Disclaimer: I do not own Fairly OddParents.

Title: For Your Entertainment

Authors: unknown20troper & Decepti-Kitty

Rated: R

Warnings: there definitely will be male/male smut, including foreplay, anal, oral, and handjobs

Pairing(s): Norm the Genie/Juandissimo

Summary: Juandissimo claims to be sexy. Norm makes a bet with him. Fairy Idol AU.

Notes: Co-written with Decepti-Kitty. This fanfic was originally a RP that we were doing by PM. Constructive criticism welcomed.

Chapter 1:

"Hey, dude," said Norm to Juandissimo sharply. "You can't possibly be that sexy. Too sexy for your sexy? Oh, please, dude. I'm the one who's too sexy for his sexy. If you are sexier than me, that'll just bias the voters. Honestly, if you are, they don't need to be told. So, dude, I have a bet. We see whose sexier by, well, shagging. If I win, you have to do whatever I tell you to, and if I win Fairy Idol, I'll make you my godparenting partner. Of course, you'll be the only one godparenting. If you win, I'll have to godparent the kid, while you have fun wherever or something. I'll have to do whatever you tell me to, too, of course."

He'd GONGed them both into a dark corner near the stage, where no one could see them.

-

Juandissimo blinked at the genie. "You have no idea what you are getting into, mi amigo." He crossed his arms, trying to hide the fact that he was slightly intimidated by the other man. "You are not sexier than Juandissimo Magnifico. No one is!" He started thinking about how he had lost Wanda to a moron who WASN'T as sexy as him, and became annoyed. He thought about what Norm was offering. "Fine. Deal."

"No one's sexier than me, either," replied Norm. "So, since you're smaller, you'll bottom first. Then, after that's done, you'll somehow top me. We'll do all basic sex acts - foreplay, intense kissing, blowjobs, handjobs, anal and so on. And we'll seal the deal with a kiss."

Norm caught Juandissimo's mouth in an intense kiss, and waited for the muscled fairy to respond. The fairy's eyes widened in suprise. He placed his hands on the genie's chest, intending to push him away. But, a deal's a deal. Juandissimo started to kiss back, wrapping his arms around Norm's neck.

The fairy kissed well. It swept Norm away, till he almost forgot why the heck he was doing it in the first place. Then, he managed to remember, and tried to hide the ecstasy that the sensation caused.

He GONGed off Juandissimo's shirt, even though he knew that the fairy made a habit of ripping it to display his - he couldn't believe he was admitting it, even to himself - well-muscled chest, which reminded the genie of some statues he saw in Greece, thousands of years ago.

Juandissimo hated to admit it, but he was enjoying this. He didn't exactly want to give the genie the satisfaction of this fact. The fairy glanced over his shoulder. "There are others around here. All it takes is some witless idiot, or Cosmo, to walk by and ruin it. I'm not sure I'm okay with a ruined reputation. Are you?"

"I'm a 'filthy' genie," replied Norm. "I'd say my reputation is already ruined. So, yeah, I'm okay with it. You know, if you refuse, that won't stop me. You already sealed the deal, remember?"

He skimmed his fingers over Juandissimo's muscles, resuming the kiss as he did so.

Juandissimo moaned at the genie's touch. Well, he DID seal the deal, and the fairy wasn't too keen on this whole situation ending in rape and him losing the bet. While winning against a 'filthy' genie would be great, it wasn't likely. Genies are tricky creatures and Juandissimo knew to be careful. Though the genie's actions made it difficult to dislike him...

Norm GONGed off his own garments, taking one hand off Juandissimo's chiseled chest to do so. He swiftly returned to fondling the fairy's muscles. Admittedly, the fairy was significantly smaller than him, which in the genie's opinion, slightly diminished the attractiveness of his muscles, but that barely diminished his enjoyment too much.

Juandissimo glanced around again. "What if we get caught? It could ruin our chance at winning." The fairy wasn't very uncertain about this whole situation, but he couldn't deny that he liked it. He decided to ignore his own comment and kissed the genie.

Norm frowned. He hadn't considered that. Now, that the issue was raised, he couldn't help but question his decision. Couldn't he just win the normal way?

