Diaries of a Firefly

By: Sierra Omega

Notes: Well, it's finally done. This is a sequel to 'Never Again,' and I integrated the song "Otherworld" from Final Fantasy X into it because it seemed to fit perfectly. Let me know what you think… read and review!

KEY: Stars across screen indicate skips in time in regards to journal entries. Three stars (***) refer to a new POV in each passage to avoid confusion.

*******************************************************************************************

March 3, 20XX

It's another day gone flitting past, like those damn butterflies in the grass no one can catch. Like any other day, It's been wasted on endless training exercises… rigorous as all hell.

Pharaoh's been real moody… probably after the loss of Metal Man. I suppose if I lost my lover I'd feel the same. But then, I wouldn't know about such things.

He turned out the dim lights of his room, carelessly tossing the journal aside for the night. Creeping over to the large window next to his bed, he gazed aimlessly outwards to the world that lay beyond the dank and under-kept fortress.

--Go now if you want it… an otherworld awaits you…--

Why weren't they allowed to cross the boundaries of their prison? Wily was an old fool to think that they weren't capable of escaping if they wanted to.

So, why didn't they just leave?

--Don't you give up on it… you bite the hand that feeds you…--

He wanted to talk to someone about these thoughts… but who would listen? Who could possibly understand these confusing questions and actually hope to answer, let alone understand them?

Of course… Shadow. He was different from the other Robot Masters, with his inquisitive and calculating personality… he could quell the uncertainty of his heart! Surely, he would have answers!

His decision made, he ran a hand through his shock of long blond hair to keep it from electric-blue eyes. His door opened with a slow hiss, and with new determination he strode through the long and winding paths into the deepest depths of the dungeons where Shadow Man was known to haunt.

*** Darkness. Oh, how he loved it.

Even more so, he loved his solitude… courtesy of the one he'd been modeled after. A smirk crossed invisibly over his cloaked features in the surrounding void of black. Blues. He'd taught Shadow so much… how to avoid annoyances and the petty discord caused by his fellow Robot Masters… to simply escape them all and be alone.

But still, something was missing. He pondered this often, thoughtfully considering it in a curious and catlike manner. He wasn't in any hurry… the answers would come. They always did, given time.

Just as he began again to roll the subject over in his mind for the third time that night, a creak of rusted metal interrupted his thoughts. Blinking, he leaped to an overhead perch provided by a wooden rafter, a useful vantage point against those who would dare disturb his quiet void.

"You in here, Shadow?" a deep voice asked.

He paused. Why would *he* be here?

"What do you want?" Shadow answered coldly. He saw the intruder clearly now, watching with unclouded eyes. What was it about him that lit up even the darkest recesses of his lair? It was as if a warm, golden glow always surrounded him… and something about that glow induced magnetism from all the other Robot Masters… including himself.

Perhaps it was his innocence, the quietly intelligent and curious personality. But how could such silent naivete light up a room or a dark mood, with his simply being there? Even talks of him managed to lessen the tension of a mood; somehow, he was bright as a lightning bug on a summer's night, both in wits and in aura.

"Where are you?" Elec Man called again.

In response, Shadow fluidly leaped down from above, landing just shy of three feet away from the golden robot. "Right here."

He smiled, just the smallest bit. "I need to talk to you, if you have time."

A snort. "Time. I have all the time in the world."

"I guess that's a yes?" Elec pressed quizzically.

A shrug.

--All alone cold fields you wander… Memories of it cloud your sight…

Fills your dreams, disturbs your slumber… Lost your way like a fallen knight…--

"…so, I was wondering why it was we just stay here if Wily has no hold over us."

"Simple," Shadow replied with a smirk. "They have no place to go, nothing to wish for that goes beyond killing Megaman."

"But why?"

They were reclining comfortably on beds of hay from the dungeons, and Elec sipped on a soda he'd slipped form the mess hall on the way down. Shadow sat upright with legs crossed, leaning back against the wall as he gazed at his companion with interest.

"Because that's the way they were programmed. Philosophy isn't a forte of Wily's in terms of programming, but then insight is something to be gained or discovered, not input. They simply don't understand that there're things beyond their own lives, and lack in complexity merely because they choose to. They don't want to deal with the outside world."

