"Because," Neji smiled, blood running down from his mouth to his chin. "I was called a genius."
Tenten wanted to scream, but nothing came out of her mouth. Suddenly she couldn't breathe, her lungs demanding angrily for air and finally, her eyes flew open.
She panted, feeling relieved that at least she could still breathe. She could hear her heart hammer inside her chest and her head pound painfully. Cold sweat rolled down her temples.
"Neji…"
"Why are you crying?"
Tenten looked away. She hated this. She'd only cried a few times since she'd become a ninja. She hadn't cried when she'd gotten the most painful injury in one of her missions back then. She hadn't cried when in a winter, she'd been sick alone in her apartment, in the middle of a stormy night, with no one there to take care of her.
She hadn't even cried when Neji had died.
She blinked repeatedly, trying to take her surroundings in the darkness with wide eyes. She was in her room, unharmed, alone. The space beside her was empty.
Neji.
She bit her lips to stop herself from calling out his name. Ever since they had married three weeks ago, those nightmares had been haunting her almost every night. The memory of Neji when he had died in Naruto's arms in order to protect him and Hinata…
Tenten closed her eyes to prevent tears from falling. Neji never knew that she'd been suffering from the same nightmare recently, for she never woke him up when it came. And whenever Neji wasn't home at night due to missions, the dreams always felt more real. As if she came back to that day. The day when she hadn't even cried for the terrible agony in her heart.
She shivered and tried to get out of the bed. She needed cold water to calm herself. Adjusting her nightgown, she walked in the dark to the door that led to the kitchen.
She'd tried her best to keep her focus on the war in front of her eyes when Neji had passed away. She'd even tried to console Lee when the bowl haired man had mourned over Neji's lifeless body in his arms. She had tried to be strong all this time.
People always said that she, Tenten, the Weapon Mistress of Konoha wasn't a weak woman, after all.
However, she couldn't keep her tears at bay when she saw Neji – an alive Neji – sit on a large futon, watching her with those pale eyes she'd missed.
However, she was shivering uncontrollably, making the glass she'd taken from the cupboard suddenly slip from her hand, falling to the floor with a loud shattering sound, breaking the silence of the kitchen.
That was when she couldn't help but sink herself to the floor as well. She was pathetic, she knew it.
"Neji…"
She sobbed loudly, hugging herself to keep her body from shattering like the glass. Her heart clenched and she was sure she was going to break into million pieces before a familiar voice made her stiffen.
They were in a tent, just the two of them. Tenten hadn't been there to watch Neji's revival. She'd decided to visit him when he was alone, because she'd gotten somehow unpleasant feelings about this.
She was true; she felt her tears roll down her cheeks the moment she knelt beside him. Even though he was alive and he was fine.
Strange thing was, she hadn't cried when he'd gone, she did cry when he came back to life instead.
"Tenten."
"Tenten."
She felt a pair of arms around her petite body, crushing her to a solid chest. Her tearful brown eyes widened.
"Tenten? What happened?"
She pulled away and looked up to see a pair of white eyes observe her carefully. "Neji."
Neji rubbed her arms up and down. "What's wrong? Why are you crying?"
She bit her lips. "I-I…"
He stared at her, patiently waiting for an answer.
And she couldn't tell him. She couldn't tell him that the past few weeks she'd been attacked by various nightmares. All of them consisted of Neji, blood running down his chin; empty, unfocused, half-closed white eyes; the fading curse mark…
She shut her eyes, praying that she didn't look weak in front of him. But no, the silent tears kept falling down, the buried emotions deep inside her wrenching her heart painfully.
"Tenten."
She could hear it.
This time, she let out a sob and didn't even try to muffle it with her hand. She could hear her own pathetic, desperate, and heartbreaking cries. She hated it.
A pair of strong arms encircled her body, pulling her into a source of warmth. Her shoulders shook greatly, her fingers unconsciously clenching what she thought were locks of his hair.
"Tenten?"
She couldn't tell him. She shook her head. "I'm fine. I'm sorry."
"You're not fine." Neji stated firmly. He wiped away some tears on her cheeks with his thumbs, smooth eyebrows furrowing in concern. "I can help you. Tell me what's wrong."
She shook her head, smiling a little – a forced one, she knew he knew it. "Just… just stay. Please."
He just watched her with those magnificent eyes, until she took a deep breath and leaned forward to kiss him.
"Tenten." There was that familiar, deep voice again. "Tenten, I'm here."
She slowly opened her eyes and pulled away a bit to meet a pair of white eyes. The white eyes she'd secretly admired in all the years they had been together.
He murmured again, reassuringly, in a comforting tone – she hadn't known he could speak that way – when she only stared at him with wide, tearful eyes. "It's alright. We're fine."
