An alarm screeched through the streets of Gotham punctured by gunshots and sirens. A figure wearing a red helmet sprints down a side street away from the chaos and fire consuming the bank they just robbed. He's dressed in a loose jacket, mesh covered Kevlar, baggy cargo pants and combat boots. He had a duffle bag clutched to his chest with black leather gloves.
BANG.
A batarang ricochets off of their helmet and sticks into the wall. They turn to see a dark figure peering at them through a cowl.
"Motherfucker you dented my helmet. This shit doesn't come cheap." He tapped his custom made headwear and the Batman examined it. It encased their head completely obscuring their face. Only two small eyeslits marred the surface and his eyes were still covered in a white substance that Batman assumed was the same stuff he used.
"Give me the money, Red Hood." Batman growled.
"Sorry but I stole it fair and square. I'm flattered you know my name though." He clutched the bag to his chest and chuckled.
"I know the name of the man who's mask you're wearing." Batman jumped down next to the Red Hood. "Do you know who I am?"
"Bruce Wayne: billionaire playboy. Aka "The Batman" soulless vigilante with only One Rule."
Batman froze at the use of his real name, and was rewarded for his hesitancy by a knife being stabbed into a chink of his armor. He fell to his knees and cursed as the Red Hood backflipped away.
His vision swam for a second but he forced the pain down and stood up. The Red Hood was gone and he was in no state to give chase. He made his way to the Batmobile and pulled out the knife once he was safe inside.
"Alfred." He instructed the car and it connected him to his trusted butler.
"Yes, Master Wayne?" The familiar english accent greeted him.
"I want you to use the computers to look up any escaped Arkham patients I know. the Joker, Scarecrow, all the usuals. Pull up police records for recent arrests and prisoners who escaped or got out on bail or parole."
"Meet someone new, eh?" Alfred drawled. "I'm glad you're shaking it up, sir." He hung up.
Batman pulled up his shirt to reveal the wound bleeding heavily. It was below the ribcage so he was in no danger of puncturing a lung and it was far enough over to not bleed into his stomach. Hurt like a bitch though. The knife was coated in some sort of acid that burned his skin and caused much more pain than he was used to. He grabbed the med kit from under the seat and set the car to autopilot randomly throughout the city. Stitching himself up in a moving car was not the best idea but he couldn't leave the car parked for to long. It would attract suspicion. Alfred called him back and told him what he already suspected. The Joker had escaped. Batman sighed and switched to manual just as something caught his eye.
"Not possible." He growled but pulled the car over a safe distance away. He climbed to the rooftops and ran back to where something had caught his eye. He peered over the side of the building into an alleyway.
"You worthless piece of SHIT!" The Red Hood roared and kicked the figure at his feet. "You told me you took care of it!"
The figure coughed and rose shakily to their hands and feet. "I told you I don't know what went wrong-"
The Red Hood kicked him again and he fell into the light. The Batman's eyes widened. It was the Joker.
"I don't want excuses you dirty clown." He growled and planted a foot on the Joker's chest. An expression of pure terror was on the clown's face as the Red Hood leaned over him. "I want a fucking reason why the alarm went off."
"I d-disabled it I-I swear!" The Joker stammered and the Batman was perturbed to see how scared he was of this Red Hood character.
"Liar." The Red Hood put pressure on the Joker chest and a snapping sound was heard as his ribs gave way. Batman was about to jump down when the Red Hood pulled out a cellphone.
"Hello? Yes I'm on the corner of 4th and main. There's something here you might want to pick up. Send an ambulance and a cop car." He hung up and planted the phone on the Joker after patting him down and taking his knives. He left just as the sirens could be heard and Batman followed. He let him get as far as 9th street before jumping down and planting two feet onto his back. He fell face first into the dirt with the Batman crouched on his back before skidding to a stop by a dumpster. The Red Hood lay there for a second before his elbow crashed into he side of Batman's mask and he skittered out from under him. Batman reeled from the blow but quickly recovered and noticed the Red Hood had injured his arm.
