would do that, no matter how convenient it may have currently been for you.
You decided it must be an ojou-sama thing.
You offered to pay for the room yourself, as an apology, you had said, but in truth, it was to lead her to the room you and your friends had already booked.
You opened the door and told her to come in, and the moment she did, there was a chorus of 'Happy Birthday!' from the people in the room.
She had looked so happy that you couldn't help but take out your phone and snap a picture of her, later saying that it was for documentation or some other excuse.
You were planning on keeping a copy of it though, so you could keep the memory of her smiling face wherever you go.
'You're such an idiot, Kamijou.' You thought to yourself, wondering for a short moment if continuously dreaming of her even though you've decided long ago that you'd never be good enough for her made you a bit of a masochist. You couldn't help it though, because somehow it hurt less to be beside her as a friend than to not have her at all.
That, or your stupid heart was really just too stubborn to move on.
"Misaka-san~"
Your thoughts were interrupted when a familiar mischievous voice reached your ears.
You and Mikoto both turned to find Shokuhou Misaki approaching.
"Shokuhou," Mikoto acknowledged the blonde with a friendly smile, "I didn't think you'd actually come."
Since graduating middle school, the two Level 5s had become rather good friends, and though they still mercilessly teased each other just for the heck of it, the initial animosity between them had vanished, replaced with an aura of merriment that you found enjoyable whenever they argued.
"Of course I did. I wouldn't miss Misaka-san's birthday for the world~" she stated, all the while holding a bottle that looked suspiciously like liquor, "And since you just turned a year older, what do you say we celebrate and have a good time?"
You blinked when she showed the two of you that the bottle was indeed some kind of liquor. It looked like white wine but since you were never a drinker—or you just didn't have the money to buy—you really weren't sure.
Mikoto on the other hand seemed to know exactly what it was and gave Shokuhou a raised eyebrow. "How in the world did you even get—wait, no, scratch that. I know exactly how you got it," she interrupted herself, pushing a finger against her forehead in slight irritation.
Shokuhou didn't lose her bright smile as she ignored Mikoto's reaction. "How I got these isn't what's important. Right now, we have to take advantage of the situation and see how strong your celebration ability is~"
Mikoto gave her a dry look. "You're just trying to see if alcohol will let you get into my head, aren't you?"
You tried to suppress a smile when Shokuhou flinched. "W-what a thing to say! Of course not!"
"That's a guilty answer right there!"
You weren't really sure what happened, but although everyone in Mikoto's birthday party was underaged, they all drank from the numerous bottles of liquor that Shokuhou was able to smuggle. Not that you were surprised she was able to, but what was more surprising was the amount of people who got tipsy or drunk.
You woke up with your head spinning in the middle of the night...or morning since when you checked the clock, it was several minutes after 2 am. You found yourself lying on the floor beside the dining table. How you got there, you had no idea, but around you people were passed out as well. Most of the girls ended up either on the sofa or the carpet, lying beside each other. But Shokuhou and Mikoto somehow passed out in the kitchen with Shokuhou sprawled over the kitchen countertop, completely unconscious. Mikoto was sitting on the floor with her back against the refrigerator when you found her, her head was hanging limply that her chin touched her chest and she was lightly snoring as she slept.
For a moment, you simply stared at her thinking how adorable she was when she was asleep. You remembered how the two Level 5s got into a drinking match last night, and though Mikoto had been the one to remind everyone that they were all underaged and that they should be responsible, she really just couldn't say no to a challenge from Shokuhou.
You weren't really sure who won that contest, but her position was bound to give her a stiff neck when she woke up in the morning so you decided to move her to the bedroom where she'd be comfortable on a bed.
You were careful not to wake her as you put your arms under her legs and back, carrying her in an almost romantic way. Slowly, you walked across the room and into the bedroom, trying not to disturb anyone and selfishly basking in that short moment that you had her in your arms.
You wouldn't mind if she'll always get drunk, so long as you'll be able to put her to bed like this.
You set her down gently on the mattress, taking her shoes off and putting a blanket over her form to make her more comfortable.
"You really got smashed tonight, huh?" you asked her sleeping form quietly, smiling lightly to yourself, "And you were even the one who scolded Shokuhou so much. I thought you said you wouldn't drink?"
Predictably, she didn't reply, so instead, you brushed a stray lock of her hair to the side and, after a moment of hesitation, leaned in to plant a gentle kiss on her forehead.
"Goodnight, Mikoto," you told her before standing up so you could search for blankets to drape over your other friends.
But then, you stopped when you heard her call, "Touma..."
Hesitantly, you turned around, fearing that she'd been awake when you kissed her and had realized your feelings for her.
But she merely rolled over to her side, facing you, before mumbling some incomprehensible words under her breath.
You let out a relieved sigh when you realized it was a false alarm.
"...I love you, you idiot..."
You froze when you heard her say.
"...I really love you..." she repeated, "Why don't you get it?"
You stood there unmoving until the first rays of sunlight made their way into the room. You had been so surprised and overwhelmed at what she had said. You knew she was merely sleep talking, but that didn't mean her words didn't hold any truth. You stayed with her all night hoping that maybe, just maybe, she'd say those words again.
But even if she didn't talk until morning came, you didn't mind, because hearing it once—and even twice—was enough to make your heart feel so elated as if it was going to burst in joy any moment.
You loved her.
And now you knew she loved you too.
–
You wanted to talk to her, to ask her if she really meant what she had said. But you'd concluded long ago that you were full of misfortune and the world hated you so in the end, she couldn't remember a thing.
