Rating: T (some racy comments)
Disclaimer: I don't own them, yo.
Summary: Drake and Josh have a nice little conversation while Josh is on his lunch break. D/J Slash. Oneshot Fluff.
Author's Note: So, I'm not a complete scatterbrain. For those of you who were wondering why I was posting random one-shots when I have 'Long Live The Car Crash Hearts' to work on, it's really just to get my creative juices flowing. And I don't have many one-shots, so I thought I'd add it to my repertoire. And besides. My beta is nowhere to be found. Which sucks. Anyway, just read and enjoy. To my LLTCCH readers: I'm completely lost without a beta, so if mine doesn't show up within the next couple of days, I'll get a temp, okay? Until then, just hold tight, alright?
Also: It's kind of long. Sorry about that.
Toppings on the Sundae.
Drake:"So, I was wondering…"
Josh:"Wondering?"
"Yeah. I was wondering why…you put up with me."
"Really."
"Yeah, I mean, I know I'm a pain in the ass sometimes—"
"Most of the time."
"Whatever, I just can't seem to find a good enough thing about myself that would make you love me even though I piss you off all the time."
"Well, first of all, I only want you for your body,"
"Naturally."
"Second of all, why isn't just knowing that I love you enough?"
"It is! It is, just…could you answer the question please?"
"If you can give me a legitimate reason, I'll answer the question."
"Ugh. I don't like how the roles have switched between us."
"You mean how I'm the one being witty and difficult, and you're the one being insecure and victimized?"
"…Yes."
"Oh. My. God. Did Drake Parker just admit to being self conscious? Alert the media! The panda bears have just had sex!"
"Panda bears have what? Josh, what the hell-? You know what? I don't even want to know. This is hard enough –"
"Oh shush. You're just mad because I'm the one verbally pinching you. This switch is actually a good thing. It keeps the relationship spicy."
"Spicy? Josh, where do you get this stuff? I mean, really?"
"Mostly from Cosmo –"
"You read Cosmo? That's a little gay, don't you think?"
"You're one to talk, Mr. Do-that-thing-with-your-tongue-again."
"Point taken."
"And besides, Cosmo has these really funny confession articles. Like, this one guy got his—"
"Okay, enough of that. We're talking about me, remember?"
"There's the boy I fell in love with."
"Seriously? You like my hopeless conceitedness?"
"Mhm. There's something annoyingly charming about it. And it's not like you don't have a reason to be as overly confident as you are; I mean, look at you."
"I know right? Ugly people will never understand the ego boost of being beautiful."
"Yeah, that's something we'll never get."
"Shutup. You're cute."
"Sure."
"You are. If you weren't, you wouldn't be allowed to sleep in a room with me. Or sleep with me, for that matter."
"Well, thanks for the privilege."
"This is stupid. You're not ugly. End of discussion. Now answer my damn question."
"You still haven't given me a good enough reason."
"Do you enjoy pushing my buttons?"
"A little."
"...Fine. I'm feeling like I'm not good enough for you."
"Hm."
"Like, you're the best thing to happen to me, but you're settling for me and my crappy personality. You could find someone with a squeaky clean character, you know?"
"You don't think I could find someone better looking, too?"
"...I'm rolling my eyes at you right now."
"Okay, don't pop a vein. And I don't really disagree with it, but I do disagree with this ridiculous notion that you're not good enough for me."
"Well..."
"The main reason I love you, is because you love me. I loved you before—"
"How long before?"
"Since I moved in. But that's another story for another day. What I was saying was I loved you before, but I love you even more now, because I know you love me back. All of your personality flaws are like toppings on the sundae."
"..."
"No one could replace you. I wouldn't let them."
"..."
"Are you crying?"
"...So?"
"Calm down, I think it's cute."
"..."
"..."
"I love you."
"I love you too...Hey, I learned something from Cosmo—"
"Ugh."
"No, wait, hear me out. The article was titled, 'Find your guy's hidden G-spots."
"Really...?"
-Fin
AN:My first attempt at a dialogue based D/J slash fic.
I hope you liked reading it as much as I liked writing it.
Review please!