Batman started towards him but froze when he pulled a gun. At this close range he could easily exploit the chinks in his armor, and Batman didn't want to go out like that.
"Now now Batman, play nice." Red Hood chuckled. His voice sounded distorted by the helmet and the laughter rang out eerily.
"Put the gun down now."
"Ballsy move. Usually people only give orders when they have a gun." The Hood fired and the bullet wedged its way into Batman's Kevlar. He stumbled back from the force and in an instant the Hood was on him. Blow after blow rained down on him as he kicked punched and stabbed every weak point in his armor.
*he knows my weak spots, he knows my name but he doesn't kill. Who is he?*
Finally the Red Hood raised his arms a little to slowly and Batman swung out his feet knocking him to the ground. His head cracked into the wall and Batman followed up with a solid kick to the leg and several hard punches to his abdomen. Although he had only hit him a fraction of the times the Hood had hit him, his blows were all the more devastating and the Hood collapsed.
"Now now Batsy." He panted clutching his side. "I knew you were rough but this is the first date."
The Batman winced at the use of the Jokers nickname for him and the innuendo.
"You know, you beat the shit out of the last guy who called me that."
"The homicidal clown? He's the one who told me everything about you! He was fun until he became a pain."
Batman examined him. He had a few broken ribs a dislocated elbow and shoulder and his leg was swollen. One of the bones in his foot was shattered and he was covered in cuts and bruises. He wanted to send him to Arkham or prison but he wouldn't be cared for there and he sure as hell didn't trust him at a hospital.
"Dammit." He muttered.
"Oh don't feel bad about me knowing your name. I am very persuasive."
"Shut up." Batman scooped him up in his arms and he whistled.
"Nice muscles Batsy. Watch the arms, I still have my dignity." As if to punctuate the sentence he drove a knife into Batman's arm and pressed a button on it. Electricity course through Batman and he dropped the Hood. He rolled to the side and in a second got up and started running. Batman swore and got to his feet before launching himself at the man and tackling him into a wall. He cuffed him and removed all of his weapons before slinging him over his shoulder and calling the Batmobile to his location.
"You have broken ribs. Why the hell would you try to run?"
"I can handle myself." He snapped, suddenly serious.
Batman shoved him into the back of the car feeling as if he would regret this. All the way to the Batcave, the Red Hood was oddly silent although Batmam checked every so often to see if he was conscious and breathing.
"Hood?" Batman checked.
"I'm awake I'm breathing and I'm pissed." The Red Hood retorted. "Just like the last time."
"You might have a concussion. Stay awake." Batman growled and sped up the car. "We're almost there."
"Do you always bring the villains to your house?"
"No."
"So I'm special? Huh. I'm flattered."
"It's not you. I've never hurt anyone this badly."
"So I AM special." The Red Hood paused. "One rule almost broken?"
"You have me no choice. Most villains give up after a few bruises a broken nose or a sprained ankle. You showed no sign of slowing so I assumed you were less hurt than you were." He was rambling. He needed to stop.
"I guess most villains are wusses." He chuckled.
"What are your powers?" Batman suddenly asked examining him in the rear view mirror.
"Why do you assume I have powers?"
"You tried to run on a broken foot."
"I don't have powers, I just really didn't want the night to end like this."
"With you being captured?" Batman growled. "You chose the wrong city if you wanted easy."
"I didn't. I wanted a challenge. I thought I would just catch your attention and then go from there. Didn't expect I'd get a peek at the Batcave."
"Well congratulations. You have my undivided attention." Batman said. "God you sound like the Joker."
"I'm as far from him as possible. He craves your attention and will do anything to get it, even if it's negative attention like you beating him up. Fucking masochistic clowns. I, however do not need or crave your attention. You simply interest me." The Red Hood was starting to sound overly cold and calculating. Batman felt a little worried and finished the drive in silence. They pulled into the Batcave and he stopped the car. Before he could turn around Red Hood opened the door and stepped out. Batman quickly followed suit and ran around the car.
