Do not ask where this came from, because I haven't a clue. Usually I am very adamantly against this pairing. *shrug* Enjoy it anyway.
Because he'd always see her like this, not the strong bitchy cow who could shrivel the passerby with merely a glare, not the wealthy aristocrat wearing the finest of silk dress robes to yet another masque or ball. No, he'd always see her vulnerable, shaking, sobbing into his arms, pleading with him, begging him to run away right now, just pack their bags and never set foot in the magical world again.
"Ludicrous." He'd always reply, and she knew he was right; Voldemort would kill their families if they deserted now. Despite what everybody else thought, their families (apart from each other) meant everything to them.
"Unfair." She'd sniffle, then shrug herself out of his hold and swing her black hair over her shoulder, the demeanor for which she was so noted returning. And then she'd look away from him, once more the picturesque ice queen.
His ice queen.
oooo
It's a year later and they're in the same corner of the Slytherin common room, just the two of them. The others have learned to leave them alone by now, realized that whatever secret club Malfoy and Parkinson had they would never be a part of.
"It burns." Pansy complains, itching her forearm.
She'd just taken the mark a few weeks ago, during the Christmas holidays. It will be one of the single worst moments of Draco's life, while he stood by and watched as she was forced to endure the pain of the mark, forced to sign her life away to a sadistic not-quite-man just so she could keep breathing.
"Yes," Draco agrees, tilting his head against the brick wall, "it'll get worse, when somebody calls him. Or when he calls us."
"And how in the hell does he expect us to come to him when we're here? We can't just Apparate out of the school, surely the Dark Lord knows that much." She says his name with sneering contempt, but Draco knows it's only to cover her fear, because inside she's just a little girl, broken and homesick, but she'd never show it, not really, not if she could help it.
"We meet Snape in his office, and then leave with him for Hogsmeade. Once outside the castle grounds we Disapparate."
Pansy sighs. "Is there no way out?" Her voice is quiet and almost innocent and for a moment she is only eleven years old and still in love with magic.
Draco smirks when her brown eyes meet his, because it's laughable that she should want him-him, of all people-to find a way out of the mess they're in. "No, my love," he says, and pulls her into him, "there will never be a way out."
He really wishes, just once, he could give her the answers she wants, could be the safe harbor she needs.
oooo
He approaches him the next day. "Potter," he says, when he finds him alone on the way to the loo.
Harry looks around, his wand raised. "What do you want?" He says angrily.
"I need your help."
"Like I'd help a Death Eater. Why don't you ask your precious Dark Lord?"
"I need help getting away from him, Potter." Draco Malfoy has never asked for help, not even once in his entire life, and it is painful in ways he never knew of when he is at the mercy of Harry sodding Potter.
"So you're a coward now, is that it?" Harry asks, "ickle Drakey is too scared of real Death Eaters to play with the grown-ups?"
Draco's fist connects with Harry's nose, and there is a crunch of cracking bone as blood spurts everywhere. "It's not for me. It's for- somebody else."
Harry looks up at Draco, his hand around his bleeding nose, and for the first time since they'd met Draco can see something like respect, maybe surprise, in his eyes. "Please. I have to get her out."
Harry takes a deep breath, or as deep as he can without ingesting blood, and nods once. Draco wonders if Potter was in the same situation, would he be doing this for the Weaselette? But Draco knows he would, and he can almost see Ginny's red hair flashing before Potter's eyes as he agrees to help him.
"What the bloody hell- " Weasley is coming up the hall, and Draco looks back at Potter. "Your word." He says, and Harry nods again, and before Ron can see him Draco whirls around and is out of sight.
oooo
"Stupefy!" The first spell is easy to dodge, but Pansy's "Reducto!" shatters the grandfather clock he's hidden behind.
"How dare you, how could you even suggest that I- " Pansy heaves, and she whips her wand another time, blowing a hole clean through the far wall of the Room of Requirement. "I can't-won't- "
"You have to," Draco says, edging near her as she seems to lapse into silence, her wand arm hanging limply at her side. "They'll make it look like you were kidnapped, so your parents won't be harmed."