She didn't know how they ended up in their bed. She also forgot to ask why he was home already. She didn't want to feel anything other than his warm hands on her skin, his soft lips on hers, and his thick hair in her grips.
She could feel his heartbeat when she glided her hands along his chest, could see the look of want, need and love in his usually emotionless eyes, and hear his raspy breathing. She cradled his face in both hands, loving the way his hair clung to his unmarked forehead and the feel of his bare back on her fingertips. She loved how he always prioritized her over himself, always making sure he wasn't the one who enjoyed every little thing.
He was always capable to erase the horrible memories from her mind.
And Tenten's heart ached desperately with denied feelings she'd hidden deeply when he gazed at her, the look in his eyes displaying some emotions she'd almost never seen before.
The flash of terrible memory about him dying in Naruto's arms vanished, replaced with unexplained colors.
Tenten panted, watching Neji above her with half-lidded eyes. Neji's lips curled upwards as he leaned down to kiss her. She didn't return the kiss, not because she didn't want to, but because she had no energy left to even move her lips.
Neji, who looked amused, seemed to understand this as he pressed his lips to her forehead gently, before rolling onto his side and pulling her to his chest.
"Thank you," he said quietly. He never forgot to thank her after their lovemaking.
Tenten smiled, feeling his fingers comb her tangled brown hair. "Hm."
He was silent for a moment. "I couldn't stop thinking about you in the mission. That's why I came back earlier than the others."
She looked up at him in confusion. Hyuuga Neji would never leave a mission only to see a woman he missed, even if the woman was his wife. "Why?"
"Neji…" She clutched his shoulders tightly before burying her face in his chest again, sobbing although not as loud as before. She could hear his regular heartbeat through his chest and his breath caress the top of her head. She relished the fact that he was alive, he was breathing, he was here, he was holding her.
"I'm alive, Tenten. We're both alive."
"I don't know," he answered, his eyes focused on the curtained window behind her. "I had a nightmare."
"W-what nightmare?"
He looked at her. "But it doesn't matter now. You're always here with me."
Her brown eyes widened. Whatever his nightmare was about, now she knew she wasn't the only one who was scared to lose the one she loved so deeply. After all, Neji was trying to be optimistic despite the knowledge that shinobi life was dangerous, that sooner or later they were going to die forever. And she could only hope that fate would let they die together, someday.
It didn't matter if she was vulnerable because she knew Neji was, too.
"I always will, Neji. And you, too."
He didn't reply, but she could feel his smile.
As the sun started rising, in his strong arms she drifted off to a peaceful dream, the one involving Neji but not like the previous nightmares. Instead, in this dream she was lying beside him, their fingers interlaced together. She turned her head to see his handsome face, blood streaming down his chin. His skin looked even paler and his eyes lost the light. He smiled at her, and she smiled back, tasting her own blood on her tongue and knowing she also had the same condition as him, ready to go together.
They could hear the sound of a bird flap its wings before a white feather fell down slowly to their joined hands. They were going to fly together.
She didn't mind dreaming of Neji's death, as long as in that dream she also died next to him.
"Yes." She whispered shakily, but a smile curved on her dry lips. "We're alive."
Because people had been wrong all this time. The cheerful, vigorous, energetic Tenten could also be broken sometimes.
Only Neji could understand that.
Because if Neji wanted to fly as a free bird, Tenten would gladly fly with him.
Please don't ask me who the hell revived Neji and how on earth he married Tenten afterward. This is a happy ending version of NejiTen's life. This is just what I want to happen, however, I do know very well that this will remain as a dream only.
I've just watched Naruto episode 364-365 for the first time and needed tissues. How could a Neji lover not weep watching these episodes? (Tenten's reaction only makes it worse. She is strong, I know, but she is still a woman and I know what women are like). And Naruto almost ends while Neji is still lying lifelessly on the ground. What I think is, NejiTen fans have dwindled since Neji's death, and after Naruto ends, probably only a few will be left. I've been stalking through NejiTen communities in Livejournal, Naruto Forums, and Deviantart, and none of those is still active as they were a few years ago until the end of 2012.
Those who said 2012 was going to be the end of the world were probably right.
Arrrghhh! Seriously, Neji, do I have to KISS you so that you will wake up again just like what the Prince Charming did to Snow White?! Oh well, you probably don't want me and choose Tenten to kiss you instead?!
Naruto will end shortly after this story published, and if until that time he won't wake up… well, I'll try to be mature enough to know there's nothing else I can do.
I apologize for ranting, it's not my fault Neji is too amazing that I have to love him. Blame Kishimoto instead.
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