"Nice place you've got he-urgh." He fell to his knees and clutched at his broken ribs. "Dam."
Batman frowned at the figure in front of him, partly from pity but partly from confusion. He scooped him up and carried him over to an exam table.
"I have to set your elbow and shoulder as well as wrap your ribs and possibly plaster your foot."
"No." The Red Hood struggled against Batman's arms. "I'm fine."
"No you're not." He pushed down firmly and used the restraints to tie the Red Hood to the table.
"Let me go!" He strained against the metal cuffs and Batman sighed. "Let me go you- oww.."
"What hurts?" Batman looked over at him quizzically.
"Nothing it's just a headache. I'm fine."
"It could be a concussion. I'm going to have to examine your head."
"Hell no!" The Red Hood commenced to kicking and swearing every time the Batman got near him but eventually he managed to remove the metal mask covering his head.
"Oh." Was all the Batman said as he peered down at his advisory's face.
"Shut up." All the fight had gone out of her, yes: her. The Red Hood was a girl. A young one at that. And she was looking very, very pissed. "Congrats. You figured it out. Now let me up."
He released the metal cuffs binding her and she sat up slowly. Batman was at a lost for word and covered this by preparing bandages. He removed the kevlar to get a better look at her wounds. Scars laced her torso and bruises from the recent fight were beginning to tint her skin an ugly purple color. Now that her Kevlar was removed Batman could easily tell her gender. He dressed her wounds and wrapped up her chest so her ribs would heal straight. After that he did he same to her foot and then began examining her elbow and shoulder.
"I'm going to have to set it." He gestured to her arm and with a sigh she reached over and popped her shoulder back into it's socket. Batman winced and she rolled her eyes.
"Now do my elbow. I can never pull hard enough." She gestured and he complied, pulling until the joint straightened out. She winced this time and stretched her arm when he was finished.
"Well, I'll be heading on my way now." She grabbed her helmet and started to leave before Batman grabbed her shoulder.
"No. You're still a criminal. You're staying here, and I'm calling the police." He cuffed her to the table and her glare was murderous at best. He started to dial Gordon but stopped when she spoke.
"Do you really want to lock me up with a bunch of homicidal men, Bats? I'm only 18."
"You're an adult. You have to pay for what you've done."
"One bank robbery and I'm going to Arkham?"
"You're obviously not sane."
"That's what they said last time." She muttered and Batman froze.
"Last time?" He questioned.
"I went to that hell hole you call an asylum when I was 14 because i tried to hide my dad from the cops. When they found him I flipped my shit and killed one so they packed me up. Electroshock therapy is the most humane thing in that place." She snapped. "I've been on the street for a month now, and my scars are older than that. You do the math."
Batman slowly set down the phone. "You're telling me they torture you in there?"
She rolled her eyes. "No, I ASK them to beat me half to death. I'm masochistic like that." She snarled sarcastically and sat up. "Don't tell me the Dark Knight is clueless to what happens to his foes."
Batman turned away from her and rubbed his face.
"Oh my god you are clueless aren't you." She laughed. "Perfect. No wonder all the psychos in there hate you! You lock them up time and time again without ever caring why they keep breaking out! Have you ever wondered why no one gets any less insane in there? If anything they get more nuts because of the torture. They don't treat you. They experiment on you to see what works for other patients. At best. Sometimes they just like to hear you scream." Her face darkened and Batman sank into a chair as he removed his cowl.
"Holy shit you're Bruce Wayne." Her eyes widened.
Bruce looked at her quizzically. "I though you already knew my real name. That Joker had told you."
"He didn't tell me anything. I figured it out on my own and even then it was a half assed guess. I figured I was wrong when you didn't get super pissed and start beating me up more."
Bruce suppressed a groan and strode over to the Batcomputer where he began doing a search on his new guest.
"So if this is a Batcave and you drive in a Batmobile with Batarangs and use a Batcomputer and you are the Batman," She mused, "Why the hell is your sidekick Robin?"
"What name would you suggest?" She was getting him to talk more than the other villains. He wondered why.
