On Your Way Down, a harry potter fanfic

On Your Way Down

A/N : Best is read with the song Fall Your Way by Pete Murray - Lyrics are in bold and italics throughout the fic.

As always, big hugs and thanks to Lbandoly for her work as beta on this. Girly sometimes I don't know how I write without you.

Can you tell me when
Are you going to realize
That you can depend
On you instincts or your alibis

"Sodding hell Ginny, when are you gonna see that we want the same thing. I know it's not easy, but you've got me. But more importantly you can depend on yourself. You are the most resourceful witch I know."

She stared him down, frustrated and tired. "I'm not Hermione. I don't know everything there is to know."

"I never said you were anything like that mudblood."

"Stop right there. Don't call her that. I've asked you not to."

He cut her off. "Fine, but you're still not listening to me. You never listen; not to me, not your mum and dad, not to your Weasel brother, not to Granger, not even to St. Potter. They all know your one hell of a witch, but still you don't listen."

"Draco."

"No, stop, you're gonna listen this time if I have to cast the Impirus on you to get you sit still and keep you bloody gob shut for a change. So sit before I do something to get myself tossed into Azkaban. Do you think you can do that?"

Ginny tossed herself onto the sofa in a huff. She'd known Draco long enough now to know he was never gonna let her out of this room till she had at least heard him out. She also knew his threat wasn't idle. He would do what it took to make her listen even if it took some less than honest tactics to do so. Truthfully it was more likely he would keep at it till she had agreed that he was correct and she was grievously wrong.

Do you play by the rules
Of these games being led by so many fools
You ignore the system that were in
Cause you believe your to good to commit sin

"We've all fought the same war, been played by the same puppet masters, and hurt in the end. But it's over Ginny. We are no one's fools anymore, except maybe yours."

He stopped and thought for a moment.

"Gin I know your scared. Your have these asinine rules that seem to dictate your life. You ignore anything and everything that doesn't fit perfectly inside your boxed in view. It's almost as if you're afraid you'll commit some grievous sin if you do. Or rather that you're too good, too perfect to ever commit such a sin to begin with."

When you notice it's only in your head
When you could justify yourself
To your friends they'll help you when you fall
Cause my friend your about to hit the floor
Your falling your way down to the floor

"Draco I don't think that at all."

"You do a fair job at acting as if you are. But that's it isn't. It's all an act."

"It's not that, Draco, really its not."

"No I guess its not. It's all in your pretty little fiery head and I suspect that you know that at times. But you justify your actions to yourself so you don't have to do so to others. After all if you fall from your false perfection you have a host of people to pick you up. But you don't like the idea of anyone having to pick you up to begin with do you?" He stopped and squatted between her knees.

"The thing is Ginny you can't remain perfect forever. You're gonna topple off your ivory tower and baby when you do your going to hit the ground hard. Merlin sometimes I think you're already falling."

Can you tell me when
You lie into your girlfriends eyes
Does your blood run through your thighs
Instead of drilling pins and needles up your spine

He stood back up and began pacing in front of her without looking at her. She had started crying soft, quiet tears. Those always broke his resolve. He just couldn't sit and watch her. So he paced, keeping his eyes fixed firmly on the path before him.

"Does it make you feel good to lie to all of us Gin?"

"I'm not lying Draco."

"Of course you are. You lie to your friends, you lie to perfect strangers, and you lie to yourself. You hide your imperfections behinds delusions of happiness and functionality. God Ginny does it give you a secret thrill to think we don't see the shimmering wall of deceit you've built around yourself?"

Can't you see the mess your in
Don't you care don't care at all

Her tears morphed into racking sobs, intermittent with the occasional hiccup. "I have to wonder if you even know that your web of lies is falling apart. You don't seem to see the mess you've made. Hell, I don't think you even care now that I'm out right telling you.

You're so into your own life
That you don't care who else is in strife
When your friends all wanna come along
Then you realize what the hell went wrong

Fearing he had pushed her too far and that it would serve only to push her farther away he sat down and pulled her into his lap, wrapping his strong arms around her middle.

"I know that whatever has caused you to build this facade around your heart must have been hard on you and possibly worse on those you love. But Ginny hiding behind the lies doesn't stop those things from happening to you."

Her sobs tapered off into silent tears soaking his shirt.

"You hide behind this created reality thinking you will be safer or we'll be safer if we don't know what's hurting you. But in the same breath you tune out all the shit that is happening to those you love.

Do you even know that Ron's been cheating on Hermione for well on a year and with a man no less? Hermione knows but she can't bring herself to leave him. Add to it the fact that Hermione hates her job at St. Mungo's but refuses to take the apprenticeship that Snape offered her. I haven't figured out why she won't take it, but I'm sure it's something personal between Snape and her that she doesn't want to face. She's been taking lessons from you I guess.

Then there is Potter. He's just a mess all around. Can't decide on anything from what do with his life to how to take his morning coffee. Guess that's what happens when you play puppet to a master for so long. You lose the ability to make even the simplest decision without second guessing yourself.

I could keep going Ginny. I know more about your family and your friends than you have known in years. I don't even like most of them but still I know who is going through what.

I pity you when you figure out when and where it all went wrong cause by then you'll see it all turned sour for everyone. Hiding behind your bravado didn't save them and surely it won't save you."

Her tears turned to the occasional hiccup.

"Ginny?"

"Yes?"

"You know that the floor is rising fast don't you? I'm not just telling you this for personal reasons. You need to know before it all spins out of control."

"I do now. Maybe I always did." She lifted her face to look him in the eyes for the first time since this outburst had begun. "Will you be at the bottom when I crash?"

"You know I will."

"Draco?"

"Hum?"

"When did you start loving me?"

"When I discovered you weren't perfect."

"That's good."

"Why do you say that?"

"Cause I've never been perfect."

He smiled. "Are you ever gonna tell me what made you into this shell to begin with?"

"When I crash."

"This is older than us isn't it? You've been hiding yourself for a very long time haven't you?"

"I was eleven when it started. I needed it then."

"And now?"

"…And now I've got you to protect me, catch me, and love me don't I?"

"I've already said you did more than once."

"Then I guess I don't need the walls anymore."