It was the most frustrating thing in your life.
She had woken up groggy and with a massive hangover, and after mumbling curses about headaches under her breath, the first thing she had asked you when she caught sight of you was, "What happened?"
You felt dread overcome you as you asked, "Do you remember anything from last night?"
She merely groaned, holding her head between her palms as she squeezed her eyes shut. "The party... Shokuhou... drinks... ugh, I think Shokuhou challenged me to a drinking contest. After that, I got nothing."
Your heart sank at her words, but you figured you shouldn't have been surprised. She had been sleep talking after all. Such misfortune.
You were conflicted over whether you should bring it up. Should you tell her how she told you, half-drunk and half-asleep, that she loved you? Did she actually mean those words words or were they merely spoken because of the influence of excessive alcohol?
You wanted to find out. You had to find out because if you didn't you felt like you'd go insane, wondering if your love for her could possibly be more than one-sided.
And so, you tried subtle ways to figure it out. You tried to see how she was with other guys—did she stutter when she talked to Etzali that time you two bumped into him at the mall? Did she blush when Gunha's hands brushed against hers when they were trying out arcade games to compete on? Has she ever looked at anyone the way you looked at her?
Your attempts proved fruitless and it frustrated you. How was it that you know her the best but you couldn't even figure out who she liked? It wasn't that she wasn't interested in anyone. You knew for certain that Saten-san and Uiharu-san—mostly the first one though—loved to tease her about her love life. Several times before she had come to you with her cheeks aflame, and when you inquired about them, all she said was that Saten-san was teasing her about someone. That someone's name never came out though, so you still had no idea who it was.
That thought brought you back to the initial problem at hand: were you really that someone?
You groaned, hooking an arm over your eyes as you leaned back on the park bench. You were supposed to meet Mikoto in a few minutes, but since she wasn't here yet, you decided to brainstorm about ways that you could find out whether she felt the same or not. Your possible future love life depended on this, and after everything that had happened and every realization you'd had, you were too scared to even try confessing to her without assurance.
It was pathetic, really, how much you hesitated when it came to her. You've faced supernatural beings like magicians and Saints, and single-handedly faced a Magic God without faltering, but you couldn't even muster up the courage to tell the girl you love about your feelings.
It must be part of this falling in love thing; not only do you lose your sanity whilst thinking non-stop about her but you also become a scaredy cat when it comes to confessing to her.
Such misfortune.
"What's got you looking so frustrated?" Her voice pierced your ears and you yelped a little, surprised by how close she had sounded. When you looked, she was sitting beside you on the bench, holding a can of juice in each hand. She held one out to you, saying, "Here, drink up. You look like you need some refreshment or you'll burn out trying to think."
You semi-glared at her, wanting to retort but unable to lest she figure out what exactly was in your thoughts. You took the can she offered and mumbled a low thanks before holding it between your palms, staring at it instead of consuming it. You heard the soft pop when she opened her own can, and you waited a moment before saying, "Hey, Mikoto. Can I ask you something?"
She turned to you, her expression curious. "Sure."
You hesitated for a moment before saying, "Have you ever thought about getting into a romantic relationship?"
There was the sound of spraying, and you turned to her only to realize that she had been about to drink when you spoke. The ground in front of her was wet with the juice she had just sprayed, and she hastily attempted to wipe her mouth as her cheeks turned a deep red. "W-w-w-what was that all of a sudden?!"
You tried to suppress a smile at her adorable reaction. "Oh, so you've thought about it?"
"I-I...!" she looked like she wanted to retort but didn't say a word. She closed her mouth and looked away, still blushing. Your eyebrow rose at this, expecting her to deny your claim like the tsundere she was. You were a little surprised when she mumbled in reply, "Of course I have."
You wanted to tease her but you felt the seriousness in her voice. Your gaze went back to your hands, fiddling with the can of juice she had given you and murmured back, "I see."
It took another moment for her to continue, "You know, we're at that age, when we start thinking about the rest of our lives," she said, throwing the can she was holding in the thrash can near the bench, "and it's not just our career choices, but also our... well, romantic relationships."
There was a tone in her voice that made you glance at her. "You don't sound so optimistic about it," you remarked.
"Once you've experienced liking someone, you'll realize it isn't as happy as everyone else makes it out to be," she stated, her gaze becoming melancholic and far-off, "You'll find out that just because you like that person, it doesn't mean you'll end up together. And sometimes, no amount of trying will make you succeed."
You felt yourself frown a little at her words. You wanted to retort, but you could understand where she was coming from so instead you asked, "You like someone?"
You were slightly surprised when she admitted, "I do." When you looked at her, her cheeks were a little red and she was dutifully avoiding your gaze. "I've liked him for a while now and... I don't think he'll ever like me back."
Your heart sped up in anticipation, hoping this was the chance you've been looking for to finally find out what she truly felt about you. "Why do you say that? Are you not on good terms or something?"
She shook her head, "It's not that. We're friends, actually. Like, really really good friends..." she trailed off a little, before continuing, "We're so close that it feels like that's all he'll ever see me as—a really good friend."
"Have you tried telling him?"
"No," she admitted.
"Then why not confess?" you prompted her, hoping that she will so you'd finally have some peace of mind.
She smiled scornfully to herself. "Believe it or not, I'm afraid of getting rejected. I just don't want to risk it like that."
"Shouldn't it be easier though?" you asked, "You're friends. Even if he does reject you, he won't hate you or anything."