Pansy shakes her head, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks. "I don't want to go, not without you. You know that. I can't leave you."
He slips his arms around her, noting, as always, how naturally they fit together, how they really seem to be cut from the same mold, two pieces of a whole. In his entire life he's never done anything he can be considerably proud of. He feigns nerve and dominance for the benefit of Voldemort, for the sake of his family, but he's really quite useless, a worthless entity trying to save the girl- woman- he loves.
No, he's never done a thing in his life he could be proud of, but for once, he will put her safety before his own. Even though he never thought he'd see the day, there is somebody more valuable than himself.
"Pansy, you have to. It's the only chance. Once you're out, once you're safe, I can get out, too."
It's a lie, and they both know it. If one Death Eater is taken, the others will be doubly protected, watched even closer by Voldemort. Pansy wonders if this is the last time she will see Draco, because he is known for rashness and often strikes when everybody, even her, who knows him the best, least expects it.
oooo
"You'll wear this," Hermione Granger is whispering to her, as they stand against a wall, throwing Potter's Invisibility Cloak over her. It is midday, and there are droves of students going up and down the hallway and they are virtually unnoticed. "Hagrid is waiting in the Entrance Hall, you'll tap him on the arm and he'll take you out of castle grounds. Once in Hogsmeade you'll go into the Hog's Head. Aberforth is expecting you, and don't worry, he's promised the pub will be abandoned. From there Dumbledore has set up an Undetectable portkey that will take you straight into our headquarters."
"But, Draco- "
Hermione's face softens, and she turns to the spot where Pansy is standing. "I know." She checks her watch. "You'd best be going, or you'll be behind schedule and miss the portkey. Good luck, Pansy."
"I don't know how to- "
Hermione shakes her head, smiling. "You don't have to thank me. I'm happy to do this." And with a small wave Hermione turns on her heel and disappears into the throng of students, a scarlet and gold blur among bronzes and silvers, yellows and greens.
oooo
Pansy is counting, and so far, she's gone forty two days, eleven hours and six minutes since seeing Draco Malfoy.
"Six minutes and one second." She murmurs to nobody, because nobody is around; she's been given a room at Grimmauld Place that is strictly her own because nobody knows what to say to her, how to approach her or really even acknowledge her.
She doesn't necessarily intimidate them, they just don't really understand her. She sighs, deeply, staring out her window at the black sky, void for once of the fog and mist of London, the stars twinkling down at her, mocking her with their light, pretty and the closest thing to pure she's probably ever seen.
Pride can stand a thousand trials,
The strong will never fall
But watching stars without you,
My soul cries.
Heaving heart is full of pain,
Oh, oh, the aching
She doesn't know how she's made it this far, because Draco has been, since she was a young child, a constant in her life, and the most she's gone without seeing him is a few days. He's a part of her, weaved into her blood and into her soul and she feels like she's missing, like she's only partially visible or like she's floating because she isn't substantial enough to keep her feet on the ground.
"Six minutes and two seconds." She says, releasing the words with a strangled breath.
"Until?" A voice says from the doorway, and it's like she's possessed or watching the scene from the corner of the room, she can feel the seconds pass as her pulse pounds in her wrists and when she finally is able to move, she doesn't even have to rush to him, because he is there, his arms strong around her, like they always have been, his pine-and-juniper scent sinking into her clothes and into her hair, and they don't speak, because they don't have to, their lips touching like it's their first kiss and their bodies pressed so tightly together Pansy couldn't say where she ended and Draco began, but that's how it's meant to be.
"I was so scared." She said, the tears starting to fall, landing on the front of his shirt. "and they wouldn't tell me anything."
"Well I doubt they'd be trusting of a Death Eater." He says, and she cracks the smallest of smiles, and the action hurts her mouth because it's been so long since she smiled.
"How did you-"
Draco cuts her off by holding up a silencing hand. "Another time." He whispers, and leans in to kiss his queen once more.
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Touch me deep, pure and true,
Gift to me forever
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Where are you now?
Where are you now?
'Cause I'm kissing you.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Song used is Kissing You by Des'Ree. As always, feedback is love.