"Okay, okay," replied Norm, breaking off the kiss. "We'll stop!"

He GONGed their clothes back on.

Juandissimo sighed. Not in relief, it was more disappointment. "We will keep the winning part of the deal. You win, I will be your partner and we can do whatever you wish, mi amigo. If I win, same thing, but of course the roles will be reversed." He smiled. "Is that okay with you?"

"But, how'll we know if we don't shag?" asked Norm. "You kinda ruined the deal there, Narcissism."

The fairy paused. It sounded as if the genie was whining. "How about this: we keep the bet we made but we split it into two separate bets. Would that be better? I am merely tryin to make sure you don't ruin your chance at winning Fairy Idol. I never said that I wouldn't go through with our deal." Juandissimo kissed Norm to prove his point.

"Sure," replied Norm once Juandissimo finished the kiss. "That would be great."

He doubted that Juandissimo actually cared about him. After all, if he won, Juandissimo got what he wanted - a godchild - and if both of them lost, neither would gain one. He hoped his doubt hadn't crept into his voice.

"Don't seem so sad, mi amigo." Juandissimo could tell that the genie was upset. He didn't mean to upset him. "I'll go through with our bet. But, it is better not to jeopardize our chance at victory." He was starting to like the genie, and Juandissimo felt really strange.

"Great," replied Norm, though Juandissimo hadn't addressed his concerns. After all, it wasn't like he could tell the fairy that he didn't trust him, didn't trust anybody.

"To be honest, your actions have... frustrated in me in a very specific way..." Juandissimo pointed out. He paused. "Tell me what is bothering you."

"Sexually, perhaps?" inquired Norm in a coquettish tone. His next words weren't delivered in a coquettish tone however. "Narcissism, nothing is bothering me. Nothing."

He knew that was false, but he also knew that the truth wasn't something he could tell. Instead, he just gave Juandissimo a restrained kiss, far more restrained then he'd do normally, when he didn't fear that it could ruin his chances of winning.

"Yes, in that way." Juandissimo replied. He noticed the kiss was of the 'held back' variety and frowned. "I don't believe you, mi amigo. But, if you don't want to tell me, that is your choice. I did not mean to seem as though I'm trying to back out of our bet, I was merely saying that it could damage our chance at winning. And my name is Juandissimo. I do not believe I got your name."

Norm gave Juandissimo a coquettish look, pleased by the compliment. "I didn't think you were. The deal is too tempting for you to back out of, after all. And dude, I know your name. Narcissism is a nickname." He groaned. "A fitting nickname."

Norm almost told the fairy that his claims were true, to an extent, but stopped himself, knowing that if he did so, it would mean conceding defeat.

"Well, Narcissism, as soon as we win, your frustration will be over!"

He drew Juandissimo into a short, yet intense kiss, since he noticed that the held back one bothered the fairy.

Juandissimo began to kiss back. "I see." The fairy replied, pulling away. He liked the genie's flirty nature. Women fell all over Juandissimo, sure, but Norm's charms were almost too much.

"It better be or you shall suffer my wrath," Juandissimo laughed playfully, lightly shoving the genie's shoulder.

"JUANDISSIMO!" boomed Jorgen. "THE AUDITION IS OVER! I'm about to announce the results!"

Norm groaned. "Narcissism, sorry, but Jarhead's announcing the results of the audition and we need to be there!"

He regretted ending his time with the fairy, even though he'd surely resume it minutes later, since Juandissimo, unlike everyone else, treated him like a being with thoughts and feelings of his own. A being capable of more than causing pleasure, though Juandissimo certainly acknowledge his capabilities at that!

He GONGed them both to the stage.

Juandissimo didn't like Jorgen. He was far too loud and his voice hurt the smaller fairy's ears.

"Very well. If we must..." Juandissimo rolled his eyes in annoyance. He wanted to spend more time with Norm. Even if they both lost, he wanted to hang around the genie anyway, bet or not.

"Cupid, Juandissimo, Pixies-"

"We're Lawn Gnomes, not Pixies!" rapped the Lawn Gnomes in response to Jorgen's mistake.

Jorgen continued. "April Fool, Witched Witch, Tooth Fairy... You're all eliminated!"

Norm cursed under his breath.