"That's not really how it goes, Touma. He's a very important person to me. He's been there for me so many times, and he's saved me... If I told him and he rejected me, we might not be able to be friends anymore and I don't think I can handle that." She confessed, looking down sadly, "I can take the heartache, but I don't think I could survive it if he hated me."
You frowned deeply at her words, because although everything she had said so far pointed to you (how many men had saved her before? At least, you were hoping it was only you), her reasons for keeping it a secret bothered you. "Why would you think that would happen?"
She sighed. "It's just that... I have this friend," she began, looking more disturbed as she continued, "We were kind of like childhood friends. She and I used to play a lot together when we were kids, back when I was still too young to go to Academy City. We still see each other during special occasions and we started messaging each other back when I became a Level 5. And a few months ago, she told me she got a boyfriend.
"I was really happy for her, you know?" she said, smiling sadly, "She's been crushing on the guy for a while now, and finally, they got together... but unfortunately, they didn't last long."
Your brows furrowed lightly at her words. "What happened?"
"Her family happened," she spoke in an angry voice, "And her friends, and practically everyone she thought she could trust."
You stared at her as her anger showed in her expressions, wondering what exactly happened. So you asked, "What do you mean by that?"
She sighed and then massaged her temples, seemingly in an attempt to appease her own emotions, "My friend is from a really rich family, someone who's name is well-known. The guy that she liked was just a simple working student that she met in college." She began to look sad as she said, "Her family didn't approve of him, saying that he's not good enough for her. Even those so called friends of hers didn't like him, just because he doesn't have a car to pick her up with."
There was just too much in her friend's story that was in common with yours that you felt the need to defend them."But I thought they got together."
"They did..." she affirmed with another sad smile, "But it probably would've been better if they didn't."
You dreaded the answer as you questioned, "Why not?"
"They're not even friends anymore." She told you, and for some reason, your chest felt heavier at her revelation, "For some reason, the guy started getting insecure, believing all the crap my friend's families and friends have been telling him. They broke up because, apparently, 'they don't belong in the same world'. What kind of pathetic reasoning is that? They can't even stand seeing each other. Something about the breakup being too painful."
You turned your head to focus in front of you. You stared at nothing as you found yourself relating to the guy in the story. "Is that so?"
"But it doesn't make sense to me." She continued, "Why would they even breakup if they still like each other? Why does it matter what everyone else thinks?"
"Maybe it doesn't, but it doesn't mean they won't get affected by what everyone says," you replied without thinking, and you yourself were as surprised as she was when she turned to you.
"What exactly does that mean?" she demanded, and you knew she was a little angry that you actually thought the way you did.
You looked down at your lap as you began to think of a way to explain to her without offending her. She was beautiful, rich and a Level 5. She was practically too good for everyone. How could she understand the insecurities that the guy must've felt—the uncertainty that you felt?
"I'm a Level 0, Mikoto, and an idiot to boot," you began, and though it sounded self-demeaning, you knew it was true, "I'm not rich either, so if somehow, I fell for a smart high-class girl"—which you did—"and we began dating, people will wonder why it happened. And even more, they'll think I'm just after her money or her status or something."
"And why does it matter if everyone thinks that?" she retorted, and you can feel her glare even as you looked away, "It's your life. They shouldn't have any say in it."
"You don't get it. Just because they can't decide for you, doesn't mean their words can't affect what you think," he responded back, trying to be as calm as you could, "They'll say that I'm not good enough for her, and I'll just be in the way of her bright future." You spoke, unable to filter your words. The topic was too close to your current dilemma that you couldn't stop yourself from saying it. "And even if their words aren't true, the ideas that I've never even considered will be planted in my head, and I'll begin to wonder if the rest world is actually right while I'm wrong."
"And since when are you like that, huh, Touma?" she asked in a challenging tone.
"Oh c'mon," you finally met her angry gaze, and you tried to match its intensity, "Don't tell me that's never happened to you. You're a Level 5. Hasn't anyone told you that the only reason why you're one of Academy City's heroes is because of your power? That you only have so many friends because of your title? You know they're not true, but don't you dare tell me those words never put a single seed of doubt in your mind because you'd be lying."
She seemed to have been silenced by your words. Slowly, you saw comprehension in her eyes, and you began to realize how harsh you had sounded with her. You pinched the bridge of your nose, trying to diffuse the slight anger that had built inside of you at the topic. It wasn't her fault, and you didn't mean to sound as harsh as you did but you didn't want to take what you said back either. Because right now, that was exactly what you were feeling.
What if what happened to her friend happened to the two of you? What if you confessed and she accepted, and then you began dating? Will people question your relationship too? Will they doubt you too much that you two will break up as well? Will you stop being friends too?
No. You knew how much it hurt to keep inside what you felt for her, but you know you wouldn't survive if you lost her friendship too. You knew there was a possibility that you won't end up like her friend, but the idea was there and you couldn't shake it off. Even though you should be certain that your friendship was strong enough to survive something like that, it terrifies you just to think that it was possible.
"I..." she began, trailing off as she tried to figure out what to say, "I think I should go now. I'll... I'll see you some other time."
You nodded silently to her and she left without another word.
And just like that, your final attempt to confess was gone, and what was left was your resolve to never tell her about your feelings for fear of ruining the friendship that let you survive everyday in pain.
–
–
–
She was 18 and you just turned 21 when you confessed.
It wasn't even a formal confession. It was your birthday. You and your guy friends got drunk. She dragged your stumbling ass back to your dorm.
The world couldn't seem to stop spinning and you were mildly aware of the whole travel home. With her great athletic abilities, she managed to put you to bed whilst you spouted out words that remained unfiltered due to your intoxicated state.
"Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?" you slurred and though you were drunk, you never forgot your conversation with her.
"Yes," she replied patiently, hovering over your sprawled out form and holding a glass of water, "You've said that five times on the way here. Now drink this or you'll have a massive hangover tomorrow."
She tried to sit you up but failed when you twisted in her arms, "No, you don't get it," you said, pushing yourself up as much as you could and facing her with your own power, "I mean you're really really beautiful. Like, the most beautiful girl I have ever seen!"
"Yes, yes, thank you very much. Now this beautiful girl is asking you to drink this, please?"
You grumbled at her dismissal but followed her instructions. Once the glass was empty, she smiled at you, removing your shoes and socks, and tucking you in before taking the glass back to the sink. She returned shortly, sitting on the side of your bed and running a hand through your hair.
"Why did you drink so much?" she asked quietly, your eyes closing as you savored her touch, "You've never gotten drunk before."
You pouted a little as you remembered, "Pig-tailed she-demon said you agreed to go out with that rich med student you met in campus. You didn't tell me. I was hurt."
"I'm sorry." You opened an eye to peek at her expression. She smiled at you apologetically, as she continued, "I wanted to tell you but I didn't think it was the right time to do so at your birthday party."
You made an unintelligible noise of disagreement, "Not that."
"Hm?"
"Not hurt about not telling me," you explained as you took her free hand cradled it to your face, "Hurt because I want you. Love you."
She froze at that moment and if only you hadn't been too intoxicated to think, you'd have realized your mistake.
"…what?"
"I love you." You repeated, reaching out to touch her cheek as you tried to stare at her blurred face, "And I don't want any else to have you."
To your horror, she began to retreat, prying her hands from your grasp. "You're drunk, Touma, you don't mean that."
You caught her before she could go too far and pulled her to you, making her fall on your chest. You held her face in your hands delicately as you touched your nose to hers, "I love you," you repeated one last time before pressing your lips against hers.
The kiss was, unfortunately, too blissfully wonderful that your drunk mind could not remember it all. All you do recall were the warmth of her breath on your face, and the sounds of your mixed pants when you finally finished.
You were so happy, you smiled so stupidly by the end of it.
After that, however, your consciousness faded, and the last thing you heard was her soft voice saying, "If only you meant that."
–
She avoided you like the plague after that. You tried calling her but she refused to answer your calls. And for some reason, she was always busy whenever you see her friends around the city.
It was three days after the incident when you ambushed her at her dorm and was finally able to talk to her.
For a moment, the two of you stood frozen at her door, eyes locked. There were so many things you wanted to say to her but at that moment, all you could think of was how much you missed her and how much you wanted to embrace her right there.
She was the one who broke the moment, leaning against the door frame as she gave you a curt "Hi."
You replied with a "Hi," of your own and suddenly, the air was awkward.
"How did you get in here? Boys aren't allowed in the dorm." She crossed her arms as she asked, just so the silence could be filled.
"I got the okay from your Dorm Manager," you told her, lifting a shoulder in a half-shrug, "I haven't seen you in a while," you went straight to the point, choosing not to beat around the bush. She stiffened lightly at your words, "You've been avoiding me?"
She was quiet for a moment before she replied, "You wouldn't believe me if I said no, so what's the point of asking?"
You stared at her for a while, watching her intently as she dutifully avoided your gaze. Finally, you sighed, ruffling your hair before saying, "I'm sorry."
Her eyes found their way to yours and you ended up being the one to avert your gaze. "For what?"
"For kissing you like that,"
You saw her stiffen. "…you remember."
"Yeah…" you clarified hesitantly and continued, "And I'm sorry for confessing like that."
She shook her head in dismissal, forcing out a smile. "It's fine. You were drunk. You were bound to do and say things you didn't mean."
"That's not what I meant."
She looked at you, her face blank.
You swallowed a little, continuing, "I was sorry because I was drunk," you told her, "But I don't regret doing any of that." You admitted, laughing lightly when you realized it sounded worse than you thought, but everything was so messed up that you didn't think it could get any worse so you continued. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."
"Touma, what...?"
"I'm saying I love you," you confessed but then added, "again... now that I'm sober."
You could only imagine how shocked she was as she looked at you with wide-eyes.
She stared at you as you admitted with a sad smile. "It wasn't the alcohol, Biribiri."
You met her gaze, and for a long moment, you two stayed like that as her crossed arms fell limply to her sides. The disbelief was slowly showing on her face, and she turned her head away seemingly trying to comprehend your words. Then, she asked with a strained voice, "...why?"
"Why what?" you asked, not expecting her question.
"Why are you telling me this?" she elaborated, her tone becoming angry as she met your eyes once again, "Why now?"
"You mean, 'why now that you've decided to move on'?" you rephrased, knowing that it was exactly what she was thinking. She frowned at your words, but her gaze didn't falter. You found yourself to be the one unable to hold her gaze, and you ended up looking away. Lowly, you admitted, "I never planned on telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because if I told you, you'd be stuck with me," you told her, finally revealing a part of you that had wanted her for so long, yet unable to confess to her because of your damned insecurities. You turned your gaze down to your shoes, feeling too ashamed as you finally told her, "You're too bright, Mikoto, too good for someone like me."
Realization slowly dawned on her as she understood what your words meant, and you could see a trace of hurt in her eyes that sent a stab to your chest, "You... you knew?" she uttered in disbelief, "All this time you knew I was in love with you, and you never said anything? You pretended to be the oblivious idiot?" she demanded, sounding every bit accusing as she looked at you and you desperately tried to avoid her gaze, "How could you?"