Elec fell silent at these words, and Shadow thought to himself about the experiences Blues had shared with him. Going to the city at night, seeing the people walk the streets beneath the colorful lights… visiting the forest beneath the full moon and casually stargazing, searching for the constellations... he'd loved it all. He knew he was unique in having such memories… but his yearning to reminisce with another about such things was suicide under Wily's iron fist. Blues could no longer come back thanks to the mad doctor… but he still couldn't stop Shadow.

No one could stop what they couldn't see, he thought with a smile. Looking back at Elec Man, he realized how lonely it had been without Blues around. For weeks on end, he'd dream of escaping the fortress with his Kagemusha, his shadow warrior… just for the sake of feeling free. He was lost without him, he realized.

What a fool he'd been. That was what was missing. Emotionless as he'd tried to be, Blues had changed him. He could never forget that.

But why had Elec Man aroused such thoughts in him, he wondered again in amusement. What was it about him?

"Shadow?" the 'bot in question asked in concern. "You okay?"

"Huh?" he responded, blinking. "Oh. Yeah, I'm cool." Slowly, hesitantly, he pulled off his black helmet.

--Hold now aim is steady… an otherworld awaits you

One thousand years, you ready? The otherworld it takes you…--

Elec gasped inwardly as the most distant, most mysterious Robot Master removed the only veil to his identity. Even more surprising was the face that was kept beneath…

The face of Blues…

"S-s-shadow?" he breathed.

"I think I can trust you with this," the other 'bot answered quietly. "Don't ask me why, I don't know myself. But I think you're different from the others. More alive, shall we say." He raised his coal-black eyes to Elec, the only thing that made him different from Blues…

"Come back tomorrow. I want to show you something."

********************************************************************************************************

March 4, 20XX

About to go meet Shadow again. I wonder what he wants to show me? He seemed… different last night than he'd ever been. And his face… he looks so much like Blues! And yet… now that I think about it… they have a lot in common. Even more curious… we have quite a bit in common as well.

Maybe I'll ask him, wherever we're going, how they're linked. Wily was never one to indulge his design secrets. What is it about Shadow that draws me?

Shutting the small book, Elec rose to his feet. Slipping out of his room soundlessly, he walked once more down, down into the haunting grounds of Shadow Man… though this time, the path seemed much faster than before. Just as he reached the dank and dark entry to the cavernous labyrinth, the gates opened before him.

With a start, he jumped back in surprise. His blue eyes widened, then narrowed in confusion as he saw no one on the other side.

"Are you ready?" a voice whispered into his ears. Elec yelped at the sound, but his response was quickly smothered by a hand over his mouth, and a soft chuckle at his side.

"Silly firefly. It's only me."

Elec freed himself from Shadow's grasp easily, glaring at the younger 'bot angrily. "Don't do that again. You frightened me."

Another chuckle. "Oh? The light should never fear darkness, for it cannot live alone. They are one, you see."

A golden eyebrow quirked from curiosity as blue searched coal-black, silently questioning.

Shadow allowed himself a small smile. "You'll understand soon enough." He held out his hand. Looking down at it, Elec hesitantly took it, and felt the glow of a teleporter surround them.

Immediately the whoosh of cool night wind caressed their faces, much to Elec Man's astonishment. He looked at Shadow, who was smiling at him as he began to remove his helmet again.

"Look around you," he said.

And indeed, the golden Robot Master looked. Surrounding them was a vast expanse of grass to one side… and to the other a dense forest of lush dark greenery… and above, he could see the moon in it's full silver glory… the wispy clouds and the flickering stars…

--Go, go into the sand and the dust and the sky… Go now, there's no better plan than to do or to die

Free me, pray to the faith in the face of the light…Feed me, fill me with sin, now get ready to fight…

You know you will…--

"Shadow… it's wonderful! But… why did you bring me here?"

"You wanted out, didn't you? I have the keys, firefly."

A shiver ran down Elec's spine as Shadow's arms wrapped around him from behind.

"I've been so alone…" he continued. "For a long time… I've thought something was missing. I've been cursed with my darkness for seemingly an eternity. You are the light I was searching for, Elec Man."

"I… I don't understand…"

"I think you do…" the dark one purred. "You're the only one who understood the need to be free… who yearned for the chance to be liberated from Wily's grasp, if only for a while. You're the only one who could ever fathom the purity and meaning of this beauty around us, who would want it. Look at the stars."