"Batboy. Duh." She silently tugged at her bonds. "I mean Bats and Robins are nothing alike. I'm even more confused about how Dick went from Robin to Nightwing. He should have started out darker if he was working with the Dark Knight."
Bruce froze. "What did you call Robin?"
"Dick? As in Dick Grayson? You know your son/sidekick."
"What makes you think Dick is Robin."
"Don't be an idiot. Now that I know who you are it makes sense. Even how Harvey knows who you are and always brags about it in Arkham. I guess that means the current Robin is Jason. She giggled. "Oh my god. Jason."
"What's so funny?" Bruce growled and put his head in his hands. His computer was turning up nothing on her and his patience was running low.
"You'll see when Jason meets me." She chuckled more and Bruce sighed.
"What is your name?" He asked deciding to be direct.
"Jane Doe." She laughed at her own joke.
"Alright. You want to play this game?" Batman pulled her up and uncuffed her from the table only to recuff her hands behind her back and shove her down in a metal chair.
"What is your name?" His eyes flashed with anger and hers twinkled with amusement.
"Jack Napier." She laughed even harder although Bruce didn't understand the joke, besides that it was a boys name.
"What are your parents names?" Anything to go on.
"Mom and Dad." She didn't laugh this time.
Bruce frowned and grabbed her hair yanking her head back.
"Hey Bruce why don't you just run a DNA check on my hair? It's a lot easier than playing 20 questions." She smiled sweetly. "You're already pulling my hair out, might as well be for a reason instead of just fueling your sadistic side."
Bruce plucked a hair and cursed himself for letting his anger cloud his mind. "I don't have a sadistic side."
"That's not what the Joker told me about you." Bruce ignored her and fed the sample into his computer. "Course if I am to believe everything he says then ally ways turn you on."
Bruce slammed his fist into the desk leaving a large dent and then spun around kicking over the chair she was cuffed to. She fell backwards and Bruce stood there panting.
"What did he tell you?" Bruce prayed she was bluffing. It had been one time. ONE TIME where he lost control and took possession of the Joker.
"He told me he was walking funny for a few days afterwards." She giggled and stared up at him from the floor. "I didn't know Bats were well hung."
Bruce's hand shot forward and pulled her up by her neck until she was face to face with him.
"You have such pretty eyes." She murmured and he dropped her from surprise.
"Why do you do that?" He snarled.
"Do what? Compliment you? Has no one ever told you they liked your eyes? I do. Even behind the cowl. I've always had a thing for blue eyes..." She trailed off and when Bruce looked over at her she seemed lost in thought.
"What are you thinking of?" He asked, not expecting for her to respond.
"Jason and Dick have blue eyes. Very bright."
Bruce didn't think he could take very many more of her comments before he snapped. He sighed in relief when he heard Jason heading down the stairs.
"Oh shit he can't see me yet!" She swore and dove under the table. Before Bruce could react Jason called out to him.
"Bruce?" He stepped tentatively towards him and Bruce knew something was on his mind. "Can I, um, tell you something?"
Bruce looked down at the young boy. He was 18 and had seen more than many do in a life time, not to mention the fact he could take down half a squadron of highly trained police men without breaking a sweat. Sometimes he acted as if he was a shy 10 year old and it befuddled Bruce. At other times he was dark, scary even which made Bruce nervous for his ward.
"Of course. What is it?" Bruce glanced towards the table to make sure she was still there.
"I.. Well I'm dating a girl..." Jason blushed. "I actually have been for a while and it's getting pretty serious. I just wanted to know if I could bring her over for dinner. Nothing too fancy she's only at my school on a scholarship but I want you to meet her." Jason glanced up at Bruce who's eyebrows had nearly disappeared into his hairline.
"Why didn't you tell me this sooner?"
"You're always so judgmental of who I date and you tend to freak out most people. I wanted to make sure I really liked her." Jason muttered and stared at his shoes.
"Of course she can come over." Bruce smiled.