In a tight voice, you told her, "I don't deserve you."
"Don't pull that 'you're too good' bull on me." she growled lowly, and you could feel the glare that she was sending even without seeing it, "You say you don't deserve me yet all this time I've been doubting if I even deserved you. So you have no right, Touma, no right to tell me who I do or don't deserve."
"I'm nothing!" you burst out, all the frustrations that had built up over the years coming out as you told her, "I'm no one, Mikoto, a Level 0 with only misfortune to his name. I'm not rich or handsome. Hell, I'm not even smart! What do I have to show that I deserve someone... like... you?" your loud voice softened as you finished your sentence, losing strength as you went on, and all that remained in your chest was the desperate feeling of wanting her but knowing you could never have her. You clenched your jaw in order to keep your composure as you asked her sadly, "How can I have you when I can't even step on the same ground as you?"
Her gaze was as soft as her voice when she said, "You know I don't care about that."
"Well, I do." You said, "Everyone else does."
"You've never cared about what others thought." She pointed out.
You let out an unhumorous laugh as you shook your head, "Not until I fell in love with you."
Slap.
The next thing you knew, your head was turned to the side because of the force of her hit, and there was a sting on your cheek as the silence between you went on.
After a long moment, she told you in a tight voice, "The Touma I love is someone who stands for what he believes in and beats up anyone who says otherwise until they believe in it too." You didn't reply, at a loss of what you should say to her. She was right about you though, but you knew she'd just be mad if you told her that everything in your life had changed when she made her way inside your heart. You chanced a look at her and you saw her teary but furious glare, the hand that she had slapped you with still raised but clenched into a fist.
Finally, she took a staggering breath and said, "Come back when you're that person again." Then she turned around, going back inside her room before shutting the door at your face.
You were left standing there in front of her room, unable to do anything but wallow in self pity. You could feel the curious stares of other girls that lived in the dorm, but you ignored them, pushing yourself to just walk away.
Because nothing else mattered anymore now that she knew that you loved her too.
–
Maybe you were being rash.
Maybe you were being illogical.
But she was going on a date with that med student you heard about and you just had the impulse to save her from that guy.
(Although you knew that 'save' was just the word you used to convince yourself that you were not doing this completely because of selfish reasons.)
Sure, she was a Level 5 and can take care of herself if ever the guy did something inappropriate, but it didn't matter because all you could think of was to stop their date because no way in hell will you ever let anyone touch your Mikoto.
Maybe you didn't even have the right to call her yours but all logic had left you when Saten-san told you about it.
Marching purposely into a fancy restaurant where her date was supposed to be, you promptly ignored the guy at the door who asked you if you had a reservation. You obviously didn't so you saw no point answering him, but when you realized that your action made him ask for security, you hastily explained that you were merely looking for someone who had a reservation and would be leaving shortly.
The guy didn't seem convinced but he let you go anyway when you were able to tell him Mikoto's name when he asked who you were looking for. It worked out because he even told you where their table was and you strode towards the direction until you spotted her hazel hair.
You felt your anger rise tenfold as you caught a glance of the guy she was with. Cleanly cut brown hair that obviously used too many hair wax and he was wearing a pair of glasses. He was dressed in formal attire, no doubt to match the fancy atmosphere of this ridiculously fancy restaurant, and he was just about to offer Mikoto a red rose.
You almost ran towards him, wanting to halt what he was about to do because damn it, if Mikoto accepted it, even if it was out of politeness, you would forever regret that you didn't do it first when you've had more than four years of chances.
From the corner of your eye, you saw Mikoto look at you in surprise but you ignored her, raising your fist and slamming it against the guy's cheek. He tumbled out of his chair and everyone in the restaurant looked at the sudden crash. Even Mikoto stood up, looking at you in disbelief. You avoided her gaze and instead glared at the downed guy in front of you, growling, "You stay the fuck away from her."
"Touma!" you heard her shout at you. You met her angry gaze as she came to the guy's aid, as if trying to be his shield from you. "What in the world was that about?!"
You didn't know what to say. You breathed deeply in and out, trying to calm yourself. But before you or Mikoto could say another word, security guards were already grasping you arms and shoulders, pulling you away from Mikoto and the guy.
You didn't put up much of a fight, not when Mikoto didn't even try to help you. You were suddenly struck with the realization of how stupid you had acted. You lost your cool and attacked an innocent guy without warning. You were blinded by your jealousy that it clouded your mind. You wouldn't be surprised if Mikoto did start to hate you after your stunt. You were such an idiot.
You were unceremoniously thrown out of the restaurant with threats from the security guards, telling you never to come back. You picked yourself up and dusted your pants as you stared at the door closing. Even if it was impossible, you had hoped that maybe she would chase after you even just to scold you. But after a full minute of waiting, you realized it was merely wishful thinking.
Your anger had almost completely diminished by then, but that left you feeling miserable and damn it, you really wanted to punch yourself for what you had just done.
Whatever chance you may have had with the girl you loved was probably gone the moment you hit the guy's face.
Your heart hurt, and you gripped your shirt above your chest in a helpless attempt to get rid of it. You tried not to let the anguish consume you as you forced yourself to walk away from the restaurant—away from her, and wished for some miracle that she would not completely take you out of her life because of your stupidity.