Meanwhile, Jorgen spoke, not noticing the genie. "It's now time for the competition! Who will win? Norm, the filthy genie, Cosmo and Wanda, the fairies that are hoping to attain a new godchild, or Sanderson, the Pixie that wants to do something his species has never done before."

Juandissimo sighed. "Well, it seems I have lost this part of our bet, mi amigo." He said softly so that only Norm could hear him.

Wanda floated beside Cosmo, eyeing Norm warily. She was certain the genie would cheat his way to victory. She frowned. She couldn't help but noticed how close Juandissimo was floating to the genie. What was going on?

Norm sighed, and gave Juandissimo a kiss, hoping that the fairy would stay near him. He noticed Wanda's stare, but attempted to ignore it.

Next came Sanderson, who sang a variation of the Pixies' typical rap. Norm didn't particularly like the song, and he hoped no one else would either. Almost all the judges scathingly criticized Sanderson. The one that didn't, Binky Abdul, just said, "You're smart," to Sanderson, which earned him several glares from the audience.

"NORM! YOU'RE NEXT!"

Juandissimo found a seat in the audience, waiting for Norm to perform. And win. The fairy was sure that the handsome genie would win. Wait... 'Handsome'? Juandissimo shook his head. Norm wasn't sexier than him. Was he?

Wanda twitched. Did Norm just kiss Juandissimo? "What the?" She murmured, deeply confused.

Cosmo, as usual was oblivious to what was bothering Wanda and instead was wondering if he'd ever see Phillip the Nickel again.

Norm floated onto the stage in his typical casual confident manner, trying to ignore the high stakes of this competition. He gazed over at Juandissimo, wondering if they'd be able to do the second bet, hoping that they would. He took a breath, and then let it out, while reminding himself of the full extent of his awesomeness.

Jorgen complimented him, slipping a species-based insult in there as well. Norm responded by confidently stating his intentions - except for the bet with Juandissimo and his plans for revenge on Turner. Jorgen asked him why he was interested in the position and the genie's reply was to tell him they'd all be informed of it in song.

A jazz band materialized when Norm snapped his fingers. As soon as they appeared, they began playing the exact tune Norm wanted. He smirked.

Juandissimo smiled. He wasn't a fan of this kind of music, but Norm was making him like it. He knew that the genie would win. Norm HAD to win.

He looked around and saw Wanda give him a glare. Did she see what happened between Norm and Juandissimo? The fairy found himself a bit concerned.

Sitting on a throne - ironically enough - he'd GONGed up, Norm sang, "I'm a swinging G-E-N-I-E! Let me tell you what that spells to me!" He GONGed up a neon sign saying "G-E-N-I-E."

"That I'm shoved in a lamp!" A Mickey Mouse hand then shoved the genie into an illusionary version of his lamp. Norm winced; since even though he'd caused it to happen himself, it still hurt. He blushed, knowing that Juandissimo now knew the embarrassing truth of how he spent his existence. In a lamp; granting the wishes of any mortal that rubbed it. That though he'd lived fifty thousand years, he'd never managed to escape the prison.

"That's cold and damp!" Just then, the water pipes burst and wind came through the hole in the top of the lamp. Norm's clothes stuck to his skin in an uncomfortable way, pasted there by the cold and wet. Even the thought that he'd made this happen in the first place didn't make it any less bothersome. He wondered what thoughts were crossing Juandissimo's mind.

The lamp disappeared. Norm GONGed up the houses of the Three Little Pigs in the vacant space, while singing, "My wishing power stops at three-" The foot of a gigantic wolf loomed over him, and then went down, crushing the genie, as well as all the Little Pigs' houses. "And that's pretty dang annoying to me!"

He spotted Juandissimo in the audience, and grinned. The fairy's full attention seemed to be focused solely on him, in a warm way the genie never saw directed towards him before. A way that strengthened him, made him surer of himself - though he was already pretty confident.

Juandissimo started to feel bad for how Norm spent most of his time, in a stupid lamp. He felt bad that he found Norm's performance funny. Well, it was funny the way the genie was portraying his imprisonment. Juandissimo was trying to give more confidence to the genie, smiling encouragingly

Wanda frowned. "If we can't sing together, what are we going to do?" She turned to her husband, who was no longer there. She looked at Timmy. "I'm still mad at you."

