It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.
This entirely fails to take into consideration whether or not the man truly wants to marry any of the young ladies pressed upon him, and, indeed, whether or not any of the young ladies have the slightest interest in marrying the young man. None of these facts had ever deterred Professor Dumbledore.
"My dear Professor McGonagall, have you heard the news?" He beamed at her over his porridge. She lowered her newspaper just enough to be able to see him over the top.
"Have the kneazles gotten out again?"
"Oh, dear me, no. I don't think so."
"Then no, I don't believe I know the event to which you are referring," and went back to her paper. There was a long silence in which Professor Dumbledore continued to beam at Professor McGonagall in expectation.
Finally, she put down her paper. Noticing him still staring, she raised one eyebrow just a tad, "I don't suppose you would like to inform me?"
"I was talking the other day to Mrs. Abbott," he burst, "and she says that she heard from Mr. Filch – who let the gentleman in and showed him around the place- that Netherfield has been taken by a nice young man -a nice young, rich man,- by the name of Potter. And he's single!" This outburst was followed by another stretch of beaming silence.
Professor McGonagall tentatively put forth a reply, "Isn't he a bit young for-"
"My dear professor!" He threw his hands in the air. "Do you not understand what this means? Think what this means for our girls!"
"Our girls."
"The girls we have taken in and raised as our own, in this Gryffindor House, to prepare them for the life outside! I have to admit, I can barely think of Mr. Potter without the thought of his impending nuptials to one of our girls flitting across my mind."
"I'm sure that's entirely his reason for settling here."
Dumbledore tapped his chin. "Nooo, I heard from Mrs. Abbott that it was the scenery and the fresh country air. That's why I propose you take the girls and go over to see Mr. Potter-"
"Oh no." Professor McGonagall stood up stiffly. "This is your hare-brained scheme, Dumbledore, I'll-"
The dramatic moment was interrupted abruptly as three young girls, who had undoubtedly been listening at the key-hole, came tumbling unto the room as the door gave way. Lavender Brown, Parvati Patil, and Romilda Vane lay in a heap on the floor. Parvati and Lavender had the propriety to be embarrassed by the escapade, while Romilda stared unabashedly up at Dumbledore. "Is it true? That there's a handsome young man moved into Netherfield who means to marry one of us?" Lavender let out a little giggle.
The commotion drew two other girls into the room. The one with bushy brown hair looked down at Romilda with her arms crossed. "He can't very well do that if he doesn't know we exist."
Her companion spoke up softly, "We shan't be strangers forever; we're sure to meet him at a ball some time."
Parvati rolled her eyes. "Hermione's right, Adara. By the time we get to our next ball, we'll be the only girls in town who haven't met him yet. We'll have to be introduced! Can you imagine being introduced to Mr. Potter by someone like Pansy Parkinson?"
Dumbledore sighed. "I'm afraid Miss Black may turn out to be right. As embarrassing as it might be, Miss Patil – Miss Brown, would you please stop that incessant giggling? It's rather distracting- as embarrassing as it might be, without an introduction... Though I do understand the Lovegoods have been over, so it would not be as bad as an introduction from Ms. Parkinson-"
Romilda broke in again. "You don't mean to say-"
"That's not fair!"
"-Loony Lovegood-"
"-we'll never get married!"
"-I'd say it's overrated anyway."
"No one cares what you think, Hermione!"
"If everyone would just quiet down!" Everyone stopped and turned to Professor McGonagall. "As I have been trying to say: as a measure of friendly hospitality, I went to visit this young gentleman as soon as he moved in. I invited him for dinner, but he had to decline due to traveling. However, he has been gracious enough to invite us all to his next ball." At this there was a squeal of excitement, cut off sharply by Professor McGonagall's glare. "If I had know the sheer amount of nonsense that would come out of all of this, I doubt I should have gone at all. However, at this point it would be rude to decline the invitation. And now, Miss Brown, you may giggle all you like." She swept out the door in a huff, quickly followed by Dumbledore with a little nod goodbye.
Lavender sighed. "I love balls. I'll wear my prettiest dress and-"
Romilda sprang up from the floor. "I have no doubt Mr. Potter will dance with ME," she exclaimed.
Hermione huffed. "I don't suppose you'd let him escape that."
"Let's not be too hasty now," Adara Black ventured forth quietly. "We don't know anything about the gentleman. For all we know, he could be previously... attached."
"Well, he's not married yet," said Parvati. "And nothing's finalized until he's married."
"He's single, rich, young; what else is there to know?" giggled Lavender.
"Well," said Hermione, "Everything."
Miss Lovegood was promptly invited over for tea.
Hermione and Adara were left to question her on their own. Even though they were not quite as keen as the other girls for information on Mr. Potter, none of the others wanted to deal with Luna Lovegood. Luna was the closest friend Hermione had outside of Gryffindor House, so it was seen fitting (by everyone else) that she should be the one holding the inquiry.
To be continued...