You had taken a turn from the main thoroughfare and into a smaller street that led to your current dormitory building. It was a shortcut that you had discovered before and since curfew in Academy City was already in effect, the way was deserted apart from you. You grimly wondered if the world was mocking you or trying to comfort you by giving you space, but in the end, you just felt so bitter that you hit the nearest lamppost with your fist on impulse.
The pain that shot up through your knuckles was a welcomed distraction from the pain in your chest, and you stood pathetically under that lamppost, trying to focus on how much your fist hurt instead of your heart.
You almost laughed at the flow of your thoughts. You had never been so pathetic.
You were too busy wallowing in self-pity that you didn't even hear the footsteps approaching from behind you until someone shouted, "You idiot!"
You looked up at the sound of her voice, surprised but utterly happy that she even bothered to chase you here, "Mikoto..."
She ran towards you at full speed, calling out, "You..." then, the light from one of the posts illuminated her angry expression, "You stupid aggressive idiot! How in the world could you that?!"
You yelped at the sudden onslaught of electricity from her forehead. Instinctively, you raised your right arm to negate it, protecting yourself from any harm. "What was that for?! You could've seriously—BBBVFFHHHH!" The air from your lungs was instantly pushed out when her foot connected with your stomach. Suddenly, you forgot everything that you had been sulking about before.
Mikoto stood in front of you with a glare directed your way. She was panting from the run she had obviously done when she chased you, but the fact that she was a little sweaty and tired didn't make her any less intimidating. With her fists clenched, she demanded, "How could you just punch Suzuki-san like that? He didn't do anything to you!"
You were still a little out of breath from her earlier hit, and your belly still hurt a lot from the hit, but you managed to mumble, "Of course, you're worried about him."
You didn't really intend for her to hear but she did anyway, and her response wasn't pretty. "Of course, I am! We were on a date, Touma, and you had no business to be there in the first place!"
You snorted, becoming incredibly annoyed at the flow of their conversation, "Well then, maybe you should've told me you were going on a date in the first place! If this Sukuzi really was important, then why didn't you just say so?!"
"Why do you need to know?" she retorted, stepping closer, "You're not my dad, and you're definitely not my boyfriend. As a matter of fact, you've made it perfectly clear that you don't want a relationship between us, so just back off."
You gritted your teeth at her words. "I don't care." You growled lowly.
"What?" she asked back, frustrated.
"I said I don't care!" you roared back, finally losing grip of whatever was left in your self-restraint. Everything you've been feeling since your unconventional confession and her justified rejection came tumbling out of your mouth. "I don't care if he's smarter or better looking, or if he's richer and is a hell lot better for you than I am. I don't care what anyone else would say because you know what? I love you, and there's no way in hell am I gonna let someone else take you without a fucking fight!"
There was moment of silence between the two of you with her just staring at you with an expression you couldn't read.
But then she began to move and walked towards you, mumbling, "Finally, you stupid idiot." before pulling you by your shirt and into a kiss.
You couldn't move at the shock of her suddenly doing that, but her lips were so soft against yours that you were swept along and you kissed her back, thinking that finally, finally, you were kissing her.
You could swear that you were so happy, you could've died right then and there without any regrets.
When you both parted for air, your breaths mixed as you kept her forehead against yours. You didn't know when your arms had found their way to her waist or when her arms had wrapped over your neck, but you didn't mind, because as cheesy as it may sound in your head, you thought that you two fit perfectly like this and that you wanted to stay like this for as long as you could.
Once both of your breathing had evened out, you met her eyes and saw the same happiness you were feeling. You smiled a little bit and said, "Not that I'm not happy, but I thought for sure you were going to chew me out a lot longer."
"Shut up." She replied playfully, matching the smile you were wearing, "You have no idea how long I've waited to do that."
You hummed, your gaze dropping back to her lips, "I think I can guess."
You leaned down to capture her lips again but her finger stopped you. With a finger pressed against your mouth, she gave you a reprimanding look, "But just because I forgive you for that crap speech about not deserving me and making this whole relationship thing more complicated than it should be doesn't mean that I forgive you for hitting Suzuki-san. He didn't do anything wrong."
You frowned at her words, pushing her hand away so you could speak, "He asked you out on a date. I think that's enough of an offense."
"Idiot, he was getting pressured by his parents to court me so he asked for my help to do this fake date thing. And he knows I like someone else so he suggested that we make you jealous so you'll finally take action." You blinked blankly at her and she just laughed, "He's really nice so you have to apologize to him for giving him a black eye."
You grumbled unhappily but relented, "Fine. I'll say sorry when I see him again."
"Good."
"Are we okay then?" you asked hesitantly, because although you both had confessed your mutual feelings and had even shared an intimate moment, you had to be sure. "I mean, are we..."
Her only response was to hug you, and it was enough to tell you that you were.
You soaked up the feeling of her arms around your torso to assure yourself that this was real. And as your heart pounded louder, you wondered if she could hear it as she pressed her ear against your chest.
"Oh, and Touma?"
And the warmth from her body as you embraced her back made you feel as if she was yours.
"I love you too."
And at that moment, she truly was.
–
–
–
You were 26, and she was 24 when you proposed to her.
You had purchased the ring you would use more than a year before you presented it to her but never really felt ready to do it. It wasn't that you were hesitant—because there was nothing in this world that you were more sure of than Mikoto—but even with all the years you spent as lovers, and even more spent as friends, there was an illogical part of you that kept thinking she might say no, not because she didn't want to marry you but because she might think you two were going too fast.
It did take you almost five years before you got together so if that wasn't taking things slow, then you didn't know what is.