"Oh thank you!" Jason beamed. "You're going to love her. She's really smart and she loves to read not to mention she's a whiz with computers. Get this, we met at the gym when she was beating the crap out of a guy bigger than you! Turns out she's a martial artist and has a black belt in nearly every fighting style..." Jason prattled on and then stopped and frowned.
"What is it?" Bruce had been edging towards the table trying to figure out how he was going to explain the girl under it.
"Well, she's not very... Feminine." He sighed.
Bruce stopped and furrowed his brow. "How so?"
"She doesn't like to wear girls clothes and she acts kind of tomboyish and she has really short hair."
At this Bruce froze. *You'll see when Jason meets me* her voice rang out in his mind.
"What is her name?" He asked very evenly.
"Nyya." He smiled. "Isn't that just a wonderful name?"
"I'd like to think so." She called out from underneath the table and Jason nearly jumped out of his skin.
"Nyya?" He said and she emerged smiling.
"Hey babe! I'd hug you but my hands are a little tied." She turned around to show him her cuffs.
"What the hell happened?" He looked from Bruce to Nyya.
"Well I decided to meet your parent by my self but I stumbled on the Batcave so he cuffed me and hit me a bunch while threatening to send me to jail if I told anyone." She chuckled.
"Bruce?" Jason looked at his mentor with a confused expression.
"That's not true. She robbed a bank and I hurt her more than I should have. I brought her here for medical attention and she hid when you showed up."
"So it's just a coincidence my girlfriend is my fathers enemy?"
"It kind of is." She leaned up against the wall. "I told you the truth about the scholarship. I am rather smart which led to boredom. So I decided to be Nyya during the day and the Red Hood at night. Chuckles here went a little overboard during the fight so now I'm here. I had a hunch Bruce Wayne was Batman but it was only a hunch and I had no idea you were Robin until about 5 minutes ago. You didn't even tell me you were THE Jason Todd until the second date." She chuckled but then winced and slid down to a sitting position. Jason rushed over to her with a concerned expression on her face.
"What did you do to her?" He shot a look at Bruce and helped Nyya over to the table.
"She robbed a bank!" He was taken aback by Jason's anger at him.
"The Joker had killed people and you've hurt him less." Jason examined Nyya who was now seating lightly from the pain.
"He always gave up. She tried to attack me with broken ribs." The computer beeped and Bruce looked over to see it had found a match for her DNA. It confirmed her name, Nyya Sullivan, and her age, 18, as well as some other trivial information like school records and grades. Bruce found out she was a straight A student who took place in wrestling, debate club and theater as well as having jumped from sports team to sports team covering everything from track to football. She seemed a likely candidate for a full scholarship to Jason's school and he didn't have a hard time believing her backstory. He turned around to see Jason murmuring to her as she shook her head violently.
"I have one question. You said you went into Arkham. When did that happen?"
She sighed. "For a month when I was 12. After that they deemed me sane and dumped me on the streets as an emancipated minor. I enrolled in Gotham High until I could get a scholarship to Gotham Prep. I'm graduating at the end of the year with full honors. That is, unless you throw me in jail."
"You aren't actually going to out her in Blackgate!" Jason exclaimed.
"I was thinking more along the lines of Arkham." Bruce muttered. "Where did you get those scars if not in the Asylum?"
"Knife fights mainly." She frowned. "A few are self made." Jason stared. "Sorry babe I was gonna tell you. I just didn't want you to freak." She smiled sadly.
Bruce sighed. "I find that kind of funny."
"I find it kind of sad." Jason snapped. How could he be so cold?
"The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had." Nyya sang and the two heroes stared at her. "Oh come on you've never heard of Mad World?" Jason shook his head. "Gary Jules? No? Dam." She closed her eyes and muttered. "I'm cold."
Jason strode over to Bruce and confided in him. "I talked to her and I think she's doing this for attention and out of boredom."
"Remind you of anyone?" Bruce growled. "There's a certain clown I know who seems to have a lot in common with your girlfriend."
"Yes but now we can prevent her from becoming like him. If we take her in-"
"Absolutely not." Bruce cut him off.