He did so, raising his clear gaze skyward. Shadow drank in the sight of the one he held with longing, memorizing the perfect profile highlighted by starlight, and golden hair flowing freely about his tanned face and neck. Gently he brushed away a loose lock from the soft cheek, and the blue eyes returned to him.

"The stars must always fight with one another in order to be seen," Shadow explained, as if to a small child, "but at the same time, they work together to battle the darkness in between. But… without that darkness, none of them would be visible, just as the darkness cannot be seen without light."

"So the darkness and light are forever bound, always apart but always together, for they cannot live alone?" Elec finished.

Shadow nodded. "You are my light, firefly. I see that now. Only you can brighten the void of my dungeons, fill my thoughts with something other than my selfish broodings."

Not even Blues could do that… he mused to himself with a small smile. Is that why you never let me get close, dear kagemusha? Because you knew there would be another?

********************************************************************************************************

March 11, 20XX

Another day has passed… with the night to look forward to. Never before have I welcomed darkness… but that was before Shadow.

He has taught me so much… I've seen beyond his emotionless façade… I still don't know all of his past… but I won't force it from him. If there's one thing I know about when dealing with him… it's that you have to be patient. He'll tell me when he's ready… hell, it's more than enough to know he trusts me at all.

He sent me a note earlier today… he had something important to tell me when we saw each other again. I wonder what it is…

He's helped me to upgrade my teleporter so the range goes to our private meeting place outside these foreboding walls. We were almost caught by Gutsman and Pharaoh last night, so we decided it was better if we're not seen together.

*** Shadow awaited at the top of his favorite tree, searching for the telltale golden light that brought with it his firefly. His face was creased with worry, his heart torn with inner turmoil. He was burning to tell Elec Man what was troubling him, but at the same time he didn't want to burden the older Robot Master with such ominous broodings.

No, he told himself grimly, I won't keep it from him. He and he alone has the right to know.

*** Elec Man phased into existence into the familiar fields, and was not surprised to immediately feel the strong arms of Shadow wrap protectively around his waist.

"I've missed you," the dark one murmured into his back, reflexively holding him tighter.

Elec sighed inwardly, but perked up at the apathetic tone of voice Shadow had used. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Do not lie to me."

"Never, firefly… when you are here, nothing else matters."

"Please tell me…"

Shadow pulled away, turning is face to the side so that Elec could not see his pained expression. His gloved hands clenched into tight fists, long hair drifting freely in the strong breeze. After a long and tense silence, he at last responded.

"Wily's given me the call. I'm up next against Megaman."

Elec's sharp intake of breath hit him like a knife to the heart, and he no longer could restrain the tears from escaping tightly shut eyelids…

"But… he can't do that!"

"You know very well that he can, and he has. Blue Boy will be here in a few hours… there'll still be time before the sun comes up."

Both fell silent. They knew it would be a suicide mission… it always was. No one had ever survived fighting Megaman before… but the notion never would make it through Dr. Albert Wily's thick skull… for the old fool was too proud, or too insane, to admit defeat. Thus, he sent his robots to the death each day, only to be shown up again and again by the superior little blue bomber.

Elec's face fell, but Shadow lifted it again with one hand until their gazes locked together.

"I'm not going to let him get the best of me. I can promise you that. I won't die so easily as the others. But until then…" he sighed again, "…until then, let's make the best out of what precious time we have left, my friend."

The other nodded. They continued to stare at one another in silence for a time, merely savoring the moment of being together in their freedom.

********************************************************************************************************

March 12, 20XX

It's time. The sun has yet to rise, but by the stirrings of the other Robot Masters outside this room… I can tell. I can hear the Mets and the Joes humming and whirring past, out to face their foe without ever hoping to come back… but then, they aren't capable of hope.

Shadow… will I ever see you again? I can't bear the thought of you being gone… over these few days I feel closer to you than I've ever been to anyone… and I think I…

No. I won't say it here, in this journal where you will never find it. I have to say it to your face. Right now.

With newfound resolve raging within him, Elec Man donned his armor and ran to the arena where Shadow Man was to wait for Megaman's arrival.