You then asked her parents for her hand. Misuzu-san had always voiced her opinion about you dating her only daughter and often times teased you and Mikoto so it had not been a surprise that she agreed so readily. Tabigake-san, on the other hand, had given you the most frightening glare you had ever witnessed and demanded to know your reasons. You almost peed yourself but you stood your ground, swallowing the fear and thinking this was all for her, and finally managed to tell him how much you cared about their daughter and that you would take care of her and love her for as long as long as you may live.
Maybe it was the fact that you didn't break away from his gaze, or that he felt your sheer sincerity in your words, but Tabigake-san broke out into a grin after your confession and gave you his blessing.
Of course, your parents found out about your plans immediately after that when Misuzu-san spilled the beans to your mother. That made your mother scold your ears off for not telling her sooner, but fortunately, your father was much nicer and had wished you the best instead of telling you off.
That was two months before you asked her to a date—the date where you would propose.
You had asked many of your friends for advice. How should you propose? Would she prefer a big gesture proposal and ask her in public to show her how devoted you are? Or would she rather have a private and quiet dinner proposal with just the two of you?
For some reason, Index was the one you asked. It had been a long time since you two saw each other but you had kept in touch. Even Mikoto had become good friends with her, and they both enjoyed it when they made fun of you together. So when you called her one day with your question, she had been nothing but delighted as she gave you numerous ideas for your wedding ("You and tanpatsu should get married in our church!" "But... we're not even Christians—" "In. Our. Church." "H-hai...") even though you hadn't even decided on how to propose.
You were able to solve that problem though and were able to decide on a proper way to ask Mikoto.
You took her to the park, that particular place where you usually met at when you two were younger, and had even asked Judgment (a personal request to Uiharu-san and Shirai-san, though the latter was a lot more reluctant) to keep the place deserted for the evening. There were no cleaning bots, Anti-Skills or random passersby that would interrupt on your special evening.
You had planned on a simple night picnic with candlelights, some wine and a semi-fancy full course meal that you had intensively learned just for this night. You felt proud of yourself when you finished, and though you were a little nervous, you knew there was nothing to fear. So you searched for the biggest picnic basket you can find and carefully put everything in place, including the small ring box in your right pocket.
Luck, though, hadn't been on your side.
You had rented a car because of how far her current apartment was to the place. You picked her up and took her to the park, but during the drive, a cat suddenly jumped in front of you, making you step on the brake as quickly as you could to avoid it. While the cat had remained unscathed, you later learned that the meal you had prepared had spilled because of the sudden stop, completely ruining everything except for the salad and the desert which containers did not break open.
You felt really dejected, but Mikoto merely waved the whole thing off with a good-natured laugh. You felt a little better at that.
You brought out what was left of our food and laid the cloth down, using the candles you had prepared to weight each corner down. But as your luck would have it, the night turned out to be more windy than you had anticipated that whatever attempt you did to light a candle was easily blown off—quite literally.
But again, she merely smiled, nudging you playfully on your shoulder and complimenting how romantic you were for trying even though your plans had epically failed. You tried to glare at her remark, but her grin was too infectious that you couldn't help but mimic her expression.
You had also forgotten to bring a corkscrew but she was at least able to save the situation by cutting the top of the wine bottle cleanly using her iron sand.
Everything else went pretty well after that. With your cellphones as your candle lights and your mango flavored dessert as dinner, you were glad to realize that she still had fun even after all the mishaps.
After dinner, you two slipped into a simple conversation about your friends, particularly talking about how Shirai-san had finally met her match and found a girlfriend that not only could follow all of her crazy lewd antics but could also set her straight if needed. Mikoto had laughed the whole time she told you about the day Shirai-san had introduce the girl to her, and she had been so amused that you couldn't help but chuckle along with her.
But after your laughs had subsided, you two had settled into a comfortable silence as you laid side by side gazing at the sky. There weren't any stars to look at, and you reprimanded yourself for not thinking of it earlier but she merely shushed you with her lips and said that she didn't mind. The night had been perfect even without the stars.
You felt your heart swell at her words, and as her hand wrapped around your left, you realized that this was it. You were going to ask her to marry you.
You gripped her hand a little tighter as you slipped your right hand into your pocket. You touched the little box for comfort and broke the delicate silence with a soft voice, "Hey, Mikoto?"
"Hm?" she hummed, and when you looked at her, you saw her eyes were closed and there was a peaceful expression on her face.
You were captivated, and all you could think of was how much you want to see that face everyday when you wake up for the rest of your life. "Can I ask you something?" you continued.
She turned to you then, giving you a gentle gaze. "What is it?"
You were about to take the box from your pocket and had your mouth open when you felt droplets hit your face. You stopped at the sensation and looked at the sky, but soon realized how useless that was because it was dark anyway.
But you didn't even need to look because after a short moment, more droplets began to pour.
"Crap, it's raining!" you cursed loudly, scrambling to your feet and quickly helping her up so you two could find a shelter from the rain.
You used the cloth that you had been lying on to protect yourselves from the falling droplets as you ran. The car you had rented was too far from where you had set your date so you led her to the nearest waiting shed instead.
The moment you stepped under the shed, the rain began to pour heavier than before. You were both a little wet from the run but your clothes were still mostly dry. At least you weren't going to get sick.
But even so, you couldn't help glaring at the thing that interrupted the most important event of your life. You scowled at it, as if staring at the pouring rain long enough will make it stop, and grumbled unhappily, "Stupid rain. The forecast said it would be clear skies tonight!"
