Just a little tidbit that popped into my mind. Your Inquisitor-insertable...mostly. Sorry, dudes.
The Inquisitor leaned forward over the war table, studying the arrangement of markers spread there-on, processing the information her advisors had just shared with her. The three of them were waiting patiently for their leader to decide how best to distribute their resources when her eyes were suddenly drawn down. Then the brave, bold Inquisitor launched herself up onto the long oaken surface and let out an ear-splitting shriek that rent the air.
Reactions were immediate. Commander Cullen's hand fell to his blade and he set forward, at the ready. Lady Josephine Montilyet withdrew, turning her clip-board to act as a shield while Sister Leliana's hands came unclasped from behind her back, all three of them on watch for the source of the danger.
"Inquisitor?" the latter asked.
The Inquisitor sat, taut and wide-eyed, her legs elevated high off the ground and out in the air off the war table's edge. "It was there!"
Several inches of Commander Cullen's blade came free as he advanced. "Where? What was it?"
"I felt it. On my foot! Did you see it?!"
"See what?" Lady Montilyet inquired, side-stepping to get a look where the Inquisitor was staring fanatically.
The Inquisitor herself was in such a state that her next word could hardly be made out.
"Spider!"
The atmosphere of the room changed to surprise. And then fell to mirth.
"Shut up! It's not funny! There's a massive tarantula crawling the floor. Stop laughing!"
Lady Montilyet attempted, artfully, to stifle her giggles. "Apologies, Inquisitor." Sister Leliana was more affective. Although she could not stop her eyes from twinkling.
Commander Cullen shook his head in disbelief and returned his blade fully home. "I see nothing," he declared, glancing beneath the table where the offender had doubtless scurried. "Are you sure you weren't just imagining things?"
The Inquisitor glared at him. "I know when I'm imagining things and when a spider is crawling it's way up my leg!"
Lady Montilyet needed to raise a hand to smother her laughter. Sister Leliana looked at her reproachfully and then back to the upset war table. "Perhaps we could continue with what we were discussing. Provided the Inquisitor would disembark-."
The Inquisitor swiveled around and almost shrieked, "I'm not getting down from here! Not while there's a tarantula on the loose!"
Commander Cullen tried not to smirk...and failed. "I'm not so certain we have tarantulas up here in the mountains."
The Inquisitor's glare rounded on him. "Well then find it and convince me!"
The spymaster's eyes twinkled diabolically. "I doubt we could, Inquisitor. If it was there, chances are it has crawled up under the table by now and hidden in one of the joints. It might even be-"
"Ahh!" The Inquisitor scrambled off the table, tearing the Ferelden map in the process, and leapt as far from out and away from it she possibly could, spinning and crouching like she expected an ambush on all sides. The three advisors just stood there trying, with varying degrees of success, to contain their humor.
Sister Leliana cleared her throat and motioned to the map and upset markers. "Inquisitor, while I-"
"Fine!" was the snapped response. "Cullen, deploy Templars to the Wending Wood. Josephine, get Sutherland and his outfitted. Leliana can deal with the Crows." With erratic motions, the Inquisitor lashed her finger at the space under the war table. "And I am not coming back in here until someone finds that damned spider!" With that, the mighty Inquisitor, Herald of Andraste, fled the war room, streaking off in search of safe haven from her tormentor. And perhaps some company more sympathetic to her encounter.
Haha! ...Ew. Spiders. *shudder*