Arena… he thought to himself with a sickened grimace. Are we but toys to Wily? As our father, does he not care that he always sends his creations to a hell-bound trip… an inevitable drowning into oblivion's endless and inescapable waters? Shadow… wait…

His mind raced, as did his heart, as did the feet that carried him to his companion. Faster and faster his pace became, until the point where everything became a colorful blur… he was close now, the batontons were whirring on their mechanical wings in the stalactites above… the spy cameras trained on him even as he sped past… At that point, Elec didn't even care that Wily could see his every move. Let him look. There was nothing to see… other than his desperate effort to save a life he held above his own, the life of one who shared his innermost feelings… his very rebellion against his master.

"Shadow!" he called out. "SHADOW!"

--Fight fight fight… fight fight fight…--

He roared his anxiety into the pit of a cavern that held a gaping maw of stone teeth that could crush him at any time… the void of blackness that lay beyond… He heard the exchanges of plasma fire, the whirr of mechanical joints and muscles as they strained to dodge numerous blasts… cries of agony that pulled Elec Man further… further…

And then… he slammed into a solid wall of steel.

"Whoa there, Elec Man," the tall and bulky form of Gutsman grunted as he picked up the smaller Robot Master. "Where do ya think you're going?"

"Let me through, Guts," the blonde wheezed as he caught his breath, attempting to focus on the absurd colors of Gutsman's armor as they swam before his eyes. "I have to help him!"

"Who, Shadow?" the heavyweight robot chuckled. "He'll be fine."

"No! You don't understand! He can't beat Megaman! I have to--"

"Nuh-uh," Guts shook his head. "No one goes in there. Wily's orders, you know that."

Clenching his fists within the other's grip on his arm, he felt tingles of power surging through him. Gutsman raised an eyebrow in surprise, just as sparks and threads of electricity thrashed as if flailing fish out of water over the blond Robot Master's hands…

"I'm sorry," he said simply, before discharging a powerful shock that engulfed Gutsman in bright lights and a shower of blue and yellow fireworks. In an instant he was down, the abnormally large eyes bulged and rolled back into his head.

"I'm sorry," Elec Man repeated, "But I have to do this."

And with that, he entered the arena.

*** Shadow struggled to keep up with the smaller blue robot, who was dashing all around him in large circles and fired multiple shots at random in order to seek out the warrior's position within the darkness that he called home.

Allowing himself a laugh, Shadow produced a shuriken, the deadly metal throwing star of a ninja, the size of a dinner plate with one hand. Hurling it like a boomerang, it spun into lethal revolutions not unlike a buzz saw while it searched for its target.

To Shadow's delight, Megaman emitted a shrill shriek of suffering pain and the whirling weapon sliced into one arm, ripping through countless circuits and wires and covering itself in black pseudo-blood. The navy-blue Robot Master caught his shuriken effortlessly once it had at last returned to his side… he smelled the dripping oil from his foe's wound… he sensed the fear that the smaller 'bot held within him… and could almost taste his victory in the grotesque sight of the melted limb that was gripped to one side.

"Had enough?" he taunted cruelly, smirking.

His only response was a growl, and the rising hum of a charging plasma blast from the little blue robot's deadly arm cannon.

"So, you've some fight left in you, do you Megaman?" he mocked. "I'm shaking in my boots here…"

*** Elec Man stared in awe as Shadow Man sliced his enemy into a nearly helpless position with a single swift stroke.

I've never seen him fight before, he realized. It's as if he uses the darkness to cloak himself… with that armor he can make himself almost invisible…

He heard his friend poking fun at their enemy, flaunting his confidence for victory. Elec was about to join in the fun, but then something changed. A chill ran down his spine at the determination in Megaman's eyes… how the hatred within the blue orbs grew and grew to the point where it became a distinct aura around his childlike form. Colors swirled about the blue 'bot as he faced Shadow, red and pink and violet and green and orange… until they stopped at last to a gleaming yellow.

Elec gasped. Though not much could be seen over the rising glow of Megaman's plasma cannon… but his enhanced vision discerned a difference in the energy signature… as if the blast was of pure photonic light…

Light…

LIGHT!

"SHADOW!" the blonde Robot Master screeched. "SHUT YOUR EYES!"