Timmy crossed his arms and reflected Wanda's frown. Norm's singing was very impressive. How could Cosmo and Wanda beat him?

The scene then changed to fairies granting wishes for their godkids. Norm hid behind a bush, wearing a khaki outfit, and holding a butterfly net. He sang,"I want that crazy power that you fairies got! To grant those wishes that you grant lot!" He smirked to himself about the irony that the smarter members of the audience may have thought was there. Of course, the irony was nonexistent. Genies lacked freedom; fairies possessed it, though Da Rules certainly restrained them. But, when it came to a choice between Da Rules and slavery, he preferred Da Rules. He briefly wondered if Juandissimo thought his intentions selfish, but dismissed the worry.

Then, the scene changed. A balloon of a kid's head, attached to a pump, appeared. "To give every child! A great big smile!" He pumped the balloon, till it exploded. Actually, he planned on ignoring the kid. Of course, he couldn't tell the fairy public that!

"Well, aren't you the frustrated one..." Juandissimo murmured with a smile. The more he watched Norm, the more he realized the ulterior motives the genie had. It made no difference to the fairy. Juandissimo had a feeling that all Norm really wanted was freedom, so he wasn't too offended by the performance. He still was, just not that much. He glanced over at Wanda, who was completely upset. Juandissimo smirked. "You quit. If he wins and everything changes for us fairies because of it, you and your idiot husband are to blame." He paused. Did he really just say that about a woman he was so in love with? He frowned, then shook off the feeling. He took what he had said as a sign he was over Wanda. He preferred a genie over her.

Norm saw Juandissimo smirk at Wanda, saying something that saddened her. He wondered what it was about. Didn't Juandissimo have feelings for Wanda? The notion of Juandissimo feeling any love or lust for Wanda repulsed him, though he had no idea why. However, he continued singing, regardless of his emotional turmoil. "To me this means a lot!" The genie wondered briefly if 'this' was more than his freedom, if it was Juandissimo too, that meant a lot to him. "And it's not an evil plot!" And really, once the first part, the revenge part was done, it wasn't. He wanted to enjoy the world, not destroy it, or cause any other type of harm.

When he saw that Juandissimo still smiled encouragingly, warmly, the genie flashed him a brief smile back, glad to know that his self-centered intentions presented no issues for the fairy. Complete acceptance, complete understanding... Certainly not what he'd expected from the narcissist fairy.

Juandissimo ignored his thoughts of Wanda and turned his focus back to Norm. He enjoyed watching the genie. Norm was very entertaining. He thought back to something he had heard Jorgen say. The Jarhead had called Norm a 'filthy genie'. Juandissimo frowned. Norm had called himself that earlier and it had bothered the fairy. Well, Norm was a genie and tricky, but not 'filthy', at least not in the sense Jorgen meant. Pervert, yes. But not 'filthy'.

The fairy shook his head and went back to watching Norm, looking up in time to see the genie smile at him. He smiled back.

Unfortunately for Norm, his decision to demonstrate the definition of 'evil plot' by exploding several rockets on Jorgen caused the large fairy to chase him. The scene changed to a movie theatre, with Norm on the screen, of course. The genie sang, "Give me the wand! And you'll all see!" Norm knew he'd just go explore the world and ignore his godchild, but, well, the fairy public wouldn't vote for him if they heard of that intention. He gazed back at Juandissimo, glad to glimpse his smile, and entirely willing to reciprocate.

He became enormous, and Jorgen now stood in his hand, beside a poster showing Norm as a fairy. The genie smirked; glad to have Jorgen (literally) in the palm of his head. Voices in the background sang the line, "Give me the wand" and while they sang that line, Norm sang next lyric of his song, "The fairy I'd be!"

He glared on Blonda, since he recalled how she'd been subtly flirting with Juandissimo, and for some reason, that bugged him. A lot. "I'll make you a natural blond!" he sang, squirting hair-dye remover on her light gold locks, which turned a muddy brown. Blonda came after him with a medieval weapon, and he let out the last line of his song before she could hit him with it. "If you give me the wand!"