"The weatherman can be wrong too, Touma," Mikoto said from behind you, wrapping the cloth around her shoulders to keep warm, "And it's just rain. No need to be so mad."
"No, you don't get it. Everything I had planned for tonight got ruined! First, it's the food—"
She interrupted, "The food was delicious."
You kept going, "—then it's the candles."
"We made due with our phones."
"Then the wine bottle—"
"I fixed that."
"—and then the stars—"
"I said all of those were fine."
"And then it rained just when I was about to propose to you. It's like the universe doesn't want me to get engaged!"
"..."
You were too caught up in your rage that you failed to realize what exactly you had said until after several seconds of silence. You froze when you did and slowly turned to look at Mikoto, trying to gauge her expression.
Her eyes were wide in shock and she seemed to have frozen at your statement too. For a long moment, you two merely stared at each other, unsure of what to do or say.
"Y-you..." it was her who broke the silence first, stuttering as she tried to speak, "You were... t-trying to... t-to..."
"Yes," you affirmed before she could ask, looking down at your feet because darn it, this was the worst proposal ever. You felt a little disappointed with yourself but since she already knew, there was no point to even hide it. You dug for your pocket and took out the box, showing it to her but not the contents. "I had everything prepared."
You took a step closer to her, and then another, slowly making your way until you were in front of her. Without looking at her face, you took her hand gently and put the box on her palm, closing her fingers around it. When she took it, you slipped your hands back into your pocket, watching her as she held the box with both hands as if it was a delicate flower.
"Can I open it?" she asked hesitantly and you nodded.
Gingerly, she opened the little box and gasped as the ring you had bought was revealed. It was simple silver band that had a little lightning bolt serving as the connection for the two ends. The lightning bolt had tiny diamonds studded along it, and they glimmered lightly as she ran her thumb along the stones. The lady at the jewelry store where you bought it had called it a 'Patronus Ring' which apparently had some significant meaning but you couldn't recall.
You wouldn't tell her but the moment you saw the ring, you had immediately thought of her.
You wouldn't tell her but that was the moment you realized you wanted to marry her.
When her silence had become too much for you, you called out to her softly, "Mikoto?"
"Can you do it?"
You blinked at her sudden question, not comprehending what she was talking about, "What?"
She handed the opened box back to you and said, "Can you propose to me right now?" she asked, but then began to blush, "I-I mean... d-do... do you still want to? If you do, then you can a-ask me and..."
You smiled at her words and took her hand to stop her rambling and grab her attention. She gazed back at you with hopeful eyes and without letting her hand go, you slowly knelt on one knee and said, "Will you marry me?"
"Yes," she choked as tears quickly formed in her eyes. She tried to wipe them hastily but failed, letting the salty droplets run down her cheeks as she repeated, "Yes, I'll marry you!" she declared before tackling you into a hug even before you could stand.
And at that moment, everything felt right in your world as you slipped into her finger the ring that made her yours forever.
fin
Author's Notes:
Whoa! you actually made it down here? wow! I applaud you for conquering my longest chapter ever posted XD I could have divided it into parts per chapter, also being able to post it earlier and maybe get more chance to get this story known but it didn't feel right to do so. It's a one-shot, no matter how long it is, because i feel that it'll just ruin the whole thing if i made it multi chaptered. so... no XD
this may not be the first time i tried 2nd person but it's definitely the first story in 2nd person that i published! i think it turned out rather well… i hope. But anyway, exploring new ways of writing is fun! so long as it's still basic fluff haha! well, does this count as fluff? XD
I'm really pleased with this, especially because it's so long XD and I guess I'm also sending out the message about relationships. Just because you like each other doesn't mean you're gonna end up together. Everything else has to be right. You both have to be mature enough for a relationship, you need to get the timing right, and of course, communication is vital. So don't do what Touma did here XDDD especially the one where he punched a guy. He was in the wrong there. seriously hahaha
the ending is a little too cheesy for me and it's making me cringe XD but meh, i like the last line hahaha but yeah, OOC Touma is good Touma. But remember, there are years of character development that was barely touched here so i hope it at least makes sense that he's like that haha and Mikoto! Where do I even start? I hope there are still hints of her tsundere nature even after a full decade. I didn't want her to completely outgrow that
and yes, if you haven't noticed, the whole story took place over about a decade and forever was in the last line and hence, the title XD gotta thank my sister for that. Kudos wherever you're posting your stories!
Speaking of which, I have to admit, this story was greatly inspired by my older sister's own short story. The whole "You were this age and he was this age when this happened" format was just sooooo goooood and I couldn't help but mimic it. Of course, I got her permission and apart from those lines, there are almost no similarities between our stories. So i hope i won't get arrested for plagiarism XD
Shout out to GreatSnapper who gave countless ideas and edited this thing! XD wouldn't have finished this without you! Also to Cun-sama who helped as well! :D you guys are awesome! Also reference to Cun-sama's story, Thunderfluff and Lightning. That one picture on the potential girlfriend list under Kongou-san where the two girls were stuck at a bus stop XDD yeah, to those who noticed that, awesome! hahaif you haven't read the story I suggest that you do. it's adorable :))
by the way, I have a poll on my profile so please vote on what i should update next! it may not completely determine which i will update but it will let me know what story i should focus on :)
Did you like this story? Then please leave a Review or a Favorite! It helps me a lot :D and if you really liked it, please share it to your fellow Kamikoto shippers. hopefully, we can inspire more people to write X)
Anyone who plays Dengeki Bunko here? XDD I suck at it
Hope I'll see you guys again in the future~
~61wisampa