*** The warning struck Shadow Man like ice water to a sleeping human, but as he turned to face Elec Man who stood in a corner of the arena, a blinding flash of heat and light showered him. He screamed in agony as he lost eyesight in both eyes, falling on the ground in a sudden loss of balance.

"Shadow!" he heard Elec Man call.

"Stay back!" he yelled back hoarsely. "I can still take him!"

Another flash of heat scorched his armor, melting his shuriken into a useless pile of blunt scrap metal…

And again… now his helmet was beginning to warm up intensely… his head hurt…

And again… he could no longer feel his legs… was it the end?

*** He watched the relentless, ruthless and cruel slaughter of Shadow Man in a growing insanity of helplessness. What could he do? How could he save him?

On instinct, he began to run to his fallen comrade, but not before Megaman blasted him with the heat wave weapon. Just in time, the Robot Master shielded his eyes and dodged to escape some, but not the brunt of the blast. He cried out as he tripped, but threw himself back onto shaky feet while continuing to sprint to the aid of Shadow…

--Hope dies and you wonder… the otherworld it makes you…--

*** He groped blindly at his surroundings, trying desperately to regain a way to move. However, the actions only further irritated Shadow's deep burns and wounds, much to his despair.

"It's over!" Megaman yelled triumphantly, and the hum of his cannon could be heard echoing through the halls and vast emptiness of the arena as he fired… fired…

Scream. A single, hollering, agonized, blood curdling, hell-freezing cry was all he could sense around him… so intense it was tangible… but who was screaming? He didn't know anymore…

Something fell near him; the loud clank of hollow metal upon metal ringing in his sensitive ears… was Megaman defeated? Was he defeated?

Suddenly his backup systems kicked in, and vision began to return. At first, he could only see black, red and yellow… floating shapes of the bright colors… then the colors began to move slightly in unison, followed by a heavy groan, and Shadow gasped as he realized who had been struck by Megaman's deadly fire…

"Elec Man!" Struggling, he inched over bit by bit to the older Robot Master's side, clutching his shoulders in his bloodied hands and shaking him. "Elec Man!"

A cough, a gasp, and clear blue eyes opened to meet his coal-black twin pools. "Shadow…"

"Hush," he scolded. "I've gotta get you to the infirmary…"

But Elec Man sadly shook his head. "Too late… Megaman fired… a power shot… and escaped before his side of the arena exploded… it's going to come down any minute now…"

"Then I'll have to get you out! Now shut up and come on!"

"You can't crawl out and carry me at once… just go, Shadow."

"I'm not leaving you here!"

--Dreams they rip asunder… the otherworld, it hates you…--

"Y'know…" Elec murmured almost inaudibly, "Ever since I went to see you that one night… my whole life changed… for the first time… I was free. Free, Shadow… just like you are. Just as you'll always be."

"Quit talking like that!" the nay-blue robot replied quickly. "You're gonna be all right…" he lifted the blonde up to a sitting position, cursing his sluggish limbs for disobeying his brain's commands.

"Kage… please…"

He stopped, stared down at the fallen one with wide eyes. Did he just say…?

Elec Man smiled. "It suits you… 'Kage'… one who is of shadows and darkness. It's perfect… just like you."

"Firefly…" Shadow stammered. "I…"

"Shh," the other responded. "Listen to me… I wanted to tell you something…"

"No time, gotta get you some help… GUTSMAN!"

The blonde chuckled. "Don't… bother… I deactivated him… he's unconscious…"

Shadow looked down at him in surprise, earning him a genuine smile and a small blush that crawled over the tanned face and added a sparkle to the blank blue eyes… and he understood. He'd done it for him. To save him.

At this realization, Shadow felt warmth traveling down his cheeks. Raising a hand to his face, he found tears flowing freely… just as they had done when…

…When Blues had died.

No! He screamed to himself… I'm not going to let another die! Hurriedly he gathered Elec Man into his arms, cradling the tall form safely to his chestplate and rising shakily to determined but weak feet.

He's gonna be fine… he's gonna be fine…

"HELP!" he cried out. "SOMEBODY!"

But he found the halls to be emptied completely. Scattered remnants of Mets and Joes littered the rocky ground… even Gutsman had been dragged out, leaving the two of them alone against Megaman. Cursing, Shadow trudged forward, throwing his back against the walls for leverage. A small moan escaped Elec Man's lips, and he stopped instantly to tend to him.