Juandissimo bursted out laughing at what Norm had done to Jorgen and Blonda. He had liked Wanda, not Blonda. And now he didn't care much for Wanda at all. He tried to stop laughing as much as he could, but it was too funny.

"Wow, he's good," Timmy said, turning to Wanda. "Tricky and untrustworthy, but good!"

Wanda sighed. "Well, I'll have to be better..." A sudden POOF caused Timmy and Wanda to jump. They relaxed when they realized it was Cosmo.

"Allow me!" He announced. "During the first part of the song, I POOFed home and got this!" He held up a videotape.

Timmy stared at the tape blankly. "'How to Sing like Diana DeGarmo'?" He looked at Cosmo in disbelief. "You picked a female voice?!"

Cosmo gave Timmy a slight glare. "Hey! She's number one on the charts! And she's my little Boo!" He leaned over to Wanda and gave her a smile. "I'll take it from here, baby!"

Norm spotted Turner and co. in a corner of the stage. He glared at them. He then gazed over at Juandissimo, and felt better. His resolve to beat the trio of Turner and co. strengthened. He wondered why Juandissimo affected him that way, but decided to focus back on the song. However, Blonda chose to hit him with the spiked weapon at that exact moment. He groaned, hoping he'd feel better soon.

Cosmo POOFed into the throne Norm was previously in and began singing. "I'm a, oh hang on," He pulled out a sign that had the word 'FAIRY' written on it, except the 'R' was backwards. "F-A-I-R-Y!" He continued. "We did our very best for this bucktoothed guy!" He sang, the scene changing to a golf course. He picked up a golf club and POOF Timmy on the tee and swung the club, knocking Timmy across the stage. "That vest wearing slob," Comso went on, floating beside Wanda, holding a cup Timmy had fallen into. "He may want our job!" He said, turning to Wanda.

Norm groaned, and decided to continue singing. "Give me the wand!" He looked at Wanda, saw the expression on her face, and gulped.

Wanda took the golden cup from Cosmo and smashed it over Norm's head.

"Give us one more try," Cosmo continued singing and floated over to the judges with Wanda. "You really can't deny!"

Juandissimo frowned. "Come on, genie. You can win..." He murmured under his breath so that no one could hear him.

Norm winced, blushing, since he knew Juandissimo sat in the audience. He GONGed the golden cup off his head. "Give me the wand!" He then muttered to himself, "Why the heck can't fairies die?" He fervently hoped that none of the fairy public heard that. He continued, "I hope you'll all respond, and give us the wand!" Norm groaned when he realized his mistake, but fixing it wasn't in his power. Now said; impossible to unsay.

Juandissimo noticed that Norm had muttered something. He thought the genie had said something about 'faries dying', which was a bit unsettling for Juandissimo.

Cosmo had started singing in unison with Norm and did a pose at the end of the song.

Wanda had gone back to floating beside Timmy and crossed her arms. "We just have to win..." She murmured.

Norm gazed at Juandissimo, upset by the fairy's worried expression. He thought back to his earlier, rash comment about wanting fairies to die, realizing that must have been why. He floated over to Juandissimo, and gave him a kiss, a sweet and spicy, lusty and loving kiss. "Narcissism, sorry," he said. "Dude, I don't want to kill any fairies, right now. It's just, well, Cosmoron and Wanda, well, were getting on my nerves. Got it, Narcotic?"

"Narcotic? I am not an addictive drug!" Juandissimo said, clearly being playful. "I'm not upset. You wouldn't want to get rid of me. I'm too sexy." He kissed Norm quickly. "Let us hope Jarhead McMuscles announces you as the winner."

Norm smiled at Juandissimo's words. Jorgen began to speak, making him almost jump with fright.

"Contestants. You have all came a long way. But never forget, if you don't win today, you'll always be losers." Norm winced at the large fairy's words, because of the truth contained in them. Jorgen opened a card. "Sanderson. Fairy World has voted and you're not going to be assigned a fairy godchild."

Sanderson protested, rapper slang sounding odd in his flat voice.

Jorgen continued. "Cosmo? Norm? Fairy World has voted... and... Remember, in the event that the fairy cannot fulfill their duty, the first runner up will be appointed as Fairy Godparent..."