"Bruce, come on! She would be a great addition to the team and I'm sure she wouldn't cause trouble if we just showed her a little kindness."
"I don't show villains mercy and you shouldn't let your emotions cloud your judgement. It will cause you to make bad decisions." Bruce turned away from him and continued to type on his computer.
"What, like fucking the Joker in an ally?" Jason snapped.
Bruce froze. "How do you know about that?"
"Oh please. The Joker flat out told me. I didn't believe him at first but after I put the pieces together t became pretty obvious." Jason snarled and his dark side reared its ugly head. "Couldn't keep you hands off him, huh? Tell me, was that because of clouded judgement or just plain lust?"
Bruce whirled around and grabbed his arms. "It was a mistake. One I'm trying to stop you from making with her."
"I'm not making a mistake. I've been dating her since 10th grade. " He growled softly and met his fathers glare.
Bruce dropped his arms and stepped back. "You hid this from me for 3 years? Why?"
"Because you're not exactly the type of person who is open about things." Jason rubbed his face. "I'm sorry but I know her. Maybe not this side of her as well but I knew she had a bad past and I got over it. So now I'm telling you either she stays of I go with her."
Bruce paused and contemplated this before turning and walking over to Nyya.
"What would you say to staying with me and Jason."
"No." She stated simply.
"No?" Bruce raised his eyebrows. "I thought you said you were interested in me. You're obviously interested in Jason."
"Yes I am. But being the bad guy is to much fun, and you don't even kill people. I figure I'd rather be in prison than stuffed up in a mansion."
"Nyya." Jason whispered. "Please."
Nya's eyes softened and she her head away from the pair.
"Stay with us and I assure you, it will be far from boring." Jason placed a hand on her arm and she turned back to face him.
"I have some conditions." She stated and Jason smiled. "I want my own room with no cameras and a private bathroom. I also want to design my own costume and weapons along with my own name. No Ms. Robin or Batgirl shit. Finally, I warn you both I will attack without warning just to keep you on your toes and I expect you to do the same." She finished and stared expectantly.
"Deal." Bruce said gruffly. "Jason, bring her to the guest room and then get some sleep." He turned and walked up the stairs to the mansion. Jason picked up Nyya in his arms and she kissed him, smiling.
"Your plan worked." She giggled.
"I told you it would. Burning down the bank was a little much though." Jason sighed. "And you should have quit much earlier to avoid the pain."
"I love how he doesn't find anything weird with the coincidence that you were going to tell him about me the same day I show up as a villain." They climb the spiral staircase and emerge in the mansion.
"Don't you think the initial refusal was overkill? You could have just said yes."
"To suspicious. Hey when did you tell me you were Robin?"
"I think our 1 year anniversary." Jason mused.
"That was when we started to joke about doing this." They had reached the guest room and Jason laid her down on the queen sized bed before laying next to her.
"Hey our story was 90 percent true." He pulled her into him and she smiled.
"Except you not knowing I used to cut and you bot know I was Red Hood."
Jason sighed contentedly. He felt bad about tricking his father but with all the secrets Bruce kept he felt he was allowed to keep a few of his own. The silenced stretched on for a while until Jason broke it.
"I still can't believe you were an Arkham patient."
"I told you it was mainly because of my dad. Funny thing is, I don't think he even knows he knocked up my mom. He was so abusive to her he didn't care when she left for 9 months. When I was 5 and she finally showed me to him I could have been anyone's. It's not like my mother was any more pure than him."
"Have you talked to either of them since you were 12?"
"I haven't talked to Harley since then but I saw Jack today."
"What'd you do?"
"Beat him up for not silencing the alarm."
"That was part of the plan."
"Well I know that but he doesn't. Are you sure you're not freaked out I'm the offspring of the Joker and Harley Quinn?"
"Not as long as you are ok with my dad being a vigilante." He smiled. "Besides I like your crazy side."
They kissed and soon fell asleep, the son of a Bat and the daughter of a Joker entwined in the moonlight.