"Kage…"

"We're almost there, Elec. Just hang on…" However… even as he spoke those words he could see the life draining without stop from the other's limp body, the face losing it's handsome color and the eyes he admired so much fading to dead black.

"Elec! Elec!"

The Robot Master smiled within Shadow's arms. "It's all right, Kage… I always wanted… to be in your arms… like this… it's comfortable…"

"No… no… no…" the other sobbed, shaking his head as if in defiance of the inevitable…

"Don't cry… you'll never… be alone again… because…"

"Please… dear Firefly… please… don't go… "

But even as he pled, the dying breaths were at hand.

--Free now, ride up on it… Up to the heights, it takes you…--

"I love you Kage…"

And then he was gone, forever.

"NOOOOOOO!" the scream was his own this time; a lifeless and animalistic howl of rage and suffering that shook the walls and broken the stalactites from their grip upon the ceiling above… and left Shadow Man feeling as empty as if all of his programming had been wiped… though infinitely many times worse. His twin rivulets of pain-wracked tears streamed down his broken features to fall upon his beloved's now-dead form… the body that would never smile again… would never laugh… would never ask him questions about the moon and the stars as they sat upon the grass to ponder the universe at night.

Hesitant, Shadow blankly brushed away the stray strands of golden hair from Elec Man's peaceful face, lightly stroking one cheek as he did so.

Good bye… until we meet again…

Upon escaping the crumbling arena with barely any time to spare, Shadow walked the halls to Elec Man's room in a daze, carelessly avoiding the questions of any Robot Master who attempted to stop his journey. He had encountered them with grim rage, and the smallest growl that escaped his lips sent even Magnet Man fleeing in fear of his wrath.

You're home now, firefly, he thought. The door was activated by vocal password, but Shadow Man didn't need to try in order to guess the correct code.

"Kagemusha."

The door slid open soundlessly, and Shadow kept the silence as he stepped up to Elec Man's unkempt bed to tuck his cold body beneath the wrinkled sheets. He kept a silent vigil over him for hours, unmoving, not speaking… simply admiring the beauty that the Robot Master had had in life… and the last remaining vestiges he retained in death.

So peaceful… at least I know you were happy. Oh, my firefly… I'm so sorry… I should have been stronger… I could have saved you. Can you forgive me for being so weak? Can you?

A breeze lightly pushed open the unlocked window next to the dark Robot Master, and he removed his helmet to let the air caress his long hair. He shut his eyes to drive away the tears that still did not stop falling, but eventually gave up the effort.

As he sat down to take Elec Man's lifeless hand in his own, something on the windowsill caught his eye. Reaching over, he picked up a small, leather-cover book. Gently he flipped it open, and gasped at what he found inside.

March 7, 20XX

Training was difficult as hell… Pharaoh is in another of his depression moods… but now I'm beginning to understand what he's feeling… it's because of Shadow. Ever since we began our nightly excursions to study the stars and run across the grass in exhilaration of our liberty… I've been seeing things as if through new eyes. I know it sounds silly, but when one has been staying inside a dank fortress their entire life… the simple feeling of the breeze upon your face is a freedom within itself…

Shadow closed the book, unable to stand the overwhelming pain that tugged at his heart. Then he reopened it to another entry, and another.

You did care… I didn't think anyone could ever love me… except Blues.

His eyes fell upon the book, and a single remaining tear splashed onto a single sentence… one that mirrored his own words to the golden robot…

…He is my darkness, as I am his light… I feel as if I cannot live without him near me. We're so different, and yet we're the same.

I'll go on, he promised silently. I'll see you again. And with that, he opened the book to the beginning, and sat down in his beloved's easy chair to read the diary.

The diary of his firefly.

--Go now if you want it… an otherworld awaits you.--

'There's a darkness in everyone, and there is a light. Those with greater darkness seek those with greater light, and those with the light seek creatures of shadow. Such is the way of companionship… to revel in attracting opposites that induce perfection, and thus to remain content.'

Author's Notes: Please give me feedback. I put a lot of time into this story, though it's really short… and I tried to put some philosophy into it as well. I hope you all liked it! Review and let me know! ~Sierra~