The Flintstones in Dazed and Confused, a flintstones fanfic

The Flintstones in Dazed and Confused.

"Wiiiiilmaaaaa!" Fred Flintstone shouted as he ate the last of his popcorn while watching the Super Boulder on TV.

"What is it, dear?" Wilma asked, walking up to her slob of a husband.

"Refill that for me, and get me another beer. This game's heating up."

Wilma sighed as she went into the kitchen to melt a stick of butter and refill the bowl. While doing these things, she rubbed a belly that was just beginning to increase in size from her pregnancy, despite the fact that she was only a month and a half gone. She remembered when her mother had been pregnant with her younger sister, only starting to show once she had been pregnant three months, and the thought crossed Wilma's mind that maybe the father of this child was… Then she quickly dismissed the thought. After all, plenty of women had done what she had to get their rocks off when their husbands suffered from impotency because of their indolent lifestyles, and nothing had ever come of it, so this was obviously just a child impatient to be born.

Thus reassuring herself, Wilma poured the hot melted butter over the popcorn, got a beer from the fridge and opened it, then carried the items through to Fred.

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Two and a half months after the Super Boulder, Fred Flintstone was dashing beside the gurney which was carrying his hugely pregnant wife through the corridors of the delivery suite as she laboured to give birth to his child. He was so proud that he was going to be a daddy at last! When the gurney reached the delivery room, however, he was told to wait outside because it was no place for any man except the doctor, so he strode impatiently up and down in the corridor outside for the next two hours as Wilma's pained cries reached his ears and filled him with apprehension.

Finally, Fred was allowed inside to see his wife, who had a happy smile on her face as a tiny version of Dino, their dog, sucked on each of her nipples, another twelve puppies crying out as they hungrily and impatiently waited their turn. No sooner had Fred taken in this evidence of his wife's bestiality than he blacked out, the doctor catching him so he wouldn't hit his head on the floor.

"I guess the proud father isn't the father," the midwife remarked, her amusement clear in her voice.

It was the following month that Barney Rubble dashed through the delivery suite beside his own wife, then waited in the same area that Fred had while Betty gave birth to a litter of nine sabre-toothed kittens.